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Ibkayee's Posts

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FamilyRe: How Will You Handle A ❤️-CHILD In Your Marriage? by ibkayee(f): 4:40pm On May 21, 2020
Gaggi:
That's not the issue. Better women than you have faced such challenges and have accepted it as one of those things. What irritates the shit out of me is when singles talk about marriage. I've been there and I realise I was actually foolish talking about things I didn't understand.
Lol you don't actually know any concrete information about me or most of the people here so you're working with assumptions at best.

Also, there are a lot of factors to consider when discussing marriage challenges and the way people deal with them, things are often situational/individual dependant and subjective so this is a pretty simplistic way of thinking. One of those things ko lol
FamilyRe: How Will You Handle A ❤️-CHILD In Your Marriage? by ibkayee(f): 4:31pm On May 21, 2020
KanwuliaExtra:
And are way more expressive of their emotions.✔️
I agree that women are more encouraged to be expressive with their emotions.

By the way, I had a typo, it should have been 'Women handle pain better than men', not 'more', just to clarify smiley

Whenever they say women handle pain better, they're usually trying to say it stings women less 'naturally'. They're aware of the pain it can cause, but they use it to justify the impact on men vs women cheating.

First of all it can be argued that no matter how much we are raised to accept/process certain things, a natural emotional response oftentimes outweighs the 'logic' forced upon us, even if your feelings are masked..or 'rationalized' in your 'own way', you still feel it.

Secondly, not everyone is the same, so it's impractical to paint all women with this brush. Same way not all men that cheat do it solely because of physical desire, it can be emotional too, and vice versa for women. At the end of the day, it still hurts the same way, but they know this, it's all mental gymnastics
FamilyRe: How Will You Handle A ❤️-CHILD In Your Marriage? by ibkayee(f): 3:42pm On May 21, 2020
ericsmith:
[s] Other facts as "women are weaker vessels" or "emotional being" how doez it discredit the main fact that women handle pain better than men.
we are talking of creatures that bleed for seven days n still stay up,weaker vessel indeed ...how many men can stand menstra cramp not to talk of pains that comes with child birth.
The most powerful man can defend himself physically buh when love n emotion strikes he falls yakata, vice versa when it comes to women.
Therefore, a man needs protection from emotional strikes just as much as a woman need more protection from physical strikes,my opinion [/s]
Stop using this myth to make yourselves feel better about doing the very same thing most of you admit you can't handle.

'Women handle pain better than men', what does that even mean? Are we inherently predisposed to handling emotional/mental pain more than men? How come this only applies when you want to justify cheating? cheesy

Women do not naturally feel any less hurt than a man would. They're just raised to accept it more.

The menstrual example is just...ridiculous lol

Just do your cheating and go, without all the mental gymnastics to justify it and make yourselves feel better
TV/MoviesRe: What Movie Are You Watching Now? by ibkayee(f): 3:29pm On May 21, 2020
Liposure:
no. Am just reacting 2 ur disappointment. Meanwhile, Recommend any good naija flick 2 me
From the top of my head, these movies range from good to watchable (they're not in order). For NIGERIAN standards o. I wish I could recommend some 'older generation' movies, but I can't remember any of their titles lol

King of boys
Quagmire
Tiwa's baggage
Rough patches (started off well, then got weak towards the end in my opinion, you could tell it was rushed)
Maybe Mine
In sickness and health
Last flight to Abuja (I recall this being decent-ish)
Desperate Housegirls (a TV series, not movie, I recall it being watchable)
Gidi Up (Nadni TV series)
Skinny girl in transit (Ndani TV series, I've only watched the first few seasons though)

Again, NIGERIAN standards o. On average, a Nollywood 10 to me is like a Hollywood 5
FamilyRe: Why Do Nigerian Women Endure Abuses In Marriage? by ibkayee(f): 3:24pm On May 21, 2020
Ijawwomaninoyo:
The same people will call you Olosho that wants to go into full time business and add the number of men you have married as a prefix to your name.
There's no winning cheesy
FamilyRe: Why Do Nigerian Women Endure Abuses In Marriage? by ibkayee(f): 3:08pm On May 21, 2020
Lots of different reasons, here are some common ones

- Guilted/shamed into doing suffer head under the guise of tradition, religion etc
- Conflicting emotions (e.g. stockholm syndrome) etc
- Financial dependency on their husbands/financial insecurity
- Threatened by their partner
- Would rather tolerate someone familiar/a toxic environment than start afresh, especially in a marriage obsessed society and a justice system that has a history of failing them
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 3:04pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
Okay...
Mum is oyibo ?
No she is Nigerian
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 2:42pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
Ooooops, okay, which part of yoruba are you from? smiley
Dad is from Oyo
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 2:39pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
Oh my bad. I get it now.

You should visit Ilesa(how did you know such a place exist?)once in a while.
I've heard of the place, never been there though and I don't know if I have any ties there either
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 2:32pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
So probably, IBK moved when she was little or undergraduate years?
Moved where?

Lol I said I was born here (UK)
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 2:20pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
If I may ask...at what age did you relocate there?
I was born here
TV/MoviesRe: What Movie Are You Watching Now? by ibkayee(f): 2:07pm On May 21, 2020
Liposure:
yeh!
You've watched it?
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 2:03pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
Okay thanks. So you mean, you can speak Yoruba?
Barely, very basic
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 2:01pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
Awwwn cry cry

I can hear it o. Just that the speaking part is what I'm working on. Don't turn me off okay sad
Lol no worries, don't mind me
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 1:57pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
My sisters all learnt it. But I don't know what's wrong with my brain when it comes to learn local dialects cry
That's a shame, I actually find it a big turn on when a guy can speak Yoruba cheesy
Music/RadioRe: What Music Are You Listening To Right Now? by ibkayee(f): 1:57pm On May 21, 2020

RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 1:54pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
No see, this part of Lagos is Yoruba-deep deep
Ah ok fair enough
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 1:48pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
Yes, how did you know that?
Lool when you said you were raised in a Yoruba town I thought it would be somewhere like Ilesa or something, not cosmopolitan Lagos grin
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 1:41pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
I was born in a Yoruba town. Born and bred. Until my college years.

Yoruba women bath me when I was very little. Since then, I had a thing for them.

Well, basically because they're very courteous and full of manners. I know things are changing sha.

So so so grin
What, Lagos?
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 1:37pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
Oh I remember "ekun-le" more like "-welcome" What do I know? grin

Have I told you I'm Yoruba kinda? By association
No you didn't, what kind of association?
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 1:31pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
Ibukun, I think it means peace or joy.

Can't place a finger on it.
Ibikunle - ‘the one given birth to has filled the house’ literally
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 1:25pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
I'm not Yoruba but I know the answer to that.

That's easy, 10/100.

Oh I see, your name is IBK?
Yup it is IBK
FamilyRe: How Will You Handle A ❤️-CHILD In Your Marriage? by ibkayee(f):
Gaggi:
Come and quote me when you are at least 5 years in a real marriage. It's pointless arguing with singles about marriage.
No one can really know what they’d do in the moment unless they’re actually faced with the situation, true. What we did know however was that comments like yours were inevitable, you clearly came to antagonise so even if someone truly wouldn’t/didn’t accept a cheat, it wouldn’t matter. I’m not even necessarily looking for the comments to stop, it was just a funny observation (to me) and I genuinely was impressed lol
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 1:02pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
Can you form it? I want to check sometin
‘Ba wo ni’
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 12:58pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
Meaning, you can't speak your language? Mother'so tongue or father's tongue?
I’m not fluent but I can form basic sentences. I understand it more than I can speak it though
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 12:54pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
But you're in Nigeria right?
Nope
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 12:50pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
Lol ok. Will you atleast tell me where you're from?

Remember you promised to chat here with me, first?
I’m a British Nigerian, so I’m ethnically/semi-culturally Nigerian but I am technically ‘from’ the UK
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 12:41pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
It's a chatting app, better than whatsapp.
No thanks dear
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 12:38pm On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
Nothing dear. How bout Telegram?
What’s telegram?
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 11:53am On May 21, 2020
emusmithyy:
Thank you "X" ? shocked
huh
Music/RadioRe: What Music Are You Listening To Right Now? by ibkayee(f): 11:51am On May 21, 2020

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TZ9IXScip68

Bojack season 5 brought me here
RomanceRe: 3 Things Women Do When They Are Cheating by ibkayee(f): 10:13am On May 21, 2020
pocohantas:
Felt like chatting with a bot, but then, I have no pity for the recipient. grin
grin

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