₦airaland Forum

Namaster:
First of all, your story needs more BACKGROUND.

Like what is the nature of the DISPUTE that fractured your family in such a way that MOST of your siblings took the side of your father, who sounds like a TERRIBLE person?

Next, be STRATEGIC before you leave.

Make plans on how to SUSTAIN yourself in light of the fact that you'd now be spending on your ACCOMODATION.

Plan in such a way that NOTHING brings you crawling back to your father in the future.

Live like an ORPHAN.

ANY father who lay ATOMIC curses on his own son like your father did to you is NOT worthy to be called a father.

He's DEAD to you!

Well what caused this whole issue is his personality, he use to come home drunk and beat her to stupor when I was little, and I just watched helplessly until I grew up and started standing up to him to a point we had an altercation and I almost did the same to him, he stopped supporting her financially and otherwise, he prefers taking care of his concubines and whatever he does with his money, but I made sure my mum didn't lack and that annoyed him more, he said I am challenging him by feeding my mom and clothing her and I'm acting like I'm her husband, he threatened to cut my siblings off of they do the same, so they obeyed and he had them in his grip but I kept defying him until my mum died, she was okay in the morning and suddenly died from a headache in the evening by 10pm even though I rushed her to the hospital and she was admitted for almost six hours before she died, when she died he rubbed my nose in it and said I should carry my cross that I'm her husband not him, that's story for another day, after the burial none of them talks to me anymore, it used to be me and my mom now it's just me, and they're all facing me, so it's just me against all of them now, and they completely iced me out.

2special:
how about your extended family

They are actually his step siblings, most of them are in foreign countries and they don't care about everyone in Nigeria, infact they never send anything home so I'm not familiar with them, as for my mother's side they're few surviving siblings, but they're not well to do, infact na them go expect you to help them with something, plus his siblings are not in good terms with him and the ones that are in good terms with him are scared of him.

SoftSport:
I'm really sorry you're going through all of this. From what you've shared, it's clear that your environment is deeply harmful, and wanting to leave makes complete sense. Protecting your peace and well-being should come first, especially when you're surrounded by hostility and negativity.

If you're planning to move, it’s important to approach it carefully. Try to save up as much as you can before leaving so you have something to fall back on. Think about where you’d like to go and choose a place where you see the most opportunities for growth. Finding a stable place to stay, even if it’s shared housing, will help you settle in smoothly.

Once you’ve left, focus on your goals. Building a new life is hard, but if you channel all your energy into your training and personal development, it’ll pay off in time. Surround yourself with people who genuinely care for you, even if they’re not blood relatives. Friends, mentors, and colleagues can become the supportive family you need right now.

As for your father and the toxic environment at home, it’s understandable that you want to cut ties. His negativity doesn’t define you or determine your future. Leaving could give you the mental space to focus on healing and proving to yourself that you can succeed. At the same time, it’s important to acknowledge the grief you’re feeling after losing your mum and being isolated by your family. Finding peace through faith, reflection, or even talking to someone you trust can help lighten that burden over time.

If you feel your father’s actions are spiritually or emotionally dangerous, take measures to protect yourself based on your beliefs. Stay grounded in what brings you strength and peace. By stepping away, you’re giving yourself the chance to grow in an environment that isn’t suffocating you. Every small step forward is progress, and over time, you’ll see how far you’ve come.

You deserve a life filled with peace, purpose, and success. Leaving might be the first step toward creating that for yourself.

thank you.

2special:
At least build the relationship with your siblings then

they were told to treat me with animosity or face fire, no one wants to face fire so they had to treat me with animosity.

Kobojunkie:
1. You have a free roof over your head, something that over 20 million Nigerians living in Nigeria cannot even boast of but your particular complaint is rather that no one pays attention to you?

2. Are you able to provide yourself shelter and everything else at this point? I am not certain how old you are but if you can hold off on wanting to move until you are well on your feet, then do so first before you decide to finally ghost your father for good. It will not help you at all to leave endangering your well-being in the process. Yes, your home does seem toxic but since it isn't physically dangerous, I see no reason for you to rush your move. Also, given the economic situation in the country, as well as widespread insecurity, try to get a place before you leave your home.

3. There is no such thing as diabolical action... All attacks are either physical, social, or emotional. And if you can focus on growing yourself, then you should direct much of your focus on that which matters.

First off, I don't care about his roof, I prefer sleeping in the streets to his roof whatever it is, second yes I was fending for myself and my mum and I still am, If you actually read my post it's not a cry of struggling to survive because he cut me off, it's about getting away from him and making sure he never sets his eyes on me again, so roof or no roof I don't care, I pray you don't meet someone this evil, because you'd be damaged for life.

chatinent:
Quack.
If you've not experienced such types of fathers, your best advice should be giving a deafening silence.
[sup][/sup]

The reason he's saying this is because he thinks life revolves around having a roof over your head, but at this point I don't care if I sleep under a bridge as long as I'm safe, my siblings who are backing him are afraid of loosing the roof over their heads, they're also scared of being cut off like he cut me off so they witness his injustice and keep mute, I'm the only one resisting him and that's why I'm an outsider, he will also stop paying their school fee if they stand up to him so I can't really blame them, and if you're his minion you must hate whoever he hates even if you don't have personal problems with the person, if you don't follow him to hate the person he will cut you off.

Verydarkhearted:
They always start with a touching story then end it with begging..

Maybe begging online is what you do with your life, I don't do that, so stop projecting your lifestyle onto others, I didn't ask anyone for a penny talk more of you.

Wealthoptulent:
Ti omo bati le da gbe inugbo, ati dete ki shey ogun.. (IF A KID IN NOT SCARED TO LIVE IN BUSH, LEPROSY IS NOT a DISEASE) sice u fending for ursef alone already, dont lose completely cut him off, its a WIN WIN tin... but first"ARE YOU DOING THE RIGHT THING?" did u WEDGE behind TRUTH when u THREW ur WEIGHT behind ur MUM? Marital matter no be wetin children delve into but only when u completey know, seen the TRUTH not HEARSAY or TALES read like night stories to bed

Right, it was fair to watch him torment a defenseless woman until she died, not like she ever cheated or stole, he's just a man who derives pleasure in maltreating women when he has concubines outside, say whatever you want I don't regret standing by my mom.

Deelaw:
Are you trying to rewrite the story of the prodigal son?

I know it's hard to believe but trust me the little I mentioned here is a slice of heaven compared to the full story, I live in denial myself because I don't understand this level of wickedness.

sulakishop:
Signs of maturity...
Try and be financially secured sha

Thanks, I'll learn skills while at it.

Gloriagee:
Is he your biological dad or step dad?

biological, he once told me that before I was born he hated me, I didn't understand how you could hate an unborn child so I asked my mom what he meant and she said her pregnancy with me was one of the most difficult times she experienced as they was so much challenge back then, he used to beat her up even though she was pregnant, until I grew up and he saw I'm now capable of beating him up as well so he stopped using her as a punching bag, so it didn't start today, but yes he's my biological dad.

chatinent:
[sup][/sup]

Since I can verily relate to your situation based on real life experience, I will advise you:

1. Work and save money as soon as possible and relocate. Peace of mind is life.

2. Such types of fathers cannot change, esp when they have recruits of supporters backing their [bad] actions so they don't know when to stop.

3. About the curses, it won't work if you don't want it to subdue you. How? Get up and work! Can you write? Can you create websites? Can you program or design? What can you do that people would need to buy your time to do? I could teach you how to make money online for free so you can start earning for yourself and build a good life.

4. I'm sorry for your mom's demise. It's okay to grief, but face the reality and don't run away from it.

5. The best way to revenge is to be successful.

I really appreciate your input. Yes I can design websites with website builders like elementor but that's just the limit of what I know, I don't have anything to fall back on, just the will to survive at all cost because they're waiting for me to die as well, I'd appreciate if you can teach me, I'm ready to learn whatever it is to support myself, thanks in advance.

We're our own enemies, the ripping is merciless now no one cares.

Without saying too much, I loved my mum dearly and I was providing for her and fending for her until she died recently, when she died I was the only one with her and no one cared, her husband is alive and he had beef with her, and I took her side while my other siblings took his side, when she died it felt like I lost the battle because they iced me out, said I bet on the wrong side and let me carry my cross alone, now she's gone I'm alone in this world and none of them talks to me, I feed myself, clothe myself and do every other things myself, difference is we still live together in a family house, he doesn't own the house though, I could be sick and indoors for a whole week and even die and no one would check on me, sometimes when I had nothing like I'm broke I'm left to get myself out of it alone, at some point I almost died before I could get myself to the hospital, point is I'm in my family house but basically alone in this world, now I'm planing to leave and never be seen again cuz there's no difference I'm basically on my own anyway, and yes I have considered reconciliation but this man is evil reincarnated, someone who stood in front of my door and cursed me for hours because of 400# that's how terrible he is and when my mum died he almost had a party to rub my nose in it, if I start talking about him it won't end, so reconciliation isn't an option, I'd like to cut him off as he's diabolic and the way he constantly talks about me and the anger and jealousy in him boils he's doing everything so I don't succeed, he keeps telling me life will always be hard for me, and I'll never progress in life, I feel I need to leave the hostile environment so I can succeed in life as nothing grows in the midst of such hate and diabolical actions, secondly I don't want to die suddenly like my mum who was okay in the morning and died in the evening from simple headache.

I got a considerable sum of money recently, and since this doesn't happen often I want to be very careful with it, I have few things in mind to use the money for but I'm not sure so I need advice.

First thing I thought of doing is, getting a car, not for showing off or anything but for mobility mostly

Second, I thought of buying a good smart tv and a gaming console so I can create gaming content and stream gameplay vids with the aim of earning with it.

Third, Buy crypto and stocks I can manage over the years, I'm not very good at investments so I would play it safe to the best of my abilities

Fourth thing is to create a gaming shop, make it nice and conducive with air-conditioning and fridge filled with refreshments, where people come to pay and play video games so I can have a business at least, so advice me.

JOACHINpedro:
Which women?
Imagine having a butt bigger than your babe's

This is because of the comment section I saw, shey u no sabi read, everyone drooling were women.

I saw this video on Facebook and it's this guy cooking with his back facing the camera, now what put me off at first was his short, isn't that supposed to be a girl short? And the butt cheeks, it really disgust me, then I got the biggest shocker when I checked the comments, most of the girls were drooling, the other half were saying nyash wey I suppose get, God carry am give man, should guys even have big butts, cuz I don't, then how is he breathing in that pant?

I have been celibate for almost a year and it's beginning to affect me, I swore never to patronize a call girl in my life but the last girl I was with is playing games with me and I don't want to crawl back to her, I don't watch porn, and I don't know how to masturbate, would it be wrong if I use some high class hookup girl to ease my cravings, and how do I even get one, since they don't write it on their forehead, she'll be treated with utmost respect and I would even make sure she's comfortable.

It's almost here

Balablue64:
You are a scammer

ok bro, peace.

Training is Sunday, live session, no bs

Training is Sunday, live session.

I have been on the survey platform for a while and I have made some money off it, the plan was to be milking it alone until it doesn't work anymore, but after a while I feel I should share.

Surveys on this platform pay from 5-50$ per survey, you just need to learn the way to do those surveys, which I would show you in a Google meet class, I wouldn't go into much details here for obvious reasons, you should join the group and get more insights into what it involves then decide if it's worth your while, I'd be exposing more screenshots of my earnings there too.

we all know Nigerians don't value free information, so this would come at a little fee, something that isn't much but would make you feel like you paid for it so you'd take it seriously, I only need 20 serious people so it won't cast, below are some earnings, you'd see more later.

https:///+ryXOTvZx17JmYWY8

FFF241:
Yep!! Na dem dem. RUN RUN RUN

Lol I wish you hadn't said this, discourage others because you're what you are, can't you just ignore, I'm trying to help, go through my profile, I don't support scamming, very old nl moniker that is well known, you think I'd risk that for whatever?

I have been on the survey platform for a while and I have made some money off it, the plan was to be milking it alone until it doesn't work anymore, but after a while I feel I should share.

Surveys on this platform pay from 5-50$ per survey, you just need to learn the way to do those surveys, which I would show you in a Google meet class, I wouldn't go into much details here for obvious reasons, you should join the group and get more insights into what it involves then decide if it's worth your while, I'd be exposing more screenshots of my earnings there too.

we all know Nigerians don't value free information, so this would come at a little fee, something that isn't much but would make you feel like you paid for it so you'd take it seriously, I only need 20 serious people so it won't cast, below are some earnings, you'd see more later.

https:///+ryXOTvZx17JmYWY8

seguno2:
Before we advise you, please confirm if she is Nigerian or not, in view of your thread below.

When the desired isn't available, the available becomes the desired, hope you catch my drift.

Dpaulie:
I can but honestly I can't help
I'm sorry
I don't know u
This is a faceless forum where u don't know who's who

ok

bensky:
I met my husband ( An European) never been married , no kids currently 45 years through an interracial dating site, he sent me a message October ,2019 of his intention based on my profile and qualities I was looking for . He asked certain question, can i drive, my profile already says I'm independent, I am open to relocation etc. he came to Nigeria in 2021 we got married. I moved to join him October this year . before him the first guy i met was an American 40 years divorced with 2 kids and doesn't want kids anymore. we met in Dubai April 2019 Easter . we remained friends since he doesn't want kids.

Your response would have been helpful if you named the interracial dating site, that's the essence of the thread right?

kaycome:
I don't think anything is wrong in having a desire for biracial kids. But my concern is are you looking for someone to love or someone to help you japa from nigetia via marriage. If it is the former then you don't need to limit your looking to caucasian ladies. Marry to build a godly home and kids. Infact you might have a lady close to you right now trying to get you attention but since your mind is already fixated on oyinbo, you may miss God's best. My wife is an American. We met through my Aunty who lives in usa. I never for once in my life desire to marry an American. No desperation while we dating. I was just trusting God for a life partner and gbam i giot the most amazing lady i ever met. She will be here with me in Nigeria today and we will celebrate our one year wedding anniversary this month. Cheers

We can stay in naija if she wants, I'm not after money or japa, I want what I want, if you can help me with one I'd love it.

BloomingDale:
I don’t know why you want your kids to inherit recessive and animal DNA. You are carbon based, they are sulphur based. Hope your kids won’t spontaneously combust as the UVC and UVB rays are increasing. Check out how white/biracial people can spontaneously combust.

you watch too many sci-fi movies.

franchasofficia:
Start a relationship blog on an international blogging platform


Through this way, I met hundreds if not thousands of real foreign ladies from all continents of the world, many fell in love with me from afar but I never fancied marrying a foreigner because I know people that did and at old age, it doesn't always end well cos most will never want to retire back to Nigeria with you, and even your kids are likely to deny you and Nigeria and adopt their mother's country.


When I weighed these options, I had to stand my ground and rejected all of them I met even though one from Australia refused to let go and this was when I was still struggling financially and she was ready to file for us to relocate to Adelaide together, I couldn't imagine myself marrying a white lady and she being my sponsor. I have ego a lot, I have always prayed and wished to be completely in charge of my marriage financially, and when I read their stories they shared with me about their past relationships and culture, I knew I cant cope.



So my advice is if you are good in writing, start a relationship blog on foreign blogging platforms that will give you international audience and from there start publishing books on relationships online. From there you will meet a lot of foreign ladies genuinely interested in marrying black guys but make sure you are truly ready to marry a white lady cos it's not always as easy as you may think considering our cultural difference and family style.



Yes mixed kids do look adorable, I cherished them too growing up, and wished to have one but as I grew older, got more exposure and life experiences, I realized it was all a child fantasy. And I thank God, I am happily married now and my kids look so adorable you might mistake them for mixed kids. I married a Naija hot chick though

All this na hardwork, abeg post about me and anyone interested should link up

Dpaulie:
If I had known you well and your intention, I could introduce u to one( maybe older though) but fear who no fear Nigerian youths
Yahoo! Yahoo! Intentions everywhere

Please, please sir, my intentions are really pure, I want to get married asap, and I really love to end up with a white person, please help if you can.