₦airaland Forum

Evablizin:



Just tired of this government,from plastic rice to plastic egg,now is plastic fish.

That is why you need to get your plastic so that we can vote them out

51 - When Mark Zukerberg created Facebook he already had a friend request waiting from Zlatan.
52 - Sweden’s biggest sports accomplishments: 1948: Olympic Champions 1958:
Silver World Cup Winners 1981: Zlatan is Born 2015: U21 Champions.
53 - Zlatan once went to a movie, and it watched him for two hours.
54 - A policeman once pulled Zlatan over. Zlatan let the policeman off with just a warning.
55 - Zlatan does not walk, the earth moves beneath his feet.
55 - Zlatan does not pay attention, attention pays him.
56 - Zlatan can tie his boots with his feet.
57 - Whenever Zlatan goes to a wedding, he is always the best man.
58 - Zlatan was seeing a movie in the cinema hall his phone rang so they paused the movie.
59 - Zlatan leaves a massage before the beep.
60 - Zlatan can find a haystack in a needle.
61 - Only Zlatan can have a facebook page with 0 posts and 100000 likes on it
62 - Only Zlatan can make onions cry
63 - Once a reporter asked Zlatan are you gay Zlatan replied you come to my
house bring your sister also I'll show you I am gay or not.
64 - Zlatan wears sunglasses so that his eyes won't burn the sun.
65 - Kids have photos of Ronaldo in there room Ronaldo has photos of Zlatan in his room.
66 - When Zlatan left his house he told his dad now you are the man of the house
67 - Zlatan's urine can be used as a fuel in Airplanes.
68 - Zlatan's tears can cure cancer.
69 - Zlatan died 10 years ago, death hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
70 - The Statue of Liberty in New York lifts its hand because it's a punishment from Zlatan.
71 - Once Zlatan masturbated on a house, that house is now known as White House.
72 - Zlatan makes fruit from juice.
73 - Zlatan has been to Mars, which is why there is no life there.
74 - Zlatan does not age, he levels up.
75 - Zlatan once counted up to infinity, twice.
x

This is all i will state

1 - When he was 10 years old, Zlatan decided to live by himself. And his parents just moved to another house.
2 - Zlatan lost his virginity even before his parents.
3 - One day Zlatan did a test in a lie detector machine. The machine confessed everything.
Arsenal - When Zlatan was young, his parents used to sleep on his bed when they were scared.
5 - When Zlatan goes to your place to visit you, you're the guest.
6 - The name of Zlatan's father is Zlatan Junior.
7 - One day Zlatan passed a red light and the police stopped his car. Zlatan charged the police.
8 - Zlatan helped the nurses when he was born.
9 - Zlatan never lies. The truth is what is wrong.
10 - When Alexander Graham Bell created the telephone, he already had three missed calls from Zlatan.
11- Oxygen needs Zlatan to survive.
12 - It is impossible for Zlatan to have a heart attack. Nothing is stupid enough to attack Zlatan.
13 - In school teachers used to raise their hands to talk with Zlatan.
14 - One day Zlatan missed two days in a row in the school. Later on, these days were called Saturday and Sunday.
15 - One day Zlatan arrived late at school. The other students were penalized because they arrived too early
16 - Kids go to sleep with a teddy bear, Zlatan goes to sleep with an actual bear
17 - When Zlatan makes a grammatical mistake the dictionary is updated
18 - Zlatan did not turn 36 years old, 36 years old turned Zlatan
19 - When Zlatan crosses the street, cars look both ways
20 - Zlatan doesn't have hair on his testicles because hair can't grow on steel
21 - You can't use 'Zlatan' as your password because it is 'too strong'.
22 - Zlatan wakes up his alarm clock every morning.
23 - Ghosts sit around camp fires & tell each other Zlatan stories.
24 - Zlatan doesn't make left turns, because everything he does is right.
25 - Zlatan once went skydiving and his parachute failed to open, so he took it back the next day for a refund.
26 - When Zlatan works out he doesn't get stronger, the machine does.
27 - Zlatan and Superman once had a race. The loser had to start wearing his underwear over his trousers.
28 - Zlatan went to school so he could be studied.
29 - Cameras can't take pictures of Zlatan, nothing takes anything from Zlatan.
30 - Zlatan can rip a page out of Facebook .
31 - Zlatan once killed two stones with one bird.
32 - There used to be a street in Sweden named after Zlatan but it had to be changed because nobody crosses Zlatan and lives.
33 - Zlatan was approached to star in Mission Impossible. But he refused because he found the title insulting.
34 - Zlatan starts a fire by rubbing two ice cubes together.
35 - Zlatan's keyboard doesn't have a delete button because Zlatan does not make mistakes.
36 - Zlatan once volleyed a horse in the chin. It's descendants are known today as giraffes.
37 - Zlatan doesn't wear a watch, he decides what time it is
38 - Zlatan doesn''t look for the ball, the ball looks for Zlatan.
39 - Zlatan doesn't go to the referee, the referee goes to Zlatan
40 - Zlatan has a diary. It's called the Guinness Book of World Records.
41 - Zlatan''s keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Zlatan
42 - When Zlatan looks in the mirror nothing appears. There can never be a second Zlatan.
43 - Zlatan''s voice never has an echo. Nothing talks back to Zlatan
44 - When we need to find something, we ask Google. When Google needs to find something, it asks Zlatan
45 - Zlatan starred in all 6 Star Wars movies…..As The Force.
47 - Zlatan does not draw teams in the Champions League, teams draw Zlatan.
48 - Jesus could walk on water, Zlatan can swim through land.
- Stop comparing Zlatan with God, I mean he's good but he is not Zlatan
49 - Zlatan can pick Lemons from an Apple tree and make the best Orange Juice you have ever tasted.
50 - Zlatan’s keyboard doesn’t have a question mark, Zlatan only has answers.

Wonder how they will feel when their kids come across these type of pictures......

MzMe:


So which of the three names is your name?

Take a guess

MzMe:
So I should start fucking every Dick Tom and Harry?

Oh no, no, no.....just every Tunde, Ahmed and Chukwudi......

This is always the problem.....comments attacking freeze and defending GO's..


The issue here is how do we put pressure on government to ensure the safe return of this girl......

All other talk here is pure trash.......

I don't know why.....but starwars suddenly came to my mind.....

What the..?

This mother fucker has lost his damn mind.........

What are three key trends that shape generations?

The three key trends that shape generations are parenting, technology, and economics. For example, many Baby Boomers have the parenting philosophy, “We want it to be easier for our kids than it was for us.” This philosophy, in turn, helped create and reinforce Millennials’ sense of entitlement, which is now a hotly debated topic.

Generation Z/Boomlets.
-Born after 2001*
-The number of births in 2006 far outnumbered the start of the baby boom generation, and they will easily be a larger generation.
--There are two age groups right now:
(a) Tweens.
(a1) Age 8-12 years old.
(a2) There will be an estimated 29 million tweens by 2009.
(a3) $51 billion is spent by tweens every year with an additional $170 billion spent by their parents and family members directly for them.
(b)Toddler/Elementary school age.
-61 percent of children 8-17 have televisions in their rooms.
-35 percent have video games.
-14 percent have a DVD player.
-4 million will have their own cell phones. They have never known a world without computers and cell phones.
-Have Eco-fatigue: they are actually tired of hearing about the environment and the many ways we have to save it.
-With the advent of computers and web based learning, children leave behind toys at younger and younger age. It’s called KGOY-kids growing older younger, and many companies have suffered because of it, most recognizable is Mattel, the maker of Barbie dolls. In the 1990’s the average age of a child in their target market was 10 years old, and in 2000 it dropped to 3 years old. As children reach the age of four and five, old enough to play on the computer, they become less interested in toys and begin to desire electronics such as cell phones and video games.
-They are Savvy consumers and they know what they want and how to get it and they are over saturated with brands.

Generation Y/Millennium.
-Born between 1981* and 2000*.
-Aka “The 9/11 Generation” “Echo Boomers” this next great generation brings a sharp departure from Generation X.
-They are nurtured by omnipresent parents, optimistic, and focused.
-Respect authority.
-They learned early that the world is not a safe place.
-They schedule everything.
-They feel enormous academic pressure.
-They feel like a generation and have great expectations for themselves.
-Prefer digital literacy as they grew up in a digital environment. Have never known a world without computers! They get all their information and most of their socialization from the Internet.
-Prefer to work in teams.
-With unlimited access to information tend to be assertive with strong views.
-Envision the world as a 24/7 place; want fast and immediate processing.
-They have been told over and over again that they are special, and they expect the world to treat them that way.
-They do not live to work, they prefer a more relaxed work environment with a lot of hand holding and accolades.

Generation X.
-Born between 1965 and 1980*
-The “latch-key kids” grew up street-smart but isolated, often with divorced or career-driven parents. Latch-Key came from the house key kids wore around their neck, because they would go home from school to an empty house.
-Entrepreneurial.
-Very individualistic.
-Government and big business mean little to them.
-Want to save the neighborhood, not the world
-Feel misunderstood by other generations
-Cynical of many major institutions, which failed their parents, or them, during their formative years and are therefore eager to make marriage work and “be there” for their children
-Don’t “feel” like a generation, but they are
-Raised in the transition phase of written based knowledge to digital knowledge archives; most remember being in school without computers and then after the introduction of computers in middle school or high school
-Desire a chance to learn, explore and make a contribution
-Tend to commit to self rather than an organization or specific career. This generation averages 7 career changes in their lifetime, it was not normal to work for a company for life, unlike previous generations.
-Society and thus individuals are envisioned as disposable.
-AIDS begins to spread and is first lethal infectious disease in the history of any culture on earth which was not subjected to any quarantine.
-Beginning obsession of individual rights prevailing over the common good, especially if it is applicable to any type of minority group.
-Raised by the career and money conscious Boomers amidst the societal disappointment over governmental authority and the Vietnam war.
-School problems were about drugs.
-Late to marry (after cohabitation) and quick to divorce…many single parents.
-Into labels and brand names.
-Want what they want and want it now but struggling to buy, and most are deeply in credit card debt.
-It is has been researched that they may be conversationally shallow because relating consists of shared time watching video movies, instead of previous generations.
-Short on loyalty & wary of commitment; all values are relative…must tolerate all peoples.
-Self-absorbed and suspicious of all organization.
-Survivors as individuals.
-Cautious, skeptical, unimpressed with authority, self-reliant.

Baby Boomers
Baby boomers are the demographic of people who were born just after the Second World War; this would give the baby boomer generation
an approximate date of between 1946 and 1964 . World war two ended in a 1945, and as a rule of thumb baby boomers are the children
who are born as the war ended, as families settled down again.

-Born between 1946 and 1964. Two sub-sets:
-1. the save-the-world revolutionaries of the ’60s and ’70s; and
-2. the party-hardy career climbers (Yuppies) of the ’70s/’80s.
-The “me” generation.
-“Rock and roll” music generation.
-Ushered in the free love and societal “non-violent” protests which triggered violence.
-Self righteous & self-centered.
-Buy it now and use credit.
-Too busy for much neighborly involvement yet strong desires to reset or change the common values for the good of all.
-Even though their mothers were generally housewives, responsible for all child rearing, women of this generation began working outside the home in record numbers, thereby changing the entire nation as this was the first generation to have their own children raised in a two-income household where mom was not omnipresent.
-The first TV generation.
-The first divorce generation, where divorce was beginning to be accepted as a tolerable reality.
-Began accepting homosexuals.
-Optimistic, driven, team-oriented.
-Envision technology and innovation as requiring a learning process.
-Tend to be more positive about authority, hierarchal structure and tradition.
-One of the largest generations in history with 77 million people.
-Their aging will change the world almost incomprehensibly; they are the first generation to use the word “retirement” to mean being able to enjoy life after the children have left home. Instead of sitting in a rocking chair, they go skydiving, exercise and take up hobbies, which increases their longevity.
-The American Youth Culture that began with them is now ending with them and their activism is beginning to re-emerge.

Silent Generation.
Born 1927- 1945.
Went through their formative years during an era of suffocating conformity, but also during the postwar happiness: Peace! Jobs! Suburbs! Television! Rock ‘n Roll! Cars! Playboy Magazine!

-Korean and Vietnam War generation.
-The First Hopeful Drumbeats of Civil Rights!
-Pre-feminism women; women stayed home generally to raise children, if they worked it was only certain jobs like teacher, nurse or secretary.
-Men pledged loyalty to the corporation, once you got a job, you generally kept it for life.
-The richest, most free-spending retirees in history.
-Marriage is for life, divorce and having children out of wedlock were not accepted.
-In grade school, the gravest teacher complaints were about passing notes and chewing gum in class.
-They are avid readers, especially newspapers.
-“Retirement” means to sit in a rocking chair and live your final days in peace.
-The Big-Band/Swing music generation.
-Strong sense of trans-generational common values and near-absolute truths.
-Disciplined, self-sacrificing, & cautious.

GI Generation.
Born 1901-1926.
Children of the WWI generation & fighters in WWII & young in the Great Depression…all leading to strong models of teamwork to overcome
and progress. Their Depression was The Great One; their war was The Big One; their prosperity was the legendary Happy Days.

-They saved the world and then built a nation.
-They are the assertive and energetic do’ers.
-Excellent team players.
-Community-minded.
-Strongly interested in personal morality and near-absolute standards of right and wrong.
-Strong sense of personal civic duty, which means they vote.
-Marriage is for life, divorce and having children out of wedlock were not accepted.
-Strong loyalty to jobs, groups, schools, etc.
-There was no “retirement” you worked until your died or couldn’t work anymore.
-The labor-union-spawning generation.
-“Use it up, fix it up, make it do, or do without.”
-Avoid debt…save and buy with cash.
-Age of radio and air flight; they were the generation that remembers life without airplanes, radio, and TV.
-Most of them grew up without modern conveniences like refrigerators, electricity and air conditioning.
-Sometimes called The Greatest Generation.

Let me take this opportunity to say a big thank you, to all that supported in this noble cause....

The lady in question has under gone surgery and is now recuperating just fine......

May we all always find help at our hour of need.

Will post updates when i get some......Stay blessed all....you all rock

cc: TEHN, Lalasticlala, Mynd44, dominique, Ymodulus

I bet you have heard things like...the millennium generation, baby boomers generations....You might have been wandering which you belong too or even what it all means...well here is a breakdown

1. What is the definition of a generation?

A generation is a group of people born around the same time and raised around the same place. People in this “birth cohort” exhibit similar characteristics, preferences, and values over their lifetimes. Gnerations are not a box; instead, they are powerful clues showing where to begin connecting with and influencing people of different ages. There are big differences between the generations and it's important to know the years when each generation begins and ends. Millennials, for example, are the most consistent generation globally. However, we still see important differences between Millennials raised in an urban environment versus those raised in a rural one or those who move to a new country.


2. What makes generations consistent at a high level?

Generations exhibit similar characteristics—such as communication, shopping, and motivation preferences—because they experienced similar trends at approximately the same life stage and through similar channels (e.g., online, TV, mobile, etc.). Generation-shaping trends are most influential as people come of age, which means that members of a particular generation will develop and share similar values, beliefs, and expectations. It is important to remember that at an individual level, everyone is different. But looking at people through a generational lens offers useful predictability for those trying to reach, inform, or persuade a large cross-section of a population.

3. What are the primary generations today?

Currently, five generations make up our society. Each of those five generations have their unique characteristics and influence in society. Here are the birth years for each generation:Most of the sixth generation are gone now, but its still of interest to know what they were all about

1) Gen Z, iGen, or Centennials: Born 1996 and later
2) Millennials or Gen Y: Born 1977 to 1995
3) Generation X: Born 1965 to 1976
4) Baby Boomers: Born 1946 to 1964
5) Traditionalists or Silent Generation: Born 1945 to 1927
6) GI Generation: Born 1901-1926.

Generation birth years vary by geography, and you’ll see varying characteristics in different parts of the world. The big events that affect a generation can be dramatically different across the globe or at least regionalized or national in scope, and trends can hit at different times.


Lalasticlala, Mynd44....a little something for the weekend

And there they are, the Pythons that have been swallowing our collective wealth............

That was a nice goal......But has the definition of "ROCKET CHANGED"

Did anyone notice that, in all the pictures, there is no shot of any mangled bodies or display of dead bodies.....that goes to show the respect that they accord the dead and their families......

If say na naija now.....you know the rest....

So once again I appeal to Nairaland and Nairalanders....show respect to the dead....stop posting pictures of dead bodies.....

Gucciboss:
Nigerians are the most confused set of beings on earth. Why do you guys keep making it difficult for people to speak up in future? Why are some of you shouting up and down like hungry goat?

Do you expect a primary school teacher to tell how much a governor earns? It is the same beneficiaries of this rotten system that will still tell you what is wrong in the system.

You guys should use your brains for once.

Those of you shouting revolution everyday should note that you can't revolt against what you don't know. Allow them to finish their confessions first. Your rubbish comments on social media is causing more harm than good.

You are the main man.....your head dey there.....I just dey read all the previous mumu comment....

We have a high percentage of dull people in Nigeria

Prepaid meter is the way...since January wey i load 5k, na him i still dey use till now.....Prepaid is the answer to all this PHCN ojoro....

Painful....but no biggie......By the way have you seen Buhari's Economy......I'm surprised you even remember your own birthday......Bros hustle is real ....pips are trying to get some cheddar, they hypnotized on that ish.....

It has been called the biggest fantasy debut novel of 2018, drawing comparisons with everything from Game of Thrones to Black Panther, and has netted a movie deal reported to be worth seven figures.

But Tomi Adeyemi, the 24-year-old Nigerian-American author of Children of Blood and Bone, says that such success was the last thing on her mind when she sat down to write her epic tale of an oppressive world where magic has been outlawed.

“For the past 10 months I’ve spent a lot of time thinking, is this for real?” she says. “I had a lot of different reasons for writing the book but at its core was the desire to write for black teenage girls growing up reading books they were absent from. That was my experience as a child. Children of Blood and Bone is a chance to address that. To say you are seen.”

Adeyemi is the middle child of three – her brother is a musician and her younger sister still at college. Her father is a doctor, while her mother runs a group of hospices outside Chicago. She studied English literature at Harvard before heading to Brazil on a fellowship to study west African culture and mythology. It was in South America that the seeds of Children of Blood and Bone, the first in a trilogy, were sown.
https://www.theguardian.com/books/2018/mar/10/tomi-adeyemi-interview-children-of-blood-and-bone-sarah-hughes

This must be the more docile american bee breed.....I would like to see him try this with the african bee breed....

Hope most of you shouting Nigerian parents, realize that you will become parents too......

How will you handle training your own kids, to be responsible Adults when they grow up....

Will you just be looking and let them do what ever they want......

Also judging by the level of disrespect she is showing her father.....there are obviously other deep issues on ground here

I have only one thing to say...."You will reap what you sow"

JasonScolari:
Shut up dummy.... What can you do? Report me to Sango or Oduduwa?

Lol.... Bros you go fear, fear