₦airaland Forum

Hmm some men are so blind....


Your wife has been giving u the red flag since
Meaning she doesn't want to do anything with u any more

And you are still doing the man is good chai!

Oga when u go get sense....





The only way to get her attracted back

Ignore all wat she's doing.

Provide for your son

If possible provide for her as well only for food o

Don't always b at home atleast once in awhile leave home for days.

Play like there is no issue btw u and her

Just gv her the space

Don't have conversation with her

But you can ask about your son


Do this for long like a month and half


Trust me she will come talking to u and still ignore her
She will call up a meeting and you get her fully back

You can call me to gv me the feed back or chat me up on WhatsApp 09094281482

OKOATA:
Bro use your brain, let's say you are feeding a dog, taking care of it, bathing it, but in turn it bites you, what would you do? That your witch wife is having sex with someone else, I can bet 1000%. Forget her guilt tripping telling you you did something in the past, bla bla. Why would you even stay with such a person at your own mental health, you will never be happy, you will live in misery and depression till you probably die of HBP, happened to a man in my neighborhood. Bro learn to train your mind to let go of attachments, you are doing all you can yet she doesn't appreciate. If I were you I will tell her I need some spacea, maybe she should go to her parents for some time and from there you can cut her off. Go out there and flex your life bro. Forget this witch man. Many beautiful, hot women out there but you are dulling and suffering yourself. If I give you a book about women, you would hate your wife instantly but I won't, I want you to learn the easy way or the hard way if you proof stubborn to do the needful.

abeg no give am that book,if you do his kids might suffer indirectly,let him learn the easier way

Israeldan1:
Hmm some men are so blind....


Your wife has been giving u the red flag since
Meaning she doesn't want to do anything with u any more

And you are still doing the man is good chai!

Oga when u go get sense....





The only way to get her attracted back

Ignore all wat she's doing.

Provide for your son

If possible provide for her as well only for food o

Don't always b at home atleast once in awhile leave home for days.

Play like there is no issue btw u and her

Just gv her the space

Don't have conversation with her

But you can ask about your son


Do this for long like a month and half


Trust me she will come talking to u and still ignore her
She will call up a meeting and you get her fully back

You can call me to gv me the feed back or chat me up on WhatsApp 09094281482

Bro in as much as your advice is good I would say no, the nigga has suffered too much and he's the one putting all the effort in the marriage. A man should learn to let go of attachments, he doesn't need the woman for anything. Let the witch go.

Philip94:
I have been married for almost a year but my marriage has been 30% sweet and mostly 70% bitter because I have an unforgiven wife who is ONLY concerned about what I said and did wrong but NEVER concern about what I did right. She gets offended easily, keeps malice and give me silent treatment at home. I've had private conversation with her MORE THAN 10 TIMES on how to find a lasting solution to wherever issues she has with me instead of her constant fault finding and malice. Despite my effort, all seems like a waste coz there is no positive change at all. Lately, MY LEGALLY MARRIED WIFE TOLD ME THAT SHE NO LONGER FEEL CONNECTED AND FEEL LOVE FOR ME ANY MORE. I asked her to tell me one or more reason why she said that but her response was NOTHING. She's practically creating space between us. She does her thing alone and does not carry me along in any thing and she wants same from me. She is doing everything to make the marriage stop while I have been the one sustaining and making the marriage work out. Her parents are not helping matters coz they are not giving me listening ears and have a way of supporting their daughter by twisting whatever I say to suite them. B4 we got married, we had quarrel and misunderstandings as other couples do and said abusive words to ourselves which we settled b4 our wedding day and I assume we have forgiven and forgotten about it. But with the look of things, my wife is tied to the past and will keep remembering what I said and did wrong in the past and she allows the past deed affect our present. Sadly, her unforgiving attitude and never ending resentment is badly affecting our marriage presently. I have tried everything possible within my capacity to rekindle back her love for me & for the sake of our marriage and 3 months baby boy. I suggested that we go out to a cool place just the two of us alone but her response is NO. She even said I can go out and have sex with anyone that she doesn't want SEX for now.
NOTE: I am the one paying all the bills at home coz she's presently jobless. Yet, I am not complaining. She is not stressed up as some may think coz there are helpers at home taking care of her and the baby. Please! What can I do to put a stop to this shit. It's affecting my emotion and psychology.

Before u no Kno say na so girls be.better turn ur heart to Stone and be manipulating her.wenever u wan sex buy shawarma and sorts wen coming from work

OKOATA:
See stupid question, so if there are some things that can't be forgiven, why didn't she walk away off the marriage and yet the witch has no job but still depends on the man. You are no different from the same witch wife, unforgiven women asking same fvked up questions. If you can't forgive your man why be in the same house with him, ladies and their fish brain. GTFOH..

Let me tell you a little story.

When I was single, I was dating a guy who was married, but his family lived abroad and from the beginning, he made me understand he will never leave his wife no matter what. I never asked him to anyway, but because we were so close, he didn't want me to feel exploited. He told me anytime i meet a guy who wants to marry me, that I should let him know and he will shift base.

But mahn! We were so close to the extent that no man can come too close. Any time another guy starts taking interest in me, he will jump in and want to know everything going on. He kind of wanted to vet anyone who would marry me.

The problem here was that, a guy who's interested in marriage must want to courtship. You don't just meet today and get married tomorrow. But I didn't have that space because Biodun was all over the place. Infact, if someone likes me and I told him about it, after asking me a few questions about the guy, he will conclude for me that this one is not a serious person.

So I devised ways to cheat on him.

My job took me around the country, and I met a guy in Abuja and we started dating codedly.

One Christmas, Biodun's family were home for Xmas and so he had divided attention. Because they were around, he could no longer pass the night in my house. Because of the small small space between us, I thought it was a perfect time to invite the Abuja guy to my house.

One night, Abbey had left my house to go be with his family, after bidding him farewell for the night, I called the Abuja guy, who was also in town for an assignment.

He came around 9pm and we drove out for some fun. We came back before long and continued the fun in my house.

One thing led to another, and we bleeped! The guy was bleeping me like his life depended on it. But we were obviously compatible. It was awesome! We bleeped round after round and I never heard Biodun was calling my phone until he got to my door. We agreed to see next day, but lover boy was missing me and lied to his wife that he was attending a church vigil that night in order to be with me. When he tried to open the door with his spare, it was bolted from inside.

By now, he knew I was inside with someone. He knocked I didn't hear. The Gen was on.

So he went downstairs and put off the Gen. It was not long before me and my partner sauntered into the palor because of heat inthe bedroom, naked. I didn't know Abbey was standing at my window outside watching us. We went to the kitchen to drink water and returned to the room to continue and Abbey was outside my window hearing my moaning and the bang bang bang from the Abuja carpenter.

Abbey was heartbroken. He started calling my phone again and I answered this time. He told me he was outside my door and that I should come and open the door.

So I came out to the palor only to see my guy at the window in tears. I denied there's nobody inside with me and asked him to go home to his family, that we'd see the next day. This guy refused and asked me to just open the door which I declined.

Okoata, do you know this guy stood outside my window from 12 midnight to 7am next day? He refused to go and I refused to open the door. Occasionally I will leave him at the window to go talk with the guy in room who already knew there's trouble in paradise.

Long story short, Abbey left but after saying he had broke up with me.

Three days later, I received a bbm from him and it was his picture in the hospital.

I went there to see him. He said my infidelity landed him in the hospital. I pleaded and pleaded for forgiveness. When he left hospital, he continued to visit me like before. But his manhood never got up again for me. I continued pleading but he would not heal for months.

After 4 months of touturing me without forgiveness, I took a definite stand.

I told him he should either divorce his wife to marry me or marry me as a second wife or stop the relationship. He chose non!!

Two months later, I met my husband who lived in phc without his knowledge. Four months down the line we got married. Abbey had to go. But he never forgave me till date.

Do you understand? We are no longer dating, but he still has not forgiven me even after 11yrs. Some people are wired like that.

Richy4:
You don't really know her...She is a woman... She is a definition of "the girl next door" ...

Got mindset of her own ... One of the young ladies in family section with brain... Just double check some of her post, u will understand...

But my brother, When she enter her sisterhood mood, e dey be like say she drink Bitterleave water mixed with Ginger Ale and from Obi-Akpo Local Government of Rivers State

the bold - my kinda woman.

i know how clear that mood whn it comes over them.

Philip94:
I have been married for almost a year but my marriage has been 30% sweet and mostly 70% bitter because I have an unforgiven wife who is ONLY concerned about what I said and did wrong but NEVER concern about what I did right. She gets offended easily, keeps malice and give me silent treatment at home. I've had private conversation with her MORE THAN 10 TIMES on how to find a lasting solution to wherever issues she has with me instead of her constant fault finding and malice. Despite my effort, all seems like a waste coz there is no positive change at all. Lately, MY LEGALLY MARRIED WIFE TOLD ME THAT SHE NO LONGER FEEL CONNECTED AND FEEL LOVE FOR ME ANY MORE. I asked her to tell me one or more reason why she said that but her response was NOTHING. She's practically creating space between us. She does her thing alone and does not carry me along in any thing and she wants same from me. She is doing everything to make the marriage stop while I have been the one sustaining and making the marriage work out. Her parents are not helping matters coz they are not giving me listening ears and have a way of supporting their daughter by twisting whatever I say to suite them. B4 we got married, we had quarrel and misunderstandings as other couples do and said abusive words to ourselves which we settled b4 our wedding day and I assume we have forgiven and forgotten about it. But with the look of things, my wife is tied to the past and will keep remembering what I said and did wrong in the past and she allows the past deed affect our present. Sadly, her unforgiving attitude and never ending resentment is badly affecting our marriage presently. I have tried everything possible within my capacity to rekindle back her love for me & for the sake of our marriage and 3 months baby boy. I suggested that we go out to a cool place just the two of us alone but her response is NO. She even said I can go out and have sex with anyone that she doesn't want SEX for now.
NOTE: I am the one paying all the bills at home coz she's presently jobless. Yet, I am not complaining. She is not stressed up as some may think coz there are helpers at home taking care of her and the baby. Please! What can I do to put a stop to this shit. It's affecting my emotion and psychology.

U forced her to marry u. She don tick marriage register thats y she behaving like that and u saw d red flag but ignored

Philip94:
I work in a private fim and I'm okay in my own little way. I am the one providing the essentials at home coz wifey gat no job 4 now.

So if she got job you won't provide again? She's probably experiencing post natal depression so give her time.

What are u still doing with a woman who has told you that she doesn't love you anymore?


There is nothing left than to let her go. Love can't be forced

OKOATA:
Bro in as much as your advice is good I would say no, the nigga has suffered too much and he's the one putting all the effort in the marriage. A man should learn to let go of attachments, he doesn't need the woman for anything. Let the witch go.

It's his choice if he still needs her let him take my advice

But if he wants to move on let him fget about the woman there are women out there who r looking for your kind of man period!!!

#irestmycase

CharlotteFlair:
Let me tell you a little story.

When I was single, I was dating a guy who was married, but his family lived abroad and from the beginning, he made me understand he will never leave his wife no matter what. I never asked him to anyway, but because we were so close, he didn't want me to feel exploited. He told me anytime i meet a guy who wants to marry me, that I should let him know and he will shift base.

Madam for whatever reason your story doesn't collarate and if it does as far as someone doesn't forgive me I won't even call such a person again, I move the fuvk on, this life is too short to be keeping grudges, if his woman doesn't love the husband again because of something she can't forgive then I will throw her out of the window, no time.

OKOATA:
Madam for whatever reason your story doesn't collarate and if it does as far as someone doesn't forgive me I won't even call such a person again, I move the fuvk on, this world is too short to be keeping grudges, if his woman doesn't love the husband again because of something she can't forgive then I will throw her out of the window, no time.

I'm on your side. Forget my initial post, that was not vintage me. I was just tryna sound like NL people.
My usual reaction was to call the Op a simp, but maybe I'm getting soft

I mean, dafuq?? And he came to cry on social media!
If it's no longer working and your conscience is satisfied you have done your best to save your marriage, please get a divorce. Everyone deserves to be happy.

The Nexus with the Op is that if my boyfriend was single, he would have married me despite how he felt. He loved me that much!!
But you can imagine the hell he'll put me through in the marriage.


BTW, what sort of stupid moniker is yours? Okoata...pepper preek?
You are just a street urchin.

Asunta!

CharlotteFlair:
I'm on your side. Forget my initial post, that was not vintage me. I was just tryna sound like NL people.
My usual reaction was to call the Op a simp, but maybe I'm getting soft

I mean, dafuq?? And he came to cry on social media!
If it's no longer working and your conscience is satisfied you have done your best to save your marriage, please get a divorce. Everyone deserves to be happy.

The Nexus with the Op is that if my boyfriend was single, he would have married me despite how he felt. He loved me that much!!
But you can imagine the hell he'll put me through in the marriage.


BTW, what sort of stupid moniker is yours? Okoata...pepper preek?
You are just a street urchin.

Asunta!

Now I understand your Nexus point now. You are very right but all in all sometimes in life you just have to be smart enough to let go of people who doesn't matter. Yes OKOTA is peppers prick.

Candidlady:
Was the bolded necessary

Pretty sure you would have rubbed this same sentence all over her face...


You are not complaining but yet you stated it in your post


Because of the bolded some won't even give you the advice you seek, they will end up insulting your wife


Good luck finding solution to your problem

Aunty zukwanike, is this the only thing u hv to say?

HarunaWest:
Its necessary to state it. She isn't bringing anything to the the table in anyway. No money, no honey now no sex and you saying is it necessary. The way you young ladies of nowadays thinks gets one worried. If she is tired of the marriage, she should divorce him and walk away not depending on him and shes is giving nothing in return. What nonsese.

U are talking to an aunty not young girl at all. Just that ladies nowadays are nonsense. Imagine somebody under my roof without bringing anything yet I won't hv peace of mind, I go fire u to your papa house, I hate nonsense

Philip94:
I have been married for almost a year but my marriage has been 30% sweet and mostly 70% bitter because I have an unforgiven wife who is ONLY concerned about what I said and did wrong but NEVER concern about what I did right. She gets offended easily, keeps malice and give me silent treatment at home. I've had private conversation with her MORE THAN 10 TIMES on how to find a lasting solution to wherever issues she has with me instead of her constant fault finding and malice. Despite my effort, all seems like a waste coz there is no positive change at all. Lately, MY LEGALLY MARRIED WIFE TOLD ME THAT SHE NO LONGER FEEL CONNECTED AND FEEL LOVE FOR ME ANY MORE. I asked her to tell me one or more reason why she said that but her response was NOTHING. She's practically creating space between us. She does her thing alone and does not carry me along in any thing and she wants same from me. She is doing everything to make the marriage stop while I have been the one sustaining and making the marriage work out. Her parents are not helping matters coz they are not giving me listening ears and have a way of supporting their daughter by twisting whatever I say to suite them. B4 we got married, we had quarrel and misunderstandings as other couples do and said abusive words to ourselves which we settled b4 our wedding day and I assume we have forgiven and forgotten about it. But with the look of things, my wife is tied to the past and will keep remembering what I said and did wrong in the past and she allows the past deed affect our present. Sadly, her unforgiving attitude and never ending resentment is badly affecting our marriage presently. I have tried everything possible within my capacity to rekindle back her love for me & for the sake of our marriage and 3 months baby boy. I suggested that we go out to a cool place just the two of us alone but her response is NO. She even said I can go out and have sex with anyone that she doesn't want SEX for now.
NOTE: I am the one paying all the bills at home coz she's presently jobless. Yet, I am not complaining. She is not stressed up as some may think coz there are helpers at home taking care of her and the baby. Please! What can I do to put a stop to this shit. It's affecting my emotion and psychology.

Honestly, leave her, you have tried, if she wants to go, don't stop her

For the fact that her parents are supporting her makes it worst

Don't chase her out but when she goes, don't bother, she will bring herself back

By then she will now seat down and discuss how to pilot the marriage affairs

We must learn to avoid anything that will affect our emotions
It's a silent killer

CharlotteFlair:
What was the nature of the problem you both had in the past that she continues to hang onto? I ask because, some sins cannot be forgiven. Once trust is broken, it never truly mends.

Another rubbish!

So far, there has been only one reasonable contribution from the female folks

Things like this piss the living hell off me. I will be asking you some questions.
1) Is your wife the one feeding you, clothing and Sheltering you?
2) Is your wife the one who looked for money to pay her bride price and other marriage expenses.
3) Is your wife seeing you as the man of the house, whose decisions can only be appeal ,but they definitely stands if it fail the appeal?
4) Seems you fail to know who you are and you fail to understand not all women you can lord over, pick that you can lord over and forever live a happy life. There is a man out there that can lord over your wife, and all those nonsense she is doing won't even happen in the first place.
5) The earlier you count your loss and move on the Better for you.
Peace

CharlotteFlair:
Let me tell you a little story.

When I was single, I was dating a guy who was married, but his family lived abroad and from the beginning, he made me understand he will never leave his wife no matter what. I never asked him to anyway, but because we were so close, he didn't want me to feel exploited. He told me anytime i meet a guy who wants to marry me, that I should let him know and he will shift base.

But mahn! We were so close to the extent that no man can come too close. Any time another guy starts taking interest in me, he will jump in and want to know everything going on. He kind of wanted to vet anyone who would marry me.

The problem here was that, a guy who's interested in marriage must want to courtship. You don't just meet today and get married tomorrow. But I didn't have that space because Biodun was all over the place. Infact, if someone likes me and I told him about it, after asking me a few questions about the guy, he will conclude for me that this one is not a serious person.

So I devised ways to cheat on him.

My job took me around the country, and I met a guy in Abuja and we started dating codedly.

One Christmas, Biodun's family were home for Xmas and so he had divided attention. Because they were around, he could no longer pass the night in my house. Because of the small small space between us, I thought it was a perfect time to invite the Abuja guy to my house.

One night, Abbey had left my house to go be with his family, after bidding him farewell for the night, I called the Abuja guy, who was also in town for an assignment.

He came around 9pm and we drove out for some fun. We came back before long and continued the fun in my house.

One thing led to another, and we bleeped! The guy was bleeping me like his life depended on it. But we were obviously compatible. It was awesome! We bleeped round after round and I never heard Biodun was calling my phone until he got to my door. We agreed to see next day, but lover boy was missing me and lied to his wife that he was attending a church vigil that night in order to be with me. When he tried to open the door with his spare, it was bolted from inside.

By now, he knew I was inside with someone. He knocked I didn't hear. The Gen was on.

So he went downstairs and put off the Gen. It was not long before me and my partner sauntered into the palor because of heat inthe bedroom, naked. I didn't know Abbey was standing at my window outside watching us. We went to the kitchen to drink water and returned to the room to continue and Abbey was outside my window hearing my moaning and the bang bang bang from the Abuja carpenter.

Abbey was heartbroken. He started calling my phone again and I answered this time. He told me he was outside my door and that I should come and open the door.

So I came out to the palor only to see my guy at the window in tears. I denied there's nobody inside with me and asked him to go home to his family, that we'd see the next day. This guy refused and asked me to just open the door which I declined.

Okoata, do you know this guy stood outside my window from 12 midnight to 7am next day? He refused to go and I refused to open the door. Occasionally I will leave him at the window to go talk with the guy in room who already knew there's trouble in paradise.

Long story short, Abbey left but after saying he had broke up with me.

Three days later, I received a bbm from him and it was his picture in the hospital.

I went there to see him. He said my infidelity landed him in the hospital. I pleaded and pleaded for forgiveness. When he left hospital, he continued to visit me like before. But his manhood never got up again for me. I continued pleading but he would not heal for months.

After 4 months of touturing me without forgiveness, I took a definite stand.

I told him he should either divorce his wife to marry me or marry me as a second wife or stop the relationship. He chose non!!

Two months later, I met my husband who lived in phc without his knowledge. Four months down the line we got married. Abbey had to go. But he never forgave me till date.

Do you understand? We are no longer dating, but he still has not forgiven me even after 11yrs. Some people are wired like that.

.

I'll like to communicate with you, can I have your contact?

ChybuzzDD:
Another rubbish!

So far, there has been only one reasonable contribution from the female folks

Attention seeker! Sadly for you I don't come online frequently. But you shaa have been noticed.

Philip94:
.

I'll like to communicate with you, can I have your contact?

Why Baba? I'm no longer sport o

First things first, are you financially viable?

Continue your life Bro

You are simp.
Real men don't beg for love, take your stand.

Wahala

Please you and your wife should settle

Kindly contact Daddy RIGHTEOUSNESS for counseling.

Sorry brother it's game over for you. Another man is already running through that coochie like Lagos- Badagry Expressway.


Jokesapart, this is the typical case of a "good-guy-got-lucky" syndrome most decent men fall into. I can guarantee she is an alpha widow. The ex-guy who touched her soul is gone and is nowhere to be found, but his memory is still etched deep down within her soul. You were the safe guy she reverted to.

And this is not a case of post-partum depression, this "depression" thing is the new excuse being propagated to keep supporting the foolishness of these mordern women from being accountable and responsible for anything. Women have been given birth to babies since the beginning of time and a destructive woman will eventually exhibit destructive behavior if she's allowed to.

Guys need to be careful of alpha widows, they like to use good men as the fallback plan, You will see the signs and you will think you can handle them, but they will suck your strength and sanity dry last last.

i know this will be hard but you have to divorce her. she said she doesnt love you anymore. it is obvious that she is dating someone. divorce her and enjoy your life. marriage is simple when you marry the right person and it is obvious you got married to the wrong woman

Is you didn't have a child, I would have said divorce, but I still recommend divorce since she isn't yielding.

Philip94:
I have been married for almost a year but my marriage has been 30% sweet and mostly 70% bitter because I have an unforgiven wife who is ONLY concerned about what I said and did wrong but NEVER concern about what I did right.

She gets offended easily, keeps malice and gives me silent treatment at home. I've had private conversation with her MORE THAN 10 TIMES on how to find a lasting solution to wherever issues she has with me instead of her constant fault finding and malice. Despite my effort, all seems like a waste coz there is no positive change at all.

Lately, MY LEGALLY MARRIED WIFE TOLD ME THAT SHE NO LONGER FEEL CONNECTED AND FEEL LOVE FOR ME ANY MORE.

I asked her to tell me one or more reason why she said that but her response was NOTHING. She's practically creating space between us. She does her thing alone and does not carry me along in any thing and she wants same from me.

She is doing everything to make the marriage stop while I have been the one sustaining and making the marriage work out. Her parents are not helping matters coz they are not giving me listening ears and have a way of supporting their daughter by twisting whatever I say to suite them.

B4 we got married, we had quarrel and misunderstandings as other couples do and said abusive words to ourselves which we settled b4 our wedding day and I assume we have forgiven and forgotten about it. But with the look of things, my wife is tied to the past and will keep remembering what I said and did wrong in the past and she allows the past deed affect our present.

Sadly, her unforgiving attitude and never ending resentment is badly affecting our marriage presently. I have tried everything possible within my capacity to rekindle back her love for me & for the sake of our marriage and 3 months baby boy. I suggested that we go out to a cool place just the two of us alone but her response is NO. She even said I can go out and have sex with anyone that she doesn't want SEX for now.

NOTE: I am the one paying all the bills at home coz she's presently jobless. Yet, I am not complaining. She is not stressed up as some may think coz there are helpers at home taking care of her and the baby. Please! What can I do to put a stop to this shit. It's affecting my emotion and psychology.

Foolish man. That marriage is dead, can't you see it? Is it until she steals a large amount from you and conspire with her lover to have you killed before you realize you're meant to let her go? Must you be decaying in the grave before you understand that you're now living with your enemy? Don't be a stupid man and fucking divorce her. Simple.