₦airaland Forum

Tominix:
Evening vibes___ smash or pass

You try bro. But shey you know that as soon as this lockdown is over, WAEC go start immediately No break at all. No time again o... go and read! War wey dem don announce no dey meet cripple for gate oo...



By the way, yes I'll go with smash... no way i wont smash that head against the wall behind it

nwakibe:
I want to prepare jeaulof rice, should I put rice?

To prepare Jollof rice, below is a list of ingredients needed:

1.5g powdered milk
4kg shea butter (the one Yoruba call ori)
3kg melted margarine
5pcs cane sugar
4pcs of sweet potatoes
12pcs of okra
3sachets of cockroach wings
4litres coconut oil
6pcs of bell pepper
32inch long spring onion
4pcs bulb onion
1bulb of Garlic
3pcs of ginger
10kg of flour


Should I drop the method of preparation too??

I swear, omor... this shit boost my headphone like mad.. my fake headphone come dey gimme bass effect like beat by dre headphone...

Nice one op. Thank you

Hahahaha... lwtmb mehn...


This religious fanatics are really hilarious to the core. Corona is 666? Lawd!!! I'm so weak af


Wait o... so, if you receive vaccine for corona you have gotten the "Mark of the beast"

Small time, some 'pastors' will start preaching this, and their members will refusing to be cured of the virus when they contact it, and will rather die of it than get treated. And soon, the death rates will increase, all because one lunatic on the loose decided to spread nonsense gist... nawa for my country o

Nairaland vaseline crew will be so envious of this guy right now.

But true o... if he's dead, how did they know?
Did he write dairy or what??

Enh, i get am before no be property na...

I used to be beautiful ni, no be say I am beautiful.

But mommy, this picture I'm seeing, is like you didn't upload the correct picture oo... Maybe she's beautiful in other pictures and she wasn't photogenic enough when they shot that pic up there

Please has this guy credited anyone's phone?
If he has, please someone should tell me, and if no one, then I have a special prayer for people like this... it doesn't cost much to pray for a brother now, does it?

The way people jump on giveaway threads now enh... Not anybody's fault tho...


But op, it's not okay that you think coming out on a public forum and making a fool of people's conditions is cool... it's not okay at all...

If you wanna give, please do so. And if you don't have to give, please with all due respect I ever gathered, kindly shut the Bleep up and sit your ass one place!!!!


Playing people like this in this desperate times isn't cool at all...


God no go shame any one of us here o...

Nigerians are so wonderfuuu mehn... fantastic! I'm flabbergasted

Seriosuly, Nigeria is a mess. We've become the laughing stock of the whole world just because of a useless fellow we call our president, who has decided not to let the people know of his whereabouts.

What baffles me the most is that some fanatics... no lunatics out here are still in support of that miscreant we call our president.

It's official now. He lied about his test results. Dude is positive, but released a report that he's negative. I mean, who is he deceiving but himself


God! I feel so ashamed to be a Nigerian at this moment.

After all this ordeal (which I know will pass), I expect Nigerians to rise up and drastically take control of our land out of the hands of this vagabond we call a president, even if it's violently, we need to arise and do something about our situation.

Meanwhile, stay indoors and safe this period. God be with us all and provide for His children. And may we never get to the stage of people beginning to die of hunger and lack. Amen!

Humanoid01:
Lol how did she react when she discovered?

she didn't care. She was indifferent. She even insisted she was only trying to protect what is hers and said she didn't trust me...


Although the trust issue wasn't her fault sha... I already had a bad reputation in school then with the girls.

You know how school politicians are na... with power and fame, girls come around and resisting isn't so easy

jumpampass:
Karma is right behind you...will soon catch up with you. No worry ohh!!

bros, wetin concern karma for this matter now na


Monkey dey sleep, yanga go wake am... which one be karma again?

How karma take concern this talk abeg bro... I need understand please

DaddyRochie1642:
Are you sure the woman in your room that time was really your "Elder Sister"

she was man... and it was so embarrassing and awkward��

Your friend wey carry herself to the hotel to be 'raped' no get work


Your friend wey get time to text you while in the middle of a 'rape' session no get work


You wey carry the matter come table before responsible ladies and gents on Nairaland forum no get work pass...


Nawa for you oo... Person text you say dem dey rape am, you no reason am well, you come dey disturb innocent people here say make we go help her... Guy, your mumu no too much like this

Abi you want us to go and join and make it a gang rape?:/

Dreiwizzy:
Don't fret, I'm trying to ease this Corobaby tension from you guys.

Me? Fret?? God forbid fret things...
I know you're just trying to ease the tension, and ooin, you're doing well...


Nothing eases tension like a smile or a good laugh... keep it up brother..



God no go shame us

Story story?

Once upon a time??


My first time too was with an ashi... It was freakn boring mehn...


I waited till I was 18 before I even had the mind of having s3x (I have this funny perfectionist thing that makes me wanna do things the right way and at the right time, although I doubt that was a right way, but whatever sha) I sha waited till I was a legal age to have sex. So, I stroll to this pot near my school then, empire at Yaba (ifyouknowyouknow) as I was approaching, many aunties were calling me "fine boy, come na" "I go do you well" etc. I just spotted one that was still kinda young and closer to my age than all those mummies and aunties I was seeing with sagged b00bs and ass. This one still had standing b..bs n a55.
Down to business. We agreed N500 and she took me to her room.

Now I wasn't a novice or a good boy. I've been watching porn ever since I can remember (Thanks to phones and the internet) And I knew all about sex, but damn! I was nervous. I mean, this is the real deal man. I was gonna smash.
The room suddenly became hot and stuffy. She took off the little piece of material she wore as 'clothes' (which was a see-through lacy bra n bumshot made majorly with net). I was still looking at her, admiring the beauty of God's wonderful creature. Mind you, my d1ck wasn't responding cos it wasn't New in my eyes, as porn had spoilt my mind already before now. So she asks me "comot cloth na! Abu you wan Bleep with cloth?" I shyly removed my shirt first and hung on the hanger in her room. Started removing my trouser so slowly, then she said "na your first time be this?" I nodded a yes and she laughed and said "No worry, I go teach you" she came forward, removed my boxer and started playing with my flaccid stick. Within minutes, it was rock hard. Wore a CD for me and lay on the bed and said "shey you sabi where you go put am na?"

I answered that question practically. No need for talk. I started pounding away. I was expecting a sweet sensation cos of all I've heard about how sweet sex was. But I felt nothing. I swear, there was no difference between that and when I used my hands. I plunged and hammered and was sweating but damn, I just wouldn't spew my seed. I got tired of moving my waist and she got tired of laying there so she urged me to touch her boobs maybe it will help bring out my seed, cos she said she had other customers to attend to that night and I needed to hurry.

I played with her bobbi, for where? I no still cvm. Nna me I don tire o... She now said I should add another 500 so that she can give me a Mouth Gig so i will cum. I agreed, and she started working my stick with her mouth. Her mouth was way more sensational than her kitty, walahi. I was already in cloud nine within minutes, rubbing and playing with her boobs as she sucked me to a glorious release, and within few minutes, I spewed into the CD and she stood up, collected her extra 500 and bade me farewell with a smile...

*THE END*

Story story??

One upon a time


One time I was dating a girl who talks too much. I mean a walking radio that doesn't know when to keep shut. And babe had mad insecurities too, but her pussy was so sweet it kept me going through the period we dated.



The day I knew her insecurities had gotten the better part of her head was the day she walked into my room in school then, saw me talking with a girl, and concluded she had a competition. Next thing she came, sat on my leg and was forcing me to kiss her. Just so that the girl will know who she is... like booking her space or marking territory.


Turns out the girl in question was my elder sister... Jeez! It was fuckn embarrassing mehn... my sis was just like "who is that frog? See how she's jumping upandan doing bebescout like mumu".


And then her mouth wey no get control. Shit! Then in school, I was actively into students politics and held a post as president of one of the social clubs on campus... Omor, this girl nearly used her mouth to remove me from office o...


The day I broke up with her wasn't easy o... We first had sex, then I broke up, then we had sex again... We were hooked on each other. Two days later, she came crying and asking to get back together. Made all promises to change and all. I couldn't resist her perfume so we bleeped again twice, then slept till night, woke up at past 11 in the night, bleeped again, and then I made it clear that I really wasn't doing again, then she got the message, and l told her to leave my room that night and go back to her hostel. It was crazy but a mans gotta do what a mans gotta do... and besides, my new babe was visiting me and passing the night, and I didn't need any disturbance...

Chai! Memories��

Keketu, so you still went ahead to use that vegetable I told you to stay away from in my room....


How do you want me to tell you it's not ugwu and you will understand??

I don't think Nigerians can ever take any matter serious... we'll always find a way to play, even with the most serious matters... Chai! My beloved country

Lemme join this thread... But mine is a sad story sha



This babe liked me and knew I liked her too, so one day, we were alone and she came and sat on my leg and started rubbing my chest, so I took it as an invite and kissed her, but lo and behold, she didn't respond. She instead drew away and shamed me for doing that. Eventually turned me to a brother because we're from the same state

Anyways, that's by the way sha. Just wanted to let that off my chest cos I've been pained since then and I want to forgive her and not teach her a lesson for doing that to me


Lemme face the real talk. This one happened recently sha:


This babe that I don't know from Adam, just chats me up on facebook and says she knows me very well, down to where I work. She even said she sees me whenever I'm going to work and coming back. That I always pass so so road. I'm like okay... so I have a stalker? Good!

We keep chatting and after a good chat, I tell her I'm bout to sleep, so we say goodnight and next thing, this girl I don't know from anywhere before goes "I love you"... omor, I changed it for her that instant o... I told her I hate to hear that word love and that she should never use that word when talking to me again. She started apologising and all.


Well, she's still on my matter till now sha

CLOSED!!

Words are used to express ones feelings

Words are used to express ones feelings

Salvation is free, but you must buy bible

Lol

KaideeGee:
Male or female bestie?

Just my thought

very vital question there... male or female bestie


E get why