₦airaland Forum

IamMobisola:
Everybody is ambitious, there is no man or woman in this life that is not ambitious in life.
She chose the second job because it pays higher than the first one and she gets a higher position. The guy doesn't want her going far away from him so that he can keep an eye on her which speaks Insecurity . He is her boyfriend and not her husband, he doesn't have any right to make decisions for her. If they were married then she would need to stay close to her husband but their relationship was barely three months when he told her to not take the second job because it is far from him.

The reason why he mentioned that she was ambitious was because she said the second job was like a promotion for her in her career plus the higher salary. That's why he said that

Shugargal:
With all due respect, You guys should stop making marriage a priority or do or die thing, that's why many women fall into wrong hands just because of marriage pressure. Life is more difficult now when you're broke.

bukatyne:
@bold:

A joke right?

HopeNeverDies:
Nope!!! Damnn!!! It's not a Joke. I'm being serious. Have you been in that kind of position before ?

gaby:
I would have said to hear his side of the story before passing judgement.

However, if it is indeed as you have narrated here, I wonder what it is you are disappointed in when it is clear as day that you are dodging a missile here.

Dude is clearly a narcissist and isn't hiding this fact one bit.

This kind envy and jealousy na witchcraft own...


He doesn't deserve you....

bigpicture001:
It's. Not complex. If. U understand women... This. Same lady here typing this story will dump him. On flimsy excuses when she settles with the. New job.. sh will want a man who earns far higher than him... That is how. Women think

Now ask yourself , who was her guy before sh started dating this high earning boifrend of hers.. yes.. sh be someone in the. Lower wage structure.. sh moved higher.. same way sh will also move higher with another man..

Women rate men only by what they earn.. if u don't believe this theory.. mark. My moniker.. u will. Later relate this with me in ur lifetime...

The guy did the right thing... What sh would HV done is to show the. Guy string desire sh will not change. Or dump him..

Candidlady:
While having this INEXCLUSIVE relationships with the MULTIPLE lab rats are they allowed to get intimate with em ?

bukatyne:
@bold:

Why would I be in such demonic position?

bukatyne:
1. If you drop the competitive mindset, there would be areas you are better than her that she can look up to you. There would also be some areas she is better than you & you would look up to her. The idea of marriage is for both of you to harness all your resources and emerge better than either of you.

2. Good. There is a way ambition makes a person looks alive.

womenareapez:
you said the purest truth and not everyone will believe this truth!

The fellow men criticising this man are the reall low self-esteem poverty sinking men to that particular y tribe who will go so far to married their white grandmother as wife just for visa

That op will never date anyman below her pay income and will probably dumb him in the future!

This the man has seen and worked on it

julie90:
I have been working for this company for two years. In December 2021, there was a change in management, a new manager was assigned to my Department. Before the change in management, I applied for some jobs in November 2021 but I didn't get any response.

Things between my new manager and I developed really quickly (he is not married and he is 10 years older than me). Although we have been working together, when he became the new manager we started dating. it was mutual, it wasn't like he forced me. We liked each other and we started dating in March 2022. We kept things professional in the office. Nobody in the office knows about this even till now.

Those companies I applied to in November 2021 reached out to me for an interview. I got two offers at the same time. Both offers come with great pay (similar to what my boyfriend currently earns) and a significant boost to my career. I spoke to my boyfriend about it and being my boss he told me to reject both offers, he told me he would be able to cater for my needs that the only commitment he has now is paying for his house and once he is done paying for it, he would have more money to take care of me and I didn't need a job where they would pay me what he's currently earning and be in a role similar to his.

I told him it's not the money but it would be about moving up the ladder in my career. These are offers people do not have, now I have two, he is asking me to reject them. He told me even if I have to move the only offer I should take is the one close to the company where we work which has a lower pay compared to the second offer. I told him I would go with the second offer which has more opportunities for me. Both offers are in the same state although my preferred offer is a bit far from where I live but it is still a reasonable location to commute everyday. At one point he told me, I was too ambitious and I took it as a compliment.

I noticed he changed since then, he informed the company management that I was leaving and we began the handover process, I noticed he changed after we had the discussion about me accepting the second offer but I thought it was about him missing me. May 31 was my last day and I noticed few days to my last day he was acting strange so I asked him what the matter was. He said he doesn't feel anything for me and we should stop seeing each other.

This is a man that was really excited when we were dating, all of a sudden doesn't feel anything for me because I got a high paying job? Is it wrong for a woman to be ambitious? When has it become a crime for a woman to aim high in her career? My role will still be to support him. I have never been rude to him and I am not going to be rude to him because we now earn the same salary. I really like him and I feel disappointed that he could act this way.

Is it now a crime for a woman to be ambitious?

GreatVocalist:
It seems you failed to look beyond his words. I think the main problem here is the feeling that you don't think he's capable enough to fulfil his duties as a man. He offered to take care of the needs, and he didn't ask you to quit your job.

It's surprising how his feelings for you depreciated, right? Yeah, one of the things that attracts a man more to a woman is her ability to listen when he speaks. Your constant and firm rejection of his suggestions doused the fire. He even suggested you took the first offer which wouldn't take you far from him. Meaning another reason is he didn't want you to go far from him, he treasured the closeness. Yet, you refused.

He was perturbed with the thought that you would hardly listen to him on important matters if he had decided to get to the next stage with you. So to him, you chose your career over his authority as a man.

These are natural laws that God has set for humans. We can't change them. Sometimes, you have to let go of some ambitions to make things in life work out for you. A man who wants to be the lord of his house won't take in a woman who doesn't listen to him. I don't think it was really about the salary. If it was, he wouldn't have asked you to go with the first offer.

julie90:
I have been working for this company for two years. In December 2021, there was a change in management, a new manager was assigned to my Department. Before the change in management, I applied for some jobs in November 2021 but I didn't get any response.

Things between my new manager and I developed really quickly (he is not married and he is 10 years older than me). Although we have been working together, when he became the new manager we started dating. it was mutual, it wasn't like he forced me. We liked each other and we started dating in March 2022. We kept things professional in the office. Nobody in the office knows about this even till now.

Those companies I applied to in November 2021 reached out to me for an interview. I got two offers at the same time. Both offers come with great pay (similar to what my boyfriend currently earns) and a significant boost to my career. I spoke to my boyfriend about it and being my boss he told me to reject both offers, he told me he would be able to cater for my needs that the only commitment he has now is paying for his house and once he is done paying for it, he would have more money to take care of me and I didn't need a job where they would pay me what he's currently earning and be in a role similar to his.

I told him it's not the money but it would be about moving up the ladder in my career. These are offers people do not have, now I have two, he is asking me to reject them. He told me even if I have to move the only offer I should take is the one close to the company where we work which has a lower pay compared to the second offer. I told him I would go with the second offer which has more opportunities for me. Both offers are in the same state although my preferred offer is a bit far from where I live but it is still a reasonable location to commute everyday. At one point he told me, I was too ambitious and I took it as a compliment.

I noticed he changed since then, he informed the company management that I was leaving and we began the handover process, I noticed he changed after we had the discussion about me accepting the second offer but I thought it was about him missing me. May 31 was my last day and I noticed few days to my last day he was acting strange so I asked him what the matter was. He said he doesn't feel anything for me and we should stop seeing each other.

This is a man that was really excited when we were dating, all of a sudden doesn't feel anything for me because I got a high paying job? Is it wrong for a woman to be ambitious? When has it become a crime for a woman to aim high in her career? My role will still be to support him. I have never been rude to him and I am not going to be rude to him because we now earn the same salary. I really like him and I feel disappointed that he could act this way.

Is it now a crime for a woman to be ambitious?

julie90:
I have been working for this company for two years. In December 2021, there was a change in management, a new manager was assigned to my Department. Before the change in management, I applied for some jobs in November 2021 but I didn't get any response.

Things between my new manager and I developed really quickly (he is not married and he is 10 years older than me). Although we have been working together, when he became the new manager we started dating. it was mutual, it wasn't like he forced me. We liked each other and we started dating in March 2022. We kept things professional in the office. Nobody in the office knows about this even till now.

Those companies I applied to in November 2021 reached out to me for an interview. I got two offers at the same time. Both offers come with great pay (similar to what my boyfriend currently earns) and a significant boost to my career. I spoke to my boyfriend about it and being my boss he told me to reject both offers, he told me he would be able to cater for my needs that the only commitment he has now is paying for his house and once he is done paying for it, he would have more money to take care of me and I didn't need a job where they would pay me what he's currently earning and be in a role similar to his.

I told him it's not the money but it would be about moving up the ladder in my career. These are offers people do not have, now I have two, he is asking me to reject them. He told me even if I have to move the only offer I should take is the one close to the company where we work which has a lower pay compared to the second offer. I told him I would go with the second offer which has more opportunities for me. Both offers are in the same state although my preferred offer is a bit far from where I live but it is still a reasonable location to commute everyday. At one point he told me, I was too ambitious and I took it as a compliment.

I noticed he changed since then, he informed the company management that I was leaving and we began the handover process, I noticed he changed after we had the discussion about me accepting the second offer but I thought it was about him missing me. May 31 was my last day and I noticed few days to my last day he was acting strange so I asked him what the matter was. He said he doesn't feel anything for me and we should stop seeing each other.

This is a man that was really excited when we were dating, all of a sudden doesn't feel anything for me because I got a high paying job? Is it wrong for a woman to be ambitious? When has it become a crime for a woman to aim high in her career? My role will still be to support him. I have never been rude to him and I am not going to be rude to him because we now earn the same salary. I really like him and I feel disappointed that he could act this way.

Is it now a crime for a woman to be ambitious?

TheGift:
The person with the low self esteem is the one who .
1. Measures himself with someone else including His wife &
2. The one who needs someone to be lesser than Him in order to feel important.

Sounds like you?

Instead of telling His wife not to take the job why not go and get a better paying job, since that his what His manhood is tied to?

The answer is poor self esteem, and lack of confidence in capacity to handle a strong woman.

cococandy:
He’s a destiny killer.
Men like him are wicked.

GloriousGbola:
You know coco don vex when she goes full Mummy Go

julie90:
I have been working for this company for two years. In December 2021, there was a change in management, a new manager was assigned to my Department. Before the change in management, I applied for some jobs in November 2021 but I didn't get any response.

Things between my new manager and I developed really quickly (he is not married and he is 10 years older than me). Although we have been working together, when he became the new manager we started dating. it was mutual, it wasn't like he forced me. We liked each other and we started dating in March 2022. We kept things professional in the office. Nobody in the office knows about this even till now.

Those companies I applied to in November 2021 reached out to me for an interview. I got two offers at the same time. Both offers come with great pay (similar to what my boyfriend currently earns) and a significant boost to my career. I spoke to my boyfriend about it and being my boss he told me to reject both offers, he told me he would be able to cater for my needs that the only commitment he has now is paying for his house and once he is done paying for it, he would have more money to take care of me and I didn't need a job where they would pay me what he's currently earning and be in a role similar to his.

I told him it's not the money but it would be about moving up the ladder in my career. These are offers people do not have, now I have two, he is asking me to reject them. He told me even if I have to move the only offer I should take is the one close to the company where we work which has a lower pay compared to the second offer. I told him I would go with the second offer which has more opportunities for me. Both offers are in the same state although my preferred offer is a bit far from where I live but it is still a reasonable location to commute everyday. At one point he told me, I was too ambitious and I took it as a compliment.

I noticed he changed since then, he informed the company management that I was leaving and we began the handover process, I noticed he changed after we had the discussion about me accepting the second offer but I thought it was about him missing me. May 31 was my last day and I noticed few days to my last day he was acting strange so I asked him what the matter was. He said he doesn't feel anything for me and we should stop seeing each other.

This is a man that was really excited when we were dating, all of a sudden doesn't feel anything for me because I got a high paying job? Is it wrong for a woman to be ambitious? When has it become a crime for a woman to aim high in her career? My role will still be to support him. I have never been rude to him and I am not going to be rude to him because we now earn the same salary. I really like him and I feel disappointed that he could act this way.

Is it now a crime for a woman to be ambitious?

GreatVocalist:
These are natural laws that God has set for humans. We can't change them. Sometimes, you have to let go of some ambitions to make things in life work out for you. A man who wants to be the lord of his house won't take in a woman who doesn't listen to him..

Khoielvis:
Hypocrite. Ofcourse you won't be able to stomach your hypocrisy. C'mon get lost

Thatwasepic:
You have to find a trade off between your career and your life, don't sacrifice your life because of your career or you might wake up one day 40 years with no kids. You are a woman you have a biological clock. If you are in your 30s your chances of finding a high value man or the man of your dream diminishes by 50 percent from when your are in your 20s you might have to settle for less and that's where marital problems start, thinking you should have had better. Don't ever sacrifice your life because of a career is not worth it at the end . Good luck

Unshackled:
stop being emotional. Kiss the hard truth

Khoielvis:
Woe betide your father. Iwo omo ale la sa n la San. Don't bother quoting me for the rest of your miserable existence. Oto Le jati jati

Unshackled:
stop being emotional. Kiss the hard truth

Connected1:
Are you sure if you earn more than your future husband you will give him his maximum respect.

Men value respect more than Food, if you are certain you won't change then he's totally wrong. NB: how you treat those under you goes a long way here, if he had noticed you treating them very bad then he's right and understands how most women are.

It's very rare for a woman to respect a man she's above his level.

Most guys who go for women richer than them or above their class are golddiggers.

Personally I don't admire women richer than I am, even if she's madly in love with me, I value my sanity first, who get time to dae argue about equality and gender roles.

Mtchewww.

Khoielvis:
When you start to date, do not date exclusively so you don't self assume that you met your soulmate just like that.

Start by dating inexclusively with up to 3 person's. Then discuss such issues early and watch each person's response and attitude during t hose discussions. Their response will reveal the best fit.

I've come to realize that in relationships, most people who come into our lives only come to waste time and take space. At the same time, hinder us from meeting more meaningful person's.


The same lady above would have ignored better person's while sticking with this only to meet this disappointment. Because from the onset, he was never the one, but a time waster


To move fast in thesedays where time is scarce, we must quickly identify people who only want to take space and waste our time and cut them off

Khoielvis:
Hypocrite. Go and marry your road side girls.

Khoielvis:
Hypocrite. Go and marry your road side girls.