₦airaland Forum

Kasaliola:
Good evening house... please I need your help.. if there is any marriage counselor or therapist. This could be lengthy and lot of typo... Please forgive me.. I open a new account for this.

I Am a father of two.. have been dating my wife since 2009, before we got married in 2014. But before the we got married we have been a love birds whereby everybody loves the way we cuddled ourself..

Its started in 2011 before I rented my first apartment, my parents didn't want me to marry her and her parents too, especially her big brother and sisters.. though it caused a lot of commotion then. But thank God they allowed cuz we forcefully told them we are meant for each other, I even speak bad words to my mother then, saying If I don't marry her in ur present I will marry her in her absent, those words hurt so dearly so she has to leave me and go ahead with my plans. And same thing with my wife family.

In 2012 I rented my own apartment and started living me.. I can't forget the very first day I raise my hands on her, I felt ashame of my self.. I don't care what she does or say then.. but I regretted doing so, I cried at the middle of the road cuz I don't know what came over me.

The only problem I have with her is that she swings mood. Always moody everytime and my parents noticed this when they come around and when she went to thier place..
This made me beat her plus the ways she disrespected me.. after doing this shameful thing, I will now come back to my senses and started begging her. I even beat her this Sunday.. all I want is someone to talk to on how I can stop this beating.. how I can tolerate her lifestyle... Am so mad and ashamed of my self.. if help me...

Thank you

You beat your wife and you're wondering why she's always moody? You're very foolish sha

Financial stress can change many a good lover. Oga take it easy, every storm blows over at some point. Meanwhile, u guys can seek counseling as a way to work out ur issues. Whenever u feel anger rising, take a deep breath and count up to 10 before exhaling. May God forgive ur indiscretions.

Kasaliola:
Good evening house... please I need your help.. if there is any marriage counselor or therapist. This could be lengthy and lot of typo... Please forgive me.. I open a new account for this.

I Am a father of two.. have been dating my wife since 2009, before we got married in 2014. But before the we got married we have been a love birds whereby everybody loves the way we cuddled ourself..

Its started in 2011 before I rented my first apartment, my parents didn't want me to marry her and her parents too, especially her big brother and sisters.. though it caused a lot of commotion then. But thank God they allowed cuz we forcefully told them we are meant for each other, I even speak bad words to my mother then, saying If I don't marry her in ur present I will marry her in her absent, those words hurt so dearly so she has to leave me and go ahead with my plans. And same thing with my wife family.

In 2012 I rented my own apartment and started living me.. I can't forget the very first day I raise my hands on her, I felt ashame of my self.. I don't care what she does or say then.. but I regretted doing so, I cried at the middle of the road cuz I don't know what came over me.

The only problem I have with her is that she swings mood. Always moody everytime and my parents noticed this when they come around and when she went to thier place..
This made me beat her plus the ways she disrespected me.. after doing this shameful thing, I will now come back to my senses and started begging her. I even beat her this Sunday.. all I want is someone to talk to on how I can stop this beating.. how I can tolerate her lifestyle... Am so mad and ashamed of my self.. if help me...

Thank you

Stop beating her she is not a drum,,
If she gets u angry,dress up and leave the house go to a bear parlor and drinks two bottles or three, go home and sleep later

You're talking about her mood swings, yet you're the one who've got mood swings that makes you beat and cry later.

You're a nincompoop and a lowlife for beating that lady.

Send her to her father's house before you kill her. I don't advice abusers like you because you will never change.

Kasaliola:
Good evening house... please I need your help.. if there is any marriage counselor or therapist. This could be lengthy and lot of typo... Please forgive me.. I open a new account for this.

I Am a father of two.. have been dating my wife since 2009, before we got married in 2014. But before the we got married we have been a love birds whereby everybody loves the way we cuddled ourself..

Its started in 2011 before I rented my first apartment, my parents didn't want me to marry her and her parents too, especially her big brother and sisters.. though it caused a lot of commotion then. But thank God they allowed cuz we forcefully told them we are meant for each other, I even speak bad words to my mother then, saying If I don't marry her in ur present I will marry her in her absent, those words hurt so dearly so she has to leave me and go ahead with my plans. And same thing with my wife family.

In 2012 I rented my own apartment and started living me.. I can't forget the very first day I raise my hands on her, I felt ashame of my self.. I don't care what she does or say then.. but I regretted doing so, I cried at the middle of the road cuz I don't know what came over me.

The only problem I have with her is that she swings mood. Always moody everytime and my parents noticed this when they come around and when she went to thier place..
This made me beat her plus the ways she disrespected me.. after doing this shameful thing, I will now come back to my senses and started begging her. I even beat her this Sunday.. all I want is someone to talk to on how I can stop this beating.. how I can tolerate her lifestyle... Am so mad and ashamed of my self.. if help me...

Thank you

You no well at all. Can you hit back at a military man? If yes, keep beating her, if no, you have no excuse hitting your wife then

Kasaliola:
Good evening house... please I need your help.. if there is any marriage counselor or therapist. This could be lengthy and lot of typo... Please forgive me.. I open a new account for this.

I Am a father of two.. have been dating my wife since 2009, before we got married in 2014. But before the we got married we have been a love birds whereby everybody loves the way we cuddled ourself..

Its started in 2011 before I rented my first apartment, my parents didn't want me to marry her and her parents too, especially her big brother and sisters.. though it caused a lot of commotion then. But thank God they allowed cuz we forcefully told them we are meant for each other, I even speak bad words to my mother then, saying If I don't marry her in ur present I will marry her in her absent, those words hurt so dearly so she has to leave me and go ahead with my plans. And same thing with my wife family.

In 2012 I rented my own apartment and started living me.. I can't forget the very first day I raise my hands on her, I felt ashame of my self.. I don't care what she does or say then.. but I regretted doing so, I cried at the middle of the road cuz I don't know what came over me.

The only problem I have with her is that she swings mood. Always moody everytime and my parents noticed this when they come around and when she went to thier place..
This made me beat her plus the ways she disrespected me.. after doing this shameful thing, I will now come back to my senses and started begging her. I even beat her this Sunday.. all I want is someone to talk to on how I can stop this beating.. how I can tolerate her lifestyle... Am so mad and ashamed of my self.. if help me...

Thank you

Clap for yourself.

mate i think this analogy can help him reset his brain, if it doesn't then i am sure village people is on top of his matter

stacyadams:
Drop ur number..don't beat her ..if u kill her na prison be ur new home, ur children will be orphans over night....always use late singer osinachi as a case study...

Her family was against u marrying her...if u kill her, trust me they will mess u up...people who beat their wives to death never saw it coming...there brain automatically reset in Kiri Kiri...
Learn self control....assuming u kill her. One day ...u will be in person, family members will turn ur kids to house helps...now ask yourself is that the kind of future u want....

Real men don't beat women

You ain't ready to be a real man

Please,,,learn how to tolerate a woman..

Kasaliola:
Good evening house... please I need your help.. if there is any marriage counselor or therapist. This could be lengthy and lot of typo... Please forgive me.. I open a new account for this.


The only problem I have with her is that she swings mood. Always moody everytime and my parents noticed this when they come around and when she went to thier place..
This made me beat her plus the ways she disrespected me.. after doing this shameful thing, I will now come back to my senses and started begging her. I even beat her this Sunday.. all I want is someone to talk to on how I can stop this beating.. how I can tolerate her lifestyle... Am so mad and ashamed of my self.. if help me...

Thank you

. Since you've taken the most difficult 1st step which is "admiting you are wrong" the next step shouldnt be difficult ... what you have to do is see [b]"your wife as an image of yourself" [/b]cos no matter how mad you get at yourself you can't beat yourself, maybe that is why marriage is foster as "ONEness"
In my observation i notice men who talkless stand better chances of "anger management" around women

Well done for recognizing the wrong you're doing, this is the first step. Many people never even get here.

You should definitely seek out counselling to help you.

A book I would recommend is 'the courage to be disliked'

In it it gives an example that demonstrates that anger is controllable. For example, if Mike Tyson slaps you for no reason whatsoever, do you think you will slap him back? Highly unlikely. Why though? You'll think it unfair, you'll be blind with rage, yet you won't slap him back?

So you can control your anger if you become more aware of it and slow down. Seek that help and work on yourself, you can be better as you try.

Kasaliola:
Good evening house... please I need your help.. if there is any marriage counselor or therapist. This could be lengthy and lot of typo... Please forgive me.. I open a new account for this.

I Am a father of two.. have been dating my wife since 2009, before we got married in 2014. But before the we got married we have been a love birds whereby everybody loves the way we cuddled ourself..

Its started in 2011 before I rented my first apartment, my parents didn't want me to marry her and her parents too, especially her big brother and sisters.. though it caused a lot of commotion then. But thank God they allowed cuz we forcefully told them we are meant for each other, I even speak bad words to my mother then, saying If I don't marry her in ur present I will marry her in her absent, those words hurt so dearly so she has to leave me and go ahead with my plans. And same thing with my wife family.

In 2012 I rented my own apartment and started living me.. I can't forget the very first day I raise my hands on her, I felt ashame of my self.. I don't care what she does or say then.. but I regretted doing so, I cried at the middle of the road cuz I don't know what came over me.

The only problem I have with her is that she swings mood. Always moody everytime and my parents noticed this when they come around and when she went to thier place..
This made me beat her plus the ways she disrespected me.. after doing this shameful thing, I will now come back to my senses and started begging her. I even beat her this Sunday.. all I want is someone to talk to on how I can stop this beating.. how I can tolerate her lifestyle... Am so mad and ashamed of my self.. if help me...

Thank you

Kasaliola:
Good evening house... please I need your help.. if there is any marriage counselor or therapist. This could be lengthy and lot of typo... Please forgive me.. I open a new account for this.

I Am a father of two.. have been dating my wife since 2009, before we got married in 2014. But before the we got married we have been a love birds whereby everybody loves the way we cuddled ourself..

Its started in 2011 before I rented my first apartment, my parents didn't want me to marry her and her parents too, especially her big brother and sisters.. though it caused a lot of commotion then. But thank God they allowed cuz we forcefully told them we are meant for each other, I even speak bad words to my mother then, saying If I don't marry her in ur present I will marry her in her absent, those words hurt so dearly so she has to leave me and go ahead with my plans. And same thing with my wife family.

In 2012 I rented my own apartment and started living me.. I can't forget the very first day I raise my hands on her, I felt ashame of my self.. I don't care what she does or say then.. but I regretted doing so, I cried at the middle of the road cuz I don't know what came over me.

The only problem I have with her is that she swings mood. Always moody everytime and my parents noticed this when they come around and when she went to thier place..
This made me beat her plus the ways she disrespected me.. after doing this shameful thing, I will now come back to my senses and started begging her. I even beat her this Sunday.. all I want is someone to talk to on how I can stop this beating.. how I can tolerate her lifestyle... Am so mad and ashamed of my self.. if help me...

Thank you

So you don't know that the day you got married you became one flesh. Have you ever seen a man beating himself. You will call him a mad man. That's what you are. Remember that, each time you raise your hand against her.

Beating your wife shows you are a weakling. Can you stand up to fight a man when you are provoked at any instance

I have a cousin that behaves like her too, whenever she's annoyed she says disrespectful thing's to me my parents and i beat her almost every time it happens.

Irrelevant things annoys her, she doesn't like to be scolded yet she makes stupid mistakes. When you try to correct her she yells so i beat her. She'll be 18 this year.

Why i my bringing this up?

I'm just scared she might turn me to a wife beater, but honestly thats the only language she understands. And i hate that fact.

Jennyclay:
@kasaliola I don't blame you. I only blame your wife here.

What are some women still doing in an abusive and terrible marriage?? If you claim you're still there because of the children.. If you die through domestic violence your children would still be living thier lives comfortably.

INFACT, your children will hate you in your grave for not absconding from that abusive marriage when you had the chance because they would believe you deliberately rendered them motherless.

Just see how op is beating his wife like he's in a competition with Anthony Joshua. Nawa oo!!

violence against women should be condemned by all means and women should stop believing that a man is going to change. HE CAN NEVER CHANGE!!

I wonder why a man would raise his hands and hit a woman he claims to LOVE. I wish moderators could push this thread to crime section because this man will kill his wife any moment from now oo!!

May God help us all.

As life being fair to you, what are you still doing in the world

Kasaliola:
Good evening house... please I need your help.. if there is any marriage counselor or therapist. This could be lengthy and lot of typo... Please forgive me.. I open a new account for this.

I Am a father of two.. have been dating my wife since 2009, before we got married in 2014. But before the we got married we have been a love birds whereby everybody loves the way we cuddled ourself..

Its started in 2011 before I rented my first apartment, my parents didn't want me to marry her and her parents too, especially her big brother and sisters.. though it caused a lot of commotion then. But thank God they allowed cuz we forcefully told them we are meant for each other, I even speak bad words to my mother then, saying If I don't marry her in ur present I will marry her in her absent, those words hurt so dearly so she has to leave me and go ahead with my plans. And same thing with my wife family.

In 2012 I rented my own apartment and started living me.. I can't forget the very first day I raise my hands on her, I felt ashame of my self.. I don't care what she does or say then.. but I regretted doing so, I cried at the middle of the road cuz I don't know what came over me.

The only problem I have with her is that she swings mood. Always moody everytime and my parents noticed this when they come around and when she went to thier place..
This made me beat her plus the ways she disrespected me.. after doing this shameful thing, I will now come back to my senses and started begging her. I even beat her this Sunday.. all I want is someone to talk to on how I can stop this beating.. how I can tolerate her lifestyle... Am so mad and ashamed of my self.. if help me...

Thank you

As a married man I can say women swing mood a lot
It's very common with them

Used to bother me with my wife when we got married

It took time before I understood, that's how many of them behave. Because they are very emotional

But I have never lifted my hand to beat my wife
I can't even do that, no matter the provocation
It's not in my nature

Maybe you consult a counselor and also bring it to God in prayers

I've never hit anyone before and never will. That you're a violent person doesn't mean other people are.

usah4:
...now tell me if you've never hit a lady before in your life (Sister, Girlfriend, Wife, Student, slave etc)

Kasaliola:
Good evening house... please I need your help.. if there is any marriage counselor or therapist. This could be lengthy and lot of typo... Please forgive me.. I open a new account for this.

I Am a father of two.. have been dating my wife since 2009, before we got married in 2014. But before the we got married we have been a love birds whereby everybody loves the way we cuddled ourself..

Its started in 2011 before I rented my first apartment, my parents didn't want me to marry her and her parents too, especially her big brother and sisters.. though it caused a lot of commotion then. But thank God they allowed cuz we forcefully told them we are meant for each other, I even speak bad words to my mother then, saying If I don't marry her in ur present I will marry her in her absent, those words hurt so dearly so she has to leave me and go ahead with my plans. And same thing with my wife family.

In 2012 I rented my own apartment and started living me.. I can't forget the very first day I raise my hands on her, I felt ashame of my self.. I don't care what she does or say then.. but I regretted doing so, I cried at the middle of the road cuz I don't know what came over me.

The only problem I have with her is that she swings mood. Always moody everytime and my parents noticed this when they come around and when she went to thier place..
This made me beat her plus the ways she disrespected me.. after doing this shameful thing, I will now come back to my senses and started begging her. I even beat her this Sunday.. all I want is someone to talk to on how I can stop this beating.. how I can tolerate her lifestyle... Am so mad and ashamed of my self.. if help me...

Thank you

Stop focusing on your wife and focus on yourself. Develop yourself as a person cos if you're happy within yourself then nothing can make you to beat your wife regardless of what she does.

MaryMo:
You are obviously not in your right senses to think such a man just needs help, he needs proper reset, let him travel to the US and do that to ANY woman.

He has done it several times with no consequences so he thinks it is alright

You have still not proffered any solution. You don't need to insult me, just tell him what to do to become a better person. Thank you

The characters your wife is exhibiting shows that she needs a teacher and not a bully. As a man you are to teach her with patients and tolerance. That's why God mad man the head. The man is a teacher, councilor, priest, care giver etc.

Dude learn this and it will help you.

NOTE "Getting angry is a choice"

It's not mandatory that you get angry at any slight.
Learn to master your emotions. If you can master your emotion, you can control your pulse when it want to react to whatever triggers you to anger. always recall that you have the right not to get angry and equally has the right to get angry if you wish, it's a choice and not mandatory.

By so doing you see yourself controlling situations and circumstances that controls other's that has not master this act.
And you will have peace.

Getting angry is a choice. Master the act

UpInTheSky:
I've never hit anyone before and never will. That you're a violent person doesn't mean other people are.

And who said I am a violent person.

If your female colleague at work offended you, will you beat her.

You won't because you know you may lose your job and even get arrested.

Any time u feel angry and disrespected , remember that outside ur home u can control ur temper,try the same self control at home.

No be the same papa&mama born u and it wife ,so understand when she acts the way she does.
In addition, learn to walk away,leave the house,go hang out small for one bar or joint or football centre ,cool head for there,the come back home.With time u would be matured enough to know say beating no the change anybody.

Continue. Everybody to their life.

If you are a Muslim, nothing you can do about it because you have been formatted that way. I know of an Alfa who normally use cane to beat his third wife anytime she misbehaves. He said it's allowed in their religion.
You will def kill her one day.

You're already a wife beater since you think the solution to making stupid mistakes & yelling is to beat a woman. You are just doing press-up with your cousin before you meet your wife.

colizee:
I have a cousin that behaves like her too, whenever she's annoyed she says disrespectful thing's to me my parents and i beat her almost every time it happens.

Irrelevant things annoys her, she doesn't like to be scolded yet she makes stupid mistakes. When you try to correct her she yells so i beat her. She'll be 18 this year.

Why i my bringing this up?

I'm just scared she might turn me to a wife beater, but honestly thats the only language she understands. And i hate that fact.

Your eyes never clear...continue to beat her.
You for try Edo lady..na pestle you for receive for head!

Kasaliola:
Good evening house... please I need your help.. if there is any marriage counselor or therapist. This could be lengthy and lot of typo... Please forgive me.. I open a new account for this.

I Am a father of two.. have been dating my wife since 2009, before we got married in 2014. But before the we got married we have been a love birds whereby everybody loves the way we cuddled ourself..

Its started in 2011 before I rented my first apartment, my parents didn't want me to marry her and her parents too, especially her big brother and sisters.. though it caused a lot of commotion then. But thank God they allowed cuz we forcefully told them we are meant for each other, I even speak bad words to my mother then, saying If I don't marry her in ur present I will marry her in her absent, those words hurt so dearly so she has to leave me and go ahead with my plans. And same thing with my wife family.

In 2012 I rented my own apartment and started living me.. I can't forget the very first day I raise my hands on her, I felt ashame of my self.. I don't care what she does or say then.. but I regretted doing so, I cried at the middle of the road cuz I don't know what came over me.

The only problem I have with her is that she swings mood. Always moody everytime and my parents noticed this when they come around and when she went to thier place..
This made me beat her plus the ways she disrespected me.. after doing this shameful thing, I will now come back to my senses and started begging her. I even beat her this Sunday.. all I want is someone to talk to on how I can stop this beating.. how I can tolerate her lifestyle... Am so mad and ashamed of my self.. if help me...

Thank you

I can't condemn you because it seem clear that you sincerely need help as you can't control Ur sudden burst of anger.

May be you should answer the following questions:
Do I still love her?
Why do I keep beating her?
Can I tolerate her flaws or if not (oga it is beta u say bye bye to her)?

TRULY give your life to Jesus, every other thing will be added to you.

My brother, either good or bad you have made a decision in life and you must learn to live by the decision, manage it and get through with it.

Mood swing is not a disease, since you know her better, give her the space, pray for her to stabilize, as she grows up there is high possibility that she will change.

Never in your life beat a lady for one reason, it may be used against you by Law in court or in the police station and it may even land you in prison if care is not taken. Take for example, if the lady is the type that faint at will, if you slap her one day and she refuse to open eyes, you are in for it, the best thing is to avoid her in argument, issues and anything that leads to anger between the both of you. Excuse yourself once you notice it is heating up and take a walk. That is maturity.

Finally, you may need to take your wife out for a treat, and as she is enjoying herself in the groove. Let her know you guys need to talk about some serious things. List out your points one after the other and be precise and in humble manner. Let her respond to each point with the best way she wants to change, you can also encourage her in words, and after all close the discussion with words of prayer because sometime that mood swing could be as a result of been spiritually possessed and it may require deliverance. After talking to her about it severally and she does not change. See your pastor please. Cheers!

You need someone to teach u how to stop beating your wife. Cut off ur 2 hands. Very simple

Kasaliola:
Good evening house... please I need your help.. if there is any marriage counselor or therapist. This could be lengthy and lot of typo... Please forgive me.. I open a new account for this.

I Am a father of two.. have been dating my wife since 2009, before we got married in 2014. But before the we got married we have been a love birds whereby everybody loves the way we cuddled ourself..

Its started in 2011 before I rented my first apartment, my parents didn't want me to marry her and her parents too, especially her big brother and sisters.. though it caused a lot of commotion then. But thank God they allowed cuz we forcefully told them we are meant for each other, I even speak bad words to my mother then, saying If I don't marry her in ur present I will marry her in her absent, those words hurt so dearly so she has to leave me and go ahead with my plans. And same thing with my wife family.

In 2012 I rented my own apartment and started living me.. I can't forget the very first day I raise my hands on her, I felt ashame of my self.. I don't care what she does or say then.. but I regretted doing so, I cried at the middle of the road cuz I don't know what came over me.

The only problem I have with her is that she swings mood. Always moody everytime and my parents noticed this when they come around and when she went to thier place..
This made me beat her plus the ways she disrespected me.. after doing this shameful thing, I will now come back to my senses and started begging her. I even beat her this Sunday.. all I want is someone to talk to on how I can stop this beating.. how I can tolerate her lifestyle... Am so mad and ashamed of my self.. if help me...

Thank you

Any human right lawyer in the house that deals with divorce case. Someone is in need of your assistance in Ibadan. Please kindly contact this 09154680125

The only thing that can stop you from beating her is all the insult here on nairaland ,you are a mad man .

emmanuelbrown26:
Is she a kid? Hell no.
If she's having any regret, she should come forward and tell d husband than using being moody as an excuse.
I don't support domestic violence but using that method to passage a message is a turn off and nonsense.

It's a turn off but it could have been triggered. That's why I asked those questions.

She's not a kid, but people deal with issues in different ways. If he doesn't know his wife that he fought for, that he has to come to strangers, then there is something fundamentally wrong.