₦airaland Forum

Lamanii22:
Marry who you love and find attractive..... It's not always rosy... Learn to tolerate your spouse... And to the ladies sex is always different after a baby... The dryness no be here oo.... And to the guys there are other ways to be intimate with your wife after a baby other than sex... Above all put God in your marriage...

nextstep:
Stay single. Real advice my people.

I miss being able to get up and travel wherever I wanted at the drop of a hat. I had a very small space that didn't cost much. Slept when I wanted, worked as hard (or not) as I wanted. No responsibilities, no bills, no inlaws, no dependents. I miss the quiet peace.

If somebody had sat me down and told me the true amount of work marriage (and kids) are, I would have stayed single.

People will say: "who will take care of you when you get old". Well, with all the money you should saved from being single - without children - you can spend on a very decent nursing home (they are becoming popular in Lagos I see). Even now, how many people with kids are being taken care of now?

Loverboy3333:
That's where a second wife should come in

Judybash93:
Which god abeg? Obatala?

Strech:
tanks honey , you just made my night.. ever since my wife gave birth to our beautiful baby girl, this is exactly 1 year 3 month, I don join vaseline crew, imagine an active young man like me not having sex for more than a year.. I bin wan send am go him papa house. . But your words really change my mindset.

Panacea278:
Marry who gives you peace of mind.

Xilsbridalhouse:
Pray

My dear, do not marry just anyone all because you are due for marriage, otherwise you’d see anyhow.
Before accepting to marry anyone, please and please involve the Author of marriage and our creator who knows the person you want to be with 100% and while doing this, work on yourself as well and pray to be a better spouse for your partner.

1. Do not fornicate with your partner before going into that marriage o! The accuser is always looking for opened doors to accuse you before God. Thank God we are serving a Merciful God but He is also a Consuming Fire.

2. God is not an author of confusion, so He won’t give you someone you are not compatible with! Watch out for compatibility as this would be necessary for peace to reign in your home.

For instance, I wouldn’t advise an introvert to marry an extrovert if you can’t handle his or her moving around, just stay off!

3. Ladies be submissive and respectful o! Dump all those feminists talks at your father’s house as no man will tolerate your rudeness, being disrespectful and nagging like wetin I no know!
Treat your husband like a King, trust me that is his MuMu Button o! Treat him like a king and he’d be willing to do just about anything for you.

4. Pray! This should be like your top most priority in that marriage. Don’t be on social media all day, go down on your knees for few hours and pray as a couple. Pray together please, as this is the unity the devil is fearful of. When two or more people....you know the rest. Pray together o!

5. Kill pride and be extremely humble. Stories like, he offended me so he has to apologize first should be left in your church bin after the ceremony biko! Don’t keep malice oooo...I repeat, do not and never keep malice! Forget pride, just walk to hubby or wife and start bombarding him or her with kisses and hugs, whether you are at fault or not. Be childish, tell Your spouse to carry you like a baby, pull a childish stunt to get your spouse attention and let peace reign. It is for your own good o! Don’t be forming I can keep malice for 200 years, na bitterness and sadness go finish you.
Also learn to forgive like a child. Don’t say things like, I need time to forgive you...which time biko? Unless of course he is a cheat and a wife beater, then you might forgive but I understand emotionally things can’t go back to normal. But once you pray for the right spouse, God will fight for you.

6. No room for Laziness in marriage darlings! You are Lazy? Dirty? Go work on yourselves now! You can’t enjoy such marriage. Also assist each other, wives are not slaves so men do what you have to do as a loving husband and how a king treats his queen.

7. Ehhhhh!!!! Third party Hian! Don’t try it!!! Erm “ I’ll report you to your Mom, Dad, Sister, Brother, Friend etc ...” eh! Don’t try it o! You only need God to resolve your issues. No single outsider should know what is going on in your marriage o! Quickly settle things before it gets out of hands.

8. Erm “My best friend is coming, My friends are coming “ ughhhh! Which nonsense friends? Better shut your home against friends if you want peace of mind. Not literally in a rude way, but there should be no form of closeness again, you are now married! Men! I understand you like to hang out with your friends but limit this as you are no longer a boy! You are now a man with responsibilities, so spend your time on productive things.

9. Be a good example. Treat each other in a way that you’d be grateful to God for bringing you two together. Communicate often, be each other’s best friend, look at situations from two angles and not just yours, correct each other with love, Study the word of God together and discuss your flaws and how to work on your flaws together. Laugh more and frown little or at all. Be an example of how a Christian home should be.

10. Don’t cheat on your spouse as all I have stated would totally be a waste of time if you do this. You won’t even escape God’s punishment and your life would remain sour unless you repent.
Don’t cheat on your spouse o!

10b. Ahhhh Finance! How could I have skipped this Ladies and Gentlemen, this is one of the major Koko in marriage o! Wives be like “ I can’t spend my money o” mostly after getting sick advice and Lori iro advice from fake friends! Hubby be like, “pay me back that money you borrowed from me” shior! Mtchew!!!!
If you can’t handle having a joint account, not with a cheat o! Those cheats will spend your money on side chicks and side boos, that’s why it’s essential you pray like Elijah before accepting to marry anyone biko! Nothing is more sweet like having a joint account with your spouse with super understanding and same spending lifestyles! You will so enjoy this marriage ehn! Especially if you both are not materialistic and would rather invest than buy overrated Aso ebis!
Ladies, this is majorly for you! Who told you that man is your ATM? You work, he works but your money is for yourself in particular ? What happened to being joined as ONE? Why would you watch your hubby suffer while you have more than enough to support him with even if you don’t want a joint account. I’m begging you please, do not leave financial responsibilities to men only! They are not robots na! Work hard, improve on yourselves, pray to God for creation of wealth opportunities, Be each other’s support pillar, don’t frustrate and fight over money issues. You must understand that you are no longer different individuals but now ONE.
Men if your spouse agreed to submit her salary or profits to you, and you spend such money on useless things like giving one side chick girl that is playing mind tricks on you or you trying to get in her pants....I hope you know God will forget you and no one will help you.
Don’t fight over finance please, and if you need to do things 50-50, do it peacefully and if you as a husband you are capable of shouldering all the responsibilities please do it without feeling like a god.


I have so much to say but I pray the Holy Spirit leads you right and help you to speak when you should, act right and stay mute when you should, also do not forget your in-laws are important! Treat them like your blood even if this is a bit stressful, God will definitely find a way to reward you and there is nothing we ask our Dear Father in Heaven that He won’t do. For instance you could say, “Daddy, I’m stressed could you please make my brother in-law to stop acting irresponsible “ and He will answer you.

God bless you as you invite Jesus into your home.

prettyheart:
Married people please gist us

anigbajumo:
As if virgins were saint, I just deflowered my GF which I wanted to marry only for me to discovered that she had sex with two of her exs' when I traveled. All these virgin stuff na crap, I don't bliv it a bit. Am talking about an issue of just 2weeks, she has been begging and I was told she's presently admitted in hospital coz I told her I can't date get again. If you want to av rest of mind in marriage, marry ur best female friend.

SanctifiedSista:
For carnal men, yes but for the spiritual ones, they are birthing and raising an army that will bring solution to our country and d world at large

Kaybae:
. Are you telling me men are saint, yes we have small percentage that are, but why is it that it's only women people do point accusing fingers at..... I have been married for almost 10years, my husband is not staying where I stay, being faithful, loyal, sincere, respectful, just name it, going through each pregnancy all alone, but despite all this he is still cheating, always on his phone chatting with different girls, he will leave me alone, pretending to be tired and go to his room to sleep but check on him later, u will meet him on the phone. When he wakes up, he will first send good morning massages to all his girlfriends, and always behaving like an innocent. This is the only man I use as pray point whenever I pray, sometimes, I don't even pray for my children and myself........ This is the man that will always tell me, he doesn't understand his health so we should stop having sex, which I agree cos I don't want to hurt him but caught him with condom of recent and lied he just took it out without any intention..... So many...... Don't always blame women alone in marriages, I have never reported him for any one in the last 10years of marriage but I was forced to do so to his parents recently cos I feel betrayed.

abike12:
Ladies, stay single until you find someone that respects you, respects women in general and understand his role as a husband in the Bible (if you're Christian). Don't ever marry a stingy man, there's no love without giving, especially with men.

Kaybae:
. Thanks so much, I really appreciate, I was a guest on nairaland all this while and have even been begging him to allow me join, he said no but I joined last month when I caught him with condom..... It's a long story Sha, happy to be a part of nairaland.

SanctifiedSista:
Glory to GOD .thanks for sharing your good news sir. U said u are a business guru..none of my biz is moving, can u help?

prettyheart:
Married people please gist us

nijaomegacode:
No mata the number of pages of advice you write on marriage, 21st century marriage will not still last.
My simple advice: marry a virgin.

sylve11:
This is disgusting.

pocohantas:
I hope they listen. Ndi online virtuous women. So many women are out there catering for their homes alone and the worst part about this is, a woman can be a provider and caregiver easily, but a man can never fit into your womanly role because he is not biologically equipped to. Any woman that chooses to ignore this advice in a relationship and goes into marriage has shortchanged herself for LIFE.

If at all you want to be Nairaland’s sweetheart, you can claim you don’t like money, you don’t care if he gives you. But once you logout, use that your coconut head. A man that loves you and has it, would give you. You wouldn’t even have to ask!! It doesn’t make you a gold-digger!

Xilsbridalhouse:
Pray

My dear, do not marry just anyone all because you are due for marriage, otherwise you’d see anyhow.
Before accepting to marry anyone, please and please involve the Author of marriage and our creator who knows the person you want to be with 100% and while doing this, work on yourself as well and pray to be a better spouse for your partner.

1. Do not fornicate with your partner before going into that marriage o! The accuser is always looking for opened doors to accuse you before God. Thank God we are serving a Merciful God but He is also a Consuming Fire.

2. God is not an author of confusion, so He won’t give you someone you are not compatible with! Watch out for compatibility as this would be necessary for peace to reign in your home.

For instance, I wouldn’t advise an introvert to marry an extrovert if you can’t handle his or her moving around, just stay off!

3. Ladies be submissive and respectful o! Dump all those feminists talks at your father’s house as no man will tolerate your rudeness, being disrespectful and nagging like wetin I no know!
Treat your husband like a King, trust me that is his MuMu Button o! Treat him like a king and he’d be willing to do just about anything for you.

4. Pray! This should be like your top most priority in that marriage. Don’t be on social media all day, go down on your knees for few hours and pray as a couple. Pray together please, as this is the unity the devil is fearful of. When two or more people....you know the rest. Pray together o!

5. Kill pride and be extremely humble. Stories like, he offended me so he has to apologize first should be left in your church bin after the ceremony biko! Don’t keep malice oooo...I repeat, do not and never keep malice! Forget pride, just walk to hubby or wife and start bombarding him or her with kisses and hugs, whether you are at fault or not. Be childish, tell Your spouse to carry you like a baby, pull a childish stunt to get your spouse attention and let peace reign. It is for your own good o! Don’t be forming I can keep malice for 200 years, na bitterness and sadness go finish you.
Also learn to forgive like a child. Don’t say things like, I need time to forgive you...which time biko? Unless of course he is a cheat and a wife beater, then you might forgive but I understand emotionally things can’t go back to normal. But once you pray for the right spouse, God will fight for you.

6. No room for Laziness in marriage darlings! You are Lazy? Dirty? Go work on yourselves now! You can’t enjoy such marriage. Also assist each other, wives are not slaves so men do what you have to do as a loving husband and how a king treats his queen.

7. Ehhhhh!!!! Third party Hian! Don’t try it!!! Erm “ I’ll report you to your Mom, Dad, Sister, Brother, Friend etc ...” eh! Don’t try it o! You only need God to resolve your issues. No single outsider should know what is going on in your marriage o! Quickly settle things before it gets out of hands.

8. Erm “My best friend is coming, My friends are coming “ ughhhh! Which nonsense friends? Better shut your home against friends if you want peace of mind. Not literally in a rude way, but there should be no form of closeness again, you are now married! Men! I understand you like to hang out with your friends but limit this as you are no longer a boy! You are now a man with responsibilities, so spend your time on productive things.

9. Be a good example. Treat each other in a way that you’d be grateful to God for bringing you two together. Communicate often, be each other’s best friend, look at situations from two angles and not just yours, correct each other with love, Study the word of God together and discuss your flaws and how to work on your flaws together. Laugh more and frown little or at all. Be an example of how a Christian home should be.

10. Don’t cheat on your spouse as all I have stated would totally be a waste of time if you do this. You won’t even escape God’s punishment and your life would remain sour unless you repent.
Don’t cheat on your spouse o!

10b. Ahhhh Finance! How could I have skipped this Ladies and Gentlemen, this is one of the major Koko in marriage o! Wives be like “ I can’t spend my money o” mostly after getting sick advice and Lori iro advice from fake friends! Hubby be like, “pay me back that money you borrowed from me” shior! Mtchew!!!!
If you can’t handle having a joint account, not with a cheat o! Those cheats will spend your money on side chicks and side boos, that’s why it’s essential you pray like Elijah before accepting to marry anyone biko! Nothing is more sweet like having a joint account with your spouse with super understanding and same spending lifestyles! You will so enjoy this marriage ehn! Especially if you both are not materialistic and would rather invest than buy overrated Aso ebis!
Ladies, this is majorly for you! Who told you that man is your ATM? You work, he works but your money is for yourself in particular ? What happened to being joined as ONE? Why would you watch your hubby suffer while you have more than enough to support him with even if you don’t want a joint account. I’m begging you please, do not leave financial responsibilities to men only! They are not robots na! Work hard, improve on yourselves, pray to God for creation of wealth opportunities, Be each other’s support pillar, don’t frustrate and fight over money issues. You must understand that you are no longer different individuals but now ONE.
Men if your spouse agreed to submit her salary or profits to you, and you spend such money on useless things like giving one side chick girl that is playing mind tricks on you or you trying to get in her pants....I hope you know God will forget you and no one will help you.
Don’t fight over finance please, and if you need to do things 50-50, do it peacefully and if you as a husband you are capable of shouldering all the responsibilities please do it without feeling like a god.


I have so much to say but I pray the Holy Spirit leads you right and help you to speak when you should, act right and stay mute when you should, also do not forget your in-laws are important! Treat them like your blood even if this is a bit stressful, God will definitely find a way to reward you and there is nothing we ask our Dear Father in Heaven that He won’t do. For instance you could say, “Daddy, I’m stressed could you please make my brother in-law to stop acting irresponsible “ and He will answer you.

God bless you as you invite Jesus into your home.

Kirkman:
Madam, you need someone close to you to voice out all these pent up worries before it explodes inside of you and gives you mental issues. And one more advice take a few weeks holidays off to any destination of your choice in order to clear you head and decide on the next way or step forward in your marriage. Your mental health and well being is paramount here. God forbid you kpai from acute depression, think of your kids o!

anigbajumo:
As if virgins were saint, I just deflowered my GF which I wanted to marry only for me to discovered that she had sex with two of her exs' when I traveled. All these virgin stuff na crap, I don't bliv it a bit. Am talking about an issue of just 2weeks, she has been begging and I was told she's presently admitted in hospital coz I told her I can't date get again. If you want to av rest of mind in marriage, marry ur best female friend.

naijadrivablog:
I not the author. Buy and read it as I did.

Xilsbridalhouse:
Pray

My dear, do not marry just anyone all because you are due for marriage, otherwise you’d see anyhow.
Before accepting to marry anyone, please and please involve the Author of marriage and our creator who knows the person you want to be with 100% and while doing this, work on yourself as well and pray to be a better spouse for your partner.

1. Do not fornicate with your partner before going into that marriage o! The accuser is always looking for opened doors to accuse you before God. Thank God we are serving a Merciful God but He is also a Consuming Fire.

2. God is not an author of confusion, so He won’t give you someone you are not compatible with! Watch out for compatibility as this would be necessary for peace to reign in your home.

For instance, I wouldn’t advise an introvert to marry an extrovert if you can’t handle his or her moving around, just stay off!

3. Ladies be submissive and respectful o! Dump all those feminists talks at your father’s house as no man will tolerate your rudeness, being disrespectful and nagging like wetin I no know!
Treat your husband like a King, trust me that is his MuMu Button o! Treat him like a king and he’d be willing to do just about anything for you.

4. Pray! This should be like your top most priority in that marriage. Don’t be on social media all day, go down on your knees for few hours and pray as a couple. Pray together please, as this is the unity the devil is fearful of. When two or more people....you know the rest. Pray together o!

5. Kill pride and be extremely humble. Stories like, he offended me so he has to apologize first should be left in your church bin after the ceremony biko! Don’t keep malice oooo...I repeat, do not and never keep malice! Forget pride, just walk to hubby or wife and start bombarding him or her with kisses and hugs, whether you are at fault or not. Be childish, tell Your spouse to carry you like a baby, pull a childish stunt to get your spouse attention and let peace reign. It is for your own good o! Don’t be forming I can keep malice for 200 years, na bitterness and sadness go finish you.
Also learn to forgive like a child. Don’t say things like, I need time to forgive you...which time biko? Unless of course he is a cheat and a wife beater, then you might forgive but I understand emotionally things can’t go back to normal. But once you pray for the right spouse, God will fight for you.

6. No room for Laziness in marriage darlings! You are Lazy? Dirty? Go work on yourselves now! You can’t enjoy such marriage. Also assist each other, wives are not slaves so men do what you have to do as a loving husband and how a king treats his queen.

7. Ehhhhh!!!! Third party Hian! Don’t try it!!! Erm “ I’ll report you to your Mom, Dad, Sister, Brother, Friend etc ...” eh! Don’t try it o! You only need God to resolve your issues. No single outsider should know what is going on in your marriage o! Quickly settle things before it gets out of hands.

8. Erm “My best friend is coming, My friends are coming “ ughhhh! Which nonsense friends? Better shut your home against friends if you want peace of mind. Not literally in a rude way, but there should be no form of closeness again, you are now married! Men! I understand you like to hang out with your friends but limit this as you are no longer a boy! You are now a man with responsibilities, so spend your time on productive things.

9. Be a good example. Treat each other in a way that you’d be grateful to God for bringing you two together. Communicate often, be each other’s best friend, look at situations from two angles and not just yours, correct each other with love, Study the word of God together and discuss your flaws and how to work on your flaws together. Laugh more and frown little or at all. Be an example of how a Christian home should be.

10. Don’t cheat on your spouse as all I have stated would totally be a waste of time if you do this. You won’t even escape God’s punishment and your life would remain sour unless you repent.
Don’t cheat on your spouse o!

10b. Ahhhh Finance! How could I have skipped this Ladies and Gentlemen, this is one of the major Koko in marriage o! Wives be like “ I can’t spend my money o” mostly after getting sick advice and Lori iro advice from fake friends! Hubby be like, “pay me back that money you borrowed from me” shior! Mtchew!!!!
If you can’t handle having a joint account, not with a cheat o! Those cheats will spend your money on side chicks and side boos, that’s why it’s essential you pray like Elijah before accepting to marry anyone biko! Nothing is more sweet like having a joint account with your spouse with super understanding and same spending lifestyles! You will so enjoy this marriage ehn! Especially if you both are not materialistic and would rather invest than buy overrated Aso ebis!
Ladies, this is majorly for you! Who told you that man is your ATM? You work, he works but your money is for yourself in particular ? What happened to being joined as ONE? Why would you watch your hubby suffer while you have more than enough to support him with even if you don’t want a joint account. I’m begging you please, do not leave financial responsibilities to men only! They are not robots na! Work hard, improve on yourselves, pray to God for creation of wealth opportunities, Be each other’s support pillar, don’t frustrate and fight over money issues. You must understand that you are no longer different individuals but now ONE.
Men if your spouse agreed to submit her salary or profits to you, and you spend such money on useless things like giving one side chick girl that is playing mind tricks on you or you trying to get in her pants....I hope you know God will forget you and no one will help you.
Don’t fight over finance please, and if you need to do things 50-50, do it peacefully and if you as a husband you are capable of shouldering all the responsibilities please do it without feeling like a god.


I have so much to say but I pray the Holy Spirit leads you right and help you to speak when you should, act right and stay mute when you should, also do not forget your in-laws are important! Treat them like your blood even if this is a bit stressful, God will definitely find a way to reward you and there is nothing we ask our Dear Father in Heaven that He won’t do. For instance you could say, “Daddy, I’m stressed could you please make my brother in-law to stop acting irresponsible “ and He will answer you.

God bless you as you invite Jesus into your home.

Ninisun:
If your salary is not up to 300k monthly (depending on your location) dont marry a jobless woman,whether she has a vision or not..even if it is a skill she learnt,let her be doing something.
Men,if you want to be happy in marriage, seek God first...avoid looking at outward appearance, she has to be intelligent and smart to avoid olodo kids.Work on your libido and cut off some friends that always discuss rubbish that can influence you.
Ladies, go and get a job...work on your attitude, learn to be prudent and seek God's face bf u say yes!