Darhmmy:
We used to be lovers back in uni , We broke up at some point and lost contact. Earlier this year we reconnected at a party and it was obvious we still had feelings for each other.

We started dating and everything seemed nice at first. He never told me he was married. After months of dating , i started to get suspicious as he wouldn't let me visit his home , instead he was always coming to mine and meeting up at hotels. We had a big fight about it and he finally told me the truth. He kept on pleading and asking that we continue dating. I couldn't even leave if I wanted to, I was in love with him.

I am 2 months pregnant and he has been avoiding me. He calls just once in two days and has told me to do whatever I want with the pregnancy , that he is fine with my decisions. I want to keep him and the baby and I'm scared he may ghost up on me. Last night I found his wife and some of his relatives on Facebook and I want to send them texts about it. I really need advise on this.

OK.

They will not hear!


Mumu, flee from premarital sex!

Kilotat:
Quote me anywhere,
No Man will leave the woman he paid her bride price (mother of his Children) for another one that he just miss fucking or side Chick. When will women know that we men naturally like sex? Do you know we can tell side chick anything just to be seeing her pants on a daily bases?
If you like, tell the wife Everything, you will then know that belle no dey kill marriage again. Married women are wise now!

Quote you anywhere? Churchill no leave Tonto wey him pay bride price dey fvck him mistress wey he come later wife?

Una go dey yarn nonsense online with confidence, tufiakwa

Darhmmy:
We used to be lovers back in uni , We broke up at some point and lost contact. Earlier this year we reconnected at a party and it was obvious we still had feelings for each other.

We started dating and everything seemed nice at first. He never told me he was married. After months of dating , i started to get suspicious as he wouldn't let me visit his home , instead he was always coming to mine and meeting up at hotels. We had a big fight about it and he finally told me the truth. He kept on pleading and asking that we continue dating. I couldn't even leave if I wanted to, I was in love with him.

I am 2 months pregnant and he has been avoiding me. He calls just once in two days and has told me to do whatever I want with the pregnancy , that he is fine with my decisions. I want to keep him and the baby and I'm scared he may ghost up on me. Last night I found his wife and some of his relatives on Facebook and I want to send them texts about it. I really need advise on this.

Shame on you, old fool.

The mad demon in you that you refused to tame has finally brought you disgrace. That is what you get when you are a cheap low life hole.

Live with the shame, disgrace and frustration o jare.

takimsipho:

couldn't even leave if I wanted to, I was in love with him . Abeg na who talk this statement? Why do you make it sound as if she is a zombie and has no idea of what's going on. Do you know how many other single guys that have approached her during her relationship with the married man and she rejected them. Wait have you not seen were girls praise their sugar daddy for the gifts and money he showers on them? Baba babes are not the type of people you want to support blindly oooh. If you watch the Meyers show, they will shout and talk and talk and the DNA test will confirm they are lying. Support a girl at your own peril

I don't understand your reasoning at all.

What does it matter how many other single men approached her while she was in this relationship with this man?

What does it matter to this story how some gals praise or don't praise sugar daddies?

I really don't understand how what you have related here has to do with this story as told?

Righteousness2:
Despite all the Preachings on the Word of GOD that is put out for you to know, you refuse to listen and when you choose not to listen to God, there are Consequences that come with it.

First of all, Do not think of Abortion. That will be Murder and Bloodshed on top Adultery and Fornication. That Child Deserves to live.

Secondly, Don't hope or think of Marrying someone's Husband. You will be a thief , an Adulterer , a Home breaker and a husband snatcher.

You need to let your Sin partner know that you are pregnant and will be keeping the Child. Let Him do the Needful and tell his wife that he has Scored an away goal.

Lastly and Most Important, Repent From the evil you have gotten yourself into and ask God For Mercy. Also be Strong and Courageous to take whatever comes with it as your Cross that you must Carry.

If you walk with GOD in Honesty, True Repentance and Humility, He will Clean you up, make you and Settle you in your own Home.

best advice from our resident annoying pastor

Kobojunkie:
So you background check every gal you chat up?

are you related to the writer in question

Darhmmy:
We used to be lovers back in uni , We broke up at some point and lost contact. Earlier this year we reconnected at a party and it was obvious we still had feelings for each other.

We started dating and everything seemed nice at first. He never told me he was married. After months of dating , i started to get suspicious as he wouldn't let me visit his home , instead he was always coming to mine and meeting up at hotels. We had a big fight about it and he finally told me the truth. He kept on pleading and asking that we continue dating. I couldn't even leave if I wanted to, I was in love with him.

I am 2 months pregnant and he has been avoiding me. He calls just once in two days and has told me to do whatever I want with the pregnancy , that he is fine with my decisions. I want to keep him and the baby and I'm scared he may ghost up on me. Last night I found his wife and some of his relatives on Facebook and I want to send them texts about it. I really need advise on this.

Do not send text. He is a perfect gentleman and focused. He is open to whatever the outcomes. But it appears your options are: being a second wife, or maybe baby mama.

I'm sorry you just have to go with one of the 2 options. Doing anything outside these might just escalate things.

OChimex:


Most of you lots in this country seem mean and heartless. No wonder you always have soulless evil leaders as playbacks.

The purpose OP posted her story was for advice and not condemnation, so if you have none, just avoid the post.

When she posted her story she had no right to morality again, we the public have every right to condemn her wrong doing and then proceed to advice her, but the one she is talki6 about texting his wife is more wrong... To prove what... If I am the man I would just lie...

And please advise to the man; go do DNA test when the child is born. It may be for another person...

Werey OP,

Don't send messages to his relatives. The reason is simple, it will sounds like u want to scatter his home. He may decide to snub u now if u keep the baby but I tell u it's just for a short time. When he's back to his sense he may keep u away from his family for some times. But will be responsible for all ur upkeeps. when u see relationship is still solid with u, get him the second baby. When u are pregnant for the second baby, It's that time u can decide to connect with his relatives. Don't rush, it will sounds like u intend to scatter the existing family. I assure u, he'll marry u as the second wife

Darhmmy:
We used to be lovers back in uni , We broke up at some point and lost contact. Earlier this year we reconnected at a party and it was obvious we still had feelings for each other.

We started dating and everything seemed nice at first. He never told me he was married. After months of dating , i started to get suspicious as he wouldn't let me visit his home , instead he was always coming to mine and meeting up at hotels. We had a big fight about it and he finally told me the truth. He kept on pleading and asking that we continue dating. I couldn't even leave if I wanted to, I was in love with him.

I am 2 months pregnant and he has been avoiding me. He calls just once in two days and has told me to do whatever I want with the pregnancy , that he is fine with my decisions. I want to keep him and the baby and I'm scared he may ghost up on me. Last night I found his wife and some of his relatives on Facebook and I want to send them texts about it. I really need advise on this.

wow such an intresting read so this is what you do send his wife and relatives messages informing them of their husbands infidelity also show proof of this via watsapp chats and all there is no need punishing the man by keeping the baby na you go suffer am so just abort it but make sure you scatter that house and let the wife know she married a cheat. with

Darhmmy:
We used to be lovers back in uni , We broke up at some point and lost contact. Earlier this year we reconnected at a party and it was obvious we still had feelings for each other.

We started dating and everything seemed nice at first. He never told me he was married. After months of dating , i started to get suspicious as he wouldn't let me visit his home , instead he was always coming to mine and meeting up at hotels. We had a big fight about it and he finally told me the truth. He kept on pleading and asking that we continue dating. I couldn't even leave if I wanted to, I was in love with him.

I am 2 months pregnant and he has been avoiding me. He calls just once in two days and has told me to do whatever I want with the pregnancy , that he is fine with my decisions. I want to keep him and the baby and I'm scared he may ghost up on me. Last night I found his wife and some of his relatives on Facebook and I want to send them texts about it. I really need advise on this.

Arizoner:
are you related to the writer in question

If your mind needs me to be in order for you to properly process what is in the Op, sure, go for it.

JovialJune:



Oh so it is solely Op's fault? She is suppose to buy condom for the man to use?

And at bolded, explain me this, are you saying a man cannot say NO to a woman's advances? Are men weak beings that they can't decline to sexual activities? It may be that I do not get you clearly, so let me ask, do you mean that sexual activities start and end with females instead of two consenting adults?

True, both are responsible, but women have more to lose. That gives them more weight of responsibility

A man can just walk away from a pregnant woman but a woman cannot walk away from pregnancy

Darhmmy:
We used to be lovers back in uni , We broke up at some point and lost contact. Earlier this year we reconnected at a party and it was obvious we still had feelings for each other.

We started dating and everything seemed nice at first. He never told me he was married. After months of dating , i started to get suspicious as he wouldn't let me visit his home , instead he was always coming to mine and meeting up at hotels. We had a big fight about it and he finally told me the truth. He kept on pleading and asking that we continue dating. I couldn't even leave if I wanted to, I was in love with him.

I am 2 months pregnant and he has been avoiding me. He calls just once in two days and has told me to do whatever I want with the pregnancy , that he is fine with my decisions. I want to keep him and the baby and I'm scared he may ghost up on me. Last night I found his wife and some of his relatives on Facebook and I want to send them texts about it. I really need advise on this.

we will advise you on some conditions, you tell us how long he lasted in bed during the nacking hours, how often you were shouting harder, how he felt when digging ur endless hole

FutureIsFemale:
If you have a future ahead of you, abort the baby else you'd watch your life crumbles.

Men are not to be trusted.

After aborting, blackmail him. Hope he is rich.

You thought process is that of a poverty stricken leech. Sad

Deputy Devil!

Why do you want to send the wife and relatives a message? For what purpose exactly? For them to acknowledge you as second wife?

You are a complete ashawo

WoundedLamb:


I don't know what Boma is. But I believe his wife has every right to know the truth.

To achieve what purpose?

Enyimbamercedes:
Deputy Devil!

Why do you want to send the wife and relatives a message? For what purpose exactly? For them to acknowledge you as second wife?

That is what I want to know

Arizoner:
you seem so bitter and harsh

Since you have already concluded, who am i to say no Thanks for the compliment....Idiot.

Good for you.

Send the family text? Wanna break his home after freely open your legs for him. Typical Eve daughter. Carry your cross. Do you know what Yoruba call Yeye And Esin?

1. U have done NAKA_NAKI sin1
2. U are thinking of abortion sin2
3. U want to keep him 'another woman's husband sin3.
Seriously

Hanty, u need to talk to de guy. Tell him u are keeping the baby, and that's he's going to assist u financially and with his time also if need be.
The situation has to be be communicated to his family at the right time by the man and not u okay
If de guy support u and God helps u pull
through, it would simply mean u having a child for another man, and then move on with life. U co-owner the child with him for sure but then, u ain't going to live with him and the child.
U would have to find ur own husband
I come in Peace

Darhmmy:
We used to be lovers back in uni , We broke up at some point and lost contact. Earlier this year we reconnected at a party and it was obvious we still had feelings for each other.

We started dating and everything seemed nice at first. He never told me he was married. After months of dating , i started to get suspicious as he wouldn't let me visit his home , instead he was always coming to mine and meeting up at hotels. We had a big fight about it and he finally told me the truth. He kept on pleading and asking that we continue dating. I couldn't even leave if I wanted to, I was in love with him.

I am 2 months pregnant and he has been avoiding me. He calls just once in two days and has told me to do whatever I want with the pregnancy , that he is fine with my decisions. I want to keep him and the baby and I'm scared he may ghost up on me. Last night I found his wife and some of his relatives on Facebook and I want to send them texts about it. I really need advise on this.

Una go dey open leg for anything. Write them on fb ,make the wife roast you alive... OYO na your name.

My 2 cents..
Check back the risks of terminating the pregnancy at 8weeks.. If it won't be complicating, go ahead and abort it. But if it'll put your health at risk, you can go ahead and have the baby with the hopes of giving him out for adoption..

Set emotions aside and invite the man to a bitter reality talk.. Extract commitments from him to take care of the abortion costs or the cost of parturition and delivery, as the case may be, in exchange for keeping things confidential away from his wife and family members. Meanwhile you must ensure to remain calm and composed enough not to involve his wife in this mess. Everyone makes mistakes but it shouldn't define us.
I wish you all the best sweetheart.

takimsipho:
Highest she can get is to use the court to force him to pay child support monthly until the child is an adult. And don't forget that she first saw the red flag that he never invited her to his place and finally when she found out he was married, she still continued, she didn't break it off. Oga white knight go and save her, marry her with her pikin. Girls nowadays don't like to take responsibility for their actions or hate accountability. If you enjoy big gbola and squirting orgasms, know say pregnancy dey

Harder harder harder, make me cum, make me cum. Nasty girl

Prechgold1180:

I nur holly but I nur Dey Bleep married people

And for that you feel like u be better person more than op abi?

Na people like u dey make people commit suicide, person carry her problem come online and you come think to claim holier than her be wetin go help her situation.

Enough! Stop the shaming already. The poor lady may have her own fault but in her defense, she claimed not to know the slowpoke is married.
The mistake is in the past, the poor lady is now looking for a solution. Either you have an advice for her or you shut up.

First my dear, you are faced with two options,

1. Find a good clinic and terminate the pregnancy, don't ever listen to any crazy religious lunatic who tries to convince you otherwise.
2. You keep the pregnancy and choose to take care of the baby yourself. You are going to find it hard to marry as a single mom in Nigeria. It is a very judgements and hypocritical society who will do everything to bring you down and make you feel less human.

Fighting the guy or connecting with the wife will be a total waste of time, an uphill battle you are guaranteed to lose. It wont work in a patriarchal and deeply hypocritical society like Nigeria.

No one on Nairaland will help make the decision.

The ball is in your court .

Darhmmy


Go and remove that belly ASAP

Winters23:


And for that you feel like u be better person more than op abi?

Na people like u dey make people commit suicide, person carry her problem come online and you come think to claim holier than her be wetin go help her situation.

She nur think of suicide when she Dey sleep with person husband

Unah go just Dey talk Rubbish

Adviser nowamagbe abeg advise her make she go break another woman marriage Rubbish

takimsipho:
Because women have more to lose if a sexual relationship doesn't work out. She didn't impregnate herself but she allowed herself to be impregnated. If I keep on inviting guys of questionable character into my house, they come and go at odd hours and do anyhow. If something gets stolen in my house, and I start shouting what do you think my neighbors will say; are you not the one bringing useless boys to your house? You are responsible for the type of people you let into your life. Who now is carrying the pregnancy? Abi na the man?

Well said. It's very obvious but people get emotional about it and deny it. Women have more to lose. They have more weight of the responsibility in preventing pregnancy