Cousin9999:
You'll be fine. You have your wifey (who has a good job), and you can enjoy a bunch of new experiences together.

Go see some castles, take a lake cruise, enjoy the coast, or take a scenic train ride. London has great music. Go out and get your wife's wig sweaty.

If you're concerned about what you'll do, train in some random trade, and do that until you find the position you really want. You also have farming business experience, there's no reason why you couldn't do that in UK.

And remember that you're not that far from home. It's fast and inexpensive to visit. You (and your kids) can be there every summer and major holiday.

[img]https://c./kVNnIGMUHm0AAAAC/lebron-james-hug.gif[/img]

So because it's fast and inexpensive to visit he should leave only his wife there so that another guy will start fuçking her abi?

Ficient:
I'm a federal civil servant, wife just got a job in the UK as a nurse. This has been our plan, although she initiated the idea which I supported especially bcuz of our kids. As the time is getting closer I'm developing some cold feet, but eventually I'm sure I will move. Don't really know if leaving my civil service job and farming business is a good idea, I don't really have an Abroad game plan yet.

My brother, it seems we are both on the same boat. Firstly, you need to ask yourself an honest question, what is the objective of asking your wife to go through this process? secondly, you know your wife more than anyone else, so the opinion that your marriage will crash because your wife will take care of the house pending the time you will find your foot may not be applicable to you.
Please, get contact of people who are already in UK, let them talk to you, it will help you in your decision making. There is no doubt, it is not going to be easy but in the long run, it will end in praise.

Don't be deceived brother, don't go when you don't have peace.. life in abroad. Isn't easy because women there are dangerous and terrible. The woman you know in Naija is not the one you know in abroad.. they used men like slaves and you dare not challenge them if you don't want to lose all you labour for... Think twice if you have lost your peace.. it is a divine warning to you ahead of time .. God be with you as you ponder on this Piece of counsel

Ficient:
I'm a federal civil servant, wife just got a job in the UK as a nurse. This has been our plan, although she initiated the idea which I supported especially bcuz of our kids. As the time is getting closer I'm developing some cold feet, but eventually I'm sure I will move. Don't really know if leaving my civil service job and farming business is a good idea, I don't really have an Abroad game plan yet.

Brother please do not listen to anybody telling you he is in the UK and all of that radarada.
I left banking job and big farming consulting business for the UK. I arrived few days ago and I'm already getting job interviews. UK rewards hard working people. If you are good at what you do you will enjoy uk sir. I have five cousin's in the UK and I shared my dream of coming to the UK with them, they advised I stay back in Nigeria because uk is hard. I asked them if they would want to come back and stay in Nigeria, quarell starts. Two of them called me today, with the same number they refused to give me the last time the visited Nigeria.

Uk is a land of rules and regulations. Keep their rules and you will be fine.

Even if you nor like yourself biko do it for those children ejoor.

I will advise you this,
1. if you were not a good husband to your wife in Nigeria, ensure you get on your own visa within a year in the UK.
To avoid did me I'm doing you.
2. Marriage is partnership and not slavery we practice in Africa know this and know peace.
3. Your wife maybe working 4 days a week long shift, this means you will be required to take care of the children and the house more.
4. Responsibilities are shared in the UK.

If you don't have behave well. you can't be poor and be witch at the same time.

Finally Sir, Please move to the UK to better your life and family.

Listen to the voice of reason. It is not popular, but the wise hear it and are better off. The foolish will think letting your wife be the breadwinner is the in-thing. Look before you leap else, you might end up being an online freelance philosopher.

Jondelng:
Sir, please don't leave without getting a good plan. I am presently in the UK and I am talking from experience.
Your wife can be there and you can visit anytime.

You can take leave and go to find a befitting job, if not stay till you get a befitting job.

Ficient:


Thanks very much everyone. I'm still consulting with friends and family, someone suggested I take a study leave from my job instead of resigning outrightly. My wife is a good woman, otherwise I wouldn't entertain the idea at all.

A good woman in Nigeria can turn something else in the UK. Make sure you know what you are getting yourself into.

Ficient:
I'm a federal civil servant, wife just got a job in the UK as a nurse. This has been our plan, although she initiated the idea which I supported especially bcuz of our kids. As the time is getting closer I'm developing some cold feet, but eventually I'm sure I will move. Don't really know if leaving my civil service job and farming business is a good idea, I don't really have an Abroad game plan yet.

Don't quite your job

Ficient:


Thanks very much everyone. I'm still consulting with friends and family, someone suggested I take a study leave from my job instead of resigning outrightly. My wife is a good woman, otherwise I wouldn't entertain the idea at all.

everybody is good until they are not..we all have that monster in us waiting to be triggered...we should expect it at anytime and prepare for it before hand...

It's a good idea but be certain that your wife won't get tired and disrespectful while you are trying to secure a job. Leave of absence will be your best bet for now. Remember this...you are dealing with a WOMAN, most of them do not think things through properly before they act.

uthlaw:
please, which skills someone can learn before coming to UK!

Barbing or hair stylist

It depends on your age ,your level in civil service ,your strength ( healthwise) .Are you ready to hussle under an unfavourable environment.forget about what people say they do abroad.Some naija folks abroad will not tell you what they do to survive .Some will not tell you they wake up so early to go to do menial jobs under the cold.i think that kind of life may not be good for someone of a particular age( 40 upwards).your qualifications and skills matter .it takes time to integrate into any environment,so I advice you don't resign immediately,go on visit ,then when you are sure of what you can do to survive there.make your move ,forget all those telling U to resign immediately,the environment abroad is harsh ,U may not be able to cope with the weather , lifestyle etc and don't forget you will pay bills monthly.agree with your wife ,I must say most naija women change when they get abroad,unless the one that is really deeply rooted in God

Ficient:
I'm a federal civil servant, wife just got a job in the UK as a nurse. This has been our plan, although she initiated the idea which I supported especially bcuz of our kids. As the time is getting closer I'm developing some cold feet, but eventually I'm sure I will move. Don't really know if leaving my civil service job and farming business is a good idea, I don't really have an Abroad game plan yet.

Jondelng:
Sir, please don't leave without getting a good plan. I am presently in the UK and I am talking from experience.
Your wife can be there and you can visit anytime.

You can take leave and go to find a befitting job, if not stay till you get a befitting job.

This remind me of Adekunle gold song

My neighbour and his wife had a disagreement last weekend, and guess what, she threatened her husband with a divorce. They both live in Nigeria presently but the wife will be relocating to the UK next month for her Master's programme while the husband intends to join her three months after.

According to the husband (who happens to be a long time friend), he said this won't be the first time his wife will be threatening him with divorce and taking full custody of their twin boys. Although he is now scared that their marriage may eventually hit the hard rock as his wife can't be that trusted with western culture, he however accepted that relocation will be in the best interest of his boys.

This is just to buttress your statement below.

NaBanga:
I'm just going to be honest with you, there is a high chance you will end up divorced if you are the lazy type. What we call work in Nigeria is the reason the country is not working. If you go 3 months without bringing in money while your wife, is working, you are going to regret the day you left Nigeria. Women are not made to take care of men.By the time your wife is working, trying to clean house and take care of the children in between, you will become her enemy. She will then realize you are not needed and that her life is much better with only the kids. Work and bring money for bills at all costs. Talk to your friends about childcare that will help your wife. Also, be thinking of a course that you can take that will make money in the UK. I wish you the very best and pray your marriage makes it.

It will end up in premium tears and regret

uthlaw:
please, which skills someone can learn before coming to UK!

washing of dead bodies. It is very very lucrative

Jondelng:
Sir, please don't leave without getting a good plan. I am presently in the UK and I am talking from experience.
Your wife can be there and you can visit anytime.

You can take leave and go to find a befitting job, if not stay till you get a befitting job.

Best advice of the day.

How well are you doing in your civil service work? Eg, imagine working in Nnpc, cbn etc then leaving to go start afeash in the UK.
But if you are a lowly staff and don't see a future in the service, then walka fast.
You may also chose to relocate just to give the kids a bright future.

oladipupo2234:
My neighbour and his wife had a disagreement last weekend, and guess what, she threatened her husband with a divorce. They both live in Nigeria presently but the wife will be relocating to the UK next month for her Master's programme while the husband intends to join her three months after.

According to the husband (who happens to be a long time friend), he said this won't be the first time his wife will be threatening him with divorce and taking full custody of their twin boys. Although he is now scared that their marriage may eventually hit the hard rock as his wife can't be that trusted with western culture, he however accepted that relocation will be in the best interest of his boys.

This is just to buttress your statement below.

Your neighbor does not need a soothsayer to tell him that his marriage will collapse like a pack of cards the moment the wife steps abroad. Someone that has not left and is already threatening him with divorce. What a pity.

iamdapsyj:



It's normal to have that cold feet especially when you want to immigrate to another new environment.

My cousin have the same situation with you. His wife moved to the UK as a nurse and a year later my cousin ( who was s a civil servant as well) and their two kids joined her.

My cousin is doing part time HCA because of the kids and also planning some other stuff ( he just got a car probably for cabbing)....

So don't fret bro....

100% correct.

You are playing with fire ,do not quit the job,speak to a top person to share the salary with and come down once in a while and show your face.its good for your retirement plans.job security,its not green on the other side.Taxes are high,you will pay rent ,you will fuel,you can even visit them ocassionally .

1. Pray and if convinced move
2. Move if you have a submissive wife who has respect for you
3. Move for the sake of your children future please
4. Move with the mind to settle down in UK and forget everything about Nigeria , your farm and every other things for the next 5 years.
5. When you get to UK only move with guys who are successful in your area of specialisation and has same Visa like yours.
6.Seek for information on your area of specialisation 7. Never settle into odd jobs ( you may take odd jobs for a while) for more than 3 to 6 months.

Hmmm.
I'm currently in a similar situation. I work with one of the commercial banks here in Nigeria and my wife of less than a year lives in the UK. We're expecting our first child so we're making plans for me to move over. She's also a nurse there and has been living in the UK for over 12 years.
I hope it all works out as the plan is to move over next year.

Just commit it into God's hands. You cannot run away from your wife and kids. Be smart, read up about life in the UK, network, increase your skillset and keep your eyes out for opportunities. God will see us through. Both decisions come with their risks. Staying back in Naija is a problem. Leaving is risky. Choose wisely.

Ficient:
I'm a federal civil servant, wife just got a job in the UK as a nurse. This has been our plan, although she initiated the idea which I supported especially bcuz of our kids. As the time is getting closer I'm developing some cold feet, but eventually I'm sure I will move. Don't really know if leaving my civil service job and farming business is a good idea, I don't really have an Abroad game plan yet.

before quitting cant you take leave of absence 2years atleast then have a plan my God direct you All right

Ficient:


Thanks very much everyone. I'm still consulting with friends and family, someone suggested I take a study leave from my job instead of resigning outrightly. My wife is a good woman, otherwise I wouldn't entertain the idea at all.

They are all good until they get to the abroad.

Think it well before leaving bro

My brother..... Congratulations to you.... Learn something in line with tech..... U will enjoy ursef abroad........ Don't joke with such opportunity.....

Just leave

ayandee:
A family friend whose wife is also a nurse moved to the UK. There has been no issues. The man takes care of the kids when she is at work. He is looking for a job but there's no pressure whatsoever from his wife. They've both been having each other's back from way back. It's just a phase. If you have married a good woman, you have nothing to fear. Join her, take care of the kids while you search for job opportunities. It may entail doing some short time courses to fit into the job market. Be determined that you will make it in the UK. Have a very positive mindset.

from time memorials ,women have never been known to feed a man ,never ,take it or leave it ,be it you are married to a good woman ,it's a ticking time bomb waiting to explode ,it's too risky ,most marriages are shaking now because of a woman feeding a man for the time been ,am sure you must have heard of the statement your money is our money but my money is my money ,

larryking540:

from time memorials ,women have never been known to feed a man ,never ,take it or leave it ,be it you are married to a good woman ,it's a ticking time bomb waiting to explode ,it's too risky ,most marriages are shaking now because of a woman feeding a man for the time been ,am sure you must have heard of the statement your money is our money but my money is my money ,

i agrée with you. But there are still exceptions. The idea of my money is my money should have no place in a marriage especially a Christian marriage.

joeking2222:

Comment like this dey always make me boil in ANGER!!! You be GOD ni, abi you be SEER? make una dey try happy wit person once in life time na!!!

Well, him no get plans for himself ni over there.

Though it depends on the organization u are working with.
But I think leaving this country won't be a problem considering the fact that ur wife and children have already relocated.
This country's future beems!
If u don't Gerrit, forget abourrit

Ficient:
I'm a federal civil servant, wife just got a job in the UK as a nurse. This has been our plan, although she initiated the idea which I supported especially bcuz of our kids. As the time is getting closer I'm developing some cold feet, but eventually I'm sure I will move. Don't really know if leaving my civil service job and farming business is a good idea, I don't really have an Abroad game plan yet.

If I were you, I would just apply for study leave with pay. Get admission and move to see how it is. If it works out fine. All well and good. If it doesn't work out fine. You come back to your job.

[quote author=Ficient post=108671011]I'm a federal civil servant, wife just got a job in the UK as a nurse. This has been our plan, although she initiated the idea which I supported especially bcuz of our kids. As the time is getting closer I'm developing some cold feet, but eventually I'm sure I will move. Don't really know if leaving my civil service job and farming business is a good idea, I don't really have an Abroad game plan yet. [/quot

You don't need to think it twice
If you can do a care job I bet you money will be knocking on your door
You can work as many hours as you wish
My guy is making 3k pounds a month and the wife is also a nurse
He just got a job in psychiatry where he will be earning 26 pounds per hour
You don't need any skill or training to be a care worker
The agency or hospital will give you the training
There's no unemployment abroad provided you're willing to work
I'm telling you as a first hand information