₦airaland Forum

Nym....

You said:

" ...a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.".. im sure you have read or head about this quote... Yes there are numerous people doing what you just said but i say it still doesn't make it right. just because the husband is ok with and still love each other( which they should)doesn't make it right for the woman to come into the unit with her fathers name. A wife's identity and future lies with her husband and not the father. a married woman becomes one

My answer:

This applies to those who are followers of the Bible and therefore is not applicable to those who DO NOT FOLLOW the Bible and in fact the above quote is for those who practice Christian tenets. Please give me something else that doesn't involve something you read in a book. Thank you very much.

LMAO@Anyless saying slayers of White people while he is begging White people for refuge!

[quote author=*Kails*][size=18pt]Jamaica: Exotic[/size]

America: Redneckistan. [/quote]LMAO@redneckistan.

USA: Freedom for Women!

Bleep you haters...at least I don't have to bribe no one to get justice.

Those Muslim women are tired of wearing that hot arse shit they want to feel the breeze and wear comfortable clothes like their freely peers.

dasparrow: It is not just Nairalanders. It is Nigerians in real life not just on the world wide web. The average Nigerian is hateful, spiteful, discriminatory, bigoted and always wishing the downfall of her fellow Nigerian. Keep in mind that most Nairalanders are Nigerians so what you see here online is just a reflection of who the average Nigerian truly is. And then we wonder why Nigeria is not progressing in the real sense of the word. How can a country filled with so many wicked and bigoted citizens progress?

That's what I have been saying for years that there are more Nigerians on this site than any other and they want to say that the site doesn't represent Nigeria.

Thank you for speaking the truth.

You need money to get the necessities you need to survive however there are many couples who are poor as dirt and are living a very fruitful marriage.

Money isn't everything nor it buy love.

sexkillz: [color=#000030]Death is better than this o!
[/color]

His dick is still functionable....just a little lift and stick would do.

Thank goodness....I don't have a hoish husband!

Good. Now dumb arse people will learn better.

nyameke: well some Armenians and Persians are naturally endowed.. most endowed girls of countries like the Italians, Portuguese , Spanish have black blood in them anyway.. ..

Btw you made some points in your earlier responses I will address them when I get home. Left home Using my phone right now. Only do short responses with my phone

There is no such thing as black blood and in fact many theories have stated that Whites came from Blacks originally and they were byproduct of albino babies left in the wilderness to die because Blacks in ancient times thought pale babies were demonic or infected.

[quote author=Lord_Reed]What does that mean?[/quote]Exactly what it said...you don't run nothing.

sambos994: I'm back, did I miss anything?

Go away.

nyameke: " most" endowed black women do I just think iMO that darkskin women fits the rod better.

well good cuz one I have a high metabolism and love to eat and now know our kids won't go hungry. . what's your favorite food and recipe..

Kim Kardashian isn't Black and she is more endowed then some of the Black women regardless of skin color.

There is a difference between expressing yourself and opinions and speaking back. Speaking back refers to a child undermining the adult when orders are given. A conversation between a child and adult should be neutral base for example, allowing a child to express how they feel without consequence usually improves the child/parent relationship. Enforcing fear in a child as a baby usually work but as the child becomes their own person...it leads to rebellion.

We have to remember these children will end up our caregiver as we become elders. It is important to know what is on your child mind so that you can correct anything imperfect and guide with correction. Someone said that the West have corrupted how parents and children interacts with each other. I disagree wholeheartedly many Westerners have adopted the "African mentality" regarding to parenting and often time do not allow their children to speak their mind and opinions. Many children then run into the streets because they no longer feel safe in the home and doesn't have a safe person to talk so they resort into gang violence, become runaways, and consorting with unhealthy adults who do not give a rat arse about these children.

There are different methods of raising children and EACH CHILD IS DIFFERENT...there is no such thing as a standard method of raising children...you have to know your child and customize to what is appropriate to them.

nyameke: Slave owners maltreats their slaves and dehumanize out of hate and disdain and not Love..

Btw I don't see why a female should think and compare themselves to a commodity just because of us marking our territory..

Some slave owners treated their slaves better than some husbands have treated their wives. Don't lie. It doesn't matter how you spin it....you know damn well many of you men view your wives as commodity. The moment a man say that she is to be submissive and subservient to me turn into a boss/employee aura.

Just like you said...husband and wife become one...how is the man the head if the wife is one with him? A person can't be the head and equal to those beneath him. It is like trying to chew and swallow at the same time.

The whole purpose of this thread originally was because some people offline had the nerves to debate me saying that culture/expectation has a lot to do with surname upon marriage. They said Africans are the most cultural upholders in the world....then I said if that is so then why are 20 of the Africans I know that DO NOT LIVE IN AMERICA have different surnames and have been married LONGER THAN YOU AND I PUT TOGETHER?


So I wanted to see if people are following the surname thing because of how they were perceived culturally by their families or it is something that they want to do thinking that it will solidify the marriage?

nyameke: well sorry but MEN with those mentality are ignorants and know no better.. You can't refer to your woman or wife as PROPERTY as in something you buy off the street.. human beings are above that. A woman becomes a helper and an extension of the man when they become ONE UNit and is equal to a man.. Any sane and sensible man knows that Looking at your woman as a property means you look at yourself as a property as well. Not smart!!!
Yes it is.. Any woman having an issue indicates that consciously or subconciously they still see themselves as separate from the man. But the reality is that once the two come together they become as ONE.. That's what marriage is about. If it wasn't then what's the reason for both to live under the same roof.. because if it was about just sex and babies then all we had to do was stay at our separate abodes and call each other for boo.Ty calls when the need arises..

I disagree with your response to number 2 because I know several women who have kept their father's surname as an honor to their late fathers and they love and respect their marriage to the core. I even asked the husbands how did they feel and they were like it is just a surname and I respect her decision to keep the father surname and all of the children has HIS SURNAME because both agreed PRIOR to marriage.

I have an African friend who is married to an African woman and they both have different surnames and the children has hyphenated surname of both parents. They have been married for 22 years. Don't look like they are living as two people to me.

nyameke: I know but I wanted to know if she meant it as in servitude mode. Because I don't see anything wrong with us marking our territory and I also don't see why my woman should..

If she meant servitude mode then its a different ball game

Marking your territory is the same as claiming something as property. A woman having your surname doesn't and won't keep another man from dabbling in your "property".

As a woman...I wouldn't want my husband to claim me as property or his territory as if I am an asset or commodity. It is the same as a slave owner saying brand the slaves so people can recognize who they belong to.

[quote author=*Kails*]so you don't think it is means to "mark property" or claim a female into a family?
lets not forget the reason for last names to begin with.[/quote]Hmm.

ifyalways: Would it make any sense to have Mr chima and mrs winter as a couple?
How would strangers identity them as a couple without stress?what name(s) would their children bear ?

Believe it or not...there are couples with two different names and their marriages last longer than many couples with the same surname and the children usually have the father's surname or the mother's hyphenated surname.

You can identify them by their birth name and what they look like.

nyameke: 1. I believe your husband did the right thing.. I mean why should he be part of something he does not support or condone..
2. I don't see why or how changing a females surname to the husbands denotes to keeping the woman in property mode. Why did you make that statement ?
3. A union between a man and his woman makes them ONE unit and the man being the head of the family it is only natural for the woman to take after the man's surname..

The surname should not be the issue But LOVE.. W

Answer to number 2...this is what the MEN SAID...they said it is a way that a woman can be tied to her husband therefore she is HIS PROPERTY.

Answer to number 3....the man is the head of the house has nothing to do with her taking his name naturally if it was natural then women wouldn't have opposition with taking their husband's surname.

[quote author=*Kails*]Well I don't know about all of the homosexuality stuff as I am straight.
But I believe love is love. You don't even have to be married to be happy or to work out much less change your last name.

I respect most cultures but in my opinion and as far as I am concerned, my keeping or changing my name won't determine how we connect as a couple therefore it is irrelevant.[/quote]That's common sense but some people actually had debates offline about the surname thing. I was like children in Somalia dying of lack of rice and folks debating over surnames

Yall need to get a room.

Fat women don suffer ooo

ikekings: 45 minutes ni? More like 2hrs for the person to see the changes instanta...

You know some people have busy schedules and children so 45 minutes is good. I said daily not monthly.

afam4eva: This is good. They should also be taken to strategic places in Igboland.

Are you still trying to get into some anus?

lefulefu: because we guys got da money and da power

Not all fat men have money and power. Stop lying.