₦airaland Forum

Some areas in a city, town or communities do setup some form of local security like vigilante, night watchers... and so on.

If their is such in your area:

How much do you contribute?
How well do people contribute?
Is it voluntary to contribute? If no
How do you tackle defaulters?
How much are the security paid?
How bad is the situation before the setup? E.g theft, burglary...
Does the security setup really helps?

In my new place I find out they want to form such after a recent robbery incident in the area. And I think it looks somehow sha.

First only few people(17 boys) were recruited. Just some local boys holding probably matchet and knives.
Secondly the area is too large for there number

Third, 1 major entrance to the area was baracade but there are tons of other exit and entrance to the area can be used by car, foot or train

Lastly rent for a room and a parlour sef is even around 100-170k depending on the test. Security fee is 2k5 per month for each room or apartment. Whooping 30k per year. Imagine those in face me I face you or self contain paying half or more than their rent as security fee. How is this even realistic.

This is a place in a state capital in North Central. Not some borno or zamfara oo

My phone consumed around 1.5 -1.9gig but now it consume 3-4 gig doing fairly the same amount of work.

Please what could be the problem or how can I rectify it? Phone is redmi note 8

I updated my RN8 but I noticed it has become very slow. Please what could be the problem or how can I rectify it?

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Planning to get a 1 hp AC.

Other appliances I run are
32inchs TV
Decoder
2 light bulb

Please if am to get the normal 1 hp AC what capacity of generator should I go for?

What if I get an inverter AC?

valuka:
From childhood, I have been hearing how God is omnipotent and omnipresent. He also knows the future, He knows what we are thinking and what we will do in the next minute. That He know us even before we were conceived.

Now my question is, "Do God know whether I will go to hell or heaven?"

If He already knew that I will go to hell (even before I was conceived), then why did He allow me to come into this world and rot in hell later

If you argue that He gave us the power to choose, then as an everseeing God, He must have known what my choice will be.
Why then did He create me knowing that I will make the choice of hell?

If you argue that He doesn't know, then does it mean that He no longer know the future?

...Thoughts in my head with no answers yet.

Your opinions are welcomed.

Everything in Christianity and all other religions can not stand scrutiny and common sense. Try subjecting their text, belief or doctrines to reason and common sense they'll all fall apart.

Finally you are realising it is now. You are on your way to redemption.

xxxtedyxxx

How do I play my cards well with a girl I want as FWB without making her think am Love or I want a relationship especially at the beginning?

Is it by force?

InTheCloudySky:
My reply was/is based on people in the U.S/abroad, considering you mentioned the "USA" in your post. I'm aware most people abroad who are getting married or want to get married, want kids. There are tons of new married couples on IG who are also adopting these days.

I've never seen any threads on Nairaland from people wanting to get married but don't want kids. Those threads are probably by people in Nigeria, but you can post them here for me to see. Other than that, those abroad who want to marry also want kids


Wikipedia is no credible source.

Search for childfree groups on Facebook, most of them are private thus. Join so that you can see for yourself.

As for nairaland, search using "I want to marry don't want children nairaland" through Google and visit each thread.

InTheCloudySky:
I'm not sure where you got that from. Most people abroad who want to get married do want to have kids. I don't know anymore who wants to get married but don't want kids.

I didn't give a figure or claim that most people abroad don't want to have children. My use of the word staggering was because I never expected that much people have the idea.

I checked online. Article from Wikipedia which I believe are gotten from survey/research. Even on nairaland( you can search)there are threads/people wanting to be childfree yet still with desire to marry.

Check on Facebook their are plenty of childfree groups with thousands of members.

When I checked the percentage of people that don't want to have children in the USA it was staggering yet most of them struggle to find partner( from my observation from comments on Facebook groups)

Now compare this with Nigeria or Africa, what are the odds to find a partner?

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Are you now married, found a partner or in any kind of relationship with someone with this mindset?

In my opinion provided your saving/income can take care of your expenses without any hassle. Or if your income is greater than your expenses.

So their is no benchmark for the amount. Someone earning just 100k annually can be comfortable.

NB: my take is not on what one wish to have or what would make someone life comfortable. Because someone can be earning a trillion naira and still wouldn't be comfortable.

What's your opinion?

Oyiboman69:
I've also seen a man above 38 yrs who is unmarried and still poor....

It is better to be 99 years poor and single than be 38 years with 1 child and poor.

AdeOri99:
I was having a discussion with one of my elder cousin, and when I said it's unlikely for me to get married cause I very much love freedom, she said it's a cause with such seriousness. Haaaaah.

They see marriage and having kids as way of life. It is easier to face life when alone than when married especially with kids.

Tobichuks08:
reason?
Was that stated as a reason?
Reading without comprehension.
It's one of the advantages of marriage not a reason.

You'll brag with it in heaven, hell, Valhalla or the underworld? That you have a son who stood by your grave during your burial?

What value does it add to the deceased against someone without a heir to stand by his/her grave?

Tobichuks08:
You should be very ashamed of yourself, has poverty eaten so deep in you that you have no value for yourself not to talk of others...

The guy was totally off with the part you bold

Marriage is desired by both genders because every human crave for companionship..
Some come early some come late.

Some marry early and some late and this is all about some personal choices and we all should respect it..

The thread is about marrying or having kids without a source of livelihood or income that can't provide/cater for basic needs not even luxury.

If critically analysed the guys that are poor with kids but enjoying thier marriage can be having a better life than the ones who are still single and trying to aquire all those riches.

What do you mean by poor here? How can you be poor with kids which are being subjected to hardship and still enjoy life please

Inability to send you children to a basic decent school?
Eating 2 meals a day or living on less than 1 dollar a day?
Begging landlord not to evict you?
Your children being sent home from school?
Begging, borrowing to supplement your salary?

which at the end of the day they end up being just financially stable.
Not rich and not wealthy..

Another word for being poor

This is how you push some people without sense to marry then at the end of the day they become an element of pity, begging to feed. Why risk having the kids with the hope that tomorrow things might get better? With the stat about poverty rate in Nigeria do you need a seer to tell you it doesn't work?

Op just because you are single and think your better off, bro your not.
The poor dude has a heir who will probably stand on his grave and you don't.
Life is complex let's all strive to enjoy our choices and respect others regardless of thier present condition

Heir to inherit poverty and soko loan dept left behind abi

tensazangetsu20:
Forget what goes on online. A lot of men offline are very desperate for marriage and dating. I think its lack of achievement in all spheres so in order not to be totally useless they be like let me get married at least that's an achievement but in reality thats suicide.

Go to the dating section, 80% of those dropping their contact are men looking for relationship or looking for a lady to marry.

Check all the threads on nairaland asking why singles aren't married or staying single. Almost all the replies are from men citing lack of job or money.

I am not against marriage or whatever age you decide to marry. But having children without a reasonable source of income that would give them a decent life is wickedness and inhuman.

They are complaining yet adding children. Some with only 2 kids and can't even pay rent or school fees in time oo but still adding another kid.

You hear their reasons like,
✓my mates friends are all married
✓ I am getting old
✓ My parents are pressuring me etc

You hear people giving reasons for having children like:

✓Who would take care of you when old
✓Who would preserve my name
✓My mother said she wants grandchildren.
✓Who would be the heir to my possession.

tensazangetsu20:
I don't know if it's just me or the circle I am around but a lot of young Nigerian men are very desperate about being in a relationship or getting married. These are guys in the 24 to 29 age range. Most unemployed or earning very low salaries 30 to 50k.

They believe that marriage will chang their fate and make them really wealthy. It's quite understandable if women are crazy about marriage as they have a biological clock but a man can literally father kids at 90 if he wants to so what's the rush?

Proverbs 18:22 He who finds a good wife finds a good thing and shall obtain favour from the lord.

"Marry the single people from among you and the righteous slaves and slave-girls. If you are poor, Allah (SwT) will make you rich through His favour; and Allah (SwT) is Bountiful, All-Knowing." (Surah 24, Verse 32)

90% of Nigerians are religious. This is one of their motivation.

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BestRicePlug28:
Are u male or female

Male

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After like 30min to 1 hour running my gen would go off. It would start by becoming loud and it is like the speed also increases, this happens like 3-7 before the gen goes off.

When I noticed the second that the gen would go off, I off my TV, the Gen wouldn't go off again. sound would go back to normal within seconds, then I on the TV back. Within 5 or so minutes it would start again most likely this time around would go off even after taking the load down.

And if I turn it off voluntarily it doesn't stop the way it is supposed to. Normally it rolls but comes to a stop gradually. In my case it just stop. And some times it behaves like there is no fuel then after some while it stop.

I took it to a mechanic, he said the sound is normal and gen is okay. That It is the pistil that doesn't allow engine oil to go around it. This has been happening the last 4 times I tried using it.

Can you tell what could be the problem please, maybe the mechanic doesn't know the problem.

Gptech
The gen is "I pass my neighbor" there is enough engine oil mix.

huutmannn:
You'd agree that a lot of men are still single because they feel that they do not earn enough to raise a family.

How much do you think is reasonable for a man to earn before considering marriage?.

You can share your experience or that of a friend to inspire a young man today!�

I do hear/see guys taking the financial responsibility of their girlfriends, while others take care of it themselves.

There is no major difference when you are single compared to when married. Maybe you only added a mouth to feed in the case of if the wife isn't working or contributing financially.

But when you bring children in to the equation the whole narrative changes.

The decision to marry, have children and number of children you wished is greatly influenced by the type of life you want to leave or give your children.

If you don't mind living in a slum, eating 2 or less square meal a day, your children attend all these public schools without sit/desk, not be able to afford 10k emergency medical fees and so on. Sure with a salary or income of 20k you can marry and have 5 kids.

While on the other hand if you want your child(ren) to attend a good school paying like 50k school fees, visit a fairly good hospital which you can afford, eat good food, wear good clothes, leave in a good good rented or personal house in a good neighborhood and so on. Your current income will tell you if you can pull such type of life.

The more luxurious life you want to leave or give your children the more you have to earn. So decided for yourself.

There are people earning 20k, they birth 5 children. Sure they know the kind of life they want to leave and also give their children.

There are people earning 500k with only 2 kids. They wish to have more but they feel their income can't accommodate such the life they want.

There are those with 500k whom are not yet married with the excuse that they don't earn much.

So OP what type of life do you want to leave and also give your children, there you'll have your answer.

Xenry:
You can pretty much argue with a 10 years old kid online and leave feeling superior. Since you don't know their age, you won't know your loss . . .

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Now you get the point. Sometimes it's just not worth the effort. Especially on Nairaland; a faceless forum like this, where kids fake their ages just to fit in. Mehn, I no fit argue with anybody here oo. Make anonymous kids no use me catch cruise and waste my time.

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But it's sometimes not hard to figure them out; by their comments, you shall know them.
A lot of intelligent dudes are here also, and I attentively read their comments in awe.

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But all in all, do not blindly argue online, the person behind that keyboard may be just a lil kid who's on freemode browsing.

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Nairaland is a cool forum, but there are many kids here... They are in your mentions, threads commenting ***, and yet you would come online, reply their mentions and chat with them like they know "what's up" in life, as if they have experienced the raw realities of nature.

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It's all good shaa... But this forum remains toxic for kids, and some would grow up to hate women if they are allowed to roam around on this section of Nairaland's street aimlessly and unguided!

It doesn't matter whether an individual is 18 or 99 years old, what matters is the intellectual capacity, mental reasoning, comprehensive capabilities of an individual and the level of exposure, knowledge about what is being discussed or argued.

Just because someone is young does not mean the individual knows nothing.

Not only on nairaland, generally know whom you want to argue or discuss with. The first few sentences would tell you if a person is intellectually sound or knowledgeable about the topic in hand or if the individual is welling to reason out or is just a troll.

Like you now what you posted tells me a lot about you. You couldn't figure out that age has nothing to do with discussion or arguement this is a red flag for me.

Would I engage in an argument with you now? No. Besides today is Saturday I have some uniform to wash.

adeniyi65:
Over sometimes now.i have been noted by friends and family as someone with sudden weird reasoning.my reasoning isn't weird if am to evaluate myself.its just that am more logical in my tactics to life, subduing religion rules to some extent and finally going against the usual cultural and society norm that aids the retrogression of the black communities.

That was one of the reason that led me into this reasoning: is having a child a must for us? Going by religion insight,it encourages us to multiply in multitudes and our society and culture never give less.their major point of observation is if you die without giving birth,then you are nothing to the world and the linage to your name will perish for eternity.does this really worth standing on?

To me i will prever a name over a birth.Thomas Edison is known today not by his linage of children but by his contribution to the world through his light invention.Chairman Mao, Malcolm X, Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr.karl benz and the rest are remembered in the heart of every historians and the lovers of documentaries through out the globe not giving any dime about their ladder/offspring kids if even exist.there is more to my submission but don't let me do all the talking.logically at your own view.what do you think about the topic.

The last time I checked it is no crime if you don't want to have children.

Their is no law against not wanting a child.

You don't fall and die just because you don't want to have children.

So OP it is not compulsory. If you want children have them and if you don't it is your choice.