₦airaland Forum

I smell lies. op pls get a life

Just stumbled on this on my Facebook page. It got me laughing out loud. Apart from the poor composition, the commenter also think people are so myopic and gullible as himself.
Please read and laugh....... Don't follow the information in the comedy ooooo.

"Happy new month to all friends,in facebook My name is randy, am fro m lagos state and am 23 years old have be calling some many agent to hook me up with a sugar mummy after sending them money day we not give any sugar mummy but one good day I see (barrister lawson) post on facebook and I persn! call him and he tell me every thing how am going to get a rich sugar mummy and he also tell me what to do and I do it, can you believe me that after I do every thing. (barrister lawson) give me her contact first and I call the sugar mummy and the sugar mummy tell me were to meet her and I went to the plays thrush I see her and I was very happy, when I meet her I tell her that I don't have money to pay my school fees and she take me to the bank and give me 80.000 for me to pay my school fees, be for we stared the connection, so today am a very happy man and I have the money to do any thing I like now am a big man, pls my friends help me to thank (barrister Lawson) for what he have do in my life, I use this opportunity to tell every one in any state or any country if you need a rich sugar mummy (barrister lawson) is the only one who can give you a real sugar mummy that we make you happy if you are interested to get any sugar mummy in any state or any country just contact agent morgan on 08145507009 or whatsapp for instant hookup on +234814550709 may you be bless .please if you call him help me too thank him....... 1 love"











Pls don't call

Wonders they say will never end. The reader who send this in
alleged that this ugly incident took place at Orlu in Imo State. It is
reported that the pastor who is the founder of Holiness of heaven
ministries located at Orlu was a very powerful pastor who
performed numerous miracles,gave prophesies and healed the sick.
That was until his new wife raised alarm of his fetish alliance with a
very dangerous native doctor within the community. Graphic photo
when you continue It was alleged that the irate village youth
mobilized and raided the pastor’s church and personal chambers.
A lot of fetish item was discovered leading to the burning down of
the church and shrine of the juju priest before the alleged ritualists
were paraded n.aked around town.
source: viralng.com/2015/12/14/photo-pastor-who-uses-juju-caught-and-paraded-n-aked-with-his-juju-priest/

Mine is, loyal loving sweet loving





NB: Ladies and gentlemen, pls don't fall for a guy or lady using this as a determining factor or else you'll find yourself in the accident or emergency ward. Cos I know we have so many gullible people on NL.





THANK ME LATER!!!

[color=#990000][/color]It seems number 4 is about carrying the day

Im just happy that we voted for change because it has led to the end of early morning disturbance from my landlord's rickety car. God bless PMB

This is the meeting point of those agitating for a new country

1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11 or 12?

A Sudanese man who was caught raping a goat was forced to marry the animal » in line with a law in that country that stipulates that any man caught sleeping with a woman who is not his wife
must marry her » to save the honour of her family.
So when Charles Tombe was caught in the act while having sex with the female goat, he was made to consummate the 'love' relationship with it to save its honour as a form of restitution.
On the day of the bizarre wedding, he and his 'bride' were clad in matching outfits as they walked before the village council to celebrate the happy union, after he had paid a dowry to the owner of he goat.
The goat’s owner, identified as Mr Alifi, said he was the one who caught the man with his goat and took him to a council of elders and the council ordered Tombe, to pay a dowry of 15,000 Sudanese dinars ($50) to Alifi.
“We have given him the goat, and as far as we know they are still together,” Alifi said.
Alifi, of Hai Malakal in Upper Nile State, told the Juba Post newspaper that he heard a loud noise around midnight on 13 February and immediately rushed outside to find Tombe with his goat.
pulse.ng/gist/weird-world-sudanese-man-forced-to-marry-goat-he-raped-id4086126.html

timmydrogba:
you nor dey sleep? End time post.

Na for your dream you type dis comment? end time timmydrogba

Guys pls I need a candid response in order to help me make an informed decision. Will you go for a lady that is very good in love making and poor in cooking or you'll rather go for the one that is extremely good in cooking but extremely poor on bed (once in three months and only the missionary style for just 5 minutes)....

The masquerade realised that the policeman just finished 10 raps of Osogbo weed.

What will happen if your mother meet you in this condition? And you are yet to marry her.

Na by force?

RAF Tornado jets have carried out their first air strikes against so-called Islamic State in Syria, the Ministry of Defence has confirmed.
The strikes came hours after MPs voted in favour of UK action in Syria.
They backed the action by 397 votes to 223 after a 10-hour debate in the House of Commons.
Four Tornado jets took off from RAF Akrotiri, Cyprus, shortly after the vote.
A Ministry of Defence spokesman said the sorties had returned from the “first offensive operation over Syria and have conducted strikes”.
Two of the four Tornados arrived back in Cyprus just over three hours after they left the base, landing shortly before 03:00 GMT.
BBC defence correspondent Jonathan Beale said the pair of Tornados had left RAF Akrotiri with three 500lb Paveway bombs each and returned to base without those weapons.
The Ministry of Defence is expected to give details of their targets later on Thursday, he added.
The RAF was already carrying out operations against IS in Iraq.
Following the vote, Prime Minister David Cameron said MPs had “taken the right decision to keep the country safe” but opponents said the move was a mistake.
A total of 66 Labour MPs sided with the government as Cameron secured a larger than expected Commons majority.
newtelegraphonline.com/uk-launches-first-syria-air-strikes-after-house-vote/

benedictnsi:
The guy stingy oooo you just have 10k..... You for add more na make she use buy body spray

Bad guy

When she thinks you are an Automated Teller Machine a.k.a Mumu..... Then you give her such answer to place her well.

my baby is the first from the left.

When you don't have enough money to take her out for a dinner on her birthday.
Then you struggle, borrow and squeeze to raise something manageable for just the both of you.
But your girlfriend surprised you by coming with her sisters.
You don't want the little respect they have for you to fall.
How will you turn them back?

When you think you have dressed to kill...
You want to show your in-law to be, that you are a man with the right combination of colours when it comes to dressing. ...
You want to meet yor family-in-law for the first time.....
You want to meet all her talkertive siblings you've being talking to on phone.....
But on getting to your in-law's house, the expensive cloth you want to use to show off and impress happen to be their CURTAIN!!! yes I mean the curtain on their doors, windows, in short round the house..... what will you do?

..

nnachukz:
Na to take style go back to my house be that. Visiting and seeing inlaws cancelled till further notice. I will suspect collaborative back stabbing on the part of my gf.

What if your girlfriend known nothing about it?

When you think you have dressed to kill...
You want to show your in-law to be, that you are a man with the right combination of colours when it comes to dressing. ...
You want to meet yor family-in-law for the first time.....
You want to meet all her talkertive siblings you've being talking to on phone.....
But on getting to your in-law's house, the expensive cloth you want to use to show off and impress happen to be their CURTAIN!!! yes I mean the curtain on their doors, windows, in short round the house..... what will you do?

The great novel Animal Farm written by the legendary author George Orwell is about animals and how they live together in a hierarchical society. As it turns out, he may have been talking about the stock market. The market is full of these named animals and each has a different place on the investment pole.
Pigs are greedy, chickens fearful, bears hide and sleep, bulls charge ahead. Over the years these names have become synonymous with a person’s investment interest or view of how the market is going to move. Really the names of the animals signify an individual’s approach or philosophical investment strategy.
Here are the animal definitions converted to investment philosophies:


Bull: A Bull Market means the economy is growing and means investor confidence and anticipation of market growth.
Bear: A Bear Market is the opposite, the economy is weakened or expected to weaken. The stock market is expected to be lower in the future.


Pig: A Pig Market is a high risk big score (or big loss) position. Pigs are impatient, greedy and emotional towards their investments and only think of themselves. Pigs normally get slaughtered.


Chicken: A Chicken Market is fear. Chickens have no specific plan and are driven by fear of losing their money. Fear overrides common sense and any plan is quickly changed if a loss occurs.


If you have a plan based on reality you are probably not a pig or a chicken. It means you have used good, available information and are heading towards your goal. As we age, the goal can also change, from accumulation to income.
But what about this….what if you can’t afford to lose any of your important money! How do you evolve from the barnyard descriptions with a philosophy that makes sense to you? In other words, how does your retirement plans relate to safety, security and stability?
While no one approach makes sense for everyone, using a new financial vehicle called a Fixed Indexed Annuity with an income rider attached really works for many people. The annuity provides total protection from any downside movement in the stock market while providing a guaranteed yield in the range of 4% to8% when used as income. (income rider)
If it is time to take a new approach to some of your important retirement funds, consider this powerful option, then maybe you will no longer be a barnyard animal, you could be soaring like an eagle.

Brought to you by Ibrahim Kabir Adedeji

Frimino, Benteke and Continho will create the difference. You'll never walk alone!!!!! 2-3.... 3 points on point.

When you are the first to buy a ram in your family.

lol

christinie:
So so so handsome.

I'm shy... thank you for the complement

I'm giving myself a 10/10

9 Surprising Benefits of Crying, or Why It’s
Okay To Have a Good Cry.

HEALTH LIFESTYLE BY DANIEL WALLEN |

9 Surprising Benefits of Crying

How long has it been since you’ve had a good cry? Some people see watery eyes as a sign of weakness, but confronting your emotions
(especially the not-so-pretty ones) requires
strength in the form of vulnerability. Grab a
tissue if you need to and read on to discover
9 surprising benefits of crying.

Being vulnerable helps you connect with others.

“No tears in the writer, no tears in the
reader. No surprise in the writer, no surprise
in the reader.” – Robert Frost

I know you might be afraid to reveal how you really feel to a friend or partner (especially if you just so happen to be so upset you want to cry). But being vulnerable is the best way to grow closer to another person. If everything isn’t okay, don’t say it is. If you want to cry (and feel comfortable enough with this person to do so), just let it go. Sure, some people might not like it, but the ones who matter will appreciate how upfront you are.
Confronting your feelings helps you move
forward in life.

“Men must live and create. Live to the point
of tears.” – Albert Camus

It’s awfully tempting to play it safe in life, but
if you don’t take the occasional risk, you can’t
expect much excitement or personal growth. It
isn’t easy to put yourself into a new situation
with feelings and emotions attached (for example: starting a new relationship after being emotionally damaged in your last one), but just because it isn’t easy doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it. If you have harsh feelings left over from love lost, confront them without fear. Don’t try to run and hide from how you feel. Be still and soak in it. The sooner you
confront your past, the sooner you can move
forward into a better future.
Expressing your emotions helps you be
creative.

“I cry very easily. It can be a movie, a
phone conversation, a sunset–tears are
words waiting to be written.” – Paulo Coelho

Are you an artist or writer? If so, maybe
you’ve noticed that your greatest life struggles
have a way of ending up in your art. My most
well-received blogs and articles are without
fail the most personal ones. I think this is
because opening up humanizes a writer in the
eyes of their readers. But it’s quite difficult to
find the courage to express yourself without
filter if you can’t even bring yourself to face
your feelings.
No matter what you’re going through, be
strong and deal with it.
Have a good cry if you need to.
Looking for further release?
Ask yourself, “How can I express what I just
went through in a way that will help or inspire
others?”
Spoiler Alert : I bet you’ll discover a whole lot
of folks know exactly how you feel (and will be
so happy you were thoughtful enough to help
them).
Releasing your tears helps you flush out
toxins.
“Crying is cleansing. There’s a reason for
tears, happiness or sadness.” – Dionne
Warwick
A study performed by Dr. William H. Frey II at
the St Paul-Ramsey Medical Centre found that
stress-related tears and tears caused by
physical irritants ( think chopping an onion) are
not one and the same. Tears that are
provoked by stress help your body rid itself of
nasty chemicals that raise cortisol (the stress
hormone). In other words: you’ll feel a whole
lot better after the emotional down-pour
passes.
Letting go of your baggage helps you end
suffering.
“But a mermaid has no tears, and therefore
she suffers so much more.” – Hans
Christian Andersen, The Little Mermaid
Would you rather face your feelings without
fear or pretend everything is okay when it
isn’t? Sure, the first option might come with
temporary comfort, but pretending problems
don’t exist only delays the inevitable. You
cannot run and hide from how you feel forever,
no matter how hard you try. Carrying all that
baggage around is detrimental for your
emotional health, so it’s in your best interest
to cry if you need to. While this won’t
necessarily solve your problems, it could help
you come-to-terms with them .
Crying helps you deal with stress.
“…you know that a good, long session of
weeping can often make you feel better,
even if your circumstances have not
changed one bit.”- Lemony Snicket
From the Huffington Post article, “Stress
Relief: Why Crying Supports Emotional
Wellness
”
Professor Roger Baker, a consultant clinical
psychologist and visiting professor at
Bournemouth University, told the UK’s Daily
Mail that “crying is the transformation of
distress into something tangible, and that the
process itself helps to reduce the feeling of
trauma.”
Have you ever felt sad for no reason?
Emotions aren’t always logical. Letting your
emotion take hold of you, whether that results
in crying or not, could help you find the
reason behind your tears. And when you’re
aware of the problem that requires your
attention, you’ll be free to find an antidote for
the stress that ails you.
Weeping helps you come to terms with a loss.
“To weep is to make less the depth of
grief.” – William Shakespeare
Losing a family member, friend, partner, or pet
is one of the worst things anyone could ever
go through. In situations like this, words don’t
suffice. Sometimes the only thing you can do
is hug someone you love and let the tears
flow.
Having a good cry helps you feel better.
“What soap is for the body, tears are for the
soul.” – Jewish Proverb
A study performed at the University of Florida
found that crying is more effective than any
antidepressant on the market
. A good cry improved the mood of 88.8% of
weepers with only 8.4% reporting that crying
made them feel worse.
Being unafraid to cry makes you strong.
“There is a sacredness in tears. They are
not the mark of weakness, but of power.
They speak more eloquently than ten
thousand tongues. They are the messengers
of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition,
and of unspeakable love.” – Washington
Irving
I hope reading these benefits of crying helps
you handle your emotions more positively.
Don’t be afraid of looking weak because it
takes a strong person to cry.
Can you remember a time you were moved to
tears but felt a whole lot better after the fact?
If so, I’d love to hear all about it in the
comments.
Have you ever had one of those days when all
you wanted to do was read an emotionally
powerful story that would provoke you to
tears?