₦airaland Forum

Everything was going on fine today for Kemi, but
the thought of the text message she got early
today wasn’t helping her think straight, she
couldn’t go to the Police, the Nigerian Police
would never know how to handle this, moreover
this menace has people everywhere, she knew
who the menace was, it was Ken, one of her
customers, she met him few years earlier when
the bank sent them out to bring in money, the
target Kemi got was so impossible, she looked
for people everywhere until a strange number
called her one hot Tuesday afternoon.
Ken had a sweet calm but firm voice; he spoke
with so much confidence,
She picked up and said hello,
Ken: “Hello, am I speaking with Kemi?”
Kemi replied “Yes, this is Kemi”
Ken replied “How are you, hope your day has
been very good?”
Kemi replied “Well, my day is good, please who
am I speaking with?”
Ken replied “My name is Ken, and I was hoping
we could do business together”
Kemi replied “Ok Ken, what kind of business do
you have in mind?”
Ken replied “I understand you’re a marketer with
a bank, I want to open an account and hope to
run the account frequently”
Kemi replied “Okay, where is your office, so I
can come over to discuss this with you and how
much are we talking about”
Ken replied “No use coming to my office, lets
meet at a neutral location, most of my business
is abroad, so I don’t have a registered business
address here”
Kemi replied “You still haven’t told me how
much we’re looking at”
Ken smiled and replied “Well, since you’re so
adamant, am looking at N50m for a start and
then monthly or bimonthly installments of lesser
or higher amount”
Kemi was ecstatic on the phone but kept her
calm and responded “Ok, I’m sure we can
arrange something for you sir, but if you don’t
mind me asking, who gave you my number?”
Ken broke a small laugh and told her “The
person who gave me your number wants to
remain anonymous, let’s meet at the Palms,
food court, tomorrow after work by 7pm”
Kemi replied “I would still want to know who
gave you my contact still, but I don’t think I can
meet 7pm, can’t we make it earlier like 4pm”
Ken cuts in “Okay, will try to make it for 4pm
then, have a good day, I need to end this call
now.”
Kemi replied “very well then, tomorrow is a
date, I will call you tomorrow to confirm”
Ken replied “Ok then, bye”
Kemi was so happy that she screamed out that
all colleagues in her office looked at her cubicle,
she covered her mouth and apologized as she
went back into her seat, Lola, her close office
colleague went to her and asked what it was, she
explained to Lola and they both laughed and
hugged, at last Kemi was going to make her
target for the year.
That was almost 2 years ago, now Ken had her
laundering his dirty money around the country
and abroad, although he gives her tips, he has
made sure she keeps her mouth shut by
threatening to kill her mother in Ijebu, Ken had
put a couple of local mercenaries in O.O.U to
tail her, and luckily for Ken, one of the boys
lived in her mother’s house, Ken had told her
that if anything should happen or even as much
as get unwanted attention from the Police, her
mother dies.
This new money is to be put into different
accounts and moved into a Singaporean account
for some oil trade transaction, she had done her
part of the job, all she could tell was that she
was part of a bigger and broader conspiracy.

17 AWOSIKA EPISODE 7: Martins and Kemi drove into the compound to
park right behind BK, and martins opened the
boot of the car to bring out a NIKE bag, he
pulled it out with his laptop bag and proceeded
to their flat. Kemi was still wondering what was
in the bag, she didn’t want to ask Martins as she
was confident he will not disclose; so as Martins
disappeared into the bathroom, she went into
the kitchen to prepare a little dinner, and as
soon as she heard him having his bath, she
rushed into the bedroom to check for the bag,
but couldn’t find the NIKE bag, she checked
everywhere still she couldn’t find it.
–
She checked underneath the bed and found an
unusual black nylon bag and pulled it out and
found the NIKE bag inside the black nylon bag.
–
Kemi laughed to herself knowing the kind of
husband she had, he should have looked for a
career in the Secret Services rather than Law.
She opened the bag to find jogging clothes with
a box of NIKE running shoes.
–
Kemi laughed hard as Martins came out of the
bathroom and found her with the package and
also started laughing and said “Now, we will jog
together and I have paid for another gym
somewhere else”….
……
5:00am , Kemi receives a text message saying
“The money is ready and its N25M this time
around, if you do as we say, all will be fine,
we’ve kept our part of the bargain, its time for
you to do your part, will send you further
instructions later on today, its strongly
recommended you delete after reading”
..
She completely understood the text and who its
from.
..
Kemi immediately deletes the text, wakes
Martins up for morning devotion, wondering
when this blackmail will be over.
-----------------------------------------------------
Abuja Airport:
Bernard Ejiofor moved out of the arrival terminal
with just a small portable carry-on luggage
dressed in corporate attire without a tie, in a
dark grey suit with pointed black shoes and a
light blue David August Designer shirt. He made
his way to the road to get a cab; however the
Abuja 10AM sun wasn’t for kids, so he reached
for his Ray Ban dark shades from his jacket.
He moved over to an empty cab and told the
driver his destination, the middle-aged Igbo cab
driver opened pulled a lever just beneath the
seat to open the boot of the car, Bernard
moved back and placed his luggage there, closed
the boot, unbuttoned his jacket and sat at the
back of the car, the cab was fairly new, the
driver increased the radio volume a bit ,
switched the A.C on and eased on to the FCT
roads, the cab driver was making little
conversation but Benard’s wasn’t up for it.

17 AWOSIKA EPISODE 6: ts Tuesday morning, BK had a delivery of 5
Blackberry Z30 smartphones to some ministry worker at Alausa, to himself BK said, all this ministry workers and their young girlfriends sef. sha, which one be my own?
–
But as soon he delivered the phones, they asked
for a receipt, because they wanted to log into
the ministry account and he needs to present a
receipt for the purchase. He rushed to the car,
but found out he had already exhausted the one
in his car, and since he lived in Opebi , he
decided to make a dash home because he
needed the money for another transaction later
on today…..
–
On arriving home, he honked at the gate thrice
at first, no reply, he looked at his AP wrist
watch, he remembered how he blackmailed his
father to collect the watch; it was 11:30 in the
morning, where would Umar be?
–
Or had he gone to drive his friend’s bike to
make extra cash?
–
All other thoughts came to BK’s head but after
waiting impatiently for a while, he got out of the
car, opened the small gate found it unlocked,
the house was deserted as usual, and headed
towards Umar’s room close to the fence,
something the landlord just created.
A one room apartment with bathroom.
–
As he approached the door, he could hear a
woman’s moan but faintly, he moved towards
the door and opened the door, unfortunately,
Umar’s door wasn’t locked, BK opened to find
Umar stark naked pumping into Eno without any
care in the world, Umar spread Eno’s legs apart
and pumped her from the center, Eno was nude,
her b00bs were small but were looking turgid
and perky , very rounded, her nipples were
standing like the number 1.
BK screamed “Umar!!! At least lock the door, my
goodness”
..
He proceeded to the BQ, rushed into the
bedroom, picked up a new receipt booklet and
headed back to Alausa. Luckily for him, the client
was still around because with Ministry workers,
one can only pray and hope, that they will still
be there after 1 hour of them resuming work,
but thanks for Fashola , they were now being
punished and held accountable, no more snail
speed work at the ministry.
..
BK couldn’t just stop thinking about that sight of
Umar and Eno, Umar pumping into Eno like was
no man’s business, wow! But that Umar rod sef
wey be like baby hand sha; he nearly bashed a
NAPEP driver, they both hurled insults at each
other and everyone proceeded their own ways.
–
BK was given a keystone bank cheque,so he went to the next available branch to cash it; he had
accounts with almost every bank in the country
for easily clearing of the cheques. BK was happy
because his cheque would soon clear and he
could run off to the island to buy his treadmill,
he made a resolution to look like Will Smith very
soon, a treadmill will be the start of his new
look initiative; plus he needed to practice his
jogging so he could impress that Susan babe at
Unilag on Saturday.
–
Having a conversation with a lady wasn’t a big
deal but having that conversation while jogging
was.
–
BK met Susan roughly 6 weeks ago when he and
Niran went on jogging, otherwise known as
Unilag babe scouting. Susan was a chic in every
word of it, cream looking babe, spoke well, had
this perfectly curved a$$, her hips were to die
for and her b00bs looked handful. BK made sure
he wore tight briefs underneath his jogging
pants anytime he went to Unilag sports center;
BK hit it off with her underneath the Sports
center where she went to buy a Lucozade Sports
Drink,
..
He started the conversation with
“Hello I’m sorry
to bother you but are you training for any
competition”
–
Susan smiled “That line is kind of old, no
competition, I just want to continue to look like
this, I love to eat a lot you see, but I really
shouldn’t be telling you that”
–
They both laughed.
–
BK replied “Yes, you’re right, that definitely isn’t
first date talk, but it’s alright. My name is
Bukunmi but most people call me BK and I would
appreciate it if you also called me BK “
–
Susan replied “Ok, BK, my name is Susan, are
you a student here?”
..
Bk replied “Me, a student? No way, do I look
that young”
..
Susan replied “Am sorry, Bukunmi, wow, I’m
making so many mistakes, please let me
rephrase”
..
BK replied “Please, go ahead”
..
She said, “I never said you were a student, BK, I
just asked”
..
BK replied “No worries, was just pulling your
legs. Of course not, I’m done with school, I’m a
contractor, you?”
..
Susan replied “Cool, what kind of contractor, like
Jason Stratham in The Mechanic?”
BK replied “Of course not, but if I tell you, I
would have to kill you..James Bond style”
–
They both laughed.
..
BK replied “I am into supplies, I buy and sell
stuffs but not clothes, I sell laptops, phones and
electronics, not the kind of job you like right”?
..
Susan replied “Who told you that I don’t like
that kind of job, I approve of it more than
anything, because you’re a small business owner
and, remember none of those guys on the
world’s richest list work for anyone, so you
might be on your way to that list”
–
BK spoke to himself, mehn Igbo chic’s n
o dey disappoint me jare, but she looks very
intelligent, nothing turns me on more than a
smart hottie.
–
Susan excused herself “BK, I need to run now, I
need to get back to work now, hope we can
catch up soon”
..
BK replied “But you haven’t told me what you do
at all, it’s been all about me. So tell me what
you do”?
..
Susan replied “I’m a Doctor. We will catch up
soon, have a good day”
..
BK was speechless, such a cute doctor, wow! He
managed to say goodbye, he was dumbfounded,
he thought of how stupid he was not asking for
her number but then again he thought there was
no need rushing this moreover, this kind of
babes will find it rather basic of me asking of her
phone number, the usual norm, I need to prove
to her that am different.
–
BK watched as she drove away, giving him a light
smile as she drove off.
–
BK knew buying this treadmill, it would give him
the chance to show her that he was also quite
energetic so he could impress her; but Umar is a
motherfucker sha, the scene couldn’t leave his
memory, he planned to question Umar when he
got home.
–
But that Enoh’s body wasn’t looking like a
maid’s body especially her b00bs….simply
wow….

SMALLPENIS:
FTC!!!
martins na gay ni?

guy, e get the kinda guy wey u go see your babe/wife with and u no go fit just comot your mind. you'll understand why Uzor was on his mind as the story goes on sha

HAPPY NEW WEEK LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. MAY THIS NEW WEEK BRING WITH IT BLESSINGS, LOVE AND FUN.
17 AWOSIKA EPISODE 5:
Saturday mornings were always the laziest
mornings for Kemi. She wakes up late, farfs
around the house for another 30 minutes, and
then takes a light bath and heads to the gym, 2
streets away.
–
Martins was still sleeping like no man’s business;
they had a TGIF party in their office the night
before, and even concluded it at Rehab. Kemi
stared at him wondering why he didn’t invite her
for the party because it’s a tradition to invite
someone for the TGIF especially the last one for
the month. It was usually grand, and you could
bring a guest. It’s all about fun, eating, drinking,
socializing and much more, but for some strange
reason, Martins didn’t tell Kemi about this one.
She wasn’t exactly mad at him until now, that
his snoring from what seemed to have been a
very fun night for him was starting to irritate
her.
–
Kemi put on her gym clothes, a silky 3-quarter
short and a sports singlet with sports bra
underneath , with her black Nike running shoes,
she sat at the tip of the bed, tapped him a little
on the lap and says “Martin, am off to the gym,
should be back in hour or so, I will lock the door
with my key from outside”. Martin managed to
raise his hand to signal that he had heard her
while changing his sleeping position, lying on his
belly while covering his head with the pillow.
Kemi smiled and shook her head as she walked
away.
–
Getting out of the house and moving towards
the gate, she saw BK cleaning his car foot mat,
trying to guess why he was scrubbing tirelessly,
she says to herself “It must be those girls he
keeps carrying that puked in his car, may God be
with this boy, he’s a chronic womanizer”.
–
BK noticed a movement behind him, because the
way the house was built, everyone parked in
front of the main house, in 2 rows with BK’s car
in front so he doesn’t disturb people who have
to leave for work early in the morning.
–
BK said to himself, “This Kemi babe set sha,
Martins dey try o; so bank go come send me
this kind babe, make e come market to me, I go
give am all my money….” laughing to himself.
–
He then sneaks a greeting at her, “Kemi, Good
morning, how is Martins? Don’t look at those
boys with the huge biceps there o”! laughing,
–
Kemi replied “Morning BK, Martins is still
sleeping, they had a party last night at their
office, so he’s still sleeping, but don’t worry, I
wont be looking at those guys with the biceps, I
have found the bone of my bone from whose rib
I was taken out from. “
–
BK replied “Me sef go fall in love and marry one
day o. I was at his office yesterday, it was kind
of a big party and I have clients there, you know
my phone business na, I sell to some of the
lawyers there. They asked me to come for my
money yesterday and by the time I got there,
there was this party, and so I went with the
flow, we later went to Rehab”
Kemi replied “So, BK, you were also there and
Martins’ wife, Moi wasn’t there? we will talk
more about this, I need to hit the gym now, my
aerobics instructor is way too time conscious
for my liking, not taking into consideration that
this is the weekend. See you later”
–
Kemi stepped out of the gate to find Umar, the
gateman with 2 of his bike driving friends
gisting, he said in his Hausa accent,
–
“Good morning ma” Kemi replied
..
“Umar, how you dey na? How all those your
wives na?”
..
Umar replied “Madam, am fine o, I no get am for
wife o, no money na. Yoruba and igbo girls too
like money”.
..
Kemi laughed and proceeded to the gym on foot.
..
Getting to the gym, Kemi found out that most
of her fellow aerobics people were not around,
so she proceeded to the treadmill, started with a
walk and then after a light jog, increased the
tempo.
–
Most of the people who came into the gym
always steal a glance at the “hottie” on the
treadmill. The aerobics instructor then moved
towards her direction and informed her that the
aerobics classes were about to start, Kemi
slowed down the treadmill until it finally came to
a halt.
–
She proceeded to the aerobics classes and
shared a few greetings here and there with
almost everyone in the class, the class started
with a usual fast beat song and with the usual
123 , 321, motioning them to push their thighs
almost to touch their chest before putting it
down.
–
They were exercising to Barbra Streisand by
Duck Sauce; Kemi almost running out of breath
wondered why she had worked with the treadmill
when this aerobics thing itself was quite
strenuous.
–
They stopped with the thigh/chest exercise and
proceeded to the waist exercise, then the
instructor asked them to put their hands on
their waist twisting 5 times to the left and
another 5 times to the right.
–
Done with aerobics Kemi proceeded to walk back
home. she was just about hitting Awosika street,
when a car started honking at her consistently;
her initial thought was to ignore but the honking
was getting very annoying, she looked back to
see a red 2010 Toyota Avalon, she tried to look
at who the driver was but the glass was tinted,
the driver opened the door and out came Uzor.
–
Kemi didn’t know how exactly to react either to
be happy or surprised, what was he doing in her
neighbourhood? he hurried off to meet her
where she stood;
–
“Hi Kemi, good morning,” Kemi replied “Morning
Uzor, what brings you doing here”?
..
Uzor replied “My Aunt stays on the street right
before Awosika here, I’m here to drop my
mother with her, she just came in from Abuja,
first flight”.
..
Kemi replied “Alright, how was her flight, and
how is your sister”?
..
Uzor replied “Her flight was okay, she’s coming
in from Abuja, from my brother’s house. My aunt
has been staying here for over 3 years now
though. Anyway, I should start making my way
back home now”
..
Kemi wondered to herself when they got so
comfortable to the extent of family talk, they
had only met once afterall.
..
Uzor then asked her “Do you stay around here
too?”
..
Kemi replied “oh yes, I stay at number 17. My
husband is at home; would you like to meet
him?”
..
Uzor replied incoherently “Yes, why not”?
..
Kemi and Uzor got into the car, and Kemi
directed him to her house.
–
When they entered into the gate, they found BK,
Nnamdi and Martins gisting about how Chelsea
was so invincible at the moment.
–
BK boasts “The most annoying thing about this
case is that people say Chelsea play negative and ugly football when compared to Arsenal and Barcelona but you people forget Arsenal is the
easiest team that Chelsea can encounter in
the EPL”
..
Martins replied “I agree with BK, it’s only
Chelsea that can give Barcelona a run for their
money in England”
..
Nnamdi refused, “We were cheated in the last
match, Gary Cahill deserved a red card that wasn't given,
and moreover Fabregas is a sellout, crazy idiot!”
..
Kemi and Uzor walk towards the arguing bunch
she introduced Uzor to her other tenants
starting from martin.
..
This is my husband,Martins, he’s a lawyer
***uzor gives martins a strong handshake**
–
This is BK, my neighbour at the BQ **Uzor
shakes BK**
–
This is Nnamdi, my neighbour upstairs, he’s an
investment banker **shakes Nnamdi**
–
Everyone meet Uzor, he’s my customer at the
bank, we just bumped into each other up street,
Uzor started to feel uneasy and then said “Thank
you all, its a pleasure meeting you all, but I
really need to be on my way”, but BK replied
“Uzor, what’s the rush now? What club do you
support? “
–
Uzor replied “Am a Man Utd person, but I really
need to leave now, am already late for an
appointment”.
–
They all said goodbye to Uzor in unison, while
Martins and Kemi saw him off to his car just
outside their gate, Uzor reversed his car and
zoomed off.
–
Martins asked, “How was the Gym today, hope
the aerobics instructor is off flirting with you”?
..
Kemi laughed it off saying “Gym was good today
but I think I overstretched myself on the
treadmill, I’m having waist pains now, and to
answer your question, he was never flirting with
me, I was the one admiring his perfectly
trimmed buttocks”
..
Martins started running after Kemi in the
compound, screaming for her to leave the
house, screaming “I want my dowry back o,
thank God it isn’t too far, I will take 70% of my
dowry back”
..
Nnamdi and BK laughed hysterically at the young
couple, Vivian screamed from the kitchen
upstairs that she’s in with martins; she said
“Martins, my junior sister just came back from
the U.K, she works with SBJ, and we will be
willing to take 50% of the 70% of Kemi’s dowry
refund”.
..
Kemi replied “We Yoruba’s don’t accept dowry
moreover, my father doesn’t allow divorce”
..
Rita and Ify continued running behind Martins as
he chases Kemi around the cars, Martins got
exhausted after a short while trying to breath,
Martins was running out of air.
Nnamdi called Rita & Ify that they needed to
stop running now. While Vivian called them all
that breakfast was ready, Nnamdi invited
everyone for breakfast. BK in his usual behavior
asked what they’re having for breakfast; Vivian
replied from the kitchen window “Jollof rice”.
BK moves swiftly to the staircase as soon as he
heard Jollof Rice, Martins approached Nnamdi
and said in low tones “I would have loved to say
no but” he increased his voice in other for
everyone in the compound to hear “my dear wife
has refused to cook for me this Saturday
morning and instead chose to run off to a gym,
and brought home Boris Kidjoe to introduce as
her customer”.
Nnamdi smiled while shaking his head, everyone
joined Nnamdi & Vivian for Saturday morning
breakfast, all the while at the table, Martins
couldn’t get his mind off Uzor…..

17 AWOSIKA EPISODE 4: Next morning, BK ran to Nnamdi’s car as he was
about to leave for work, and he called out
“Nnamdi, wait a minute!”
Nnamdi looked up and saw BK running down from
the BQ to the parking lot in front of the house,
he asked Nnamdi,
“I need to set up a corporate account, my father
thinks he can help me secure a small contract in
abuja to supply 30-50 pieces of the New iPhone 6 for
the Ministry of Information, I need your help”
Nnamdi replied “Well, good for you, come by my
office later on today and I can introduce you to
someone who can settle it for you, have you
incorporated the company yet”?
BK replied “No, not yet, but I can do an express
one, I have a solid connect”
Nnamdi replied “Alright then, let me know when
you’re on your way to my office”
BK replied “Thanks Bruv, by the way, that’s a
nice wristwatch, looks like a Rolex”
Nnamdi replied “Oh yes, it is, a vintage one at
that”
BK replies “This definitely wasn’t bought in
Naija , this is a vintage western piece of
Engineering”
Nnamdi replied “I bought it in the U.K while I was
doing my Masters before we gave birth to Rita”
BK “Nice, your wife also told me about your
globetrotting”
Nnamdi “Yes, I travelled to quite some places
even in the middle east but not a gist for now, I
have to run along now”
BK replied “Have a good day”.
Morris Chukwu walks out of the office of the
Vice President, picked up his cell phones and
other things he was holding before he stepped in
to meet the vice president, walked out of the
building into his black 2012 Mercedes Benz
C‑class, and ordered his driver to take him back
to Sheraton hotels at Zone 4. He stepped out
and headed to his hotel room, he changed into a
dark blue suit with a white shirt; Morris is dark,
with athletic build, 6’4 in height, very
intimidating stature and a brutally serious look.
He proceeded back downstairs to his car.
Morris drove out to the outskirt of Abuja, Kubwa
to be precise. He drove to what looked like an
abandoned warehouse, with a huge expanse of
land. The warehouse alone sat on 3 acres of
land out of the 6 acres, built towards the end of
the land; the whole land was totally shielded
from sunlight, with thick roofing. Morris stepped
out of his car, with the classic 3pm Abuja sun,
positioned right in front of the imposing gate of
the warehouse, he picked out a strange key and
moved towards a little gate, flipped over a little
compartment and puts in the key, and rotated it
clockwise twice and anti-clockwise once and
pushed it in, the steel door made a strange
creak sound; this facility hasn’t been used in
years, he pushed the door and all he could see
was darkness despite the time of the day, he
picked out his torch and moved to the left to
the change-over point and pulled it down. The
fluorescent bulbs began to come alive from the
beginning of the space to down the hall, coming
up in sequence from the left to the right and the
center, he walks forward for a few seconds
again, he still could not get into the main
facility, so he dusted the security door access
panel and inputs, the systems were still booting
up.
Morris looked around the building, gigantic
space, sealed with high security glass, they had
been shut down years before they could start
their operations, the systems were fairly new,
their first mission was to assassinate everyone
that worked on building this place and equipped
it with gadgets and advanced security system,
the President had always said this department
was a waste of money, now Morris has gotten
his chance to prove they’re worthy of been
funded, EFCC, ICPC, JTF and the Army were
jokers compared to them.
The security had finished booting, it beeped 5
times, and more lights came up but this time
around, they were all sorts of lights, green, blue,
racks of servers coming back to life, Morris
moved to the keypad and types in 788376289,
the system accredited him and the screen
displayed
“Welcome Morris Chukwu ” and underneath his
name, it read “Nigerian S.S.S Special Ops “.
Morris entered and walked around the facility
and then to his office and picked up his Iridium
9505A Satphone and called a certain contact on
the phone called “Bernard Ejiofor”.

EPISODE 3 CONTD: Rita apologized while Eno approached the
bedroom, “The school bus is here, Oga”
Vivian pulled out Rita from the duvet and
instructed them to go with Eno and put on their
school sandals.
Vivian told the girls “Be good at school, be
obedient and always remember I love you, I
don’t know about your father.”
Nnamdi cut in, girls come and give daddy a big
fat hug, the girls ran to him and hugged his
thighs, okay girls, I love you more than your
mother loves you!
The girls screamed in unison “We love you too,
daddy” and ran to Eno.
Eno helped them put on their sandals, and their
backpacks and she carried their lunch packs and
headed to the door to take them to the school
bus.
Nnamdi rushed in for a kiss but Vivian stopped
him, “Nnamdi, please you need to leave the
house now, you’re almost late for work jare,
naughty man. She smacked his ass as he grabbed
his jacket from the wardrobe to head out.
Nnamdi stepped out to the staircase, he met
Martins & Kemi as they approached their car
heading to work, they both worked on the
island, martins usually dropped Kemi off at her
office somewhere along Awolowo road before
going to his own office at Ligali Ayorinde.
Martins had a 10am meeting with the senior
associates and their clients, an oil servicing firm,
martins arrived at the office some minutes after
9.
Wole, a close office friend of Martins screamed
at him “Dude, you’re late again and I know
you’re one of the Dr. Okoro’s favorites, one day
this your attitude of coming late will come back
and bite you right in the ass”
Martins smiled and replied” Good morning to you
too, Wole. How’s our wife and the pregnancy? “
Wole replied “Mehn, its crazy o, this madam is
almost in her 3rd trimester, have been paying
hospital bills and she’s been watching some
crazy series, she’s saying she might have CS
instead of labor, Faith City is about to give me
heart attack with their bills”
Martins replied “Ogbeni, I don’t envy you at all, I
and Kemi aren’t ready for children yet (he knew
he was lying to Wole, (conception had always
been an issue even while they were dating) so
who are these people we’re expecting from the
oil servicing firm?”
Wole replied “they’re a new firm, they’re from
the states and we need to set up some legal
structure and guide them about how the
Nigerian oil industry works…upstream and
downstream”
Martins replied “blah blah blah, spare me all the
grammar abeg, how many of them are coming
in”
Wole replied “Dude, what’s your problem sef,
your eye just dey chook anyhow, meanwhile
they’re 3 coming in, 2 white guys and one
african American lady, I don’t think she’s
Nigerian”
Martins replied “Now, you’re talking jare, what’s
the name of the babe?”
Wole interjected “How am I supposed to know? I
get winch?”
Martins “Let me go and see my Doctor Okoro”.
Dr. Okoro S.A.N was a man in his late fifties,
bald, short, skinny but randy as hell, he made
sure that all new female lawyers went through
him during the interview stage. He even had
accommodation somewhere after lekki phase 1
where he called the slaughterhouse, a fully
serviced mini-flat, Dr. Okoro was a vast lawyer
with expertise in litigation, Energy sector and
Corporate Finance hence him being a Partner at
the firm, he bagged his Doctorate from Harvard
in 1998, he was made S.A.N in 2004, blessed
with 3 kids and a hot socialite woman.
Doctor’s office had an expansive space with a
view of Lagos from the 13th floor, Doctor loved
gadgetry, iPads’, Android phones, Bluetooth
receivers and all on a huge mahogany table.
Martins “Good morning Doctor”
Dr. Okoro “Good morning Martins, how’s the
family, I hope you’re prepared for this morning’s
meeting, they will be in by 10am”
Martins “Yes Doctor, Conference room C has
been set up for the meeting”
Dr. Okoro “Good Martins, very good! Let me
know when they come in, okay? Good work on
that Mergers and Acquisition Paper for the
International Law Office, we’re proud of you”
Martins “Thank you, sir”
Martins settled in at his desk, he opened up his
P.C, logged onto the company’s desktop,
everything looked fine.
A call came through the intercom, its Wole
“Martins, the Oil servicing firm people are here
o, call Doctor and meet me at Conference room
C, okay? Nkem and I are already there.”
Martins rushed down to Doctor’s office to
inform him and they made their way down to the
conference room C.
A big fat white man stood up to introduce his
people to everyone, he proceeded by saying
“Hello everyone, I am Ryan Lloyds, the Chief
Operating Officer while this is Carl Daniels,
Senior Analyst, pointing to a tall good looking
man, looking like he just stepped out of GQ,
martins sent wole an IM saying
“Carl is definitely gay, his dressing is too on
point, Nkem hasn’t stopped looking at him
since”
Wole replied “Ahan see bad belle o, he’s married
with kids in Seattle o, na beef go kill you “
Ryan continued, as he introduced the female on
their entourage, he continued and this is Miss
Tinuke Ajayi, she’s our HR person, may we meet
your team?
Martins began to wonder, I have heard Tinuke
Ajayi before, I know one Tinuke Ajayi, his mind
running around places trying to figure out where
he knew her from.
Doctor introduced his team of Wole, Martins,
Nkem and himself, the meeting proceeded and
everyone exchanged card’s with Tinuke who
promised to make a call later on today to
confirm other details.
The day was fast spent and Martins closed from
work and drove to awolowo road to pick his wife
to head home, they both talked about how their
day went, with Kemi complaining about how her
boss was breathing down her neck and Martins
said he couldn’t remember where he knew a
client from. They zoomed away and just as they
were home trying to get some sleep when a call
came into Martins’ phone.
Martins “Hello, good evening, who am I speaking
with”
Caller ” Hello stranger, this is Tinuke Ajayi”
Martins “Hello Tinuke, please can you call me
tomorrow, it’s already after 9, have a good
night rest”
Tinuke “Martins, you don’t remember me?”
Martins “Tinuke, am sorry but I don’t, can you
help me”
Tinuke “Wow, this is so sad, this is Tinuke from
your secondary school, we dated when we were
in S.S.2″
Martins “Oh my Goodness, tinuke, am so sorry I
dint remember you, you were dark, your boobs
were small, you had fat nose”
Tinuke cuts in “I know, I had a beauty make-
over, and this is the new me “
Martins “Am still trying to recover from this
shock, tinuke, am so happy you’re back, but I’m
married now”
Tinuke “We need to talk, let me know when
you’re free, okay ?”
Martins “Am sure we have a lot to catch up on”
Tinuke “Yes, and remember before my father
took me out of school, I missed my period and
my father whisked me away to America”
Martins “Yes, its all coming back to me, yes, I
remember, the period later came back right?”
Tinuke “Nope, I did a minature abortion, but got
married to a Canadian, then divorced him 3 years
down the line and got the custody of my boy, he
really loved me but he wasn’t a good bedmate , I
hear you’re married”
Martins replied “You have a son? That’s nice and
you aborted my baby? I can’t complain now, we
were just 17 years old then, am married to
someone else now”
Tinuke “So, how come you weren’t wearing a
wedding ring then”
Martins “If my wife doesn’t complain, who are
you to complain? Martins laughed
They both laughed together and then Tinuke
asked “Do you wanna hook up, remember how
we used to make out everywhere in my father’s
house”
Memories start to flood into Martins’ head; he
replied from oblivion “Yes, I do. Can I call you
tomorrow to talk more”?
Tinuke replied “That’s fine, have a good night
rest”
Martins replied “Good night, sleep tight”.
Kemi threw a harmless question at Martins “So,
how is it that, that you were both discussing
who’s married, and who’s not and periods and
all that; so you actually impregnated someone in
secondary school? “
Martins replied “An old acquaintance and also a
client at the office but that was years ago”
Kemi replied with a long sigh “Ok o!!!”
Martins ignored her and slept off.

mariamferanmi:
LoLs am on my way hope ders is enof popcorn sha!!

popcorn? did I just hear you say popcorn? Come on hon, we don't take popcorn. Hope you can manage fried Chicken and orange juice

I really want you guys to take proper notice of the opening episodes of this story as it aims to give an insight into the life of the characters.
17 AWOSIKA EPISODE 3: So, fast forward to 3 months
later, Seye has travelled, BK’s dad paid up his
blackmail promise, he bought his 2010 tokunbo
Honda civic.
Vivian woke up a bit late today, but Eno had
everything in motion. She had prepared cereal
for the kids and toasts in their lunch pack, she
made tea and kept it warm in the jug; knowing
Nnamdi wasn’t big on breakfast eased off Eno’s
cooking troubles in the morning but for madam
vivian, everything depended on what side of bed
she woke up from. This morning she wasn’t up
yet which wass actually unlike her, she was
always up by 5:30am.
Vivian struggled out of bed at 7am and started
her panic attack while Nnamdi knotted his red tie
over his white shirt.
Vivian asked “Babez, why didn’t you wake me up
as soon as you were up?”
Nnamdi replied “Honey, you snored half the
night, if I were you, I wouldn’t be surprised if
BK, Martins and Kemi greeted you strangely this
morning, it got so loud that it sounded like
there was a train passing behind the house, what
did you do yesterday?”
Vivian replied “Nnamdi, you exaggerate a lot, you
were also snoring because I woke up in the night
to pee and you were making so much noise I felt
like suffocating you with the pillow but then
again, who would take care of me and my kids.
Moreover, am way too young and sexy to be a
widow”
Nnamdi giggled “Okay, I was the one snoring;
you can’t imagine how much paper work Femi
made me do, at times I wonder if that’s all what
investment banking is about, so much
documentation. By the way are you in the mood
for some early morning fooling around?”
Vivian replied” if you really wanted to fool
around, you would have woken me up 5am, you
know am a big fan of early morning $ex”
Nnamdi moved in for a booty spank, when Rita
and Ify came screaming into the room, Rita ran
to the bed directly beside her mother, and
buried herself under the duvet.
Ify started” Daddy, Rita broke my doll’s hand, I
was dressing her up for school this morning”
Ify intensified her cry, Nnamdi replied “Rita, is it
true what you did to your sister’s toy?”
Vivian tapped the duvet where Rita was hiding,
“Rita, your daddy is talking to you”
Rita replied sheepishly “Daddy, it wasn’t on
purpose, she brought it to me that the doll’s
hand was twisted, I was helping her twist it back
in place when it broke off. Moreover, she isn’t a
baby anymore!”
Vivian replied “Rita, you should have apologized
to your sister ehn?”
Rita fired back “She wouldn’t allow me, she ran
into your room”
Nnamdi said gently “Rita, Ify is your baby sister
and will always be, okay? It is how you treat her
that everyone around you will treat her, is that
clear?”

A GOOD MORNING TO YOU ALL. As you go to church today, may the Lord answer all your prayers. Have a wonderful Sunday.
17 Awosika Episode 3: Kemi is about to close but then her
line manager calls her that a
customer is having issues with his
account, so she needs to come
downstairs to talk to the man, Mr.
Uzoma is a new generation igbo
man, good-looking, probably 6ft 2
tall, light atlethic build, very
charming. Kemi was staring at his
lips when her subconscious woke her
up that she is married, as Kemi was
listening to Uzo, she found herself,
hiding her hand with the wedding
band, this was the first time,she was
feeling strange when talking to a
man, she was lost in thought when
Uzo tapped her by the hand, she
jumped out of her thought but
managed to say “Oh yes, Mr Uzor,
Let me get on that for you”.
Kemi is sensing trouble as it seems
Uzor is also flirting silently with her,
her subconscious kept screaming
“Martins will kill you” while she licks
her lips in front of Uzo and heads
down the hall..... this is just something for the morning. another update coming in the next 3 hours

Fatalveli:
Alaye chill jare, wetin gan! U no call guy make him come sit by ur side since morwin, na only girls u dey call! Na how many sides u get self *lolz

lolz.... y I go call guy come sit for my side? Ogbeni, calm down make God use you o

mariamferanmi:
Weldone handie, e remain small make I miss dis interesting story ooo. Dis thread is lively n interactive I love dat, whr everybody dey drag wentin no belong to them. Lols *laffing*

Welcome to the family dearie. Abeg come sit down for my side

iphie17:
Dx one evrybdy jx dey drag partner nawah oooo....*.since I no get make I quitely sit at d extreme end* 9c job @handie

. Noooo, I no fit allow you to sit alone. so, u go sit one side, Hameenat go sit for d oda side

Hameenat94:
which scores we wan settle... Who even tell u say Labaski na ur own? Abeg make Labaski choose by herself... Buh I prefer Handie side though cos of some favours*winks*

Hameenat, come dey my side jare..... I go dey show you the story before I update am

GRAB THE MOMENTS AS THEY COME. LIFE IS TOO SHORT AND DOESN'T DESERVE THE STRESS. #LIVE,LAUGH,LOVE.
17 AWOSIKA CONTD: I replied “Daddy now! Okay, I wanted
to play nice but you don’t, do u
remember at Ikoyi club, like 6 weeks
ago, that you and Chief Are were
having a meeting in that coded
room, I saw you and that girl winks,
she was sucking your dick under the
table, you and chief Are were having
a meeting while girls were d.....ick under the table, how do
you old people manage that sef,
she’s my mate you know”
He leans forward from the chair,
getting angry and whispering
“Bukunmi, how did you find out, plus
it was Chief Are that organized the
girls, everything was his idea,
everything ungodly”
I cut him short “Daddy, am not
interested in knowing how the girls
got there, mummy will hear all these
your escapades and I will be sure to
include that unilag girl that keeps
coming to your office at unholy
hours”
He cuts in “Bukunmi, shattap! She
isn’t ur mate, she is 26 and you’re
25, I will talk to Seye, but it’s still
with him to make up his mind, I
should do a DNA test to find out if
you’re truly mine”
I replied “Thanks Dad, your secret is
safe with me, one more request”
He cuts in “Bukunmi, you’re still not
done blackmailing your father? What
has this world turn into? ”
“Daddy, I want to change my car, I
can sell this one for 700k, but I need
like another 800 to 900 to buy the
new one.”
He cuts in “Bukunmi, shey I should
have sent you abroad,now I have to
pay for everything, get a regular job
like your brother and stop been a
parasite”
I replied ” Daddy!!!!! Mummy doesn’t
have to know o, whatever happens
at Ikoyi club stays there ”
He replied “Okay, I can give u 800k
next week”
Lastly Daddy, you need to stop
calling me Bukunmi and switch to BK
like everyone else.
He screamed “Is that all? Get out!!!”
I proceeded to my way out, speaking
to myself ; BK! Blady blackmailer, it
worked sha, now to go pleadingly to
Seye abt his car, that Seye guy no
go gree. Good thing I bargained a
new car or atlas tokunbo with daddy.
This friday definitely is looking
fantastic, its 6:30, lemme call this
mofo Niran, (Niran is my good friend,
we met in the university) let’s know
what’s going down tonight and
where.
Phone rings
Niran : hello, madman
BK : Baboon, how u dey? How na,
wetin dey happen today? Those lag
babes that wanted us to take them
out nko, na you get their controls
na.
Niran: Ogbeni, I no no jare, plus say I
no get money and dose girls dey look
for who go pop champagne for
them, dem fit go plenty, na like 6
girls o!
BK: 6 girls ke? Na orgy we wan
do? na just friday nite make we all
jolly na, simple, no anyting mega jo,
buh my own car go carry 3
depending on their size.
Niran : I know jo, but ur car suppose
fit carry 4 girls for back na, ur car na
maxima na, e dey spacious die
BK : You join money with me when I
wan buy the car? You don take your
drugs this evening so, bloody
idiot…..lolllz, u wan spoil my
shocks
Niran: You be fool o, instead make u
just talk say your shocks no good, u
com dey insult your guy! Ask Seye
for hin car na?
BK: Seye will rather sit on a hot coal
the whole night than gimme his
Range to take out, knowing fully well
that we’re going clubbing and we go
high come house!
Niran : Sha lemme know what ever
happens by 9pm, how abt sharon na,
Seye’s gf, saw her at rehab last
friday. Am I still moving in with you
when Seye travels?
BK: We will talk later about the
accomodation thing, if you wan do
Aproko, call me! Ehn, no use my
credit do am, moreover she was
there with Seye, bloody home
wrecker! Get out of my phone jo…
lolllz later bruv! Cheers
Now the problem is borrowing Seye’s
car tonight and asking him to leave
his properties for me when he’s
about to move abroad which is lesser
than a month away.
Heading back to Seye’s house, I just
hope Sharon isn’t with him yet.

9 Things You didn’t know About Omonieme "Handie" Andrew (Junior)
1. Handie is the first Nigerian to walk on the
moon.
2. When NEPA takes light, Handie brings it
back.
3. Handie can make a U-Turn on 3rd Mainland
bridge
4. Handie once competed and finished first in 3
different marathons in 3 different Nigerian
states on the same day.
5. Handie assisted the doctors in his own
delivery.
6.Handie can neither confirm nor deny that he
was once the CIA, FBI, SSS, and Interpol’s most
deadly assassin.
7. Handie won the elections. All of them.
8. Handie was born too old for this shit.
9. Handie is the voice of Optimus Prime.

Mention:
*Gives her a Peck*
Oya do your worst!

*in a tearful voice* una dey see Mention so o. he don dey peck her for my presence o.... I go report you to our pastor for church

labaski:
i no even know wetin wan happen again sef..it is well it is well it is well it is well

btw, wen next are u gonna update handie?

This evening by God's grace

Fatalveli:
Lols! Dis is not a matter of conspiracy, I and labaski are meant to be together afterall, isn't it darling...

Ehen! It's squeaky bum time *in Randy Orton's voice* labaski, enough of all this coyness. oya come and choose one seatmate.... after she don choose, y'all should respect her decision o

tescoleps:
I'm gud o. I've been 'ghosting' all dis while. I bind and cast all d spirit of dark corner... *running back to ghost mode*

Well, I just wanted to test you. Na me and labaski jor. go back to your ghost mood..... but just know say, very soon, all the ghosts shall be pursued and eradicated from this thread. Mention, do u agree?

Mention:
I thought we agreed that it was gonna be me??
She seats by my side or else??

or else what? see, u no fit do anything. na me dey here, na me get am

labaski:
..am blushing rainbow colours

dont mind him,

hmmmmm. i'm sensing a conspiracy.... na so una dey talk if una wan switch camp o

tescoleps:
Bukunmi's old man sef is very funny. Following.....

Aww! Tescoleps darling, how far na? it's been awhile o.... hope you've been good. Me missed you plenty sha. Abeg labaski u fit go one corner. tescoleps is my new seatmate jare.... abeg tescoleps make we go that dark corner for back jare

kayemjay:
I'm feeling you bro. I swear.

Keep it up.

what else can I do than dance skelewu, shoki and alanta together? thanks BOSS

Fatalveli:
*held the other hand along with ur waist and begun twisting and rolling it... Dis gal sabi dance pass kaffy ooo

FATALVELI! E be like say this thread don tire u ba? Who know Fatalveli better warn am now o. He's going tooo far

17 Awosika Episode 2(Abuja connect) I am not a big fan of 9 to 5 work, so i made
some kind of arrangement for myself, i sell
laptops, do office supplies, sell phones, all this
is just to keep me busy, most of my main cash
come from blackmailing my father
As for me, I got into this house like a year ago,
my folks are well to do but as a good for
nothing boy that I am, as soon as I finished
serving in delta state, early 2010. I dint want to
have anything to do with my folks anymore
asides collecting money from them , I opted to
stay with my big brother Seye, he’s a security
expert, as I.T security o, not S.S.S o, he’s a
confirmed big boy, he was using a the lastest
Range Rover sport, but he’s relocating abroad
for reasons I dint think were substantial enough,
this mofo of my bro earns in dollars and it pays
very well, he would actually earn a lil bit higher
than he earns in Nigeria but he has made up his
mind to leave sha, as a great manipulator that I
am, he was putting every thing in his house for
sale, I ran to my father to help me talk to his
son to leave everything so I can continue to use
his properties, so anytime he comes into the
country, he can stay in the place rather than go
to a hotel, meanwhile I dint mean the whole
having somewhere to stay.
My father blatantly said “No, Bukunmi! Your
brother worked his way up, he didn’t need my
help and you know my policy! You must gather
your own properties through your sweat, Get
out of my sight, lazy boy”
Why is this man para-ing for me nah, must we all
suffer? even Goodluck said he didn’t have shoes
as a child, abegi, all that na story, now nko, isn’t
he riding around with entourage, i no wan hear
am jo, I quite understand that he had to go to
school in tattered clothes, but times are
different now, there is no use going to my
mother, she will redirect me back to this man
again, they both have this intercom in their
head, that they use in communicating…… If all
else fails, Blackmail will not.
I always wonder why my father can be so difficult
abt this ‘small’ issue sef…ahan…. Does he have
more than 2 children, me and my brother
Well, I no too trust this man, light bulb come to
think of it, I saw this man receiving a head at
Ikoyi club na, why am I dulling sef, Seye’s
properties must be mine at least the house with
the furnitures evil grin
I went back to meet him where he was watching
his tennis match, the man no no say him don
old, he still plays tennis, for me, am fit, I love
running commentary as usual during sports. He’s
already commending “This Djokovich guy is a
natural winner”
I replied “Daddy, I need to speak with you”
He replied “I have a feeling I shouldn’t listen to
you, the devil is speaking through you today and
as a Deacon in church, I should ask you to flee
away from me.”
I replied “Why won’t you listen to your own son,
your last born for that matter, all this you’ve
built, isn’t it for us to continue your legacy”
He screams “Bukunmi, am adjusting my will, as
soon as I die, you should be given N10M, thats
all, your brother will lead the company, however,
if you succeed in killing your brother, the
company will go public, the company will pay you
salary, no director benefit for you! because I
have a feeling, you will singlehandedly wreck my
company and everything I have worked for all
these years, all the legal work has been done”
I replied ” Daddy, calm down na, I know u’re
joking, I can forward your resume to Zeb Ejiro or
Lancelot Imasuen or even Emem Isong, so they
can give you a role as husband to Patience
Ozorkwo, una fit each other, laughing”
He smiles ” Okay, what’s the problem, and for
the sake of God, let it not be that you’re trying
to inherit Seye alive because I will tell him, so he
can alert the appropriate authorities,SSS, FBI,
CIA, MOSSAD, AL-QEADA, EFCC, we might have
an incoming murder case”..... Have a blessed weekend ladies and gentlemen

labaski:
omo ds one n GOBE o..abeg handie, invite all d females wey dey d previous thread make dem come here so dat girls go dey enuf for d guys wey dey here..in ds case na 1 female vs plenty fierce men ooo.. and i no wan die young.. biko..

oya. As my right hand lady, I delegate to you the power to invite every invitable lady..... BTW, where's Hameenat94?

Labaski is causing a commotion here. To avert crises, I as the CEO of this thread in collaboration with the director of operations @ Mention has decided to evict Labaski from the thread unless she comes and seat by my side. THIS IS THE VERDICT! No appeals allowed

SMALLPENIS:
oya come sit down with Alhaji Hassim

why sit with a criminal? Abeg come and sit with Chike jare... Ogbeni Hassim, Labaski is not the material type of gal

[quote author=labaski post=27040687]abeg my guys make una no vex say i leave u cnc monin..i been write one exam today.... Ideally, I suppose ask how the exam but I no go ask cause I know say the exam go well. Best of luck dearie