₦airaland Forum

GenIgrigi:
**grins** You all can pontificate from the highest mountain to the deepest ocean. Until you bring us Tinubu, IBB, ObJ and other hausa-fulani criminal, handcuff them and allow us to slaughter them by ourselves, you are joking. Treat your mega-thieves the way you will want to treat mine. Yes! That's is the reality on ground. An open bigot is in power, so we must be conservative too and ethnically sensitive before he kills us off. **grins**

I don't know the problem you people have with Tinubu. If GEJ couldn't prosecute Jagaban, why should Buhari do that? Your "hero" had the power to prosecute any suspected thief, however he chose to give Dasuki the sharing formula of how to distribute our yams.

melvinjames:
Ekwueme was kept in prison in 1985 while Shagari the president was put under house arrest. Same thing playing out all over again

So Dasuki is a yoruba man, right?

kamair237:
OP

better b thanking your God for sending savior Buhari

If u have problem with 8months of APC governance and u have no problem with 16 years of PDP, I can help ur situation.

Like PDP said they don't handcuff criminals

krendo:
Buhari will fail!
Nigerians should brace up for hardship
We will be purnished for not learning from history

And you think the failure of President Buhari is good for you, right?

To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II
In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.)
Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except North Dakota, which she does not fancy). Your new Prime Minister, David Cameron, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections.
Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect: ----------------------- 1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary'). ------------------------ 2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U.S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.' ------------------- 3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday. ----------------- 4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse. ---------------------- 5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public. ---------------------- 6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour. -------------------- 7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it. ------------------- 8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar. ------------------- 9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion. --------------------- 10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialect in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater. --------------------- 11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies). --------------------- 12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries. -------------------- 13.. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad. ----------------- 14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776). --------------- 15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season.
God Save the Queen!
PS: Only share this with friends who have a good sense of humour (NOT humor)!

Credit: Sahara Reporters.

Cc Lalasticlala

chidexxy007, Nadal is out o. Is it hamstring this time around?

Unseeded Fernando Verdasco upset 5th seed Rafael Nadal 7-6, 4-6, 3-6, 7-6, 6-2 in their 1st round clash at the Ausie.

Nadal fans, is he injured again?

chidexxy007:
are u kidding me? bad losers?. how?
wen fit has he had a season as bad as last year?
no matter hw u term it, fact is he was injury ravaged last season and that contributed to his poor outings in tournaments.

You don't get to know Rafa is injured until the end of the game. There's always an excuse to lose a match. At least, he claimed to be fit now, let's wait and see!

Kyrgios is through to 2nd Round defeating Carreno Busta in straight sets 6-2, 7-5, 6-2.

Another Women's seed out. No.22 #Petkovic falls to Russian #Kulichkova 7-5, 6-4.

Defending women's champion Serena Williams reached the second round of the Australian Open with a tense 6-4 7-5 win over Italian Camila Giorgi in her first tour match in four months.
Congratulations Queen Rena!

chidexxy007:
Nadal had injuries d beta part of last year. Hoping he stay healthy this time around..

Nadal and his supporters are bad losers. They always seek for excuses after horrible outing.

shadrach77:
This reminds me of Government College Ibadan during its heydays

I'm also an Old boy of G.C.I. I'm in Field house.

Witches are meant to be hunted!

Chiidi:
Futo beats these

Prove it to us by giving us the pictures!

Below are Alhaji Orezi's tweets as regards his views about the 2015 Headies

Pearlyakin:
Olamide don insult donjay on twitter.

Those tweets are mad!

Shoki.. Efejoku.. Is it because i love u.. Gbese.. All dance tracks with no real message or meaning. Reekado jor!!!!!!

Helkayklassic:
Reekado Banks is raw talent forget them hit maker. Apart from Don Jazzy he is the brain behind all Mavin crew hits. Dorobucci, Adaobi, Looku looku and a lot of collabos.

I like ur submission

Lovers of good music know that Reekado deserves this.

Reekado noni

I want Reekado to win the next rated, but doubt if people will vote merit

M.I

"We are not here for tea party, street ti take over"

Lo Lo Lo Lo!!!

Harrysong doing it on stage like it's nothing. The thing sure for am.

KATAPOT!

What a great performance!

Falz is a comedian!