Nacoss25:
Good morning everyone. I am a young man newly married to a 22 yr old lady. our marriage is just 2 months old.

Before I met my wife in 2019, she has this male best friend who they have been best friends even before I met her though my wife is a social and jovial person always cheerful, she easily makes friends wherever she finds herself that's her nature and kind of personality.

Right now her friendship with that her male friend is what am becoming uncomfortable with right now because of the so much attention she is lavishing on him. I have complained to her that I am not comfortable with her closeness with the guy but she is seeing it that am trying to cut her off from her friends.

One interesting part of the whole thing is, since we got married the guy has been trying to distance himself from her a bit knowing too well that she is now married but my wife is even the one doing all she could to keep the friendship going the way it has been going. 2 days ago I and my wife were together she called the guy complaining bitterly how he has been distancing himself from her.

My people what do you think I should do to cut down that connection or will the friendship grow week by the day on it's own? My wife is refusing to understand that in marriage there are things u will have to let go.

Like someone said. The best you need to do is turn the guy to ur bestie too! Take him outing regularly and make him and ur wife uncomfortable about your recent closeness with this guy. Make una two dey ball. In fact make una 3 dey ball. You married a little girl bro who hasn’t seen life yet. I married my wife at 22yrs. Man! It wasn’t easy because her mind isn’t that matured yet and I had to apply wisdom. Apply wisdom bro and never shout or quarrel with her!

BadBradley:
a 22 year old isn't old enough for marriage?

You want them to be prostituting and become an old dejected lovlorn-shrew like you?

Old frustrated feminists like you won't allow these young girls breathe except you corrupt them and level the playing field for oold oafs like you whose pussy is as dry as the biblical wilderness.

Many women now see their menopause in their 30s, but a damaged community object like you would even encourage a woman to keep close male friends in their marriage when it is clear the male friend wants only one thing.

Na God go punish bitter old olosho like you.

Are u guys serious? Really? Is there any moderator on this forum at all? How can someone utterly insulted someone for voicing her opinion about something just like that?
U guys need to grow up on this platform cos u can make ur point without insulting anyone pls!

soundmind4ree:
Get yourself a female bestie... Then watch her complain.

That will make me look week

Pregnant your wife and get her busy with children

I mean put her in family way and she'll succumb


Don't start getting people involved because your marriage in very young

What is best on my mind is GET HER PREGNANT NOW..So she can change her attention to the baby.
Get her busy with work or business

She ought to know there are som certain habits or behaviorals u don't exhibit after marriage! As the saying goes "there are things you aren't taught at Havard Business School" your wife should know that! As for the age, i feel she is too young and maybe still naive, hence these behaviorals! Sit her down and talk to her amicably that she is now married and som certain level of intimacy has to stop with dat guy! I believe if it were you who had a female bestie, she would have brought the roof of your house down!

AntiWailer:
Leave her and watch.

When it is open, it won't be easy to change it to anything.

Once she keeps that relationship secret and away from you, then anything can happen in the secret and in the dark.

With time, she will outgrow him once that one faces his life squarely.

Put yourself in the young man's shoe. How was would you feel if someone advises you to "leave her and watch"?

Sometimes you omniscient counsellors should try seeing things from the angle of the 'victim' you're advising.

Who send you go marry 22 years old pikin

Still give her time to adjust, once she conceives the rest will be history.

Just impregnate her quickly, by the time she's preoccupied with parental duty, nobody will tell her to mind her business nd face front
Many half baked, marital responsibilities ignorants and babes are going into marriage these days, and the result?... Breakups and baby mamaism&babaism . Marriage is a big responsibility

soundmind4ree:
Get yourself a female bestie... Then watch her complain.

Best advice so far albeit short.


Reminds me of the saying, "What is good for the goose is good for the gander."

Nacoss25:
Good morning everyone. I am a young man newly married to a 22 yr old lady. our marriage is just 2 months old.

Before I met my wife in 2019, she has this male best friend who they have been best friends even before I met her though my wife is a social and jovial person always cheerful, she easily makes friends wherever she finds herself that's her nature and kind of personality.

Right now her friendship with that her male friend is what am becoming uncomfortable with right now because of the so much attention she is lavishing on him. I have complained to her that I am not comfortable with her closeness with the guy but she is seeing it that am trying to cut her off from her friends.

One interesting part of the whole thing is, since we got married the guy has been trying to distance himself from her a bit knowing too well that she is now married but my wife is even the one doing all she could to keep the friendship going the way it has been going. 2 days ago I and my wife were together she called the guy complaining bitterly how he has been distancing himself from her.

My people what do you think I should do to cut down that connection or will the friendship grow week by the day on it's own? My wife is refusing to understand that in marriage there are things u will have to let go.

Get a female bestie.....

Oh God, Technology is about destroying another marriage...

OP...My own is that why did she not marry the bestie?
And why did you ignore all these signs when both of you were dating?
Sorry ohh your Wifey is still not ready mentally for marriage!

criuze:
Pregnant your wife and get her busy with children

I mean put her in family way and she'll succumb


Don't start getting people involved because your marriage in very young

You think that would help?? My male bestie even came over to live with us when I put to birth and it was one of The best days of our friendship. You do not be rational but apply logic. They both share a bond trust me male (gay) bestie are the best

Why would you go and marry a woman that has a male bestie,tell her she has to choose between you and that man,and report her to all her parent and yours.if you accept all about male bestie,she will be comparing you to him and he will be brainwashing her,oga.see my wife will never keep male friends,hat de Bleep.

BadBradley:
a 22 year old isn't old enough for marriage?

You want them to be prostituting and become an old dejected lovlorn-shrew like you?

Old frustrated feminists like you won't allow these young girls breathe except you corrupt them and level the playing field for oold oafs like you whose pussy is as dry as the biblical wilderness.

Many women now see their menopause in their 30s, but a damaged community object like you would even encourage a woman to keep close male friends in their marriage when it is clear the male friend wants only one thing.

Na God go punish bitter old olosho like you.

You didn't talk like a wise person at all boss. You don't need the insults

I'm very sure the op and his girl are easterners. I'm currently serving in the east, and I find it interesting to see very young beautiful corpers who are already married. My interactions with them tells how much they still want to mingle and gist with guys of their age.

Married women shouldn't have single male best friends

You want to live long?


Don't fall in love!

Do not fall in love!!

Never ever fall in love!!!

Nacoss25:
Good morning everyone. I am a young man newly married to a 22 yr old lady. our marriage is just 2 months old.

Before I met my wife in 2019, she has this male best friend who they have been best friends even before I met her though my wife is a social and jovial person always cheerful, she easily makes friends wherever she finds herself that's her nature and kind of personality.

Right now her friendship with that her male friend is what am becoming uncomfortable with right now because of the so much attention she is lavishing on him. I have complained to her that I am not comfortable with her closeness with the guy but she is seeing it that am trying to cut her off from her friends.

One interesting part of the whole thing is, since we got married the guy has been trying to distance himself from her a bit knowing too well that she is now married but my wife is even the one doing all she could to keep the friendship going the way it has been going. 2 days ago I and my wife were together she called the guy complaining bitterly how he has been distancing himself from her.

My people what do you think I should do to cut down that connection or will the friendship grow week by the day on it's own? My wife is refusing to understand that in marriage there are things u will have to let go.

I no understand! Male bestie for a married woman?maybe u suld get a female besides too ,so she tastes how it feels.

I go give her resounding slap that she will remember till death do us part.

She is mentally deficient. You married a teenager.

Even though you didn't specify your age bracket but I think getting married to a lady at 22 can be likened to" getting married to an underage girl" trust me , a lady at that age is matured physically but not well develop in understanding the course of marriage as an institution let alone life experiences .
You didn't do a well thorough job regarding the "jovial and friendly " personality of your' wife ', I stand here to say that any lady of what any age that is friendly to a male bestie apart from her main guy is an Emotional Cheat which graduates into sexual tension between them ...
The solution to this is either you get to know the
Unknown bestiee in all ramification by imbibing the little secrecy that makes your woman runs to him emotionally through communication by building on this, then educate her more on the pros and cons of marriage as an institution ....

Impregnate her and see the result

Sincerely brother I don't know

Nacoss25:
Good morning everyone. I am a young man newly married to a 22 yr old lady. our marriage is just 2 months old.

Before I met my wife in 2019, she has this male best friend who they have been best friends even before I met her though my wife is a social and jovial person always cheerful, she easily makes friends wherever she finds herself that's her nature and kind of personality.

Right now her friendship with that her male friend is what am becoming uncomfortable with right now because of the so much attention she is lavishing on him. I have complained to her that I am not comfortable with her closeness with the guy but she is seeing it that am trying to cut her off from her friends.

One interesting part of the whole thing is, since we got married the guy has been trying to distance himself from her a bit knowing too well that she is now married but my wife is even the one doing all she could to keep the friendship going the way it has been going. 2 days ago I and my wife were together she called the guy complaining bitterly how he has been distancing himself from her.

My people what do you think I should do to cut down that connection or will the friendship grow week by the day on it's own? My wife is refusing to understand that in marriage there are things u will have to let go.

Your wife is flirting with fire,mixed with rubbish that might consume her. There's nothing like bestie.Someday soon, he'll bed her. A married woman once told me in confidence that she almost cheated on her husband,one, because she felt his attention to her wasn't adequate.Two, because of her closeness with a male bestie.
See, anyone that still keeps a bestie of the opposite sex after marriage has a hidden agenda,and one should begin to doubt their credentials as committed partners.

anochuko01:

You didn't talk like a wise person at all boss. You don't need the insults

I'm very sure the op and his girl are easterners. I'm currently serving in the east, and I find it interesting to see very young beautiful corpers who are already married. My interactions with them tells how much they still want to mingle and gist with guys of their age.

Talk for yourself bro.

You interact with them on a neutral level without any string attached...but can you say that of other guys. You still have your decency but you can't say that of others.


No be everybody get church mind like you o

Nacoss25:
Good morning everyone. I am a young man newly married to a 22 yr old lady. our marriage is just 2 months old.

Before I met my wife in 2019, she has this male best friend who they have been best friends even before I met her though my wife is a social and jovial person always cheerful, she easily makes friends wherever she finds herself that's her nature and kind of personality.

Right now her friendship with that her male friend is what am becoming uncomfortable with right now because of the so much attention she is lavishing on him. I have complained to her that I am not comfortable with her closeness with the guy but she is seeing it that am trying to cut her off from her friends.

One interesting part of the whole thing is, since we got married the guy has been trying to distance himself from her a bit knowing too well that she is now married but my wife is even the one doing all she could to keep the friendship going the way it has been going. 2 days ago I and my wife were together she called the guy complaining bitterly how he has been distancing himself from her.

My people what do you think I should do to cut down that connection or will the friendship grow week by the day on it's own? My wife is refusing to understand that in marriage there are things u will have to let go.

Just find the guy number and give him a coded phone call, on the phone just tell him say for una family, una always dy ready to do anything for any woman wey una marry o, even if na to pai any man wey want dy mess around with her u no mind o.... Then just sit down and watch magic of distance!!

Nacoss25:
Good morning everyone. I am a young man newly married to a 22 yr old lady. our marriage is just 2 months old.

Before I met my wife in 2019, she has this male best friend who they have been best friends even before I met her though my wife is a social and jovial person always cheerful, she easily makes friends wherever she finds herself that's her nature and kind of personality.

Right now her friendship with that her male friend is what am becoming uncomfortable with right now because of the so much attention she is lavishing on him. I have complained to her that I am not comfortable with her closeness with the guy but she is seeing it that am trying to cut her off from her friends.

One interesting part of the whole thing is, since we got married the guy has been trying to distance himself from her a bit knowing too well that she is now married but my wife is even the one doing all she could to keep the friendship going the way it has been going. 2 days ago I and my wife were together she called the guy complaining bitterly how he has been distancing himself from her.

My people what do you think I should do to cut down that connection or will the friendship grow week by the day on it's own? My wife is refusing to understand that in marriage there are things u will have to let go.

Oga na danger be that oooo
Since she's married, you should be her bestie, both male and female.
Tell her to chose either letting the guy go or stand a chance of ruining her marriage by losing the trust you have for her..........how can a married woman be seeking for attention and closeness with another man in the name of bestie, can't she find those things in you??

Lalami3232:
Lol . Oga make I advise you as a fellow man. In this life eeh, na only two things na dey involve in most cases and this same "2 things" law still apply for this ur matter, make I give you the possibilities:

1. Maybe the guy and ur wife na just normal friends wey don share alot in common, though without sex sha. The friendship don too tight sotey ur wife dey find am difficult to leave the guy.
2. The guy na ur wife one time bedmate wey still dey bust ur wife head with he sex and friendship.
So wetin u go na to talk to ur wife maturedly without any shouting or false accusation because u no get proof say dem dey do anything evil. Tell her say u no dey comfortable with the friendship cus preeq and toto matter be like bread and butter for this generation, very easy to eat.
If she still no stop, then u go leave her alone cus if u use force, she go dey dodge dey go meet the guy for back. But my number 1 advise to u be say, OGA DO DNA FOR UR CHILDREN OOOO, E GET WHY.

I don talk am before and I go talk am again "The day my wife go born girl pikin, I go cry like who dem say na Lai Mohammed be he papa".

your #1 point is clueless so long as marriage is concerned.

CheerfulGiver:
So you knew she had a male bestie. And you did nothing to stop the friendship before you married her, now that you've married her what were you expecting? That she'll stop overnight?

She has taken advantage of your nonchalant attitude and there's nothing you can do about it.

That is not his decision to make, if the bestie was that important she would have hold on or marry him moreover its more effective when people make decisions themselves.
Someone like me i won't be bothered, however its normal for OP to be a bit jealous but in as much as you know ur spouse personality to be jovial & friendly, just save ursef some BP moreover the wife is not hiding things and the bestie is doing right keep distance ... what the husband needs is to do things that will make his wife miss her bestie less, do i need to mention give it time

xpressionx:
My girlfriend will never have male bestie.
From Bestie pant go shift.

Wrong mentality... Is it only ur gfriend u are sleeping with? Na pple like u give ex-griend more attention than ur wife... If am ur wife en, I go do u that tin wey u dey do other ladies

AntiWailer:
Leave her and watch.

When it is open, it won't be easy to change it to anything.

Once she keeps that relationship secret and away from you, then anything can happen in the secret and in the dark.

With time, she will outgrow him once that one faces his life squarely.

I love the idea of leaving them and allowing them keep it public. If they didn't do anything all this while before she got married, it's not likely the will now. Trying to force them apart might lead to the friendship becoming a secret affair. Besides, I don't think it's fair to cut your spouse off her longtime friend with whom she's had a lot of experiences. Friends bring out the sparks in us. If she loses such friends, she might go dull and even the OP wouldn't like that. If she's not giving OP enough attention or not doing whatever OP believes she's a supposed to do as a wife, his concerns would be more appreciated.

Regarding your last statement, do you really think she'll outgrow a longtime friend who still lives in the same city as herself? I think things will change when the guys also get a lady of his own. That way, the OP and that lady will join forces wreck the friendship