₦airaland Forum

Most times, its not necessary. since nobody is perfect, and we are all vulnerable in one way or the other. when you test someone, its like trying to find fault in the person, in most cases. its just like having doubts. cos, when you are sure of whom you are with, there is no need to test the person... some guys and girls are fond of doing it. and its a very risky thing to do. cos, shd the person sent to test ur patener keep persisting, ur partner wil definitely fall sooner or later...

Its never advisable to put your partner to test. Cos, there is every likelihood that he or she might likely fall into the trap. Its just like using bread to set trap for a rat. The rat wil certainly fall for the trap in most cases. Humans are vulnerable. Even the strongest man do have some weakness. & when someone is tested, he's likely to fail the test. And people do this especially when they want to find out how much they are loved by their partner or if he or she is faithful or not. Since we are not perfect & never above mistakes, alot of people usually fail such test. And not a few relationship or marriage have been broken cos of such test... Whenever you are having doubts about your partner, dont test him or her, the best thing to do is to have a heart to heart talk with the person.Know where the fault is coming from, & try find resolutions to the problem.Cos, when you try to dig about something or someone, you're bound to dig up dirt...there is none without a past...whether clean or dirty.

Which is worst; when a girl says she is a virgin but she's not. Or when a girl tells her guy no sex before marriage, but gives it to another guy...such a person is deceitful and as terrible as jezebel...

Some ex are like a shadow, that keeps a tail on you all the time. Even when taking a selfie, you'd be surprised to see them in your pic or behind you each time you look back...they just want to be in your face...either by coming to where you work often, following you about, pestering you with calls, making you feel you cant be happy without them, bugging your friends to talk to you, or by doing the unthinkable. They are usually so reluctant to let go or move on.

Analyse this issue from d standpoint of a guy nd then as a babe.

There are two male friends,one Francis,d other Vincent. Now Francis nd Vincent are close pals. Vin was dating onyinye for a while close to one year before they split. During their relationship,whenever dey had issues,Onyinye wud tell Francis while he calmed her down nd talked to his guy to make peace.

Now they are no longer an item. Vin relocated to calabar cos he got a job there nd has gotten a new babe. While francis resides in lag so do onyinye.

Now this is d funny scenario. At a hangout with friends in lag,onyinye tells francis dat she's attracted to him but she knows francis wont date her cos of his friendship with vin.

Now,after some time. She says if he (francis) cannot date her,let dem have sex. Francis refuses even though he admires her,he feels its wrong.

Cos she was his friend ex. Now vin got a new gurl nd has moved on. What do u think.

Cos francis thinks its betrayal.

WHAT DO U THINK?

When a girl collects money from other guys and spend it on a particular guy. The guy she spends the money on...is the one she loves...

"Women; can't live with them, can't live without them" The above statement made by a dutch priest Desiderius Erasmus says it all. Cos, while some complain about women, others simply cant do without them!

There was an incident that happened some time ago in Lagos, when a married woman had an altercation with another man while coming from somewhere with her husband. While she was abusing the man, her husband came out of their car and also joined her in confronting the man, who was also standing by his car. And before you knew it, the other man and the woman's husband startd fighting, right there in the middle of the road. And when it appeared the other man was gaining the upper hand over her husband, the woman started crying and begging those around to intervene. By the end of the day, her husband had bn beaten black and blue by the time some persons later came to stop the fight. There is nothing wrong in standing up for your woman, but atimes its better to apply wisdom in such situations. Fighting or arguing in public doesnt justify how much a guy loves his woman. But when you are able to handle the situation in matured way shows how responsible, matured and reasonable a man is...

Some girls are fond of looking for trouble with other persons whenever she's with her boyfriend, just to know if he'd be able to defend/support her in public. You see such girls initiating unnecessary quarrels either with another girl or guy, to see whose side her boyfriend would take. And shd her guy fall her hand (doesnt stand up for her or is neural), that could be the end of their relationship. It might not be at that moment, but gradually. Imagine, ur girl suddenly slaping a taxi driver or bus conductor in the presence of her boyfriend, for no reason. May God help the boyfriend if he doesnt support her or join her in insulting the bus conductor. Some girls are like that. In their mind, they will be waiting and expecting their boyfriend to react or join them in their public show of shame. Even when she's at fault...I pity guys. The things we do atimes, cos of love or is it out of stupidity?

The worst thing to happen to anybody, is to lose your boyfriend/girlfriend to someone else right under your nose.The humiliation & pain is usually demoralizing. Especially if it happens at an outing initiated by you. It would look as if you used your own hand to do yourself. Imagine, taking your girl out for lunch, only for another bad guy to start eying ur babe. And if your babe is the irresponsible type, she might end up respondn to his advances by giving him some eye signals. And before u know it, she could suddenly decide to go & ease her herself. My guy, if you are sharp, you better follow her. If not, the other guy would be waiting for her either outside or by the toilet. So as to exchange numbers with her. And shd that happen, that would be the end of your relationship. This scenario is also vice versa. Cos a girl can also lose her guy in the same manner.To avoid such experience, date the right person. Move with a responsible person. Move/be with a lady or guy with dignity

When a couple is about to get married, and one of them suggest or insist on hiring soldiers or naval personnel as part of security measures for the wedding day, my dear its very possible he/she is hiding something or must have hurt, promised and disappointed some persons in the past, who might want to come and spoil or stop the wedding. Thats why its good to make peace with any aggrieved party before walking down the altar with your preferred choice... A lot of couples usually use military personnel to provide security on their wedding day. Why must it be so, if you have nothing to hide? If you havent hurt anybody, you wont be afriad to marry any man or woman of your choice. So, be careful and stop using and hurting people. Cos, revenge is a bitch!

While guys usually like to exaggerate when sharing their experience with girls, most girls tend to subtract or edit their own tales in order not to look bad before others...some of them only talk about the areas that wont tarnish their image or portray them in bad light. Especially when it comes to the issue of sex or dating. Some girls are fond of saying "he tried to, but we didnt do anything" whenever they are sharing an experience with their friends or with a new guy. They hardly open up. And they do so, cos of their gender and cos of the society. While guys exaggerate or brag about their own exploits, just to show off, even if the guy wasnt able to hook up with any girl. This is very common with alot of guys. And ironically, while most guys want to be seen as a player, girls like potraying themselves as responsible girls even when the reverse is the case...people are so conscious of how others see them, and yet they keep doing things that will portray them in bad light!

Rily? Mmanuu, far from it. There are girls who do this, and they dont have any regret while doing it.

Yeah. Even when she is at it with another guy, your calls or bugs will only add to the fun for them...so, why bother yourself. biko let such girls go

This advice goes out to all guys. Whenever you are suspicious of your girlfriend's movement, stop calling her all the time to know where she is...What if she's in the arms of another guy or even in bed with him having fun? Do you think calling her line at that moment would prevent or stop her from cheating on you? Stop worrying yourself and having HBP
for nothing...when she's in that mood or about to cheat on you, calling her line, wont stop her nor make her change her mind. Cos her mind and body is already made up...as a guy, if you are guilty of doing this, biko stop wasting your time. Cos, such a girl is not for you...dont kill yourself or have high blood pressure cos of a woman. if you dont love yourself, think about your family. And apart from making the guy look insecured, it will also make him look needy and desperate. If your girl wants to cheat on you, she will! No matter what you do or say.

‪I feel so bad reading and seeing the way Nollywood actress Ini Edo has been washing her dirty linen in public after breaking up with her husband. She's just one of many who are guilty of sleeping around while married. Such married ladies still see themselves as girlfriends. Most of whom are known to lie, cheat or double date while in a relationship. And tend to carry such bad and shameful habits into their marriage. That's what has happened to Ini Edo, and many like her. Who can't stop flirting/sleeping around even while in a relationship or married. Such girls change or date different guys in every season or in every six months. They say yes to every fine or rich dude that comes their way. And before you know it, they've started sleeping with the new guy. What a slut! A lot of ladies are like that. They just want to have fun, find a rich dude, get married and live a comfortable life, with such a heart or lifestyle. They are only building a house without a foundation!

Most women would prefer their husband moving/hanging out with married men instead of single guys. Most of whom are generally seen to be weird, randy or promiscuous. Not that some married men aint like that, but single men are more prone to such lifestyle, that's why most married women don't like seeing their hubby hang out with unmarried guys/friends, so that their 'bad' lifestyle wont rub off on them... They feel such guys or friends would be a bad influence on their husband. But come to think of it, boys will always be boys. Even when he's with his mother, he'd still want to go out and play with his friends, no matter the restrictions...and the same thing applies to most married men...

Imagine a lady doing all she could to win over the mother of her boyfriend/fiance while dating him. But immediately she's married to the guy, you see her start treating the mother of her husband(mother in law) like an outcast. Some ladies are like that. Whenever they want something (especially if they want to hook down a guy), they play the good, responsible & obedient girl. And whenever she accompanies her guy to see his mother or family, she becomes an angel, smiling, noding or helping the mother to do this & that. Sometimes, she might even buy things for her guy's mother just to make her/his family like and accept her. & also see her as a decent girl good enough for her son. But once the guy marries her, dont be surprised to see her displaying another character entirely. By showing her mother in law/the rest of them who the real madam of the house is. A lot of girls do this before getting married. But such deception is not good,& do have repercusions at the end.

@Arva, yeah, you are right. When a girl is an adult, its none of her mother's biz if she is a virgin or not. But, every mother would be happy and proud to know that her daughter was met a virgin by her husband on her wedding night. being a virgin is a thing of joy and pride to every girl and mother...na society dey spoil girls

Atimes, I used to wonder why most girls lie about their virginity...I find it somehow absurd when I hear or see girls lying about their virginity especially to their mothers. A lot of girls pretend and make their
parents believe they are still virgins even when they've actually lost count of the number of guys they've slept with. There was a girl who wasnt a virgin when she got married, but had to beg her fiance to lie to her parents that he met her a virgin. In order to conceal her shame and also make her parents be proud of her. Imagine? I just dont understand. If a girl craves so much to remain a virgin till her wedding night and be regarded, then why indulge in endless pre marital sex with guys? If you know you cherish being a virgin, then why not wait till the right time. Why pinch from what would eventually be yours?

We do have girls who control their boyfriends. Some use their natural wits while others might be using juju on their guy. Imagine having a girl tell her guy, what to do, and how to behave in public whenever they are together. Making a fool of him indirectly. Dont know why some guys allow such tins to happen? Is it cos of love or due to sex/physical appeal of the girl. Just recently, I was at a place, and saw a guy walked in with a beautiful girl by his side. Whom I guess is his girlfriend. The way the guy was at her beck and call, made alot of people there to wonder if
he was under a spell. The girl kept showing off, and even flirting openly with two other guys there. By working up and down the place, pretending to be looking for what to buy. And wherever she went, you find the guy tagging along like her toy. She made the tall guy shrinked beside her. Intimidating him even in public. I felt bad for the guy, and for guys in such situation. Biko, such girls are mean, and confirmed heartbreakers. Biko, if your girlfriend is like that, move on. cos such a girl is not for you.And if its not due to love, sex or physical appeal of the girl, some guys might also be doing it, out of fear of losing the girl to other guys. He might feel doing that or being like that (acting the fool) would make the girl not to leave him. Imagine? Such thoughts are wrong. Cos, no matter what a guy does for a girl, if she wants to leave the guy, she will. And truth be told, there is no girl that can not be tamed, even if the girl is like a lion...except the guy loves being harrassed, embarrassed, insulted, intimidated and treated/talk to anyhow by his girlfriend, thats when such things are allowed to happen....

Most young girls are reluctant to get married until after they must have enjoyed life or have enough fun. Many of them feel getting married at that age do have some disadvantages. Especially if the groom is also young. There are bound to be some problems btw them, which normally a matured couple may not experience. Being inmature could work against a young wife or couple. Since, the girl is yet to see the world, get exposed or do those things girls her age usually do. Failure to chop life small before getting married, could make her become somehow
difficult to handle by her hubby, since that youthful exuberance would be there. One young girl said the same thing, that she doesnt want to get married now. Cos she wants to enjoy herself first, date enough guys and also party enough before finally settling down. Cos if she doesnt do any of these, there's the tendency for her to be unfaithful or unruly to her husband when she's married. Cos once a girl gets married, she wont be able to do any of those things again. That's why to most young girls, its better to do it now, than do it later or never. But truth be told, if a girl doesn't do any of those things, will she die?

#peoplelikethem...got a shocker the other day when a married lady said if it was possible or allowed, alot of women wont mind marrying more than one husband...said it would help curb the issue of adultery/infidelity among women. Biko, i beg to disagree, cos anybody that wants to cheat or be unfaithful would still be, no matter what. Not to talk of legalizing adultery...tufiakwa. Abeg, perish such thought. I m for one man, one woman. Any other arrangement na sin/abomination....

Any man who still chases/sleep with other women or girls after getting married, shouldn't be in a marriage but in a LovePeddler-house!

Any lady that carries her fake or lying habit into her marriage is still a girlfriend!

Some people always like to take their revenge at that particular moment they're offended, especially when its very hot. They usually don't have the patience to wait or take their revenge at the right time or at a better time, if they have to. Forgetting that revenge is best served when its cold. Just like when a girl catches her boyfriend cheating on her. She gets so angry at that moment, ready to explode, fight or break the guy's head right there and then. Some might even vow to deal with the guy for hurting her. Just like what happened some years ago, when the girlfriend of a neighbor tried using me to take her revenge on her boyfriend for cheating on her. She came at me twice, and tried to make me sleep with her so as to get back at her guy. But I dodged her, and avoided her like a plague when I saw what she was up to. I did that, cos I wasn't brought up like that. She and the guy later made up. But they are no longer together. Some girls are like that. Whenever their boyfriend hurt them or cheat on them, you see them taking their revenge to the extreme either by sleeping with someone else, the brother of her boyfriend, his friend, cousin or even with his father. Which is very gross. Cheating on someone for cheating on you, is not only petty, but dirty! And it makes you look like a LovePeddler. Just like the partner that cheated on you. Why not leave him or her to Karma. It may take a while, but Karma will surely take its course someday, somehow.

Most of us dont really know what we want in a relationship. a lot of people are so confused and distracted...

‪They say, if you love someone you should let him/her free, that if its yours he/she would definitely come back to you. Just like when a bird is let out of a cage to see the world. Most times, you find the bird returning to the owner. But in Naija, you may never get to see that bird again. With all the go slow, distractions, peer pressure, sharp shooters, bad influence and wicked hearts here and there, you might never get to see or have the person again once he/she is allowed to go or let loose. Cos, things usually don't work the same way for everyone. All one is left with are just memories of the past, souvenirs or an aching heart. For in life, love is hardly fair most times...

Done!

@ NnamdiN & emmyw, Its a pity most people only judge a book by its cover without reading the content. You should have atleast read the post before jumping to conclusion. I never said what she did was wrong. Its her life and her money. I'm just wondering why a lot of people are making a lot of noise about it. So, read before you conclude.