You try. kudos. May your children lift you 8ft above the ground and leave you to fall yakata in future in Jesus name amen

Muntula

Higgies:

I am 100% sure you're from the East cos no omoluabi will ever do such.
You just invoked a curse on yourself.
We call it egun in Yoruba.

A ya e l’enu!

Moz22:
Actually typing this with a heavy heart and so much disgust for what I've done.. wish I had handled the situation better.

My father is the best man I could ever wish for and if I had another chance to pick a dad again in my next life, I'll pick a richer version of him but my mom?? Sigh!

However growing up with them was so stressful in every way u can think of.. my dad was the meek type, soft spoken and slow to react but my mom would always complain about everything, she fights everything and everyone.. never afraid of any form of confrontation, she would complain about my hairstyle, she would check if I sagged my trousers.. she monitored me extremely and always nagged about it.. I'm this typa guy who is well cultured, I wouldn't say I got that from home training tho cos I do not drink, smoke nor womanize... And I think it's d joy of every parent to have child like me, I basically had no friends visiting me then and even up till now. I've got trust issues that's why I don't keep friends.. my mom made my youthful days hell for me, I didn't really enjoy it.. times I spent with her were miserable as she would shout everyday, quarrel even over phone conversations that you would think the person she's fighting with was right in front of her.. and some times I even pity my dad whenever she starts with him. I developed some sorta hatred for her

Lately I've been spending more time with them cos of our last born just so I could keep an eye on him and we stayed close too.. and the way she treats him makes me wonder if she was the one gave birth to him, if I was away when she was pregnant for him and delivered.. I would have argued that she was his mother. There were times that I had to pass the night there and her voice or rants would be what will wake me up very early in the morning just as it used to be when I used to be there...

I used to think that as people grow old, they become calmer but that isn't the case with my mom, she's more violent... She lost her twin sis last year March and I sincerely hoped that would change atleast but iro nio... Her other sisters aren't even speaking to her at the moment. My dad was a musician.. old age won't allow him continue doing music, coincidentally I picked up that barton.. been doing the same music(live musician) all my life but my mom has always been against it.. she was never happy whenever I carry my dad's guitar to rehearse or whenever I bring a piano home.. it was always war...

Been there since last weekend cos of the poor electricity in my area.. we have had power for about 7 days now.. Had gone for a studio session, only to return in d evening and I was greeted with shouting over a very trivial issue, I was so angry that I responded to every of her verbal insults.. and then she hit me and I reciprocated which I felt so bad about almost immediately.. she dragged me by my clothes shouting that I must kill her again, by that time.. my anger had subdued and all I had on my mind was to leave the house immediately. She threatened to arrest me.. She tore my shirt and I managed to pull away from her.. and left without picking my stuffs. All my life, I have never raised up my hands to hit a woman talkless of my mom.. I don't even beat kids when they do wrong, I hate to see tears..

I know it's a disgraceful thing to do. I've got no excuse for what I've done whatsoever. I even avoid confrontations with my own gender sef cos I know what I'm capable of. I'm always quick to say the word sorry just to avoid prolonged issues. I had been offline since it happened, just came here to drop this and I know how much insults I'm gonna get here anyway but we learn everyday and will surely pick the ones that will make me a better person.. no one's perfect

Pls ignore my typo errors abeg

if what you wrote was true and correct then you have no option in hitting back,that is normal human reaction and instinct for self preservation,if your mother could be all of what you wrote above in behavior and action then I am sorry she has lost the respect and privilege to be a mother,if my mother(may her soul rest in peace) ever pushed me against the wall and hit me,I will not endanger my hands in hitting her I will go and get koboko or cane for her,it is the timidity of you and your father that is the cause she is doing nonsense,every human being deserves respect even a small kid,if you desrespect and rubbish yourself then you can't earn the respect of others,do not apologize to her,call her relatives and inform them of what happened,warn her seriously that anytime she rants,raves or dare touch you,she will see hell that day,read the riot act to her in a clear ,strong and firm voice.

Fahdiga:
For insulting a man like me who is ever fit to pregnant you, It will no longer be 8ft, it will be 20ft and above in future

You are still brainless

You had built-up anger and hateed towards your mother. It was bound to be let loose one day. It's just a pity the way you unleashed it.

Apologize to her and your dad. Maybe you could call your dad and talk to him first.

This kind mother no go gree forgive even if you beg her. It's with you Nna.

Mr man you messed up big time. Go find every way to make her forgive you. Ensure she forgives you.

Fahdiga:
For always insulting men, 8ft and above awaits you tomorrow

Who be this abeg

There's no light you went to her house . The woman is frustrated abeg. Your daddy didn't do well in music and you still want to tow his lane, how do you expect your mom to be happy about it? Buy fuel na if there's no light if it's easy

Yomit71:

you still lack sense, what that means is no man is perfect. we fall into mistakes we never imagine ourselves in

You fall into mistakes because you are erratic and also lack direction. Don't say "we" , say "I".
There's no joint stupidity. Stupidity is personal.
Own it.

It is well....may God forgive you and double forgive your mother. What a woman she is! How dare she pushed you to the wall. Biko avoid her nd her location for a while....let her not bring out the beast in you. It is well.

Fahdiga:
You try. kudos. May your children lift you 8ft above the ground and leave you to fall yakata in future in Jesus name amen

must you comment?

Moz22:
Actually typing this with a heavy heart and so much disgust for what I've done.. wish I had handled the situation better.

My father is the best man I could ever wish for and if I had another chance to pick a dad again in my next life, I'll pick a richer version of him but my mom?? Sigh!

However growing up with them was so stressful in every way u can think of.. my dad was the meek type, soft spoken and slow to react but my mom would always complain about everything, she fights everything and everyone.. never afraid of any form of confrontation, she would complain about my hairstyle, she would check if I sagged my trousers.. she monitored me extremely and always nagged about it.. I'm this typa guy who is well cultured, I wouldn't say I got that from home training tho cos I do not drink, smoke nor womanize... And I think it's d joy of every parent to have child like me, I basically had no friends visiting me then and even up till now. I've got trust issues that's why I don't keep friends.. my mom made my youthful days hell for me, I didn't really enjoy it.. times I spent with her were miserable as she would shout everyday, quarrel even over phone conversations that you would think the person she's fighting with was right in front of her.. and some times I even pity my dad whenever she starts with him. I developed some sorta hatred for her

Lately I've been spending more time with them cos of our last born just so I could keep an eye on him and we stayed close too.. and the way she treats him makes me wonder if she was the one gave birth to him, if I was away when she was pregnant for him and delivered.. I would have argued that she was his mother. There were times that I had to pass the night there and her voice or rants would be what will wake me up very early in the morning just as it used to be when I used to be there...

I used to think that as people grow old, they become calmer but that isn't the case with my mom, she's more violent... She lost her twin sis last year March and I sincerely hoped that would change atleast but iro nio... Her other sisters aren't even speaking to her at the moment. My dad was a musician.. old age won't allow him continue doing music, coincidentally I picked up that barton.. been doing the same music(live musician) all my life but my mom has always been against it.. she was never happy whenever I carry my dad's guitar to rehearse or whenever I bring a piano home.. it was always war...

Been there since last weekend cos of the poor electricity in my area.. we have had power for about 7 days now.. Had gone for a studio session, only to return in d evening and I was greeted with shouting over a very trivial issue, I was so angry that I responded to every of her verbal insults.. and then she hit me and I reciprocated which I felt so bad about almost immediately.. she dragged me by my clothes shouting that I must kill her again, by that time.. my anger had subdued and all I had on my mind was to leave the house immediately. She threatened to arrest me.. She tore my shirt and I managed to pull away from her.. and left without picking my stuffs. All my life, I have never raised up my hands to hit a woman talkless of my mom.. I don't even beat kids when they do wrong, I hate to see tears..

I know it's a disgraceful thing to do. I've got no excuse for what I've done whatsoever. I even avoid confrontations with my own gender sef cos I know what I'm capable of. I'm always quick to say the word sorry just to avoid prolonged issues. I had been offline since it happened, just came here to drop this and I know how much insults I'm gonna get here anyway but we learn everyday and will surely pick the ones that will make me a better person.. no one's perfect

Pls ignore my typo errors abeg

I understand you Mr Op, and I appreciate your sincerity but make sure you ask God for forgiveness and seek you mum's forgiveness also, and do not forget to speak to your daddy about it too, he will not be happy with you for hitting his wife.

Iyaebe:
You know nothing,there are certain things you don’t dare irrespective of situation you may find yourself,I never praised his mom for her habits in any way but told him to do the needful to avoid future reoccurrence.In life one has to be very careful and mindful of what we do in our youth,a simple mistake can cause misfortune for generations unborn and if you can’t leave wealth for your future generations to come at least don’t create curses for them .He has no right to do what he did as two wrongs can never make a right.Most of the things that happens in most homes you see today sprung up from somewhere,you know nothing.Tell him the truth so he can make amends,don’t lead him on to destruction.

oga leave this nonsense statement. the young man is human too. just because you gave birth to a person does not give you the right to physically , emotionally and psychologically traumatised them, even the bible advised parents not to provoke their children .
do to others what you will like others to do unto you
I went through the same thing as that young man so I understand his pain. some women are very very violent emotionally and can damage you beyond repair psychologically and emotionally. I suffered high b.p at age 25 because of my own mother. she actually enjoys quarrels and trouble making with me ,shouting over things that do not matter and even saying things like"it would be better to adopt than to have the kind of kids she has ".
though I never hit her if not God I would have done worse than hitting her.

so stop encouraging bad behaviour of parents . their children are humans too and deserve a form of respect and also apologies too.
the young man will not suffer any thing from his children as long as he is the victim.

Moz22:
Actually typing this with a heavy heart and so much disgust for what I've done.. wish I had handled the situation better.

My father is the best man I could ever wish for and if I had another chance to pick a dad again in my next life, I'll pick a richer version of him but my mom?? Sigh!

However growing up with them was so stressful in every way u can think of.. my dad was the meek type, soft spoken and slow to react but my mom would always complain about everything, she fights everything and everyone.. never afraid of any form of confrontation, she would complain about my hairstyle, she would check if I sagged my trousers.. she monitored me extremely and always nagged about it.. I'm this typa guy who is well cultured, I wouldn't say I got that from home training tho cos I do not drink, smoke nor womanize... And I think it's d joy of every parent to have child like me, I basically had no friends visiting me then and even up till now. I've got trust issues that's why I don't keep friends.. my mom made my youthful days hell for me, I didn't really enjoy it.. times I spent with her were miserable as she would shout everyday, quarrel even over phone conversations that you would think the person she's fighting with was right in front of her.. and some times I even pity my dad whenever she starts with him. I developed some sorta hatred for her

Lately I've been spending more time with them cos of our last born just so I could keep an eye on him and we stayed close too.. and the way she treats him makes me wonder if she was the one gave birth to him, if I was away when she was pregnant for him and delivered.. I would have argued that she was his mother. There were times that I had to pass the night there and her voice or rants would be what will wake me up very early in the morning just as it used to be when I used to be there...

I used to think that as people grow old, they become calmer but that isn't the case with my mom, she's more violent... She lost her twin sis last year March and I sincerely hoped that would change atleast but iro nio... Her other sisters aren't even speaking to her at the moment. My dad was a musician.. old age won't allow him continue doing music, coincidentally I picked up that barton.. been doing the same music(live musician) all my life but my mom has always been against it.. she was never happy whenever I carry my dad's guitar to rehearse or whenever I bring a piano home.. it was always war...

Been there since last weekend cos of the poor electricity in my area.. we have had power for about 7 days now.. Had gone for a studio session, only to return in d evening and I was greeted with shouting over a very trivial issue, I was so angry that I responded to every of her verbal insults.. and then she hit me and I reciprocated which I felt so bad about almost immediately.. she dragged me by my clothes shouting that I must kill her again, by that time.. my anger had subdued and all I had on my mind was to leave the house immediately. She threatened to arrest me.. She tore my shirt and I managed to pull away from her.. and left without picking my stuffs. All my life, I have never raised up my hands to hit a woman talkless of my mom.. I don't even beat kids when they do wrong, I hate to see tears..

I know it's a disgraceful thing to do. I've got no excuse for what I've done whatsoever. I even avoid confrontations with my own gender sef cos I know what I'm capable of. I'm always quick to say the word sorry just to avoid prolonged issues. I had been offline since it happened, just came here to drop this and I know how much insults I'm gonna get here anyway but we learn everyday and will surely pick the ones that will make me a better person.. no one's perfect

Pls ignore my typo errors abeg

I had such experience with my mum too
She was severely had on me
Even if am sick
She wouldn't even care to ask about my health talk more of medication
Buh I never insulted her nor refused her anything
But now that am on my own now
We are like best of friends
Now I found out that God was using it to make me broken

My advice is that you appease her
Ask her to forgive
Buy her things she likes
I believe she would also learn from the incident

What a sad and unfortunate incident! No matter how disgusting one parent is, never is it a child's headache to be confrontational about it. I hope you have apologized to her and ask your entire family members to do same? Your heaven lies under her feet.

Hmmm.. it's been a while lot scanning thru everyone's comment, certainly have picked the useful ones and of course, trashed the useless ones. Sincerely appreciate y'all, idobale mi re oo. Goodnight

UpLoyo:
I'm not even gonna read whatever nonsense you wrote to justify anything but just going by the title: you hit your mother? Then you must be ready to die young, there's no prayer that can avert that unless that woman from the bottom of her heart prays for you. She doesn't need to say a word or curse you, you've brought a curse upon your life automatically. Congrats welcome to a life of misery. How could someone beat his own mother, is she a goat that ate you food?

are u kidding me?

tonididdy:
I hate that situation.
Growing up as a child, I could be rude to my mom or have a tuggle but never hit her.

That's the line right there... Is a point of no return, all relationship is entirely lost no matter how much you ask for forgiveness and pamper her. It's a memory that will never leave you both.


... Just live with it and plan your life around yourself, that excuse of living with your kid bro because you want to monitor him is lame. GET YOUR ASS OUT OF YOUR PARENTS HOME.

I really don't see any crime in spending time with my dad and younger bro.. maybe not my mum cos we don't see eye to eye even before d incident

LilMissFavvy:
You sound like you are in support of what the OP did. If the OP came here and opened a thread about having a difficult mother, my comment would have been different. For the OP to raise his hands on his mom, is clear that he has never been a good child, take it or leave. No matter the provocation. A good provoked son would have walked out on her.

Which sane climes? Is it the sane climes where children stand up against their parents? Sane climes where children call the cops on their parents for minor offenses? If that woman was as bad as he said, his musician father would have left her or taken another wife. She definitely is a difficult mother, but some of us dropping comments for him had a difficult mother or father, yet we loved them, made adjustments and sailed through.

sigh!

Reference:
Just to round up, two things and one best way out.

First, the apology kite everyone is flying.
Yes, he should apologise for the violent retribution. That was foolish.
The danger however is that in these parts apologies are often misconstrued. so they embolden the abuser where such an individual is purely emotional and lack rational thinking.
The consequence will be the worsening of the situation and a potential expansion to engulf others, which leads to the second point.

Leaving the house.
Once more this looks rational on the surface but for heavens sake he has a kid brother "to take care of'.
It doesn't take a genius to determine that all the fall out will come on that lad and it is almost certain the sad incident will repeat itself, perhaps to a worse degree.
For we all know the younger generation is less condescending and more assertive across board.
So 'out of his experience' it is better for him to remain and be the 'isolator', which leads me to the last point and my suggestion to him.

Which is to apologise with a 'straight face'.
Then go seek an intermediary to mediate since your dad has been 'conquered'.
Such a person MUST be one who she respects and listens to but most importantly a person that is steeped in wisdom and not given to sentiment, trado-cultural correctness and will be an impartial referee ready to repair the damage to the family as a whole first, then your relationship with her, secondarily.

My two cents.

wow.. u talk like u were in my shoes

Nocommonsense:
parents having issues with their children is normal especially when a child get to 18years above the child feel he/she is an adult now and no one can control him/her anymore. Trust me the op is between the age 18-23 that when the pressure is always high

lmao well age doesn't really matter.. I'm quite older than olamide but he commands far greater respect than I could ever imagine. So u see it isn't about age.

Moz22:
lmao well age doesn't really matter.. I'm quite older than olamide but he commands far greater respect than I could ever imagine. So u see it isn't about age.

o feel so much for you.... This is a child's worst nightmare.

Moz22:
Actually typing this with a heavy heart and so much disgust for what I've done.. wish I had handled the situation better.

My father is the best man I could ever wish for and if I had another chance to pick a dad again in my next life, I'll pick a richer version of him but my mom?? Sigh!

However growing up with them was so stressful in every way u can think of.. my dad was the meek type, soft spoken and slow to react but my mom would always complain about everything, she fights everything and everyone.. never afraid of any form of confrontation, she would complain about my hairstyle, she would check if I sagged my trousers.. she monitored me extremely and always nagged about it.. I'm this typa guy who is well cultured, I wouldn't say I got that from home training tho cos I do not drink, smoke nor womanize... And I think it's d joy of every parent to have child like me, I basically had no friends visiting me then and even up till now. I've got trust issues that's why I don't keep friends.. my mom made my youthful days hell for me, I didn't really enjoy it.. times I spent with her were miserable as she would shout everyday, quarrel even over phone conversations that you would think the person she's fighting with was right in front of her.. and some times I even pity my dad whenever she starts with him. I developed some sorta hatred for her

Lately I've been spending more time with them cos of our last born just so I could keep an eye on him and we stayed close too.. and the way she treats him makes me wonder if she was the one gave birth to him, if I was away when she was pregnant for him and delivered.. I would have argued that she was his mother. There were times that I had to pass the night there and her voice or rants would be what will wake me up very early in the morning just as it used to be when I used to be there...

I used to think that as people grow old, they become calmer but that isn't the case with my mom, she's more violent... She lost her twin sis last year March and I sincerely hoped that would change atleast but iro nio... Her other sisters aren't even speaking to her at the moment. My dad was a musician.. old age won't allow him continue doing music, coincidentally I picked up that barton.. been doing the same music(live musician) all my life but my mom has always been against it.. she was never happy whenever I carry my dad's guitar to rehearse or whenever I bring a piano home.. it was always war...

Been there since last weekend cos of the poor electricity in my area.. we have had power for about 7 days now.. Had gone for a studio session, only to return in d evening and I was greeted with shouting over a very trivial issue, I was so angry that I responded to every of her verbal insults.. and then she hit me and I reciprocated which I felt so bad about almost immediately.. she dragged me by my clothes shouting that I must kill her again, by that time.. my anger had subdued and all I had on my mind was to leave the house immediately. She threatened to arrest me.. She tore my shirt and I managed to pull away from her.. and left without picking my stuffs. All my life, I have never raised up my hands to hit a woman talkless of my mom.. I don't even beat kids when they do wrong, I hate to see tears..

I know it's a disgraceful thing to do. I've got no excuse for what I've done whatsoever. I even avoid confrontations with my own gender sef cos I know what I'm capable of. I'm always quick to say the word sorry just to avoid prolonged issues. I had been offline since it happened, just came here to drop this and I know how much insults I'm gonna get here anyway but we learn everyday and will surely pick the ones that will make me a better person.. no one's perfect

Pls ignore my typo errors abeg

You did it because you've bottled up a lot for so long. Have you ever really taken out time to pray and fast for your mom? You might have done so, but this time, pray and fast and specifically pray for her. After that, visit her with a gift and get on your knees and beg her. Even if she refuses, you have done your part. Never exchange words her again. Try and be more playful with her. Praise her always and never neglect her. God bless.

DKM123:
When I first saw the caption, I was irritated and immediately thought you must have been influenced by idi"otic red-okpillas on nairaland who call themselves Alfa nails yet have nothing to show for it.

Then I read your write up and felt the pain and instant remorse in the letters and how you wish you could undo what you did.....

I understand you. You aren't a bad person. Your mother shouldn't have raised her hands on you as a grown adult as well. That's unfair. That's abuse as well. You must have reacted back in a split second without thinking. It happens.
Stop beating yourself up.


LET YOUR MUM KNOW HOW YOU FEEL AND HOW YOU HAVE ALWAYS FELT GROWING UP. WRITE A HEARTFELT LETTER TO HER. THEN APOLOGIZE.

You don't have to use words like hatred on her though cos that's extreme. She is your mother. She OBVIOUSLY cares about you. She just has a bad character. A character she had even before you were born. Does that now mean she hates you? Naaaa! She probably was the one making all your meals for this one week you were there.

She nags about your hair, about your sagging trousers, about you taking up music as a career but believe it or not, they all come from a place of care even though she is going about it the wrong way.. This woman who fed you, bathed you, clothed you, worried about you when you were sick etc actually does care. Saying you hate her is a wicked word to use. I guess you learnt that from nairaland.

Anyway, I wish you well.

it's been tears deep down my spirit for days now.. I sometimes see the relationships btw my colleagues and their parents and I wished I had one with my mom but we don't even see eye to eye. I made efforts to close that gap, called her sisters to speak to her on my behalf but she will only pretend to listen and the return to her normal behavior. I'm tired honestly. My younger sister couldn't deal, she's just 25yrs.. she had to rent up an apartment in ajah, entirely far from here just so she could have peace.. I even decided to stay close so I could get an eye on my last born but mehn.. anyway I do not take ur advise for granted

Moz22:
Hmmm.. it's been a while lot scanning thru everyone's comment, certainly have picked the useful ones and of course, trashed the useless ones. Sincerely appreciate y'all, idobale mi re oo. Goodnight

Haa Op
Haven't you gone to apologise to your mom and dad since?
Are you sure you are not wasting too much time?
Have you even informed your dad personally up till now??

kingemi:


Haa Op
Haven't you gone to apologise to your mom and dad since?
Are you sure you are not wasting too much time?
Have you even informed your dad personally up till now??

she's away, far away in ondo state.. and I'm somewhere unknown to no one

Zeus201:
First of all, you messed up by hitting a woman talk more of your mother but you have not done the worse thing known to man. If there was no sin there would be no forgiveness.
Solution:
1. Beg your dad for forgiveness and afterwards ask him to broker peace with your mom for you but being a hot tempered woman I doubt she would forgive immediately but still do it
2. If you are up to 21and have the means, leave the house to avoid further provocation, in doing so you gain your respect and in due time you can rescue you brother from that toxic environment
3. Pray to God for forgiveness, this should be no. 1 self, ask for wisdom and restraint. The Bible asks children to obey their parents in the Lord but admonishes parents not to provoke their children to anger.

After wards, go on your merry way and pursue your career, many people have done worse and still ended up successful because they understood that it's pointless letting the past way you down and don't think too much about any curses because it's God that has the final say to curse or bless.

Take care bro .

My picture obviously looks like I'm 21.. lol. Two things I think I got from her, she doesn't age, I don't age.. she's got temperament issues, I've got mine too. My kid sis is 26, my bro is 15.. I know I'm not a bastard anyway

Kelvin3476:
oga so shame gree u type this nonesense ? i no go read this nonesense u are writing here becus u gat no excuse. ogun kee u there.

only if u had connections with ogun.. really?

Moz22:
she's away, far away in ondo state.. and I'm somewhere unknown to no one

Op you really need to make a move of faith and go to that Ondo at least before the end of today...
And try to put call to your dad please.

Are you happy as your mind is still troubled like this?
Since I've been in nearly a similar case, I can relate,...that's why you should try and reach out to her and apologize so you can be happy at least with yourself.

Mbok I want to hear a good feedback from you ASAP
May the good Lord forgive and bless you.