EroticAngelina:
If u two love each other so much, then get married.
u never know what God can do

dre11:

Agatha, that statement, almost killed me
because I had been very faithful, loyal, very
open and sincere in the relationship. I
immediately packed his rings and sent them
to him. Some days ago he called but I refused
to take his calls. He then sent a text message
appealing we remain friends even though
things didn’t work out between us.
Please, I’m badly and deeply hurt because I have
never disappointed any man, so why did he have
to disappoint me at the very stage we were? I
need your help on how to get over this issue.

stillchris:


honestly, yes. i haven't had sex outside our relationship since we started doing it. she's a very lovely girl and that was why i had to open up to her. and due to her stance, we had to come to an agreement on when to engage so as to make it special for both of us.

stillchris:
that "post of the year" above is just kidding right? for Naija babes?

mind you, i have been in such relationship and i must say it taught me the greatest lessons about naija women. never ever fall into that trap of no sex in relationship.

na complete mugu go be your campaign slogan. after spending everything (both emotional and financial) on her, you still either go home and masturbatte or find a hooker or side chik to cure the konji you got from kissing and smoothing her. have you not cheated? so who's fooling who? and the worst is when she's not even a virgin.

my current relationship wanted to start like that until i spark for the babe sey i no dey do again. i told her i was cheating on her and cannot be that kinf of man, that we should just end it and be friends. nobody tell her to open am yakata for me. it even made love her more and gave me more confidence in the relationship and the bond has grown stonger than before we started having sex.

my point is.. for the girl to agree to be in the relationship in the first place, she should also be aware thatvit comea with a compromise. if she's not ready, then she should just friendzone the guy instead of punishing the poor sex starved konjilized boyfrend.

jnrprof:
Great post! at least a few nairalanders have their brain up in their heads.

Now i await the comments from those whose brains are somewhere between their legs

MzNelly:
This should be like the post of the year
I love this

Very informative

Ezegozie:
I am really asking because i think some Boy's are being used to achieve financial needs.

Take for instance, a student that is probably not going to marry in the next 5yrs.
And he is in a so called relationship that does not involve sex or any romantic activities.
But he spends on her, he takes her out and pay for her private needs.

Let me ask you officially

what do you gain from such a parasitic relationship ?


If you are not into sex, because of religious purpose, then why are you into a relationship?

Why not save the money and give to the orphanage and receive blessings, if you are so
religious?

And for the girls, If you are not ready for sex before marriage, why are you ready for demanding from your boyfriend before marriage?

CallMeBIRA:
Bros,you are mean ooo#chai

tainee:
I have been dating this sweet,responsible and caring man for six months now. He treats me like a queen and practically worships the ground i tread on.
My issue with him is that he is quite boring and uptight and I want to be with someone who is fun to be with, someone who makes me laugh all the time, someone who makes me feel like a lovestruck,doe-eyed little girl.
I dont want to break up with him because he has been very kind to me, I need him to do the breakup...i need ur advice. Thanks.

crazysaint:
some are quite true, some are rotten lies expecially that sex chat of a thing! I often call my girl when we are not closer to sex chat me on phone atleast to pour out my cum and God knows i luv this girl to pieces, i alwys touch her boobs, suck it like is my last day xo does it mean i dont have iota luv for her. Oh God be my witness i so luv that babe.

mizkeleke:
I was once dating this guy then we broke up two weeks into the relationship because I said no to sex.
Is sex really mandatory to keep a relationship

Sophyrocks:


The guy sef never answer your question o. Lol. You see how its soooo easy to advise others but very difficult to follow your own advice? that tells you that people hardly put themselves in the shoes of whomever they are advising.

EfemenaXY:



What do you mean by act otherwise? Why put conditions to your "emphatic" YES? I didn't see any of those conditions of yours whilst dishing out your fast, grin, and bear it advice to her.

As per the latter bit of your post, she didn't propose to him. He asked her to marry him. So how did she force herself on him?

Guy pls. You're misyarning again.

EfemenaXY:


That doesn't answer the question I asked you.

Jearile, would you remain in a "marriage" where your wife constantly emotionally abuses you, whilst actively playing the field?

Or would you suddenly remember scriptural verses that give you grounds for divorce where adultery is involved?

EfemenaXY:


I abhor guys who misyarn from both sides of the mouth!

Would you be saying this if the tables were turned? Where your wife openly tells you she's banging other guys to get pregnant, and has the effontry to call them up in your presence saying "I love you" whilst belittling you to them? Or tells you to watch p0rn with her because you as a man can't turn her on?

Would you still remember the analogy of what God has joined together let no man put asunder, knowing she's having unprotected sex with goodness knows who?

Guy, if you know you can't take an iota of this crap, then why should she? Because she's a woman? Because she's a lesser being?

Mtcheew.

EfemenaXY:


What do you mean "speak some sense into his head"? Does the man's request for a divorce sound unreasonable to you? Is he a confused child? Are you not aware that sometimes, it's best to stop flogging a dead horse? Why should she try to fix what doesn't want to be fixed?

aameyah:
I really appreciate your answers.

Her dad and mum are aware of some of his minor inadequacies. And her dad told her to count her losses and move on.
But what they are not aware of is all the major drama and all the insults.Because her dad washed his hands off the issue when she refused to listen. He started having his reservations right from when they started preparing for the wedding.

I think I have to talk to her to tell them. Maybe a family meeting is the way to go.

My friend is a good girl. Very hard working and all. She's also an excellent cook to booth and unlike most women who got married as virgins is very open with her husband sexually. If only he would approach her with love. I wouldn't call her frigid. How do you enjoy seks with a guy who doesn't touch your body during the act not even once. He doesn't kiss her. He doesn't caress her.
How do you enjoy watching intimacy with a stranger? When he plays it, they both sit apart watching silently. When finished, she undresses and bam, finish!

He stands up and leaves her. C'est finite.

When she cooks he eats and calls a girlfriend to tell her what he is eating. I don't know again ooh. Her parents I think are the best to be of assistance.

,

Julieee:
i had it first when i was 14, its very embarrassing but that's just the way it is. It was my elder brother's friend, i was so matured so he thought i had done it before. My parents did not know sha. such is life.

Maamin:


Life is too short these days, do you want to wait till they blow the trumpet? One can go to hell because of this stupidity u know

jearile: ...So if what's really driving/motivating you is indeed L 2d O 2d V n2d E and not just what seems to be it (it's either you are in love or with the idea of being in love)...

Givemejoy:
I met this guy through a mutual friend and we got talking. After a few weeks of chatting on BBM we had our first “real” date at an eatery around Surulere. He was well-spoken and the abreast of current global issues and, on top of that, he looked really cool. But there was something that turned me off … he had bad breath!!! I thought it was about something he ate but in the course of several other dates, I concluded he had “permanent” mouth odour and even foams at the sides of his mouth while talking. YUCK! We’re really into each other but how do I tell him I can’t go ahead with the “relationship” because of this issue? I love kissing and can’t fathom a relationship without it … but I also can’t fathom kissing someone with bad breath!!!

Is there a cure? It looks so trivial yet so important.
Can someone tell me how to go about it? How do
you deal with issues in a relationship? Do you
deal with it or simply walk away?
Let's talk ...

DAVE5:


oga we all know wat d op meant by how long it takes to "chase" a girl, so spare us and answer d simple qweshun......


as far as i know 'chase' in dis context encompasses patience, love and any other thing it takes to chase a girl whether or not u love her....

Rapsodee:
Want to know your opinions concerning it,some girls like playing hard to get,some also do pretend as if they don't like a guy which the reason for these I don't understand but for how long should a reasonable guy keep chasing her before finally letting her go

engrtee:
Message by someone



Sir there is a situation I am facing right now. I really want you to counsel me on it. I have been dating this guy for close to four years now. In the process of dating we engaged in premarital sex for some time..... then I decided to stop to stop because I always felt guilty. Later, he wasn't feeling too well and decided to run some test and the test said there are some sperm remaining which needed to be flushed out by drugs and more se, so against my will we had more sex. Later, he travelled to Bleep city, and after some time there, he started feeling pain in his left wrist, he went for a scan and said the doctor told him it was an inflammation. He said it was as a result of his forceful ejaculation and he said the left part of his body is connected to his sperm count vein. Although I don't know how true this is, but he said he needed to have sex for a month alongside with drugs or have an operation to flush it out again. Sir, I don't ever want to engage in premarital sex again. What should I do sir? Should I leave him because he is saying he cannot do the operation and might look for someone else to help him flush it by having sex if I'm not ready.......

My REPLY:

"Wow o wow......You have been fooled...You have been robed... you have been deceived..... you have been cheated.... you have messed up.... Oh my dear sister, please use your brain and use the internet.....THERE IS NO VEIN LINKING THE WRIST TO THE SPERM COUNT VEIN.... In fact, there is nothing like sperm count vein.....I have dealt with such fools before who use medical excuses to keep having sex....I have even handled a case where the guy arranged with a friend to pose as a doctor and the doctor called her... pleading that she must have sex with him as the only way to save his life....My dear, they are lies, lies, lies.... You have been robbed.....Your deception is further hinged on the fact that you loved a fool and stayed with a fool because he disvirgined you.... What has virginity loss got to do with love? Look at it the other way...Disvirgning a lady is like breaking her door....Now do you marry a carpenter who breaks your door? Do you marry a guy who bashed into your car? Do you marry a guy who mistakenly dropped and broke your glass bottle? How can you tell me you don't want to lose him because he put a penis inside you and broke a piece of blood tissues? Abeg e grow up and wake up and flee from this fool. I'm so mad about this post that I feel like finding the guy and arresting him. He is a disgrace to men. He is a misrepresentation of manhood. He is distorted symbol of relationship. Please my dear, It will be painful as you read this, but never never never again must any man fool you like this. Get my books...I say, get my books, It's time to get wisdom and flee foolishness... Get WHAT THE RABBIT DID NOT KNOW.... Get SEXUAL PURITY IS IT STILL POSSIBLE....Get DINAH AN UNTOLD STORY....Get HOW DO I GET OUT OF THIS MESS....These are books that will save you and help you.

UPDATE: After ready my reply, the lady in question was so mad and confused that she went and confronted this fool and guess what? He admitted that he was lying. Can you imagine that? Then he promised that he won't do it again? And the lady is asking me whether make she still marry the guy as their pastors were already aware of the relationship.

Beehorn:
Hello nairalanders. I am in need of matured piece of advice. My cousin is currently 19 yrz old and she had dated 4 guys. She is single and searching. All her exes ran away from her. The reason why they left her is because she refused to give up her virginity. Should she start having sex so has to please them? N.B: SHE IS A SECONDARY VIRGIN.

oracle009:
u ar quite onpoint! Itz NORMAL nd EXPECTED to av a sexual urge towards ur gf/bf/fiance/fiancee xcept u r impotent. Bt it nw dpend on d priorities uv set. E.g. My fiance nd I promised no sex til mariage, yet, d day she visitd my family nd slept overnite wt me, d urge was so intense for both of us. We just knew ds isnt wat we planned. We stopped! Nd evryone slept to continue wateva in drimland. So, d urge is scriptural nd biological, bt puttin it under control is a CHOICE

faithugo64:
most ladies believe that a guy who loves you would never want to sleep with you untill he marries you.so here is my question

is it possible to love someone and not have the DESIRE to kiss,hug or have sex with him/her?

Please i don't mean having sex with the person,i mean is it possible not to have the DESIRE(wanting) to be intimate with that person.

NOTE: HERE AM NOT TALKING ABOUT AGAPE LOVE O!!!

undercat:


That's bad advice bro. Marriage is not magic. If you cannot hold body, getting married will lead you to break a vow.

contactmorak:


Ask many ladies today what they look out for in a husband and they will tell you that he must be tall, dark, handsome and Godfearing. Though, you can automatically tell a man's height, complexion and good looks, how do you know if he is Godfearing?

undercat:
Everybody is well aware that there are double standards for girls when it comes to sexual activity. Girls are required to have fewer sexual partners than guys.

I never questioned this for so long, but recently my libido has gone into overdrive and I've found myself wanting more girls to have a fling with.

I couldn't help noticing that a good number of girls refuse to shag me unless I've told them that I'm looking for a serious relationship. At first I just assumed this was because I'm the ultimate relationship material, but on deeper thought I realized that this could be because a girl has it at the back of her mind that she'd come under fire for having flings.

Whereas a guy can keep as many fxck buddies as he wants, a girl is required to be chaste and possibly untouched (virgin). A girl is expected to stick to one guy and to ensure that she meets this requirement, a girl holds out until a guy shows seriousness.

I resent this greatly and I've started to take issue with guys who go about saying that they want to marry a virgin, or a belgium rather than fairly used girl. This is demeaning, and it reduces the number of girls available for flings, because girls will try to meet these expectations by denying you sex.

I've seen many girls who are feeling very "hot", but won't complete the act because they have become conditioned to not appreciate a fling.

I advocate for a less judgmental society, where women are not shamed for having as many sexual partners as they see fit, or at least at the same rate as the average guy. Every guy who is interested in a society with more girls that "understand" should support this. Thank you.