₦airaland Forum

Your dollar rate;is that for buying or selling?

Whats current exchange rate

From Black Market?

Looking for easimoni? Oga don ban am for here.

Go to newnigerians.com

Small time dem go ban me too

@Invisible-  I dey front seat for Betaglass already, I just wan confirm the available refreshments on board!

I dey go back to diaspora!

I accompanied Pres. Carter on his trip here!    Ak, pls shine candle on TransXpress and Betaglass

Fellow diasporeans on a summer   visit to the homeland. How do you do?  Its great to have dual-nationality!

@Gabza,

I have received higher calling, hence I relinquish the title of thread jester to you. All the best!

Hurray, pictures are back!

Too little too late?

Iwerebor:
thanks loma
received.
The exodus has begun.

See as this man wan take implicate me. Exodus ke, na new testament me I dey read o!

MyPeace:
wetin dey happen today,abi the bears don kill every body for floor.

marco74:
is that the end of this forum then??omoba et al make una let us wey never receive de mail know o!

Na rapture happen. Na only us sinners dey left behind

@Jide,

You sense whiff of money and completely forgot your email address?

Tell me , whats your name?

@texas et jide, u too like story

Omoba. Na u fit!  Who heard of the son of the ruler being tried for treasonable--------

E be like say we dey do IPO of email addresses. See as silent readers just pop out of nowhere. Now that you have identified yourself, the news is that you will now be charged N100 for every page you read.

Dont run away o!

The drama at Wema Bank plc over alleged insider abuse climaxed yesterday with the arrest in Abuja of Adebisi Omoyeni, a former group managing director of the bank by the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC).

He was flown to Lagos and may be charged for forgery and stealing.
According to the EFCC, Omoyeni is being investigated for allegedly stealing N450 million from Wema Bank.
An assistant commissioner of Police with the Special Fraud Unit (SFU), Olusola Amore, made this known to newsmen yesterday in Lagos.
Amore said Omoyeni was arrested based on a complaint by the Nigerian Deposit Insurance Corporation (NDIC), to the effect that he conspired with the former secretary of the bank, Biodun Ogunlade, to steal the amount.
Omoyeni’s travail began third week in January when he was directed to proceed on indefinite leave by the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN), following what was described as “weighty allegations” of fraudulent activities.
http://www.businessdayonline.com/national/6941.html

It is surprising to know that the top 5 equities posted an average return of 1698.7 per cent in just a year! These equities are AFROIL, ALUMACO, COSTAIN, SCOA and MORISON. The import of this on the investment clime in Nigeria is that, an investor who channeled N1million in March 2007 on any of the above equities will be worth more than N17million by March 2008!


The best time to buy anything is always last year!

Open Letter to Seun Osewa, the CEO,MD and Owner of NairaLand

I believe I speak on behalf of the over 250 visible members of this thread (the 700 Club) and the thousands of silent moneybags who only surface when emails need to be sent, or goodies are being shared!

We appreciate the effort you have put into making this site our 2nd home (at the risk of losing our first homes),and this thread our 2nd office at the risk of our day jobs.

We acknowledge that in the past few weeks,heralding the approach of the bears, some area-boys mis-spoke(apology to the hillarious people here), and hence you had to clean up the thread, and lock it for some time.

We are glad that you have now reopened the thread as some of us were beginning to have withdrawal symptoms.

However, as our elders say, if we buy a shirt for a lazy man, we need to also buy trousers for him (na proverb o, I no fit call my homies lazy o).

In that wise , you need to realize that this thread has gone beyond  being a past-time to becoming a forum where money is made (and lost ), where ideas are exchanged, where NSE language is developed,and where the next great thing is primed to happen.

We have progressed from only writing to visual analysis through the celestial candles of Aktopgun, ably supported by the trio of Ijogbon(see name ),Londoncool, and Pumice.

We have become used to the graphical artistry of moi (trying to be humble ), and the daily attachements of bid/offers from Kpineo and Naijadr.

In summary , for us to continue to populate this thread and site, we need the following without delay.( we no fit threathen a whole CEO ke!, we dey take style beg una)

(1) Appoint the likes of easimoni,yodiyokun and frakiriri as moderators. (anyone wey no gree na bears go chop their money!)

2) Return the rights we had to upload pictures and attachements

If these are done, we will be very grateful and may even give you free stock tips (like avoiding cashcraft!) and help you package this thread for a Private Placement.

If these is not done, you may begin to see people migrating from this site to other places, despite their great affection for this thread,as their portfolios need constant illumination from Aktopgun's candles, and their teeth need frequent exposure to Loma's cartoons.

I write all these hoping your honourable self (unlike the House of Assembly folks) will dignify this thread with your written presence(na u get first post for the thread sef) and agree to the above requests.

On behalf of all Nairaland Stockmarketers
Loma

Ramblings of an Airline agent

I work in a central reservation office of an airline. After more than 130,000 conversations--all ending with "Have a nice day and thanks for calling"--I think it's fair to say that I'm a survivor.

It wasn't long before I suffered a direct hit from a woman who wanted to fly to Hippopotamus, NY. After assuring her that there was no such city, she became irate and said it was a big city with a big airport. I asked if Hippopotamus was near Albany or Syracuse. It wasn't. Then I asked if it was near Buffalo. "Buffalo!" she said. "I knew it was a big animal!"

And once a man wanted to go to Illinois. When I asked what city he wanted to go to in Illinois, he said, "Cleveland, Ohio."

Super Salesman
A keen country lad applied for a salesman's job at a city department store. It was one of those massive stores that has every department imaginable. In fact it was the biggest store in the world - you could get anything there.
The boss asked him, "Have you ever been a salesman before?" "Yes, I was a salesman in the country," said the lad. The boss liked the cut of him and said, "You can start tomorrow, Friday morning, and I'll come and see you when we close up."

When the boss looked up the young man the next day at closing time, he saw him shaking hands with a beaming customer. After they parted, he walked over and asked, "Well, that looked good! How many sales did you make today?" "That was the only one," said the young salesman. "Only one!?!" blurted the boss. "Most of my staff make 20 or 30 sales a day. You'll have to do better than that! Well, how much was the sale worth?"

"Two hundred twenty seven thousand, three hundred thirty four dollars and change," said the young man. The boss paused for a moment, blinking a few times. "H, H, How did you manage that?!?" "Well, when he came in this morning and I sold him a small fish hook. Then, I sold him a medium hook, and then a really large hook. Then I sold him a small fishing line, a medium one, and then a big one. I then sold him a spear gun, a wetsuit, scuba gear, nets, chum, coolers, and a keg of beer.

I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast. We decided he would probably need a new boat, so I took him down to the boat department and sold him that twenty-foot schooner with the twin engines.

Then, he said that his Volkswagon probably wouldn't be able to pull it, so I took him to the car department and sold him the new Deluxe Cruiser, with a winch, storage rack, rustproofing, and a built-in refrigerator. Oh, and floor mats."

The boss took two steps back and asked in astonishment, "You sold all that to a guy who came in for a fish hook?!"

"No," answered the salesman. "He came in to buy a blanket."

"A blanket?"

"Yeah, an extra blanket for the couch. He just had a fight with his wife and was sleeping on the couch. I said to him, 'Well, your weekend's ruined, so you might as well go fishing, '"

See how people dey rush Omoba for better thing! If we fit rush enter floor like that, who says we cannot pursue the bears comot?

But na to focus on the stocks wey I get first, once we don comot bears for those ones, we will then move to yours. I promise!

@ Wanajo,

No be my fault, class was boring in those days, so I no too dey pay attention. A fellow drop-out has reminded me that it was a poem, not a rhyme, and the actual words were;

Now the day is over
Night is drawing near
Shadows of the evening
Steal across the sky!

3 months ago, when the elders were warning that the bears would come, and teeth would be gnashed, some people almost had the elders buried alive. Now the bears are here.

Reminds me of the nursery school rhyme we were taught in those days ------

Now that the bulls are over
Bears are drawing near
Blood of the portfolios
Spill across the floor, Amen

Can Nigeria’s Capital Market Support Telecom IPO?
By Okey Nwachukwu

The prospect of a telecommunications firm heading for the capital market to shop for funds to shore up its operations would not be a remote possibility especially with emerging signals that one of the top four will be on the hunt soon.

Based on such deciding factors as subscribers base, geographical spread and visibility, Nigeria’s four biggest telecommunications companies are undoubtedly MTN, Globacom, Celtel and Starcomms, the first three being GSM networks. Other major players operating on the CDMA platform are Intercelullar, Reltel Wireless and Multilinks.

Harnessing various financing options, according to experts and industry players, is a natural choice in this case given the situation requiring the major players to continuously innovate and expand their operations in order to maintain current business levels as well as gain further acreage in a highly competitive marketplace.

Until recently, companies from the banking sector, prompted by the consolidation exercise of the Central Bank of Nigeria in 2005, were regular guests of the capital market to source for long-term funds to reinvigorate and widen the scope of their businesses


http://thepmnews.com/article/955

This one wey we no fit post any pics/attachements no sweet me o!  Seun, na migration u dey see small small be that o! You suppose step up, even if na to dey charge one tasere yearly!  

Stock Market Threads dey different from all those "Marry me, divorce me, he doesnt love me" threads you  have on the front page o!

-------Off I go!

Astrology of Stock Market lies in HOROR SCOPE

Top Ten Tips for Staying Sane in this bearish market


1. Don't panic. Enough people are doing that already; you're needed elsewhere.

2.Don't join the Panic Crowd. They are NOT having more fun, they just act that way to attract new members fold. Misery loves company.

3. Take inventory. Do you have the basic necessities? If so, you are OK. When they come to take away your television remote control, then panic.

4.Smile at your neighbor. A smile lifts everybody's spirits, but most of all your own.

5.Remember the Great Depression. It sucked, but people survived. It's amazing how many non-essentials we take for granted. Rent a movie about the 1930s, sit back, and laugh about how much better our depression is going to be.

6.Learn a new skill. In hard times, it pays to be very, very employable. And you may even be lucky enough to have two jobs. Oh, wait. That's our problem now.

7.Start saving now. Then when the bottom falls out, at least you'll have something to live on for three-and-a-half weeks.

8.Start spending now. It's folks like you, saving all your money instead of spending it, that are killing the economy.

9. Stop listening to people telling you to save or to spend. In fact, stop listening to news about the markets. It's just too depressing.

10.Ignore top ten lists. They are way too gimmicky and seldom give any truly useful information (except for this one, of course!)

As dem no gree make we post picture, enjoy this!


One afternoon an agbero stockbroker was cold calling potential CICOers about a stock and found a taker. "I think this one will really fly said the broker. It's currently only trading at N1 a share."

"Buy me 1000 shares," said the client. The next day the stock had jumped to N2. The client called the broker and said, "You were right about that stock, I'd like to buy 5000 more shares."

The following day the client looked in the paper and the stock had skyrocketed to N4. The client ran to the phone and called the broker, "Get me 10,000 more shares," said the client.

"Wonderful!" said the broker. The following day the client looked in the paper and the stock had reached N9.

Deciding to take advantage of the huge profit he had made in just a few days(on advice from Pumping to lock in some profit), the client ran to the phone and told the broker, "Sell all my shares!"

The broker said, "To who? You were the only one buying that stock."

One more patient for Aktopgun

Krrush:
And what's this "Big Bang" @loma?

Obviously cannot be the Universe's Origin you refer to

The phrase Big Bang, used in reference to the sudden deregulation of financial markets, was coined to describe measures including the abolition of the distinction between stockjobbers and stockbrokers on the London Stock Exchange by the United Kingdom government in 1986.

This change in the rules of the London Stock Exchange occurred on 27 October 1986. Big Bang (never "the Big Bang" was so called because the abolition of fixed commission charges precipitated a complete alteration in the structure of the market. One of the biggest alterations to the market was the change from open-outcry to electronic, screen-based trading.

Other reforms were enacted at the same time, and it was the aggregation of the measures plus the expected increase in market activity that led to the event being called Big Bang.

See WIkipedia for more details

Stockjobbers were institutions that acted as market makers in the London Stock Exchange. Prior to the "Big Bang" in 1986, every stock traded on the Exchange passed through a jobber's book, where they acted as intermediaries between stockbrokers. Immediately prior to the Big Bang, the leading jobbing firms were Akroyd & Smithers, Wedd Durlacher, Pinchin Denny, Smith Brothers, Bisgood Bishop and Charles Pulley.

yodiyokun:
I don't know seuns gmail account - I have volunteered for moderator be4 - he no reply,

Its better to have about 2-3 moderators especcially for this thread, we don't want it to degenerate.

I have sent you an email