₦airaland Forum

Hausa:
that wasnt a python then

it was a python brother. Pythons are not born 20 meters long, they grow.

bi0nics:
Meter?? seriously?

yeah, a meter. I still got the pic in my library. I cud mail it to u if u want evidence. My first strike was the best. I hit the head at the first shot. Am good. I always wear my rubber boots before any confrontation. I got my goggles n a glove just in case it tried to constrict me lol. I was damn ready for the browny that morning. Thank God I did drink the previous night.
I usually use a thin timber about 5cm in diameter. I use it on my rake n I can easily pull it out for emergency strike. Lovely spike at the edge for spearing any stalker who comes too close lol.

midolian:
He is satisfied with the "over 1million northern child voters". If you have any problem with it, why not go on a trekking protest like this pained jobless student? Let your voice be heard, bro. Protest the "over 1million northern child voters" and make a fool of urself big time.

thank u tell him.
Tho I support this nonviolent move. Trekking is a protest measure that we must embrace as changed Nigerians. Anyone with grievances can now express them n the media sud give full coverage. And I call on Buhari to appreciate the trekkers. It sud be a welcome development for us. Pipelines vandalism can be thwarted to pipeline trekking protest.

Ajinoride:
if u are Reilly a christian, u won't be saying all these. u have a partial understanding of who Christ is. the same problem the Jews had with Him. they expected Jesus to live like John the Baptist, who lived in the wilderness...
Jesus' garment was too expensive and will lose value if torn into pieces. that was why they had to cast lot on it.
go and study the prophesies and the live of Jesus christ. it will help u a lot. thanks

am only trying to make u c that the Bible scholars who brot the Bible to us are poor n serving humanity while Nigerian pastors are the richest in the world. Does it ring a bell Where is the wealth from? Where r they taking it to? Wake up! Church is big business in Nigeria

17 with such heavy makeups? She doesn't look 17 indeed

Emnyte:
They pray 4 poor people almost everyday, but 2 pray 4 those that leads d poor 2 lead them aright once in a while is still a sin. u hypocrites watch ur own back.

if u pray for poor ppl ALL THE TIME n the prayers are not working then the prayers aren't getting to God. Even Jesus himself did not try to change the whole world for he said his kingdom is no part of this world. And you are trying to pray for the ruler of the nation
John 12:31 Living Translation
The time for judging this world has come, when Satan, the ruler of this world, will be cast out.
1 John 5:19 English Standard Version
We know that we are from God, and the whole world lies in the power of the evil one.

Read what the Bible says. Now you are going to pray for the world. Aren't u contradicting the Bible? The world is ruled by Satan and you are going to pray for Satan. When God says he will destroy him. Salvation is a personal race. Nobody can save u. Nobody can pray for you, but yourself.
◄ Matthew 6:6
New International Version
But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.
I've seen countries where atheist act better than Christians. We use christianity to feel better than others. Nigerian pastors always halla prayer n prayer n prayer, but prayer without works is meaningless. When u pray then ur conducts sud prove it.

Ajinoride:
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itis very glaring that u know next to nothing about Jesus. do u know the status of men like Mathew,Zachaeus, Joseph of Arimatea?. learn to confer before open your gutter against a man of God. ... guess u are clueless too

is obvious that u have been all washed up from toe nails to the helm of ur hair. That man is a human being who visits the looo like everyone else n will kpoof like everyone else too. I can't revere a man who breathes like me. I read my Bible n I understand wella. Am well-educated n I c clearly. U can't fool me with words. Jesus said the son of man had no place to lay his head, but our men of God have mansions upon estates. Jesus had no Camel, but our men of god have classy fleets n private jets. Jesus said u will be persecuted in my name but our men of god are famous, revered and invited to socialite's functions, even to dine with presidents. Jesus showed a lesson in humility by washing feet of his apostles, our men of god can't even shake poor men in the church.
I'm not perfect but am saying with what I see am confused. This is contrary to the Bible. U can't fool me with English here I can read n understand. We r called Christians cos we are christ-like (be like Christ). Now how was Christ? Compare his life n the lives of his disciples to our modern day men of god. Compare the way Jesus conducted his teaching at the sermon to the teaching of these men of god. Jesus was a SON of god, these ones are MEN not children o, MEN of god. Do ur math and gain some knowledge.

Ajinoride:
.
wealthy and high profile men in the society. and Zacharias was even a renowned questionable character.until he met Jesus

I dont think u no what u r saying. now count the twelve apostles n tell me which was a president. Jesus met Caesar, the governor and was he outspoken to him or not? Mark 12:17 - And Jesus said unto them, Render unto Caesar...
God is not a politician n any man of god meddling with politics is fake. Leave Caesar for Caesar. Adeboye sud have voiced out his opinions on national issues at the heat of heats. Praying for a president is bullshit. No one fools me with church. So many fuckeen churches in the country n evil keeps abounding. Back in the early 80ies we didn't have so much churches n there were morals. We r only asked to pray when behind our closed eyes they share the coins. Keep fooling ursef n instead of revering God in heaven u revere a fellow man like you. To me salvation is a personal race. I've seen many acclaimed men of god end in shame. I'm a Christian n I refuse to worship man like me. I repeat, he sud go and pray for his members. My relatives works for the church
N she tells me the politics that thrive in the church. I attended his ministration at one of the parishes in Lagos some years back n he's so overrated. Taar make I c road. I go fear dog, fear dog sheet again

crixtex:
Wen will ds Men of God learn sef?? I wonder how God will b looking at us.. u cant giv wats holy to dogs, dey will always turn bk and rent u up.. Why not ask d members of d church to pray for d country? Instead of praying for ds pple y not preach to dem to repent and warn them about Hell fire just like d apostles or d Men of old did in d bible? Imagine praying for Buhari who doesnt believe in Jesus or Jonathan who is a compromiser? Men of God, pls stop deceiving pple, tell dem exactly wat d bible says.......

I truly don't c how grown ups wud fall for gimmicks. Isn't it interfaith for Adeboye to pray for a Muslim, Buhari? Matthew 6:24 "No one can serve two masters. Luke 16:13 "No one can serve two masters. Is shameful how ppl who sud be speaking the truth become tools for money? Marthin Luther king was a reverend, but he was very outspoken n vocal to the plights of the black ppl. Mbaka outspokenly questioned GEJ over his lousiness in protecting the citizens. These men of god are licking the president's arss. How dare u go to pray for a Muslim? Jesus overturned tables of gamblers n money changers. These politicians are changing money. Gambling with our national sustenance n lives. Yet, instead of an influential person to use his influence to condemn evil perpetrators he is seeking them out. I don't understand this Christianity we practice in Africa o

Ajinoride:
its very glaring u don't know anything about the Jesus. do u know the status of people like Matthew,zachaeus, Joseph of Arimatea? learn to ponder before opening your gutter against a man of God. ......... guess u are clueless too.

tell me the statutes I would like to know. Let's be adults don't get combative just now

I love ur positive conclusion. Let's hope our hopes don't end in hopes. Buhari Nigerians are as never before counting on someone and its u

ferhyntorlah:
Of course. YES, I agree with him. Who doesn't knows Nigeria is RICH and her citizens poor?

In the 80s, one of my mom's colleagues travelled to the Netherlands for a course. Anytime she was asked where she came from and she replied NIGERIA, they would say "Oh that RICH African country that lacks management; oh that rich African country that lacks administration." When she got tired of hearing this, she stopped answering questions about her country of origin. That was in the 80s; so you can imagine the situation on ground now-worse!

So you see, the country is RICH but lacked good administrators and managers. Thank GOD the era of mismanagement will soon be over.

Nigerians have been sleeping to issues pertaining to good governance and holding public office holders accountable but now, the tides have change thanks to the SOCIAL MEDIA.

Na the eleventh wife born this one? Oga I know your pikin way go school for swiss o. Don't fool us o some of us day see far o. Anyways, congrats young man!!!!

benedictac:
your stypidity doesn't have part 2

part one begin in you. Go n hide ur disvirgined face in the cupboard. We don't need it here

No be APC flag one guy hold for there?

delishpot:
Shame

big one

cool318:
And they Preserved it. Nature conservation & protection only in European countries. If it was in Africa- Nigeria, it will be served to the entire village. smh!!!

tho herpotologist claim pythons don't have venoms and r not harmful, I won't take any chance at all. For me, I've seen too many snakes that I can't tell the difference between venomous n non venomous snakes. The best defense is kill the snake n stay alive. I can buy their eggs, hatch em n replenish the planet later lol. Is either I kill it or it runs away. I've killed so many snakes in the past.

walemoney007:
u killd a phyton dat is as big as dat?wetin u use kill am?

not a big one o. The one i killed was about 1 meter

I'll tackle it the way Indonesia tackles drugs

sinaj:
lolz vewi funi...
I wonder wot de will put as the cause of his death
perhaps dat he died in the course of service

haha he died on duty na. I pity the girls not the man. For a sec sch girl to feel OK to lay with her granny

Oh k. E never set e don start for warri. Area I hail. Chairmo I no need remind u say politics na dirty game. Before you put ur head enter make u no say politics fit cut am comot for the body.
Chairmo if you kpoof for there Buhari no go compensate ur family o. Na only ur burial few ppl go attend. Anyway, chairmo we go day wait to welcome u back. If not, help us greet Abiola

I saw one at 5am around my house back in
2012 and I killed it. But, some neighbors almost called the cops, so I lied I found it dead right there lol. Tho they r lovely creatures, but I hate snakes.

killerman47:
i really wonder the way supposed adults behave, u didn't even bother to at least help with the answers i requested after your English tutorials..... anyway thanks all thesame, but this tutorial of yours wasn't at the least needed by me....

appreciate what u get for free.
I would recommend Q10. Longer ba3 power, bigger screen than Q5. Good camera quality (u can video n take shots same time. It has keypad as opposed to Z10 touchscreen

Twaci:
Lolz! Very funny! Nice one, keep them coming
Kindly vote me for Miss. Nairaland 2015. Thanks .

what is the prize for being miss nairaland?

Poor ppl r in ur church. Pray for dem first. Leave politicians alone. Jesus said he came for the lowly ones. Ppl r waiting at ur office right now to c u. Those are the ones u sud attend to. That's what Jesus did. They made u rich n famous not the president n top men u r going to pray for.

OP dont feel insulted, but i feel u need to refresh ur mind on Superlative comparative adjectives. Comparing two items only your adjective wud of been right but in this context it is wrong. U cud of used "best" in place of "better"

Is that all? that's nothing!!!!!! Even an unknown striker has almost all of that. Next time don't waste my time, pls

Buhari is this change or balance?

Setaje:
I bet if she was light skinned, u won't see her as ugly.

I bet u I love chocolatey skin. I grew up with very light/mixed skins all around me. But even in a white skin that girl is outstanding

Denrele don't do this yet. U need more attention b4 the wedding. Simply do something really naughty to gain wider coverage during the wedding.

Y stealing my jokes? Originality is an open game. Try to play it

guyANDROID1:
As every Jick and Harry are trekking to congratulate both Losers and winners of the last election. I also want to trek from Lagos to London to congratulate our own Nigerians who won MP's in the last UK election.

I only need 2 partners to join me.. One to carry the cameras and the other one to always post on social media.

You can identify yourself if you're interested to join me.

Wish me Goodluck guys.

#SeasonsOfTrek.

coolhamid:
SLS takes the Emir of a thing so serious...
This guy should be managing our finance in this country and not sitting on a Throne in kano ..
He is an asset


I believe he would be Useful as a Finance Minister than being an Emir of Kano.

Am dedicating this space to my wife who is in NYSC camp presently...
I miss her no be small and the three weeks camp be like three years for my eyes...



Coolhamid

u for put her name na make she no in save she day come nairaland. Abi u no want make she no ur username to avoid traffic jam?