I Want To Send My Wife Packing - Family (3)

I Want To Send My Wife Packing - Family (3) - Nairaland

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Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Missmossy(f): 11:32am On May 28, 2021

igwebest23:
My brother I know my wife is my responsibility. But d issue now is that she is making money. She has like 250k saving In her account. Her shop rent is just 90k. And she wants me to pay it. D money she is making, is it ordinary paper. The issue is that ladies of this generation is different from our mum. I live in well furnished two bedroom apartment, paid by me. People are passing my wife shop seeing d level of customer going in and out, d think she is contributing to d family. Is better I marry a girl that is not doing anything that will be submissive to me. I noticed d little money she is making is entering her head.

Haha

she isn’t submissive, sorry sir you should have married a village girl. It seems you are igbo I thought you guys always say you know how to take care of your women and spend all the money on them.

Why complaining now?? Well it appears you guys didn’t talk well on finances which is of utmost priority in marriage either your wife works or otherwise. Her role is simply to support you and assist which ordinarily you shouldn’t be the one to tell her to do so.

It appears your foundation wasn’t built firmly hence this issue already wanting to make you end the marriage. You are the man, so act like one and talk to your wife in ways that would make her do what you want even if she doesn’t want to.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Kaymicheal852: 11:34am On May 28, 2021

igwebest23:
My brother I know my wife is my responsibility. But d issue now is that she is making money. She has like 250k saving In her account. Her shop rent is just 90k. And she wants me to pay it. D money she is making, is it ordinary paper. The issue is that ladies of this generation is different from our mum. I live in well furnished two bedroom apartment, paid by me. People are passing my wife shop seeing d level of customer going in and out, d think she is contributing to d family. Is better I marry a girl that is not doing anything that will be submissive to me. I noticed d little money she is making is entering her head.

.

My brother ,REDPILL is just to know woman nature and be able to predict them ,woman are wonderful creatures and I love them so much, and I'll never advice you to dump your wife ,but I think the only thing you can do now is to ghost her completely and starved her of any attention ( don't take her food or sleep with her and don't bother to communicate with her again) just live your life like a bachelor (since you don't have kids yet and don't cheat on her )

If she don't come to you and ask what's happening,try to communicate and get you on her good side ,then you're single bro ,you don't have a wife and it's better to withdraw from having any kids with her

That means she definitely don't know a role of a husband in her life yet and she thinks she is on top of the world now because she is making money and will never respect you

As I have said earlier don't cheat on her , because when she found out you don't change to her because you have been sleeping with another woman ,she will be more devastated and come back begging on her kneels and she won't be able to put any blame on you

And if she doesn't come to you after all that then she don't mind losing you ,

After more than two months of ghosting her without cheating and she doesn't change,my brother ,get few clothes ,leave the house and move somewhere else and never look back

A word is enough for the wise

8 Likes

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Nobody: 11:34am On May 28, 2021

[quote author=ExpertEDITOR post=102137030]He has every rights to refused to open shop for her before marriage. Personally, I have one girl that pressured me into such until I told her off (she is never my responsibilities until marriage).... Unknown to me, aunty is already planning on a breakup and just looking for pension from me. If not for street smartness, I would have fallen mugun cos she painted a very good business.

And op is not asking for proceeds from her business. All he is asking for is for her to pay her own bills and maybe support in the house without waiting on him for everything (wife is to support not being a liability).

Only a mumu man submits to every shananigans from a woman.

You do have a point in not taking sides as we don't know his wife's story.

No one should be a liability in this 21st century. She should support the house
Ur my guy
Correct
She wants to cash out before dumping u. Folks don't know ladies and their manipulative tendencies. They are d real scammers( Yahoo

1 Like

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by seyigiggle: 11:34am On May 28, 2021

too much emotions running here.

shop rent is part of recurrent expenditures on the business.

so, what is the big deal if the wife pays it?

Teach her how to run a successful business.

my wife knows that if i set up a business for her and she can not run it to settle her recurrent expenditures, my support would be withdrawn. for expansion, i can only provide loan.

many men think they are manly if their working spouse does not contribute financially to the family upkeep.
whatever she earns, you two should agree what amount she would contribute every month.
you are only teaching her to take responsibilities within her powers.

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Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Nobody: 11:43am On May 28, 2021

Am sure you saw all the red flags before you tied the knots with her,... just Sit her down and talk into her senses,... I’m sure she will change

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by DryMouth: 11:46am On May 28, 2021

Dear Useless future wife,

If you try sh*t like dis for me, I will break your head.
I dnt have time for petting women. Also, jst knw i didn't marry you for love. I only married you to produce cute babies and the marriage is prone to be broken at any given moment.

DON'T TRY ME AT HOME

21 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by stupidmod3: 11:47am On May 28, 2021

igwebest23:
This is too much for me. I have had enough. I got married to my wife last year October 2020. I did both traditional wedding and white wedding, spend a million plus. I work with ministry of health. My wife have been insisting that I disclose my salary to her from day 1 but I never, I just told her that am earning 100+. Before I met my wife, she already learn Fashion designing. Then while was rushing around, preparing for wedding, she was pestering me to open shop for her. I specifically told her that d money I have now is Solly for wedding and traditional rite, which cost me fortune. Then after much pressure, her people contributed money and paid for d shop(Remember I have paid her bride price then). I have swallowed red pill. How can I open shop for a girl I have not finished marrying. Then when she opened d shop, I equally supporting her with other things like buying protector and chairs. Every day she is going to shop, I drop pocket of 1k. Some times she ask me money to buy tailor materials.which I give. Now within a space of 7 month my wife now have 14 apprentice. She collected like 30k from them. Then all the money she made in her shop, she put all in her account, she doesn't contribute anything at home. Infact decided not to apply for ATM card. Some time, I may go to. ATM to get money and d tell me no network, if I come to my to ask her for ordinary 1k, she will say she doesn't have it. I never asked her to help in our home finances before, and u don't really care about her money. But now found out through her Facebook chat that she sent her male school friends 7k. She hid it from me, she said d guy needed d money to treat her father in d hospital. I was shock. Cos my wife always complained she dies have money. Now she is complaining that I don't support her in her shop. That she can do whatever she wants with her money. This morning, she was raising her voice to the hearing our flat neighbor s, that am a useless husband,I feel insurted. Am embarrased. That I don't support her. She said her shop rent has expired that I should give her d money but she have enough money in her account to pay it. While is asking me. Am d one that pays for house rent, I buy food stuff, I give her transport every day.
I have had enough. I will call her mum to come over and carry her daughter. I can never beat her. The last night I shouted at her she fainted not to talk of beating.

she is selfish simple

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by stupidmod3: 11:48am On May 28, 2021

give a man a shop he will use it to build a home
give a woman a shop she will complain

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by ExpertEDITOR: 11:58am On May 28, 2021

igwebest23:
Ur my guy
Correct
She wants to cash out before dumping u. Folks don't know ladies and their manipulative tendencies. They are d real scammers( Yahoo

My OT that I shouldn't put my money where I don't have a control especially with woman I am not married to, helped me to scale her traps. She painted it so well that even the most stingiest guy would have bought it.

I told her to her face that she is not my responsibility until marriage. The look on her face was so priceless.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Kaymicheal852: 11:59am On May 28, 2021

Norphiee:
Am sure you saw all the red flags before you tied the knots with her,... just Sit her down and talk into her senses,... I’m sure she will change

Personally I think there is no point talking woman into her senses unless she comes to you herself and wats to figure things out, anytime you try to settle things with her woman without her willingness to do so ,you will just be like a mumu in her eyes and I can promise you she will only grow wings

Woman don't have any loyalty , commitment or
boundaries unless you set the boundaries for her yourself or she loves you so much and have make lots of sacrifices for the relationship to work (which is rear) or at least ,the boundaries have been set for her before leaving her father house( she has been traditionally or religiously conserved) and she knows any hiccups in her marriage will bring a shame to her and will be rebucked

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Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Nobody: 12:11pm On May 28, 2021

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Nobody: 12:13pm On May 28, 2021

ExpertEDITOR:
My OT that I shouldn't put my money where I don't have a control especially with woman I am not married to, helped me to scale her traps. She painted it so well that even the most stingiest guy would have bought it.

I told her to her face that she is not my responsibility until marriage. The look on her face was so priceless.

Correct man.
Ladies of this generation marry guys only for financially security. The day u loss ur job as a man, u will then know who u marry.

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Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Kaymicheal852: 12:13pm On May 28, 2021

DryMouth:
Dear Useless future wife,

If you try sh*t like dis for me, I will break your head.
I dnt have time for petting women. Also, jst knw i didn't marry you for love. I only married you to produce cute babies and the marriage is prone to be broken at any given moment.

DON'T TRY ME AT HOME

.

Hahahaha ��

Weird but true

The truth is you must get craze for head ( be a no nonsense man )to be able to live successful with a woman or she will rule you ,but you must show that you love her most of the time too and don't be too cold (if you still want her around though)

I don't like to say it but the truth is,woman are logically and virtually just a baby making machine for men who have given up on marriage

3 Likes

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by AmgMakanaki(m): 12:15pm On May 28, 2021

No need to read again. Your wife is still a child, stingy and greedy...

7 Likes

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by AmgMakanaki(m): 12:22pm On May 28, 2021

I just wish you’re like me huh

I’m not brutal oo.. but your wife for Dey co-ordinate wella

1 Like

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by ExpertEDITOR: 12:25pm On May 28, 2021

Kaymicheal852:
Personally I think there is no point talking woman into her senses unless she comes to you herself and wats to figure things out, anytime you try to settle things with her woman without her willingness to do so ,you will just be like a mumu in her eyes and I can promise you she will only grow wings

Woman don't have any loyalty , commitment or
boundaries unless you set the boundaries for her yourself or she loves you so much and have make lots of sacrifices for the relationship to work (which is rear) or at least ,the boundaries have been set for her before leaving her father house( she has been traditionally or religiously conserved) and she knows any hiccups in her marriage will bring a shame to her and will be rebucked

@bolded. I love it when I see men on same pedestal with me. It shows there are still real men who can handle women effortlessly.

Until she opens communication channel herself, you are just wasting your time and it will give her more edge to misbehave cos she sees you re trying to make things work, which means you really do value her than she does for you.

I look at men whenever they are saying "sit her down and have an heart to heart talk".... I see them as clowns who doesn't understand women at basic level.... And they will later run to the internet to say "what do women want?"... She wants you to be a man and stop being a sissy who instead of correcting her will rather nag about it. She wants a man who will never take bullshit without registering his displeasure strongly. But most men are wimps and this make their women frustrated.

When u hate something, register ur displeasure strongly either in words or actions as the case may be. She will be the one to call for truce and negotiation..... Only through this way, will you have your peace and have what u want from her.

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Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by DryMouth: 12:40pm On May 28, 2021

Kaymicheal852:
.

Hahahaha ��

Weird but true

The truth is you must get craze for head ( be a no nonsense man )to be able to live successful with a woman or she will rule you ,but you must show that you love her most of the time too and don't be too cold (if you still want her around though)

I don't like to say it but the truth is,woman are logically and virtually just a baby making machine for men who have given up on marriage

I knw this frm the onset and thats why am tough on any idiot am dating.

Your last statement is so true.
I only see women as baby making machines.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by sorepco(m): 1:00pm On May 28, 2021

U, truly are really a stupid fool!

A cerified one at that!

CharisEleos:
Lol... I don't know why this story is making me laugh out so loud.
Wait... You shouted at her and she fainted hahahahaaaa.... Are you odeyssey or a lion? Lol..

Well, first and foremost, you need to vomit that red pill you swallowed because that is the number one cause of your problems.

Then, if you have the money, renew the rent for her. You're her husband for crying out loud. Or why would you go and bring a lady out of her parents house and be maltreating her with your redpill baldadash?

Remember that pills have side effects. So this might just be one of them which could have a very bad outcome in your marriage if you don't spill it out now.

Oyen Redpill.

2 Likes

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Nobody: 1:08pm On May 28, 2021

Bros.. E never reach make you send am away. That's women for you. You can call an elderly person to come intercede between you two so you could reach a compromise together.

Meanwhile. I'm a student, I sell and I buy any breed of dogs swiftly at a very reasonable price. I also offer pet care and boarding services. Checkout my siggy for contact information

1 Like 1 Share

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by GerogeI(m): 1:13pm On May 28, 2021

Bros, be truthful.
You started the whole thing, with your "it's my money attitude.

1. Your wife does not know how much you earn? How then will she size up or manage her expectations of you? At least if you do not what to tell her the truth , tell her what you want her to think.

2. You swallowed the red pill? Are you married or just dating her? You think marriage is about red pill. You have been acting quite stingy for a bred winner, not for what you did not give, but for the suspicion that accompanies everything you give.

3. So tell me, your wife, a tailor says she wants to open shop as a priority before getting married. Knowing she needs are career and to earn money. You said no no no, let's spend 1 millions plus on owambe. Effectively she got her people to open the shop. Probably with what you paid as bride price. Now you are going to Facebook and whatsapp snooping trying to control that income that you refused to help establish.

I think you are immature and not ready for marriage. Poor lady is responding to what you are moulding her to be. Money conscious. Money means a lot to you, and she is learning to match your attitude to survive. Do you know how many men that pray for a wife that says give me money to start some work. Most ask for money for hair, dress, or even ask you for a house for her family, but yours asked for something that could feed both of you in hard times, yet you acted like a jerk.

She is not your responsibility till marriage, you said so bluntly and hurtful. "Very legal Bro." But now she responds in like manner telling you she is not the bread winner to spend on the family, "Very Legal too" you now come to nairaland to seek advice on the foundation you laid. I think you are a simpleton masquerading as intelligent.

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Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by RMoneyInTheBank: 1:16pm On May 28, 2021

igwebest23:
This is too much for me. I have had enough. I got married to my wife last year October 2020. I did both traditional wedding and white wedding, spend a million plus. I work with ministry of health. My wife have been insisting that I disclose my salary to her from day 1 but I never, I just told her that am earning 100+. Before I met my wife, she already learn Fashion designing. Then while was rushing around, preparing for wedding, she was pestering me to open shop for her. I specifically told her that d money I have now is Solly for wedding and traditional rite, which cost me fortune. Then after much pressure, her people contributed money and paid for d shop(Remember I have paid her bride price then). I have swallowed red pill. How can I open shop for a girl I have not finished marrying. Then when she opened d shop, I equally supporting her with other things like buying protector and chairs. Every day she is going to shop, I drop pocket of 1k. Some times she ask me money to buy tailor materials.which I give. Now within a space of 7 month my wife now have 14 apprentice. She collected like 30k from them. Then all the money she made in her shop, she put all in her account, she doesn't contribute anything at home. Infact decided not to apply for ATM card. Some time, I may go to. ATM to get money and d tell me no network, if I come to my to ask her for ordinary 1k, she will say she doesn't have it. I never asked her to help in our home finances before, and u don't really care about her money. But now found out through her Facebook chat that she sent her male school friends 7k. She hid it from me, she said d guy needed d money to treat her father in d hospital. I was shock. Cos my wife always complained she dies have money. Now she is complaining that I don't support her in her shop. That she can do whatever she wants with her money. This morning, she was raising her voice to the hearing our flat neighbor s, that am a useless husband,I feel insurted. Am embarrased. That I don't support her. She said her shop rent has expired that I should give her d money but she have enough money in her account to pay it. While is asking me. Am d one that pays for house rent, I buy food stuff, I give her transport every day.
I have had enough. I will call her mum to come over and carry her daughter. I can never beat her. The last night I shouted at her she fainted not to talk of beating.

....

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Nobody: 1:28pm On May 28, 2021*

chatinent:
Dear oga,

You are your own problem.

1. It isn't a must to do a wedding with ₦1m if you aren't worth it. People should learn to avoid pleasing onlookers by feeding 6000 people. The wedding is supposed to be a day of joy for you both, not for people's stomachs.

2. I noticed you have a thingy with gender roles. You are a man. Your wife is still your responsibility. You refused declaring your salary to her but is quite inquisitive on what she earns. How na baba?

Coming to the part of she sending money to a male friend, I understand you are hurt because it's a male attached.

But have you tried to understand her?

Are you always seeing yourself as right?

What's the big deal if you pay the shop rent, then, you guys build your communication thingy well?

The communication flow is broken.

Marriage is not a football match you play for halftime and retire, or you get a small injury and decide to walk out because you feel you are the chief captain.

It's a forever course...and the moment you realize this, the better for you.

I see a good wife you have there trying to stand on her feet without your support!

Treat your wife well so she'll be more opened to you.

When you start keeping secrets, trust don yapa. Some men who don't want to disclose their actual salary still tell their wives sth.

If I have a fiancee I had already paid for her dowry, I wouldn't have minded setting up the shop for her.

Afterall, she is going to be my wife.

You let her family support her when she needed you.

You mah no know say any money you spend for wedding don go? You for small invest for her business na. People wey don chop plenti plenti food that day don shit your money finish.

To think your marriage isn't up to a year is quite disheartening too.

Build your beautiful marriage, bro.

Ignore these frustrated sets tagged as redpillers here trying to project their failed lives to you.

Marriage is a gift from God.

I disagree with all you wrote there sir
I was born into married parents and believe you are too...
Now here are my points
In my family the responsibility was shared by my dad and late mom. My dad paid rent, our fees in school, hospital bills and also provide food.
My mom takes responsibility of our welfare, like buying most home appliances, our school transport fees, day to day home maintenance bills like snacks, bread, toiletries, kerosene, church offertories....
Now who takes the heaviest load? Maybe my dad maybe my mom, maybe equal.

That's how a family is run.. D load is not for the man alone.... It never was!

We are quick to remember that a man is meant to be the provider of the family but always forget women were meant to be of support and assist for the institution to work

Even in the olden days, our Forefathers allocated land for their wives to plant vegetables, maize, cassava etc
While themselves plant yams, rice, and other produce meant for men. Those who were hunters, native doctors, allocated larger parts of their land for their wives to farm

16 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by AuroraB(f): 2:14pm On May 28, 2021

igwebest23:
This is too much for me. I have had enough. I got married to my wife last year October 2020. I did both traditional wedding and white wedding, spend a million plus. I work with ministry of health. My wife have been insisting that I disclose my salary to her from day 1 but I never, I just told her that am earning 100+. Before I met my wife, she already learn Fashion designing. Then while was rushing around, preparing for wedding, she was pestering me to open shop for her. I specifically told her that d money I have now is Solly for wedding and traditional rite, which cost me fortune. Then after much pressure, her people contributed money and paid for d shop(Remember I have paid her bride price then). I have swallowed red pill. How can I open shop for a girl I have not finished marrying. Then when she opened d shop, I equally supporting her with other things like buying protector and chairs. Every day she is going to shop, I drop pocket of 1k. Some times she ask me money to buy tailor materials.which I give. Now within a space of 7 month my wife now have 14 apprentice. She collected like 30k from them. Then all the money she made in her shop, she put all in her account, she doesn't contribute anything at home. Infact decided not to apply for ATM card. Some time, I may go to. ATM to get money and d tell me no network, if I come to my to ask her for ordinary 1k, she will say she doesn't have it. I never asked her to help in our home finances before, and u don't really care about her money. But now found out through her Facebook chat that she sent her male school friends 7k. She hid it from me, she said d guy needed d money to treat her father in d hospital. I was shock. Cos my wife always complained she dies have money. Now she is complaining that I don't support her in her shop. That she can do whatever she wants with her money. This morning, she was raising her voice to the hearing our flat neighbor s, that am a useless husband,I feel insurted. Am embarrased. That I don't support her. She said her shop rent has expired that I should give her d money but she have enough money in her account to pay it. While is asking me. Am d one that pays for house rent, I buy food stuff, I give her transport every day.
I have had enough. I will call her mum to come over and carry her daughter. I can never beat her. The last night I shouted at her she fainted not to talk of beating.

If you don't really care about her money, what's the fuss about huh

What do you want us to do shocked

2 Likes

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Jeon(f): 2:24pm On May 28, 2021

igwebest23:
This is too much for me. I have had enough. I got married to my wife last year October 2020. I did both traditional wedding and white wedding, spend a million plus. I work with ministry of health. My wife have been insisting that I disclose my salary to her from day 1 but I never, I just told her that am earning 100+. Before I met my wife, she already learn Fashion designing. Then while was rushing around, preparing for wedding, she was pestering me to open shop for her. I specifically told her that d money I have now is Solly for wedding and traditional rite, which cost me fortune. Then after much pressure, her people contributed money and paid for d shop(Remember I have paid her bride price then). I have swallowed red pill. How can I open shop for a girl I have not finished marrying. Then when she opened d shop, I equally supporting her with other things like buying protector and chairs. Every day she is going to shop, I drop pocket of 1k. Some times she ask me money to buy tailor materials.which I give. Now within a space of 7 month my wife now have 14 apprentice. She collected like 30k from them. Then all the money she made in her shop, she put all in her account, she doesn't contribute anything at home. Infact decided not to apply for ATM card. Some time, I may go to. ATM to get money and d tell me no network, if I come to my to ask her for ordinary 1k, she will say she doesn't have it. I never asked her to help in our home finances before, and u don't really care about her money. But now found out through her Facebook chat that she sent her male school friends 7k. She hid it from me, she said d guy needed d money to treat her father in d hospital. I was shock. Cos my wife always complained she dies have money. Now she is complaining that I don't support her in her shop. That she can do whatever she wants with her money. This morning, she was raising her voice to the hearing our flat neighbor s, that am a useless husband,I feel insurted. Am embarrased. That I don't support her. She said her shop rent has expired that I should give her d money but she have enough money in her account to pay it. While is asking me. Am d one that pays for house rent, I buy food stuff, I give her transport every day.
I have had enough. I will call her mum to come over and carry her daughter. I can never beat her. The last night I shouted at her she fainted not to talk of beating.

Okay

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Nobody: 2:33pm On May 28, 2021

igwebest23:
This is too much for me. I have had enough. I got married to my wife last year October 2020. I did both traditional wedding and white wedding, spend a million plus. I work with ministry of health. My wife have been insisting that I disclose my salary to her from day 1 but I never, I just told her that am earning 100+. Before I met my wife, she already learn Fashion designing. Then while was rushing around, preparing for wedding, she was pestering me to open shop for her. I specifically told her that d money I have now is Solly for wedding and traditional rite, which cost me fortune. Then after much pressure, her people contributed money and paid for d shop(Remember I have paid her bride price then). I have swallowed red pill. How can I open shop for a girl I have not finished marrying. Then when she opened d shop, I equally supporting her with other things like buying protector and chairs. Every day she is going to shop, I drop pocket of 1k. Some times she ask me money to buy tailor materials.which I give. Now within a space of 7 month my wife now have 14 apprentice. She collected like 30k from them. Then all the money she made in her shop, she put all in her account, she doesn't contribute anything at home. Infact decided not to apply for ATM card. Some time, I may go to. ATM to get money and d tell me no network, if I come to my to ask her for ordinary 1k, she will say she doesn't have it. I never asked her to help in our home finances before, and u don't really care about her money. But now found out through her Facebook chat that she sent her male school friends 7k. She hid it from me, she said d guy needed d money to treat her father in d hospital. I was shock. Cos my wife always complained she dies have money. Now she is complaining that I don't support her in her shop. That she can do whatever she wants with her money. This morning, she was raising her voice to the hearing our flat neighbor s, that am a useless husband,I feel insurted. Am embarrased. That I don't support her. She said her shop rent has expired that I should give her d money but she have enough money in her account to pay it. While is asking me. Am d one that pays for house rent, I buy food stuff, I give her transport every day.
I have had enough. I will call her mum to come over and carry her daughter. I can never beat her. The last night I shouted at her she fainted not to talk of beating.

Who be this Muftau sef, Abeg carry your mumuness comot for here before I Vex change my mind.....

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by budaatum: 2:45pm On May 28, 2021

You saved me from responding with an epistle. Thank you.

If he had wanted his wife to be open with him he would have begun communicating in the way he intended to proceed by being open with her about his earnings from the start since her knowing his earnings does not mean she gets to spend it all.

chatinent:
Dear oga,

You are your own problem.

1. It isn't a must to do a wedding with ₦1m if you aren't worth it. People should learn to avoid pleasing onlookers by feeding 6000 people. The wedding is supposed to be a day of joy for you both, not for people's stomachs.

2. I noticed you have a thingy with gender roles. You are a man. Your wife is still your responsibility. You refused declaring your salary to her but is quite inquisitive on what she earns. How na baba?

Coming to the part of she sending money to a male friend, I understand you are hurt because it's a male attached.

But have you tried to understand her?

Are you always seeing yourself as right?

What's the big deal if you pay the shop rent, then, you guys build your communication thingy well?

The communication flow is broken.

Marriage is not a football match you play for halftime and retire, or you get a small injury and decide to walk out because you feel you are the chief captain.

It's a forever course...and the moment you realize this, the better for you.

I see a good wife you have there trying to stand on her feet without your support!

Treat your wife well so she'll be more opened to you.

When you start keeping secrets, trust don yapa. Some men who don't want to disclose their actual salary still tell their wives sth.

If I have a fiancee I had already paid for her dowry, I wouldn't have minded setting up the shop for her.

Afterall, she is going to be my wife.

You let her family support her when she needed you.

You mah no know say any money you spend for wedding don go? You for small invest for her business na. People wey don chop plenti plenti food that day don shit your money finish.

To think your marriage isn't up to a year is quite disheartening too.

Build your beautiful marriage, bro.

Ignore these frustrated sets tagged as redpillers here trying to project their failed lives to you.

Marriage is a gift from God.

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Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by addictiv(m): 3:05pm On May 28, 2021

I find it strange that people decided to get married, share a house, intimacy, kids, everything else but keep their money separate. When you become one with someone, your money should stay together. If you can't trust ur husband or wife with your money then you shouldn't be married to them in the first place.

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Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by gulfer: 3:11pm On May 28, 2021

@your headline, which carpark; Marina or CMS grin

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by gerizzim: 3:26pm On May 28, 2021

Romanoff:
This Red pill you people are swallowing, I hope you know the side effects?

People spend so much time during courtship or dating doing irrelevant things like having sex and galavanting all over the place, leaving aside important things that should be discussed like Finances, number of children, splitting of bills and chores, child care, faith, goals and ambitions, etc.

Your wife is earning enough to pay her own rent and as a fellow tailor, there is a maths to how much you charge customers which includes materials, operations cost and profit.

If you know you can't handle the financial burden on marriage, you should have discussed splitting bills with her, how much to save for projects etc.

You didn't discuss it, now she feels it's your right to pay rent for her shop while she pockets her profits and still claims you don't support her.

First error is not letting her know your salary. The positives of a woman knowing your salary outweighs the negatives if you shined your eyes and married a prudent woman.

A woman can better plan her life if she knows how much you earn factoring in your yearly rent, monthly feeding allowance, child care, savings and upkeep for both of you. You earn 100k but refused to tell her. She prolly thinks you earn over 500k and she prolly even earns more than you but since you're both not open about your finances, you're playing the blame game.

Una never know wetin marriage be, if not, you'd both be open about your finances. It's not about having joint account or she submitting her profits to you, it's about planning the little you both earn to benefit your family.

Make adjustments sir.

D tin too wonder me ooo.
wat do lovers discuss during dating?
Guy go take babe go uphill and down hill from.one eatry to anoda den move to elegushi to alpha beach after comb all d suya , asun and pepper soup nd nkwobi joints holding hands cackling nd giggling floating in the euphoria of perfect lovers in the making.

Most DNT sit down and do a serious reality Q n A on their expectations , roles each will play nd plans to do as team in d marriage , aspirations and Wt each will do to make money and increase dia income.

even pple wen talk bfor marriage d tin dey shake Dem not to talk of couple wen no do any talking.

Nwokem, pls take a break from the marriage. Go chill somwer ND change strategy on ow to make it work .

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Romanoff(f): 3:29pm On May 28, 2021

gerizzim:
D tin too wonder me ooo.
wat do lovers discuss during dating?
Guy go take babe go uphill and down hill from.one eatry to anoda den move to elegushi to alpha beach after comb all d suya , asun and pepper soup nd nkwobi joints holding hands cackling nd giggling floating in the euphoria of perfect lovers in the making.

Most DNT sit down and do a serious reality Q n A on their expectations , roles each will play nd plans to do as team in d marriage , aspirations and Wt each will do to make money and increase dia income.

even pple wen talk bfor marriage d tin dey shake Dem not to talk of couple wen no do any talking.

Nwokem, pls take a break from the marriage. Go chill somwer ND change strategy on ow to make it work .

Honestly. Most of the marital issues that we see on Nairaland could have been prevented by proper communication during courtship.

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Re: I Want To Send My Wife Packing by Depressed101: 3:32pm On May 28, 2021

igwebest23:
This is too much for me. I have had enough. I got married to my wife last year October 2020. I did both traditional wedding and white wedding, spend a million plus. I work with ministry of health. My wife have been insisting that I disclose my salary to her from day 1 but I never, I just told her that am earning 100+. Before I met my wife, she already learn Fashion designing. Then while was rushing around, preparing for wedding, she was pestering me to open shop for her. I specifically told her that d money I have now is Solly for wedding and traditional rite, which cost me fortune. Then after much pressure, her people contributed money and paid for d shop(Remember I have paid her bride price then). I have swallowed red pill. How can I open shop for a girl I have not finished marrying. Then when she opened d shop, I equally supporting her with other things like buying protector and chairs. Every day she is going to shop, I drop pocket of 1k. Some times she ask me money to buy tailor materials.which I give. Now within a space of 7 month my wife now have 14 apprentice. She collected like 30k from them. Then all the money she made in her shop, she put all in her account, she doesn't contribute anything at home. Infact decided not to apply for ATM card. Some time, I may go to. ATM to get money and d tell me no network, if I come to my to ask her for ordinary 1k, she will say she doesn't have it. I never asked her to help in our home finances before, and u don't really care about her money. But now found out through her Facebook chat that she sent her male school friends 7k. She hid it from me, she said d guy needed d money to treat her father in d hospital. I was shock. Cos my wife always complained she dies have money. Now she is complaining that I don't support her in her shop. That she can do whatever she wants with her money. This morning, she was raising her voice to the hearing our flat neighbor s, that am a useless husband,I feel insurted. Am embarrased. That I don't support her. She said her shop rent has expired that I should give her d money but she have enough money in her account to pay it. While is asking me. Am d one that pays for house rent, I buy food stuff, I give her transport every day.
I have had enough. I will call her mum to come over and carry her daughter. I can never beat her. The last night I shouted at her she fainted not to talk of beating.

person like me will wipe her account, and have her come and tell me if I saw the money in her account, that it's no where to be found. I will reply her I thought you said you don't have money, she explain tire... Nonsensical selfish beings

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