₦airaland Forum

taryour: my God am loving this.

@op. Let me teach wot works for my family. Eact time my hubby is mad at me, i simply keep qiute,listen to him,say less,pretend am not angry,at d end i apologise even it am not wrong. All d while i was quite i was takin good note of all d complains so i dont repeat them. I cant stand my hubby anger so dats wot ido,i predend am not angry cos i also av a bad temper,now imnagine i reply or argue wen he is angry n corecting me,ofcourse he will get more angry more n my own added to it will simply bring down d roof on my head and i will eventualy get more bitter. If dis should go on in a marriage will destroy d love n peace i dat home. So i av learnt to keep quite,listen,takenote of his point,pretend am not angry.
Ater his anger must av gone down,he is more relaxed after a warm bath,i serve him his meal. After eating i bring up a joke or we plane our ps2 together, while d joke is on i simply in a very humble n respectable way ask him " baby dont u thgink u were to harsh on me wen u were angry ?" while i say this,i watch out for d expression on his face,if i read any signs of anger coming up again,i keep quite n change topic. D rest will b solved inside d bedroom on our bed as usual. Some times i dont even raise d issue untill he goes out,then ui invite him for a chat were we iron it out online cos we chat alot. We as women could make our man apologise to us even if they did not ofend us. I can proudly say since i got married,i an never shouted ,argue,talk back e,t.c at my hubby n it as realy help me. D onky pple dat feelk my anger are those outside my home.

This is exactly the same way my woman handles such issues! You two must be twins! At the end of the day, I always apologize because I see that she is hurt by my comments or rage but I also see that she gets the point I was trying to pass across.

Women, once you can be like this woman above. You'll enjoy your relationship because after your husband shouts or whatever, he will have a re-think and apologize (if you deserve an apology or he was too harsh) and try not to hurt you again (at least you'll see the effort on his part). Women, take note. This is the way you handle your husband and before you know it, you'll be in control because you are the neck and the neck ALWAYS turns the head!

Thirty-three states and the Federal Capital Territory (FCT) are united in their opposition to more cash for Lagos, Kano and River states in the proposed Revenue Formula, it was learnt yesterday.

The three states are being considered for a larger share of the national revenue because of their high-yielding Internally Generated Revenue (IGR) profile.

But, the 33 states and the FCT are insisting on the present formula for the sharing of the IGR.

The sharing formula for the 10 per cent IGR by the states is equality (7.5 per cent) and efforts (2.5 per cent).

The Revenue Mobilisation Allocation and Fiscal Commission(RMAFC) is weighing the options on how best to resolve the matter.

The IGR is one of the five principles being applied to revenue sharing among the states with a 10 per cent weight attached to it.

Investigation showed that although most states want more revenue, they do not want the IGR shared based on their performance.

A source, who spoke in confidence, said: “The states (like Lagos , Rivers and Kano ) that are doing well in revenue generation are also insisting that each state should be rewarded by what it generates internally.

“Most of the 33 states, which are rated as “rural” are opposed to performance as the basis for sharing the 10 per cent IGR. I think they want to be protected by states with huge revenue base.

“So, even among the states, there is a subtle cold war over how the IGR should be managed or shared. It is a scenario that RMAFC is confronted with.

“It has been difficult to reconcile these two positions over the years. But with the latest field work being done by RMAFC, the commission will weigh all the indices.

“All the states and 774 local government areas also have opportunity to air their views on this matter. RMAFC will consult extensively on this new revenue allocation formula.”

An RMAFC memo obtained by The Nation gives graphic details of the conflict among the states and local government areas on IGR.

The memo also suggested that RMAFC may look at the issue, which is causing friction among the states.

The document reads: “As members may be aware, Internally Generated Revenue (IGR) is one of the factors used on the Horizontal Revenue Formula which is the formula used in sharing revenue amongst the states and Local Government Areas. The weight assigned to the IGR factor is 10 per cent of the Federation Account.

“The factor was introduced sometime in 1991 and the idea it was to encourage and reward States and Local Governments that look inwards in terms of their financial needs instead of relying mainly on the monthly allocations from the Federation Account.

“When the factor was first applied in 1991, the Commission used absolute quantum of IGR by States and Local Governments as proxy in allocating revenue under the factor. “This approach was greeted with protests from most of the states as Lagos, Rivers and Kano States were taking more than 50 per cent of the total allocation under IGR.

“Based on the protests, Decree 102 of 1992 (now Act) introduced ‘internal revenue effort’ as the proxy to be applied instead of using the absolute quantum of IGR. That approach too was found to be lopsided as States with smaller revenue base were benefiting much more than those with larger revenue base and capacities.

“Specifically, the ‘rural States’ were getting twice the allocation of states like Lagos , Kano and Rivers states .

“After using the two extremes, the military government at that time had to find a middle ground in solving the problem. Consequently, it directed that the 10 per cent be divided into two parts namely; equality (7.5 per cent) and efforts (2.5 per cent) and applied in allocating revenue under the factor. Since then the Commission has been using equality and efforts in all its Indices reviews.

“However, members may also wish to be informed that after the 2006 Indices review, the Commission received several complaints from States and Local Governments arguing that the Commission was actually rewarding equality and not IGR efforts as originally intended in the Act.

“The Commission in Plenary, after studying the complaints, agreed that in all subsequent reviews the entire 10 per cent be applied, using internal revenue effort.

“This decision may not solve the problem because the states with lower revenue base and capacities are still going to get more allocation under the factor than those with larger revenue base and capacities.

“For example, if Ebonyi State can generate N1.5 billion this year, it will be easier for the state to double the figure next year to N3 billion and get 100 per cent effort than for Lagos State to double its N20 billion naira to N40 billion the following year. Perhaps Lagos State might end up getting 20 per cent effort, thereby putting it at a disadvantageous position. At any rate, the law is very clear and the Commission should be seen to be acting in accordance with the law.

“However, the Commission may consider this issue in the ongoing process of reviewing the Revenue Allocation Formula.”

http://www.thenationonlineng.net/2011/index.php/news/44343-33-states-oppose-more-cash-for-lagos-rivers-kano.html

Torch1: Alj Uche Jason Harem, is this thread about Igbos?
Why are you so obsessed about Igbos?
Is your tribe inferior to Igbo tribe?
You are a full blooded Awori man a Lagosian and a Kanuri man from Borno state, you once claim to be an Igbo(Alj Uche) from Anambra state, in your other moniker(Jason123) you are Urhobo abi na Itsekiri... You are everything you will soon claim to come from Krypton...Lolz!
Go get a life chap!

Torch1: You are acting well by talking to yourself all in d name of decieving some gullible NLers.

I can see you are not well! Its ONLY A MAD MAN THAT TALKS TO HIMSELF! I have already dismissed your brother Johndeo100 on this thread yesternight!
Discerning minds on NL have stopped equating me to alhaji but if you can't . . .well, its your prerogative!

https://www.nairaland.com/921476/does-he-really-love-me/1#10676132

OP, you should represent you people more on NL! You don't have to partake in the tribal bashing but you need to speak up if people like Alhaji harem and Beaf are saying incorrect things about your people! Peace!

Johndoe100: Who is "this guy"? You mean her husband?



Boy aren't they primitive? Imagine believing the bible, how African can you get.

Johndeo100, I am glad you are here. So, tell me, I could I have been chatting with myself in the politics section yet, type this down. SMH! Dude, you are/were simply paranoid.

Johndoe100: First, the idea that the Sahara reporters guy is the credible source for your history is the most sychopantic thing you have said yet. Please when you want to qoute history why don't you get a REAL source.

I see you having a conversation with your other ID, Alh haram. Boy you is messed up. You are fooling no one.

God bless you!

Ahlaji, thanks for your words!

Outstrip: I am trying joor. That poster just wanted to awaken the beast. I am saving my energy for my crazy schedule. I try to come here and chill and he/she decided to provoke me

Oustrip, I'm not here to provoke you. The truth is ALWAYS a bitter pill to swallow, hence, your provocation.

You sound like a married woman. When you and your husband have arguments, do you not try to prevent the cause next time? Or do you keep doing the same thing that provokes your husband to an argument?

OP, most of these women do not follow the advise they give people here. If they did, that would be the explanation for the high rate of divorce and cheating in Nigeria.

If he listens to you (by taking care of your needs) why don't you listen to him?? If you don't endevour to make him happy, why did he even marry you in the first place. Please mind my bluntness but the way we men think is different. If you can't make your husband happy by doing his likes and not doing his dislikes, then, YOU ARE A LIABILITY TO HIM even though he loves you! After all, he does his best to make you happy!

Agreed, violence and sending you packing is extreme but that was his defense mechanism before he does something he will live to regret!

Outstrip: Do you take correction when your wife talks to you. When you don't can she slap you around like the family's unwanted dog. Nonsense. You had to go throw God into your useless posts. Who is ruining the marraige the raging bull or the one who is being oppressed. Nonsense. Nigerians and their oppressive mentality. When it comes to suffering Nigerians are always proud to take first place. Wearing the badge of suffering with pride. Please just because you can settle for a life of suffering does not mean that you should inflict it on others. Which many other women will take her place? Yes of course. The ones that have also be indoctrinated by people like you. Stay married or die trying. Stay and endure. God is on the throne. God's time is the best. Tufiakwa. Please do not get me started today

Woman, I don't know why you are bitter but I have this to tell you.

First of all, my spouse corrects me whenever she sees something she does not like and I take to correction (though, not everything because somethings are what makes me a man. They are my character). She said I shout a lot when I get angry and I took it to heart and changed. I prayed about it with her and CHANGED! I only shout on an average of once every six months and that's if she really annoys me.

Look, in a relationship, the two (man and woman) should respect eachother and try to make eachother HAPPY! If the man does not like what she does, why does she not want to change? Is it until the man finds his happiness outside the home she will change? After all, the man does all his duties and makes sure she lacks NOTHING!

About the violence part, I have never beaten my spouse because my anger sends the message I want it to send. I also annoy her and she passes the message across in whichever way she deems appropriate! We (my woman and I) are PARTNERS!


I am a man, I know the feeling! The woman in question here (OP) does not take his rage serious and therefore, she thinks its okay to do whatever annoys him again and again and again!

What the man is going through is EMOTIONAL ABUSE! and when he could not take it anymore, he translated that to PHYSICAL ABUSE! He simply wanted his spouse to feel what he is going through! We men have emotions as well. When women do somethings, its painful but we take it up the chin and not talk but it does not mean we don't feel it!


OP, you better change your ways and take his correction to heart and I am sure he will NEVER touch you again. Be happy for your husband LOVES YOU DEEPLY (that is why he cares at all)! Please, try to love him back!

Johndoe100: A well jason, we all know that you wish you were Yoruba. Sadly you are not. No matter how much you lick their azzes. Just for the record I place zero credibility on the arant nonsense you post to suck up to the Yoruba.

Its not about sucking up but it remains the truth!

People, Omoyele Sowore is an Ijaw man. take it like that.

Let me tell you a bit about the Apoi people. Many centuries ago, the migrated from a place in Bayelsa state and finally settled in Toru-Abukuba ( now Sabomi - sound Ijawish I guess) in Ese-Odo LGA in Ondo State. The Royal family later moved to Oboro and founded other towns including Igbekebo, Kiribo (Sowore's town), Oju Ala, Igbotu, Igbobini, Inikorogha (sounds Ijawish too I guess) and others.
They settled close to the Ilajes, Ikales and the Ijebus who were Yoruba speaking, because of their lost stay together, they intermarried heavily and slowly they began to lost their original Ijaw language. Presently, the Apoi speak Yoruba (the Ikale dialect), they NO MORE speak Ijaw. Just before lately, they title of their king was even 'Oba" until recently when they returned their original "Kalasuwe" (Kalasuo or Kalasue) title.

Consequently, Sowore is an Apoi (of Ijaw ancestry). If you call him a Yoruba man fine (from his names), if you call him an Ijaw man, fine (from his roots).

I am an Apoi (from Oboro) too, a blue-blood one for that matter, so I know what I am talking.

In conclusion, considering that the Yorubas claimed to have migrated from Mecca (Makkah), can we still refer to them as Makkans? Can we also refer to the Lagosians as Edos? (since they actually came from Benin). On this premise, I will like to conclude that the Apoi people can be seen as "Apoi" people. Because of the language they speak and their geographical location, if they are called Yorubas, there shouldn't be any problem. But definitely they are NOT Igbo or Hausa.

https://www.nairaland.com/704736/omoyele-sowore-owner-sahara-reporters/2#10210651

That, up there, is an APOI IJAW! The owner of sahara reporters who you hate is an Apoi-Ijaw! So what is the "suck up" theory here? Cause I don't do blind followership? Leave that thing!

alj harem: abegi comot for road !!!

they are giving back in billions but your leaders are so corrupt, they steal from una.

Ibori, Alam, Emmanuel etc go figure

Alhaji, you should have known me by now. I try my human best not to take sides but the truth is even if some leaders have been taking these "compensations" on our behalf, it is the job of the companies to at least leave a POSITIVE LEGACY! That legacy cannot be found in Nigeria!

It's a shame that these foreign companies take our oil YET they leave without giving anything back to the communities the oil is form. Another contrast is, they might have given these communities some money(compensation) but the LEADERS of that community would have shared it among themselves leaving the poor to fend for themselves.

Such a sad world!

Desola: stupid girl! Ondo state, part of the Niger delta. Ole barawo banza! Illiterate morasucker oshi! Attache for brazillian weave. pshew!

Ondo state is part of the Niger-delta region, same with Imo and Abia.

https://nigeriamasterweb.com/Etc/NigerDeltaMapWhole1.jpg

Nice one Omotola! More of our actors should emulate this!

Johndoe100: You mangy cur, the oil in Ondo is in Yoruba land?

Yes, it is actually in Yoruba land. Arogbo and Apoi migrated to Yoruba land. In fact, the are inland when compared to Ilajes and Itsekiris in Ondo state!

Johndoe100: Forgive me, is one of the pillars of our human rights not the right to free speech? These people are simply enjoying that right. You don't have to agree with them.
Instead of complaining on NL, go stage your own march in favour of whatever you want.

You no talk this one for January! ROMFL! You guys eh!

The reason I am posting these links is because I want SEastern folks to bug theirs leaders until something is actually done! Thanks for your time!

[center]Benefits to the Collaborating States


The Summit will present to the 5 States in the Zone a Blue print for the rapid transformation of the bartered economy of the South East.

It will also create a forum for the governments of the 5 States to Strategize and synergize on common economic problems of the zone.

It will help the governments in the zone to fully discuss and comprehend the blueprint that will emerge from the summit and thereby facilitate its effective implementation.

To provide a strategic plan for redressing the grossly inadequate power supply in the zone by encouraging the establishment of independent power plants and the reactivation of Oji-River Thermal Station.

Call attention to the deplorable state of railways and road network in South East and propose action towards their amelioration.

Call attention to the need for expeditious action on the protracted issues of dry port, export free zone, dredging of River Niger and a second bridge over the Niger as critical success factors for the transformation of the South East Nigerian Economy.

Produce the strategic plan for raising a centralized power base that will promote and actualize the political and economic interests of the zone.
[/center]

http://southeasteconomicsummitgroup.org/benefits-to-collaborating-states.html

Eko-Ile, why must you always go down that route? C'mon, this is not the right place for that. (Abeg, no insult me o! I just dey talk my own)

Dem don start!

naptu2: Indeed! The governors could even get an investor to build the bridge and erect tolls. They'd make their money back in no time. Anyone who doesn't want to pay the toll can use the old Niger Bridge.

That is certainly the obvious solution!

Da infamous: I don't have a clue on that but i think it will serve from LAGOS,ASABA, ONITSHA,PH,ENUGU,IMO, abia,CALABAR,and some northern part......

Isn't that gonna be the national railway? From the video, the trains used are faster and modern. Secondly, I doubt if its gonna serve the "northern" part of the country.

Whatever way they do it, I believe the SE regional committee can take this on and actually do something. . . .at least, a bridge and railway to Asaba. Single states are building bridges these days; I wonder what is stopping them (take into account that 2 SE states are oil producing). We must not wait until the Niger-bridge collapses (God forbid!).

naptu2: This makes so much sense and it's sad to see several administrations promise this then fail to deliver.

Imagine a high speed rail link between Lagos and Enugu that'll also have stops in Benin, Asaba, Onitsha, etc.

A spot-on comment! You are fast becoming one of my favorite Nairalander!

About the high-speed rail way. It is the most obvious thing to do. Even the blind knows it.
I heard ACN governors are planning to build something similar although, it stops at Asaba (Delta state).
http://www.businessdayonline.com/NG/index.php/city-file/city-file/32663-old-western-region-to-construct-rail-line-from-lagos-to-asaba

Whichever way, it must be done. Imagine the amount of lives that will be saved along the Benin-ore road if we had this facility.

In my opinion, if the FG is wasting time, the SE regional committee should do it for their people! SE governors need to start taking up their people's aspirations.

To be completed 2015!

http://www.hpdi.com.cn:8005/Gen/FM/NewsShow.aspx?RID=F36EB81DDA4DC19D

-----------------------------------

I have this feeling that these politicians are using this bridge as a form of electoral candy! Is it until the Niger-bridge collapses and thousands of people die before they wake up to their responsibility Nigeria NEVER fails to disappoint!

Da infamous: that will lead you to SE states from other regions....................

What states? Anambra alone? Where does it start and terminate? Eg does it start at Anambra and terminate at Delta (Asaba)? Is there a map to show the master plan? The train route?

Please don't take this the wrong way as there is no malice in my questions.

Secondly, why can't the SE states do it themselves because waiting for the FG is futile. What do you think?

Da infamous, has the construction started? Do you have the master plan? From the video, I saw a railway line. Where does that lead to?

naptu2: The bridge lands at Admiralty Road (on the Lekki side). I wondered how they'll manage traffic at the junction between the bridge and Admiralty Road. They created a roundabout (traffic circle) so that traffic from the bridge can easily merge with traffic from Admiralty Road.

naptu2: The bridge lands at Admiralty Road (on the Lekki side). I wondered how they'll manage traffic at the junction between the bridge and Admiralty Road. They created a roundabout (traffic circle) so that traffic from the bridge can easily merge with traffic from Admiralty Road.

Thanks for the info!

Secondly Naput2, can you give a ROUGH estimate of the time its gonna take to commission it?

GAR3TH: Nice pictures Naptu2, thanks.

I added some of your photos here

http://www.skyscrapercity.com/showthread.php?p=90758408#post90758408

Was about asking you to update SSC! Nice one!

naptu2: I agree. In fact I think, in the past few weeks, they paid more attention to completing the roundabout on Admiralty Road than they did to completing the bridge.

I think the bridge will be commissioned pretty soon (if everything goes well).

Forgive my ignorance but what is this round about all about? Please can you explain? Thanks in advance!

Gbawe: My brother, thank you for these private pictures. This is what we ask Nigerians to do i.e be the extra arm of Goverment and check its excesses when necessary. If you had not taken time from your schedule to provide these pictures, some haters of Fashola (like edicolove) will be having a wonderful time saying there is no work ongoing on this bridge and that "Fashola has gone to sleep in his second term".

You talk of the man that hates the indigenous people in Lagos, just like that?! The man that wants to run Lagos by subjecting the indigenes? Make him catch you!