₦airaland Forum

NoToPile:
Not that read and understand my post.

2 major points

1.He already had an agreement with her that they wont consumate the marriage till after the church wedding. HE AGREED.

2. If you are going to go through two or three marriage types, try and finish all before you consumate. Trad wedding alone plus registry plus a pastor blessing you is okay but if you still want a full service of solemnization of holy matrimony then I believe you should wait, what are you now solemnizing after the marriage has been consumated. I feel its a sort of deception and jamboree, I didnt have a church wedding personally beacuse we didnt want to but if we did we would have waited till after the church wedding. My 2nd point is talking as a christain. This is why I dont support long time between trad and church Wedding, do the trad and do a small solemnization weeks apart. It avoids all this mess. I am talking based on the assumption that the couple to be are celibate but as it seems everyone is having sex before marriage nowadays( which I know is not true) well it seems irrelevant.
2nd point is my personal opinion as a christain.


Either way the OP should keep to his agreement.

I agree with you on the fact that an agreement was made and it should be adhere to..
buh listen the white wedding most of Y'all are saying is compulsory is a traditional marriage for whites that was passed down to US as colonies not that it is recognized by God if it is please show me where in the Bible .God is not one that creates confusion..
he created different races and different cultures and in each of these races and cultures all have different marriage rite's and none is better than the other as far as the family agrees on your Union and the bride price is paid your married it's we blacks that seems to be overzelous and ignorant..
you can do a traditional wedding without doing White buh you can't do white without doing traditional no church will wed you

ctleurocollege:
Proverbs 3:6 'Remember the Lord in everything you do, he will show you the right way'

now I know you're confused..
how does that relate to white wedding..

festusforchrist:
Hebrews 13:4 KJV
Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.

Count yourself among the lucky guys with the privilege to marry a woman that has the fear of God in this endtime. Please go are fix your wedding and count us for prayers.

so in your words they are not married

Nnemuka:
Who knows what he wants to do
Trap her with Traditional whatever, impregnate her, then claim she isn't a virgin, and dump her.

Men do it alot here
They come after you, begging you to get pregnant and before you turn left they wont be in sight anymore.
ndi uchu ......
These women that you tagged baby mamas actually started this way...

Bia Op, only thunder will fire u if you dont fo ahead and fix the white wedding
virgin gbuo gi there

. will a White wedding prevent all these

ctleurocollege:
What sort of question is this? Those vows made during church wedding is it for the British or to God?

so anybody that doesn't make a vow before the church is not married..
please show me I the Bible

WriterX:
you do know even the whites most of em don't go to churches to Wed and yes it's still termed a white wedding.

the idea of white wedding for a Christian is the legal bounding of a man and a woman before the altar of God by a priest or a pastor in a view you can say this is a religious white wedding .

please show me where in the Bible that says white wedding is the real wedding..
you do know that white wedding is also a traditional wedding to White's ..
do you still know we have different races and culture's so if Asians Indians africans don't conform to another race way of life
then they are not right In the sight of God

ctleurocollege:
Traditional wedding was done for traditional African religious practitioners, how can a Christian refuse to marry in Church?

who own white wedding is it God or the British

ctleurocollege:
This is how you will lose a good woman because of your dicck. What's stopping you from doing the White wedding if you're a true Christian?

how does being a true Christian relate to white wedding

GoddonBishop:
Looking at it critically, traditional marriage is not recognised internationally as legal and bidding. To this end therefore you are not yet married bro.

point of correction it is after the traditional marriage go to a registry sign the cert your finished..
and they are married in the eyes of GoD and man..
let me ask you do you think hindu marriage is recognized

PEPPERified:
Her stance is correct and I really respect her. marriage is a covenant. She understands that when that covenant is cut before God they way it should be, he backs up the covenant. As it is, the covenant you have is cut before the tradition of the girls'people, it is up to you to decide who the 3rd cord that binds your marriage should be. God or the devil.

in other words people that just stick with traditional marriage Don't have a covenant with God buh the devil..

Polyurethane:
Tradition my foot.
The girl is a good Christian, it's hard to see someone like her this days,
God only recognize White Wedding,
Traditional Wedding is not necessary in Christendom.
The Husband should have done the White Wedding first, he's foolish.
The WHITE GOWN is the symbol of virgin, purity.
The woman is not married as far as God is concern

this is the second most stupid statement have seen on this thread

dochenaj:
I can't believe you cannot wait for few months till the church wedding is done.

Your wife is a virgin and that is a goldmine in the society today, appreciate that.

If you want to have a great sexual experience with your wife for the rest of your life, wait for the wedding night. If you coax her into doing it earlier it is tantamount to rape and she will never enjoy sex with you ever again. Do you want that?

Though I blame your wife for agreeing to marry someone that did not rigidly share her biblical views on premarital sex.

define premarital sex

Mommadd:
Nairaland is not just the place to seek some kind of advice from as it will leave you more confused at the end end of the day.
The first issue I see here is you both that have same belief, note I do not mean you both are not Christians, while your wife is a born again christian who believes in the chastity of marriage, you on the other hand are probably just someone who goes to church and do not take Christian doctrines seriously, the Bible said "marriage is honourable in all and the bed undefiled". For someone who truly knows God and understand the scriptures, until your marriage is sealed in God's presence, you are not yet married.
My advice is, if u know you cannot continue to respect her faith in God, is better to find someone who does not see anything wrong with sex before marriage so she can also go to someone who believes exactly what she believes in. Mind you, if this is not sorted out properly and you go ahead with the wedding, issues like this will continue to arise, so is better you both handle it to your satisfaction before going ahead.
The singular fact that she told you from the very beginning should have made calm down
Truth is, not every girl who said am a virgin is scam at the end of the day.

show me the scripture in the Bible that backs this

salt1:
Thanks so much! I blame the girl for accepting to marry someone who doesn't share her godly principles. I guess she was desperate to answer Mrs.
See him exposing her and her value system to ridicule.
I hope this is a fake story. But if it's real, she will learn a bitter lesson on how not to be unequally yoked together with an unbeliever.
My spouse and I chose to honour God by waiting until after we have stood before God, said our vows before God and man, and received the blessings of family, friends and the elders of the Church. We have a very happy home.

show me the place in the Bible that backs white wedding and denounces traditional

Macon1212:
She is right you just have to wait until wedding it's unbiblical to have sex before you are join together in church. She is not hiding anything. I was unable to have sex with my wife after traditional engagement until after wedding. Be patient man and in no time you will be good

show me the place in the Bible that says anything about church wedding..
you guys will just be turning the Bible upside down..
who created church wedding is it God or the British

Guest007:
That's fine... But they are sex less husband and wife until the church wedding. I hope he doesn't ruin his marriage before it starts. If I was her, I would look at him so differently. If he's not careful, he'll get his refund and an invite to her church wedding.

what if the church wedding takes another 6 to 7 months worst if the OP doesn't have the money for it.. would you still tell the OP to compromise and put in mind he's human and he has he's own limits..
so OP will just be initiated into the Vaseline crew just like that

stormborn28:
she doesn't get wet at close range

their sex life Sha is gonna be boring as fvck

Guest007:
What if... This girl had a dream for her first night. What if this whole thing is all she lived for? What if she pictured her first night with her husband in her own special way.

If you read the op... She made it very clear which wedding night she meant. Op said he never took her seriously, to chop new pussy is messing up his integrity and his character. I really feel bad for the girl... So much shame and drama for the night she waited for while op treated STD up and down

hahahahahaha ..
your wicked..
I do understand what you mean this might have been her fantasy her Cinderella story...
but I think you need to still look at the OP side even for a little while ..an agreement is agreement whether OP took it seriously or not buh body nor fire it's blood that runs through he's veins and from the look of things the white wedding ain't coming anytime soon
one of them will have to make a compromise buh the truth is this they are already married..
my fear for OP is that he's sexual life is already fvcked up

Guest007:
I don't care about all this... I'm focused on the op. What other people do or don't do has nothing to do with this issue op has. His future wife is of the opinion that church wedding is as important and maybe a little more for HER

How are you guys not getting this? Op is in the wrong because he accepted her wishes and now... This! Op is in the wrong and I hope she stands her ground.

Men have left many wives after traditional weddings and crossed the road to marry their new catch at her church because tradition gives more room than a church wedding.

Tbh, I don't understand your statistics, going by nairaland, you'd think only Nigerians are Christians

if both the OP agreed that until their wedding night and she specified that is the white wedding tman agreement is an agreement..

I asked someone this question here..
if I can dump you after traditional marriage what prevents me from dumping you after white wedding for your info and traditional marriage also have a marriage certificate

tradepunter:
Mr Hot potty, I have paid bride price so come lemme ram you. Don't defile the purity of your marriage.. That white gown of your wife means purity, not touched so if you know what's good for you keep it that way.

You think it's all about been a Christian? If you like don't ask for the Holy Ghost to come into your life and strengthen you devil will us you play ten ten..

Your job should be engaging God as you have taken a step the devil is all too very very happy to destroy... May the Lord grant you wisdom

what do you mean by him not defiling the purity of he's marriage when they are already married in the eyes of God and man..the white gown means purity so is every girl that wears it that's pure abi..
most you take Christianity to another level

sharone21:
My QUESTION is: Are you REALLY a CHRISTIAN or just attracted to a born again virgin? Have u not heard of people who did only traditional weddings, slept with their brides and impregnated them( since the lady would believe you are already her husband) only to be dumped?

if you believe this your statement then your really gullible..
if I can dump you when have done the traditional marriage what stops me from still dumping you after white wedding..

Guest007:
I'm neither xtain nor Nigerian but common sense dictates that xtains marry in a church or by a pastor of some sort... I don't understand this mixture of culture, traditions, and religion. They are 2 different things.




The end story is this girl said no sex before marriage and that means a church marriage FOR HER

your not Nigerian that sums it all up..
let me tell you this if I where go by what you said that means more than 50% of Nigerian Christian's ain't married by your analogy..

and yes they are two different things buh the traditional marriage is main thing in Nigeria 98% of Churches won't wed you without you doing the traditional marriage..
buh you can do the traditional marriage and nobody will give a damn whether you do white or not


if you don't know white wedding isn't our culture is just borrowed and the white wedding isn't even recognized in the Bible buh the traditional is

Guest007:
If you're Christian then the church is the REAL marriage, the traditional isn't Christian. She's a born again so how does tradition become more important than her church?

Op is the problem.

your joking right...
cause if you're not then this is one most stupid statements have seen..
in you're analogy people that just stick with traditional marriage are not married in the sight of God..

NoToPile:
But you were the one that said in your post that you had asked her initially and she had said no sex till AFTER CHURCH WEDDING and you agreed, so whats all the fuss about now.

You agreed so why back out of the agreement, the fact that you had known what to expect before hand is the issue, its not a matter of whether we should consumate the marriage after trad or not.



To my personal opinion about the matter as a christain, do the church wedding as planned and consummate the marriage thats all, I believe the marriage should be consummated after all wedding/marriage procedures you planned for have been completed, if you want to do trad only do and consummate your marriage but if you have planned for church wedding just wait till the whole stuff is over.
This is the major reason I dont support all these do traditional marriage now, do church wedding in 6 months time, that is what is causing all this back and forth arguments. If it was 2 weeks interval all this wont crop up. But op if you are not really a christain you can ignore this 2nd paragraph.

let me understand something you don't support traditional marriage that's your way..
buh you support white wedding that isn't your own..
if am wrong tell me cause a nigga is confused

Iamsegzy25:
Oga shut up

which line up, hope you're watching the match sha and you can also see Arsenal line up, No Auba No Laca No Pepe No Luiz No Sokra No Tierney No Guendouzi No Xhaka No Leno. should i go on....

Liverpool fans and excuses are 5&6 shior

your a madman check arsenal line up and bench now compare the two..
now stop thinking with your ass and Start with your head

ZombieDestroyer:
So for your little mind..

It's only Okorocha that can give fat envelope?!!

as dumb as you are you still couldn't understand what I meant..
my bad I forgot your dumb

won't mind giving her a good doggy..
one leg on the ground the other on top of the table..make sure she screams my name like banshee

ZombieDestroyer:
Make bitterness no kee you!

Give her more six months and see more juicy endorsements coming her way!

The girl is made and non of you can change it!!

Even the Governor of her state is waiting with fat envelope!!

okorocha is not the governor of imo state

damn she's all grown up...

this guy you wan just turn that girl to confirmed baby mama make I nor talk second child on the way

OP if you give her the white wedding your a big fool that lady is your wife before God and man already.
where you are gonna be a 1st class mo.ron is if she's not a virgin after the white wedding

Saintbusco1:
you want to follow your brother by marrying from a separated home... its not a good idea bro + she can as well separate with you for irreconcilable differences

what type of fvcked up mentality is this..
just because her parents are separated it automatically means Same will happen to her..
are you well




OP if you know you don't want to marry the girl better let her go.. before you start using her parents breakup as a yard stick to marry her or not

wow niggas still fall in love..
just wow..
Op move on and as your moving on cut every contact you have with her for your own sanity..and in your next relationship never let your love be more than your chick..
all this epistle you just wrote show's you love her more than she loves you..
get your act together