₦airaland Forum

Girls should be like butterflies .. Beautiful & Hard to catch . But a lot of you are like mosquitoes .. Annoying & Easy to smash

Two drunk girls were walking home, coming from a night club. They got frightened when walking near a high accident zone.
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A good Samaritan guy came with a Range Rover, and gave them a lift. They thanked him for the relief from the fright. He said "You should be frightened, because i was also killed here".

When married people are having sex, is like jazz music. They do it soft, and peacefully.
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But for cheating couples it's fast like Tsonga music. You will return home tired, and feeling like you were involved on a car accident.

Nowadays, relationships are like birthday parties. . Once the cake is eaten, then the party is over.

vivie01:
hahahahahahah
Oga Krystaal well done ooo

When a lady sits on a table while she's on her periods. . It automatically becomes a periodic table.

The number of beds some ladies have slept on,are enough to open a National hospital*.

STUPIDITY: is when you have a Land Rover and a Land cruiser but still have Landlord.

bamdly:
u haven't post anythin on ur IG page Oga Krystal

Yes sir I'm working on another page solely for my jokes....I'm yet to get enough support...I'm sorry

*Why is the pussy located at the lower part of the body n the boobs on the uppet part
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*because......milk should be kept away from the cat *
knowledge will not kill me

That moment when u're very ugly that way when your Father Look at u and told your Mother that,"We should've used Condom on this one"

A man fainted in front of KFC, then the whole people in the restaurant rushed to him and rescue him, one person shouted " Bring him water plz ". Then the man ( Who fainted) opened a left eye and said " If I wanted water i would've fainted In front of the whole sea, don't bullshit me, look at where I fainted and do the right thing"

A Pilot was told to carry mad men from Nigeria to the U.S.A For treatment, he agreed and carried them in his plane.
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On their way, everywhere was so noisy, later one of the mad men approached the pilot and said "Please can you teach me how to fly an aeroplane?"
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The pilot replied, "i will teach you how to fly a plane if you'll tell your friends to stop making noise (knowing he won't do it)
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The mad man went in, after some minutes, everywhere was so silent and calm as if an angel entered the plane.
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A minutes later, the mad man came back and told the pilot that everywhere was cool now!
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the pilot became happy and asked "what did you do to them that made them to keep calm?"
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The mad man replied, "I opened the door for them to go and play outside"
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The pilot fainted!

I once Blocked my Mom's Slap...the Next Day She was telling the whole Relative and Her Friends that i wanted to Kill Her!

Some of you girls have your own Boyfriends,but you still ask for Airtime from people's Boyfriends..
My Question Is:Have you ever seen shoprite Employees Getting paid their Salaries at Spar?

I just pity those boys that will be squeezing girls neck during copulation.
When the girl suffocates and die, you'll explain to the police why you can't do simple doggy style.
And I'm very sure the girl will also explain to God why she can't ask you to do simple Missionary position.

Chai See how I missed FTC by seconds ...God punish 9mobile

I don't think anyone has felt used like me, A girl once dated me because I was tall n she needed someone to help hang her curtains

That moment when You Realize You Submitted The Question Paper And Went Home With The Answer Sheet .

Follow me on Ig@_official_krystal_

Nothing makes me happy than a movie written 18VNSL.......

Relationship Stress can make you go to a Funeral of someone you don't know just to Cry so Hard without anyone judging you!

Follow on Ig@_official_Krystal_

Once again, i would like to greet all the guys that have no kids. Whereas they are in relationships with ladies that have kids.
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I am saying " What kind of a match that begins with 1 - 0 score ?

If you're broke and your woman is paying your rent then it's your role to scream during Sex. You can't be useless day and night

When I was young, I decided to take medical exams, at the entrance exams we were told to rearrange P N E I S to form a very important organ in the human body that is mostly useful when erect.
Those like James who answered S P I N E are doctors today, the rest of us are on Nairaland

Nothing is more painful than using the whole Saturday to wash your boyfriend's clothes, Only for him to break up with you on Sunday morning

# That moment when you get a voice note from your crush and you go to every corner and room in your house for headphones, only to hear
"Go away please, you aren't my type"

*I'd wanted to go out jogging this morning BUT I read proverbs 28:1 which says "the wicked runs when no man is chasing them" So I stopped and sat back at home jejely

I just found out that Catching flowers at weddings does not make u d next bride...My neighbour has caught 13 already & she doesn't even have a BF

I'm glad ATMs say "Please take your cash" because manners are important, otherwise I'd leave the money there if they didn't ask me nicely

To those guys and girls who used used to start a song during Assembly in school, How's life...how many Albums do u have now?

THE ONLY TIME PARENTS BECOME HUMBLE IS WHEN YOU ARE TEACHING THEM HOW TO OPERATE A SMART PHONE YOU CAN EVEN SEND THEM TO GET YOU WATER FROM THE FRIDGE

have to stop making promises during sex.......Now I owe one Lady two houses, one helicopter, three cars........where do I start?

That few days when you are busy stressing, and worried that your girlfriend is struggling from period pains.
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Wheras another guy is celebrating, that if she's on periods, it means she's not pregnant.