₦airaland Forum

Nancee4love:
I AM INLOVE WITH A GUY I AM FAR RICHER THAN.
I need a candid, serious and matured advice. I am a lady of 28yrs I stay in Abuja and work here. I am from south south in Nigeria. I recently moved to an area in Abuja and was thinking of a church to go so I went to a church closer to my house and I enjoy the service and I met this cute dark handsome guy in the church. Althrough the service my attention was on him, his personality and dress sense attracted me to him. I like slim guyz and tall guys because I am tall. So after service I went home, thinking about him and looking forward to Sunday morning to go to church to see my crush. I love the fact that this guy true loves God. One thing led to another we had to start talking and I fell even deeper inlove with him, he is a graduate and works in an IT Media firm. It's been 18 months now we have been talking and we are so fond of ourselves and absolutely we are catching feelings for each other but he has not said anything about relationship yet. I am super convinced that he has no relationship, I asked our pastor stylishly and he told me the guy is not in any relationship. This guy is a keeper, has character, treats me with uttermost respect and value. The way he looks into my eyes makes me know he has a thing in his heart for me. Note I have been to his house severally, he stays in a single studio apartment while I stay in a flat and still he is not intemidated at all. He has never asked me for money at all and never pushed for sex, and we have not had sex. We buy things for each other occasionally, like he reciprocates and appreciates my efforts.
Recently we were discussing and he Opened up to me that his salary is 80,000 and he is seriously thinking of how he can settle down with that and that's his major source of Income apart from other stuff he does. He has a registered company that he is working on already. I can see him pushing and making all efforts to improve himself. Me on the other side I make 250,000 monthly though I have not told him. I truly love this guy and I want to settle with him but on 80,000 naira income monthly. I was thinking could it be the reason why he has not asked me out yet after 18 months.
I told my girlfriends about it not relating or referring to him, my girlfriends, they said I should not settle for less I should look for a man who earns higher.
Please people here are my concerns.
1. I love this guy but he has not said anything about relationship yet, how do I make him ask me out
2. Am I settling for less with 80,000 as his salary, will he abandon family responsibility to me in the future.
3. Should I tell him how much I earn , will he not take advantage of me
4. Should I move on its been 18months but truly my heart is peaceful with him, we laugh we smile we encourage each other and we build each other.
5. Should I follow my girlfriends advice to look for someone who earns higher.
6. There is a guy who has been on my neck for 9 months now he works in NNPC, DPR has a car and comfort but I see a toxic red flag in him that's making me scared of him, yet he won't give up he is from south south as well
7. I spoke with my aunt and she said to me if she has her way she will make sure I never have contact with my girlfriends who don't understand life and who are not ready for marriage. My aunt told me that she feels the guy in my church is my God ordained husband. My mom also said the same thing that the guy is ok but she would have preferred someone from south south. My church guy is from middle belt
8. Many things are running through my mind I know I love him.
THIS ARE THE QUALITIES I LIKE IN HIM
1. He loves God and genuinely Born again Christian
2. He is sincerely and honest person
3. He is sacrificial and gives me listening ears.
4. He is very mature he seniors me with 6-7 yrs
5. He just a calm person and very organized and visionary
Please help me make the right decision by airing out your opinion.
Right now he is the only not too rich guy in my life who I expect him to ask me out and he has not. Other toaster's are super rich and they are on my neck trust me I am pretty beautiful light skin girl.

Your friend is waiting for you to fail and hit him straight with everything in her arsenal. Lead him on and pray to God as well.
That guy might have million dollar company in the oven.

madam stop nagging that guy to death, he loves u for sure but your emotions are everywhere. Men cry too, stop talking too much and listen.

I'm so bored!

boored

Hmmmm girls shall, how long have you been married

Jesu my chest!! She's a beauty to truly behold

obaseki issa goal

Nice pictures, congrats to her.

vickydevoka:
They av been masturbating

lol abi now

Girlwhocares:
Please help me,I'm loosing my sanity everyday!
I'm scared to open up to friends and families because of what they will think or how disappointed or bad i will make them feel,also I'm afraid people will be judgemental about my actions.

I'm not physically and emotional connected with my husband which is affecting our marriage and my well-being, we live as co-tenant,we hardly have any conversation,we do things differently,we share different rooms,no sex for the past 3years!even during courtship and the fist two years of marriage i can account for days we were intimate.

Things are fallen out of place everyday,we have a child together who will be 4yrs and the thought of having another child has not crossed my mind.

I get irritated at everything, i hardly show appreciation towards him even if it means he has done his best,which later i will find myself guilty and try to make up but the spark and connection isn't just there.

Most times,I have a non-challant attitude towards him and everything he does to make me happy.

I feel lonely,bored and incomplete even when I'm 90% sure my husband loves me and always ready to make me happy.

I feel awkward communicating my feelings and thoughts to him because i know i might flare up with anger even when he hasn't done or said anything to warrant it.


Please I have come to this faceless forum to pour out my mind,my heart is heavy,I need someone to talk to,I'm afraid my personal intention of walking out this marriage even when my husband hasn't done anything to deserve this might backfire and has its negative effect on our child.

I honestly dont need anyone to insult me please as I'm going through alots all i need is mature married wo(men) opinions

Thank you for your time.

3yrs without sex!!! I don't understand, then where are you guys getting it from?

Zinny25:
was he sleeping when she cut off his nose I'm a woman but I fear women!

Lol you are confusing me

Talk is cheap, let the government fix the hospital with modern equipment and personnels first.

I have stayed a year plus, i didn't die. Get busy and set goals, sex is overrated.

Davash222:
How is she your girlfriend
She's for community. Stop personalizing community's property. It's embezzlement.

This got me in tears laughing uncontrollably, mehn ur wicked

austino677:
Only old members At least 5yrs membership here

Lol see condition

etibaba:
Odd of 10+

Nice games bro, abeg u fit arrange g.g or 2.5 from today reach Sunday

Village on the beat

Rosarie:
People need to look deep before getting married.
If he was rich when you met him and went broke,
Can you stay,
If you are unable to have kids,can you stay?
If you fight for each other through it all,
Stand and respect each other.
If any was falsely accused and sent to jail,
Can you stay.
So many things,
They both went through a great painful ordeal.
I Remeber when I laboured for days,I was in pain but my hubby was in worse,he was just lost,more scared than I and yet I was the one going through the process.
Some are stronger in some places whilst some are weaker.
You are meant to complete each other.
If you tell each other the deepest hurt can you move past it and be stronger
You get.
Nobody is more hurt here
They both are.
The man feels less of a man.
So many thought on the both of them.
Words will be said .
The woman who was raped may have moved on as a stronger person.
Whilst the man is still stuck on that moment.
What they needed was a good counsellor and to Remeber the word,
Till death do us part.
Marriage is deep.
So many things you can never imagine comes up.
If you both will not stick to each other through the rain and the sun please don't get married.

God bless you for this, you said it all..

Mitocyan:
Lool. All these are famous tricks that have been debunked already.

Debunked by who and where? Reading of mere articles will not do justice to this topic, you need to get into the streets yourself..

[quote author=Mitocyan post=86548758]hupernikao read this too.
Nothing like jazz bruh. We've all been told lies since we were kids. Please check this out to have a glimpse of what I'm saying: https://threadreaderapp.com/thread/1226492424102596609.html
If there was jazz, bet9ja and nairabet would have all folded up today.

I used to think there was jazz too until I did some deep research into the matter. There was a professor of yoruba that exposed the lies of jazz claims from yoruba culture on facebook some years back. He said all those juju are all lies. He had also investigated deep into the matter.

There has been threads upon threads on nairaland to verify these things. It all came out to be a lie. Some people that claim to have jazz for protection against jazz have almost lost their lives in such challenges.

There was a story of one guy that challenge people that he had protection against bullets. So he applied the charm to a goat with full confidence. After the gunshot, the goat bled to death. He was so scared. Fortunately his challenger had human feelings and was smart enough not to test the bullet directly on the guy. If not someone would have gone 6 feet below that day.

I understand you. I was once like you. I strongly thought jazz was real until I began my investigation. Until I saw that most claims of manifestations of jazz were either hearsay or based on trickery.

Even Anini the famous benin armed robber known for his gruesome escapades, when he was caught he said he didn't use anything like jazz for getting his informations on attacking policemen. It was all police insiders given him information. People were so shocked at the story. Because they felt for him to have evaded arrests for so long, he must have been using jazz. So many similar stories like this abound. You can check page on Facebook. They have exposed similar stories like this in the past.

I understand you, it is hard to belive that you have been lied to for so long but please do more research and you will come to the same conclusion.[/quote

Mostimes it's difficult to accept what you don't believe in, I don't need to do any more research, I have had first hand experiences myself.
I served in kogi and we conducted election during my service year, I saw someone slapped with a ring and he became epileptic. We all ran for our lives, people were shot at and nothing happened.

I was at the market some years ago. I saw some guys from the north cutting through themselves with sharp knives and nothing happened but the moment they cut the knife with a rubber slipper it went out.
Can you explain this to me, the trick that was used and everything because I witnessed everything first hand.

Another experience was also during my service, my principal died while making out with a senior student, they were glue to each other. I heard the voodoo was on the girl and its called magun or so, I don't know if j got the spelling right but people from the west knows what i'm trying to spell .

I could on and on, atheist or not there's black magic and if you were in Benin I would have taken you to the palace or anywhere to have a first hand experience maybe that would change your views.

There's black magic, whether u want to accept it or not. Ask around you, u don't need a trip to your village..

Mitocyan:
You are not derailing the thread. No atheist don't belive in black magic or voodoo because all stories on it have been made up through tricky to gain advantage of unsuspecting people.

Then a first hand experience can do the needful

I'm not trying to derail this thread, I'm just curious do atheist believe in black magic or voodoo

She nor fine rara, everybody wan trend...

No matter what you do never beg for someone's love and attention. It's doesn't always end well. Let that guy be, it's painful yes! Feel the pain and heal properly so that you can get closure.. My fear is never the breakup, it's starting all over again.

balqe:
My mum gave her serious warning then she left the next day(she was supposed to stay for a week)

Na wa oh, things dey happen.

balqe:
She was putting my family's pictures inside her bag

Now this is scaring, what did you do after finding out

I nor go play tennis again, virtual sure pass am self