Any guy who can't be open to the truth is a punk. Hey we all have a past and as long as she didn't slit some dudes throat who cares. How does anyone expect to stay with someone if they don't truely know them, my advice don't talk your friend out of dumping her. He is a jerk and shouldn't torture the girl. It seems to me that he is just looking for an excuse to dump her. She should move on and find someone better.

get her a therapist and medicate her, LOL Or tell her that she is to clingy and that you need some space. But I would go for the meds and therapist myself runnnnnnn that sounds so crazy.

Thats worse than my situation, do you want to really be married to an A whole, If he treats you like this before the wedding it only gets worse when the stress of life are added into it. Then imagine married with kids and he kicks you out. Anyman that can be that cold to a women doesn't love her. MY advice: tell him its over and don't except any lame excuses. , do your self a favor get your favorite pair of running shoes and run away to the arms of a better more trustworthy man.

Thank you, Don't worry about I appreciate everyones advice and honesty. You guys are great and I will keep you posted on how the talk goes, (having the conversatoin on friday) LOL.

ahhh duded if a person has to lie then they are not in love. She sounds so confused. Take you good love some place else and let her figure out her life. For petes sake you are not her thearpist.

maybe its like that other post, because they are bored. I don't know. I am a romatic at heart if ya found true love really true love then you wouldn't cheat. I think people who cheat don't know what love is, they are way to selfish and are just interested in there own pleasure. So the question then becomes can a slefish person truely love?

yup thats about right, kinda have to side with lord on this one. Nothing wrong with being around a guy trying to be there friend, Just don't get stuck in the dreaded friend zone then its just a flat out waste of time. lol

Got into many arguments with friend over this, I am a firm believe that the man should say it first because if a women does she run the risk of moving to fast and scaring him off, what you guys thinkg?? By the way let me say this: Why do posters post questions like this, nairaland should screen the topics, dumb question poster, ok all the people complaining can move someplace else because I already said it (ROTFL )

chhhillllll out, she loves you and if you get jealous or freak out you gonna push her to the richer people. She loves you and thats what matter, hopefully you have a loyal woman who only see you when other guys are trying to hit on her.

as long as you know who you are, and when you get married you know that you two are gonna change. In your twenties you are still figuring out who you are, but if you have a cool mate, I say do it and then tell the rest of us what the secert to marriage is,

hahah poster is a confused women, get it right come on now. By the way the reason why I said that I know some dude are cool is because there are, there is never one absolute side of things. Just giving the cool guys there props GEEZZZZZZZZZ (I hate when men generalize that all women are a certain way so don't want to do it to the men) LOL

never had much dealing with african culture, getting information is not trying to close yourself off from the truth, I may be a play thing but at lest I felt like I got all my facts straight, nothing worse then confronting someone on the issue and them saying this is part of my culture, which has already happened with an issue of him getting jealous. He said where he comes from men and women are not casual friends, So should I yell and cuss him out or try and understand where he is coming from. Plus dude I am not saying anything about anyones culture being backwards, I am just saying different cultures have different ways of doing things. For example, my best friend is Asian and she is 29 taking care of her grandma and great grandma. In my point of view this should be her dads and his wifes responsibility, However in her culture it is the responsibilty of the first born. Who is right and who is wrong, no one just different view points and there is not a darn thing wrong with that by I agree with you if it is not a cultural issue then I am just a fling or play thing and I gotta get out because I know in my heart that I am worth more than being some dudes mistress, just wish people where more honest in life but hey life goes on

He divorced his ex wife because she was bi polar and cheated. He was raising two kids on his own. Ex wife got medicated. One of his family members got sick and wifey approached him and told him that it wasn't her fault at that she is medicated and they should try to make it work (which I work with special education children she is right in a way it wasn't her fault). He was married to his wife for fifteen years and had been divorced for two and half. He decided for his kids and family sake he owed his family the chance to see if they could make it work. She had contacted him on monday by thursday he made his dicission on what to do. During that time he did talk to me but he didn't try to sleep with me. Thursday he explained the situation and the he wanted to try and make it work for his family. I couldn't be mad at him at all. He was only with me for six months, I told him I understood and wish him nothing but the best for him and his family. The thing which I respected is he could of had us both and no body would have known about it. I have a full life school, work, working out, ect, in the relationsip he was always honest to a fault and he knew how to chill and be laid back. That type of man the only thing you could do is say, I was a better person for knowing you even if it was for a short time. I got sooo close to what I was looking for but hey life goes on,

forget his looks its, confidence , sense of humor , style, these things can make almost any man look attractive

see what I hate is people who say there are in a commited relationship and cheat, if you want to have fun state the terms out on the gate , Hey I like you but don't want anything serious or want to date other people. Cheaters kill me because they are out having fun when you are at home doing only them. If you want fun cool just make sure you girl can have fun too. THen everyone can get something and know where it came from. Dudes we are in the real world its called HIV and other dieases. You are risking her life for what, something that you can get from her. At lest she shyould be aware of the risks up front. I hope you used a condom

got a point it seems very highschool, but if something I learned is not to judge someone coming from a different culture by your cultural views, understanding is needed. THat is why I posted to make sure that this wasn't a cultural issue. Just trying to make sure I make the right next move ya know.

HAHAA this is funny

Dear EX,

Even though I wasnt the one, I have to say you are one of the coolest guys I ever meet. I admire you for your honesty and your dedication to your family. I wish all the best of luck in your future endevors, And you should teach a class to other men out there on how to treat someone. Eventhough we where not ment for each other I feel that you always treated me like a queen in every aspect. The women that gets you is going should count her lucky stars because you are a man in every essence of the word,

MUCH peace and blessings


( my ex was pretty great LOL )

Quit that is wayyyy to much drama out the gate, honeymoon period should be nice and non stressful, Hey I should take my own advice LOL

Hey lord, you got a point and I never thought about it that way. Now that I am looking back I remember a few dudes who didnt make the cut because they where sooo boring I almost scratched my eyes out >>>>LOL

Dude it s a forum, if you don't like the questions don't answer and post something better its for fun and reflection . If you want we can have a political or scientific discussion , l.oh wait it the romance section LOL People take this wayyyyyy to seriously and some of us are new memebers so don't know what the prior topics have been , give us a break its still new and exciting for us.

Let me start off by saying there are many cool decent guys out there, but something that I notice even with my freinds is why when a guy is given a choice between a cool as hell women (one that is drama free, loves you ps3 more than you, is willing to give you understanding and as much sex as you pecker can get up) that MOST not all men will choice the crazy, gold digging, cheating, morally low girl every time and keep going back to them??

nahh never cheated, but probably because I got cheated on once and it broke my heart. I would have just rather the guy told me he didn't want to be with me anymore, So I treat people the way I want to be treated and I owe the person I am with a phone call saying its over no matter how hard.

not all men are annoying some men are chill , the annoying ones are the ones who don't what they want. THis can lead to major problems.