₦airaland Forum

TV01: Please read again, it's there. Here is an additional one where it's "in one' face".

http://www.heritage.org/research/reports/2004/03/marriage-still-the-safest-place-for-women-and-children

TV

Thanks for this reference. This was exactly what I was looking for. The other references you provided were not in correlation with the topic of discuss but this one is. Weldone!

TV01: I don't feel I received responses to my extensive queries. But a lot has been written.

Lets leave it to our judges to decide.

Well done Obinoscopy, I appreciate it's challenging.

TV

Same here. It's an honour being in this contest with you. I certainly learnt a lot. Have a good night rest.

Regards,
Obinoscopy

TV01: http://www.biblebelievers.com/Cameron1.html

http://www.smartmarriages.com/cohabit.html

http://www.frc.org/get.cfm?i=IS04C02

TV

The first reference was about same sex marriage, the second about cohabitation before marriage while the third reference was also about homosexuality. There's no correlation between your supposed source and your previous assertion that made me request for your source. I'll quote your previous assertion here for the benefit of the viewers

TV01: Studies show that of all the relationship arrangements male/female marriages have the lowest levels of abuse

You said of all relationship, male and females marriages have the lowest levels of abuse. So you're inevitably saying that they shouldn't seek divorce due to marital abuse because of the above reference of yours? Have you not heard of marital rape?Domestic violence? Are you saying such is lowest in marriages? Cos your reference was silent on that

TV01: http://www.biblebelievers.com/Cameron1.html

http://www.smartmarriages.com/cohabit.html

http://www.frc.org/get.cfm?i=IS04C02

TV

Okay thanks, I will look them up.

TV01: Did we force him into marriage at gunpoint?

TV

A simple answer such as: "No he should not seek divorce" or "Yes he may seek divorce only in that instance" would have sufficed. Thanks all the same.

Since my contestant has begged to take his leave, I beg to take mine, even though some of my questions and rebuttals were not addressed squarely.

Goodnight everyone.

TV01: No, he/she should not enter into it in the first place.

TV

Ok, but the deed has been done. He's already married. Don't you think we should liberate him?

Mature, caring and committed adults do not abuse their spouses.

Not everyone who ventures into marriage is matured, caring and committed. Even those who had these virtues abinitio before getting married might end up losing some of these virtues. When they do, don't you think it's advisable for the partner to seek divorce?

TV01: One cannot plead ignorance. Marriage is no to be entered into lightly, as it says on the tin. Whoever joins you should make that clear. Mature, caring, committed. Marriage is not for anyone to devalue or to vary.

TV

You've not addressed my question on the matter . Please read my question again and reply.

The fact that all of these happen outside marriage amply proves that these ailments are not caused by marriage, but by individual human frailties and inability to cope with the demands of the marital union

So what should be the solution for the person you referred to in the bolded? Don't you think he/she should dissolve that marriage since he/she can't meet the demands of the marital union?

Studies show that of all the relationship arrangements male/female marriages have the lowest levels of abuse.

Please provide us with source. It is very wrong to make such assertion without providing source.

DrummaBoy: mine is a comment; hope I am not breaking the rules. I will advice that Obinosco shouls pursue other lines of argument in his rebuttal than trying to make the bible say what it didn't say. The holy writ is settled on the fact that marraige is for life. The other points he raised in his presentation are worth pursuing than trying to di-prove the bible. Thank you.

Thank you very much. I'm not disproving the bible. I am simply quoting it. I am also addressing other lines of argument. Regards

TV01: Read that as you will, but it does not imply re-marriage.

TV

The bone of contention is not about remarriage but about the permissibility of the termination of marital commitment

Marriage in truth is about serving the other. If you can't do that or cannot aspire to it, then forego it.

What if the couples were ignorant of the bolded and ventured into marriage, would you agree that they should seek divorce? After all, they should have forgone it in the first place! I sincerely need your response to this.

Children are often bitter when their parents get divorced. It often cause estrangement

I still don't understand the correlation between divorce and estrangement. It's not like the parents have gone into exile. They are still accessible to the child so I wonder why the term estrangement. I've even seen children of married couples who are still estranged

Granted, the child might feel bitter about the marriage dissolution. But they later get to understand their parents decision when they get older

TV01: Where? Please show us.

TV

Matthew 5:32

Read it carefully, it says sexual immorality is enough justification tto terminate a marriage

Divorce being permitted does not mean it's intention is not lifelong.

Again this a false statement. If divorce is permitted, it means every marriage is not lifelong since there's a termination clause. You cannot say you can live forever when you have a terminated clause: death.

Bible? Easily and speedily debunked. Romans 7:2 - For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband.

The bible gave instances where a woman is free of her husband besides death. This confirms the fact that even the bible is aware that not every marriage is lifelong.

You are making baseless assumptions about "prisons & bondage"without accounting for individual willingness to remain married regardless of desires or outcomes.

What would make one want to remain in a bad marriage? It's only bondage that can.

As to your reference to God, marriage as biblically outlined is for life. Marriage as instituted by God can by His grace, endure. Divorce is a fail whatever you believe.

Provide the chapter and verse in the bible where the bolded was implied

Whatever a couples reasons for getting married - and love or proof of love has never been required - a couple should understand and embrace what marriage represents to society. Marriage is not forced upon any couple. So no, it is a fallacy to claim they say them because "they have to"

You don't seem to understand what I meant by "they have to". I was talking about that clause "Till death do us part". They might not have been pressured into marriage but they certainly were made to recite that clause without meaning it. This is because if they had meant it, there will be no divorce.

Child rearing & care do not necessarily end when children are grown up. Children often need advice and assistance even as adults and not just moral guidance or financial support.

Must the parent of this grownup child be married before they can provide them with the needed advice and assistance? Or is it the marriage certificate that will provide the advice and assistance?

Historically, societies that have repudiated marriage – especially as a means of normalising intimate behaviour – have done so at their own peril.

The argument is not about the repudiation of marriage, I personally will never deny the benefits of marriage, the argument is about whether it should be a lifetime commitment. So can you tell me the import of the statement of yours on the debate topic?

Divorce is devastating for children. And it is traumatic for couples – even those without children.

Your statement: "Divorce is devastating for children" is too general and thus a falsehood. Or are you saying that a child will benefit more from a family where his father beats up his mother everyday than if they are separated? Don't you think we should spare the child of those domestic violence? There are certainly instances were the inability to seek divorce should be what is to be termed devastating.

“Marriage is a monogamous lifelong union between one man and one woman, which is open to children”.

Please can you provide me with the source to this definition of yours, I'm more concerned about the use of the word "lifelong". I need to see where it was used.

[The balanced input of both genders is essential for the proper psychological development of a child. The input from either gender will vary through the child’ development, but it is noteworthy, that in the first few years of life, a mothers input is most critical, while a father comes into his own as children become older and develop greater awareness – especially regards gender (B).

Don't you think you shot yourself on the foot with this truthful statement of yours?

The fact that the inputs of both gender is essential at different stages in the life of the child confirms the fact that it's not a must that the couple must live together before the child can get their parental inputs.