My dear sis, don't listen to those calling your family entitled.

Those same family are the ones that will be there for you if your marriage doesn't work out.

They are the ones to intercede for you when things are wrong in your marriage and elders need to be invited.

If he doesn't regard your family before marriage, he will deal with you and you won't have any defence.

If he had issues with any member of your family, a sensible man will discuss the issues with you so you can handle it first.

My dear, go and carry plate of Thanksgiving and ignore the birds of a feather with plenty likes on front page calling your family entitled.

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

He Dodged a bullet, your family are bunch of emotional blackmailers .

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

My dearest sister
Just thank your God that you did not entered into the devils dean


Between the time you met him and the time you took him to your parents was too short
Extremely too short

If you are desperate for marriage, talk to God not man

You do not even understand this guy and you are set for marriage

No love but managed love

No respect but insult

No regards and value for you and your family

Now tell me, do you want to be a slave and a servant to marriage

Pls start searching
this guy is a no for me

ahnie:
Ekwueme!Ekwueme!!
You're the living God oh
Eze no one like you.


That wasn't just a song,there lies the answers you seek.

A quick reminder as a brain teaser,that song up there was sang by osinachi.

honestly to be candid uve really got a lot sense of humor

DaddyFreeze2020:
You should be thanking God that his character was exposed to you.

Na backhand slaps you for dey receive for your marriage.

That is not his real character bro. Maybe the bride price list they gave him was discouraging. Maybe he saw something in the family that he doesn't like

All I see is parental irresponsibility. U said Ur dad had no objection about family introduction. Most lackadaisical father's have their daughters in an abusive marriage. Look Ur father should have had a date with him, know the type of person he is. Before Agreeing to even see his parents. A comprehensive family meeting should be carried out by Ur father. Just thank Ur star u escaped this one . U for understand.

Wike Turned Popular Song ‘As E Dey Pain Dem’ Into Rivers State Anthem


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HuqPF3cRQPM

laluski:


My sister, go to church and roll on the floor 21 times to our Lord God Almighty!! You have escaped the clutches of Satan in form of that frog you call a fiancee.. You don't know what God did for you..God loves you..few...very few have escaped what you just escaped..you for see danfo call am coaster bus...you better block and delete him, his family and all that's attached to him.. sorrow and calamity is not your portion...Your husband is close to you..just keep praying..he'll find you soon...

He was the one that actually escaped Satan

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

My dear, you just dodged a hot, fast bullet. That guy doesn't send you an inch, and your marriage would be filled with one trouble after the other.

Congratulations. Go do thanksgiving in church next Sunday.

Babe, move on with your life, you will heal with time.

Don't mind those supporting the guy, I am a guy and his attitude shows all the signs of a guy that doesn't send a lady, he sees himself as doing you a favor.

Free him, God will provide a better man.

Last words: Never turn your back on your family for any man or woman; they are the people you would fall back on when the chips are down. A manipulator will make you desert your family, and then seriously deal with you in the marriage, knowing you have no relative to run to.

Best wishes.

faithfull18:
So, I am reading comments here from men saying they are doing a woman a favour marrying her and I laugh.

The comments are long and I really don't want to quote anybody.

Ladies, a man should go all out for you, even the men in the Bible did. Little details matter. @OP, but for the distance, I wish you guys were in the same Physical location maybe it could have turned out differently. What would it have cost him to apologise? Does it make him less manly. I doubt the guy was fully committed to marrying you. Guys want good marriages as well as ladies. Nobody is doing anybody a favour marrying anybody if you are a quality person.

As a lady, na them go dey rush you, they just may not be the type of people you want to be in a livelong relationship with due to career, lifestyle, convictions, age, location and a host of other reasons. That's where these men get it wrong, men aren't scarce as they paint it here.

Good, quality, responsible, disciplined and truly godly men are the hard to find ones.

Na them dey rush u? The rush u see there could be guys doing everything to have u(have sex with u and dump u). Abeg nor let rushing u becloud your sense of reasoning o.

A mature lady and gentlemen should know that is not every matter u would involve ur family, now where u want ur man to satisfy ur anuty and parent u have cancel ur married,

Starting a new relationship and finding who is ready now is where u occupy

Can I know you please.
U burst my head with ur comment

GboyegaD:
You are the one I should ask if you are ready for marriage. I wonder how you allowed people get into your head. You said he argued with your aunt, and you were pained. Should he keep quiet if he's not okay with whatever the cause of the argument was because he wants a marriage?

I don't even understand how your aunt was pissed that he didn't call to thank her for taking you to the market to buy the engagement clothes. Was he the one who suggested you approach your aunt to help you? If he is not, then he doesn't owe her that obligation. If he chooses to say thank you, so be it and if he doesn't, no big deal.

Lastly, your parent's (mom in particular) reservation indirectly beclouded your thought and you suggesting you put the wedding on hold gave him the opportunity to think through the entire thing. Perhaps, you guys were going on a fast lane and that statement made him think and also, have conversation with his folks who might have felt with this much troubles from external influences before the wedding, he should just save his head.

Like the Yorubas will say, "Oju to ma ba ni kale, kin ti a ti owuro se pin" implying, whatever would last long doesn't stress you from inception. You both are lucky in your ways and you both should see it as each party is right with his/her decision.

I just needed to add this, in your next relationship (whether he comes back or a new relationship), remember you both are the prize and treat each other that way. If he doesn't treat you like a prize or you can't treat him as one, please, be quick to move. Don't be carried away by the people of the world who have no place in your home. Imagine some telling you to do thanksgiving when you were the one who put the wedding on hold should tell you they are like dance instructors who teaches you to dance but will never borrow you their legs to do the dance.

GboyegaD:
You are the one I should ask if you are ready for marriage. I wonder how you allowed people get into your head. You said he argued with your aunt, and you were pained. Should he keep quiet if he's not okay with whatever the cause of the argument was because he wants a marriage?

I don't even understand how your aunt was pissed that he didn't call to thank her for taking you to the market to buy the engagement clothes. Was he the one who suggested you approach your aunt to help you? If he is not, then he doesn't owe her that obligation. If he chooses to say thank you, so be it and if he doesn't, no big deal.

Lastly, your parent's (mom in particular) reservation indirectly beclouded your thought and you suggesting you put the wedding on hold gave him the opportunity to think through the entire thing. Perhaps, you guys were going on a fast lane and that statement made him think and also, have conversation with his folks who might have felt with this much troubles from external influences before the wedding, he should just save his head.

Like the Yorubas will say, "Oju to ma ba ni kale, kin ti a ti owuro se pin" implying, whatever would last long doesn't stress you from inception. You both are lucky in your ways and you both should see it as each party is right with his/her decision.

I just needed to add this, in your next relationship (whether he comes back or a new relationship), remember you both are the prize and treat each other that way. If he doesn't treat you like a prize or you can't treat him as one, please, be quick to move. Don't be carried away by the people of the world who have no place in your home. Imagine some telling you to do thanksgiving when you were the one who put the wedding on hold should tell you they are like dance instructors who teaches you to dance but will never borrow you their legs to do the dance.

Don't mind her. I don't know why she thinks the man should worship her.

Thats how a girl told me she want a breakup. I said no problem. Later she came back and called me wicked. That why did I allow her to leave.
I was like "so you expect me to beg you to stay?"

I wonder why she wanted to leave in the first place and expect me to stop her from leaving. God punish that my ex.

Can I know you please.
U burst my head with ur comment.

GboyegaD:
You are the one I should ask if you are ready for marriage. I wonder how you allowed people get into your head. You said he argued with your aunt, and you were pained. Should he keep quiet if he's not okay with whatever the cause of the argument was because he wants a marriage?

I don't even understand how your aunt was pissed that he didn't call to thank her for taking you to the market to buy the engagement clothes. Was he the one who suggested you approach your aunt to help you? If he is not, then he doesn't owe her that obligation. If he chooses to say thank you, so be it and if he doesn't, no big deal.

Lastly, your parent's (mom in particular) reservation indirectly beclouded your thought and you suggesting you put the wedding on hold gave him the opportunity to think through the entire thing. Perhaps, you guys were going on a fast lane and that statement made him think and also, have conversation with his folks who might have felt with this much troubles from external influences before the wedding, he should just save his head.

Like the Yorubas will say, "Oju to ma ba ni kale, kin ti a ti owuro se pin" implying, whatever would last long doesn't stress you from inception. You both are lucky in your ways and you both should see it as each party is right with his/her decision.

I just needed to add this, in your next relationship (whether he comes back or a new relationship), remember you both are the prize and treat each other that way. If he doesn't treat you like a prize or you can't treat him as one, please, be quick to move. Don't be carried away by the people of the world who have no place in your home. Imagine some telling you to do thanksgiving when you were the one who put the wedding on hold should tell you they are like dance instructors who teaches you to dance but will never borrow you their legs to do the dance.

Romanoff:
My dear sis, don't listen to those calling your family entitled.

Those same family are the ones that will be there for you if your marriage doesn't work out.

They are the ones to intercede for you when things are wrong in your marriage and elders need to be invited.

If he doesn't regard your family before marriage, he will deal with you and you won't have any defence.

If he had issues with any member of your family, a sensible man will discuss the issues with you so you can handle it first.

My dear, go and carry plate of Thanksgiving and ignore the birds of a feather with plenty likes on front page calling your family entitled.

For judging this issue based on what you heard from one party, you lack wisdom.

laluski:


My sister, go to church and roll on the floor 21 times to our Lord God Almighty!! You have escaped the clutches of Satan in form of that frog you call a fiancee.. You don't know what God did for you..God loves you..few...very few have escaped what you just escaped..you for see danfo call am coaster bus...you better block and delete him, his family and all that's attached to him.. sorrow and calamity is not your portion...Your husband is close to you..just keep praying..he'll find you soon...

I believe you wrote this sarcastically

U didn't ask what really happened btw the guy and the family that made him change his attitude, I can't marry a lady whose family controls or who is always listening to her family..

Something must have happened for the guy to suddenly change and her story is half baked

Why should I say thank you for taking your niece to the market,it's not mandatory, and u can't be canceling marriage like that thinking you will make me a SIMP and succumb to you

Forget ALPHA men get egos, all men including her father and sometimes women too like being entitled

Shezzman:
Can I know you please.
U burst my head with ur comment

Lol...

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

You shouldn't have pressed his neck for not appreciating your aunt since you have done that yourself. It was something he was supposed to do but if he fails, then it wasn't something that should have caused issue.

Then I think you went so fast by telling him to put things on hold. He too became worried and scared probably you have lost interest in everything

You ladies should mind the way you dish out words sometimes

We want to hear the guy's side of the story too.

Kobojunkie:
Something out of the ordinary caused a person to behave rudely to his partner's relatives and have no intentions of apologizing for his behavior.

So, every time a person misbehaves, it is village people to blame abi wetin?

Which yeye misbehave? The op should kuku tell us her family want the guy to be worshipping them. Is op perfect in her dealing with the guy's family? Yet the guy didn't complain or even show it to the Op. I'm sure b the time she turn 30, she will wise up and ensure that her family stay clear of her relationship

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

We want to hear from the guy's side of the story too.

jeromestarks:

Don't mind her. I don't know why she thinks the man should worship her.

Thats how a girl told me she want a breakup. I said no problem. Later she came back and called me wicked. That why did I allow her to leave.
I was like "so you expect me to beg you to stay?"

I wonder why she wanted to leave in the first place and expect me to stop her from leaving. God punish that my ex.

I'm not sure she thinks she should be worshipped. I think her problem is she's not grown enough to know a marriage relationship is between two adults.

Kobojunkie:
Something out of the ordinary caused a person to behave rudely to his partner's relatives and have no intentions of apologizing for his behavior.

So, every time a person misbehaves, it is village people to blame abi wetin?

Did you read the part where her aunty was expecting him for taking her niece for introduction shoppings. I feel the OP's family feels entitled

jeromestarks:

For judging this issue based on what you heard from one party, you lack wisdom.

Go and hear from the second party.

A lot of you here are evil but you conceal it with being "alpha males or Redpillers".

Do you know the guy, is the op not the only one in the relationship that is telling the story?

Instead of making judgement based on facts provided, you're telling me I lack wisdom for judging without hearing from the second party.

Sorry sir, please, invite the second party so the court of social media can hear his own side.

Kindly don't mention me again cause I'm not sure I'll be able to maintain civility.

Congratulations. You dodged a bullet. Do you mean to tell me you don't recognize that guy has character flaw?

Let him go biko, so that you don't come back here with hide my identity advice me blah blah lamentation stories.

A man who wants to marry should be respectful to inlaws. He is already arguing and being rude to your people. The signs are showing already and you are still asking if he loves you?My dear, face your God who will give you a man to live you well and respect you. A man that respects you will respect your family.


If you like to and beg him and shook your head, anything you see you take it. And beside a marriage starts with introduction, why will your Dad say because of logistics issues, they should wave it? But they will brave the logistics issue to come do marriage rites Abi?

Next time introduction is where you meet both families and see their family dynamics for yourself.

Make that guy waka abeg.

Kobojunkie:
Something out of the ordinary caused a person to behave rudely to his partner's relatives and have no intentions of apologizing for his behavior.

So, every time a person misbehaves, it is village people to blame abi wetin?

So he cannot speak up when he's not okay with their decision abi.

My sister was once having a relationship with someone like this, with no single regard for my parent, not even his own parents too, not that he is bringing anything to my family table besides the introduction he came for, and even if he does he has no right to talk back at my family. my dad was quick to notice his attitude so he reused the collection of the bride price but it was done in private so the public doesn't take notice. The guy's attitude didn't change, he became a problem always hitting my sister and talking down on my parents when they argue, trust me as the first son as soon as I discovered I traveled down from my location in Ghana and went right to his house, I spoke to my sister and also to the guy, we had a manly conversation and I even advise him on his nonchalant attitude to which be promised to change even his dad can attest to this but while I was with them during my period of visit this guy never changed, I refuse to interfere at some point to get my facts right but made sure he didn't lay his hands on my sister, since he refused to be sane, I taught him a serious lesson and I jejely pack my sister out of his house with her consent before I murder a confused gender who isn't matured for marriage, lest I forget they had a daughter together and she has been a blessing to our life. The father has chosen to be a deadbeat dad but we don't care my aim for his child is to put her in a top place that the father thinks she won't attain without his support. I will always protect my family at all costs no matter what.

Aguiyimba:
So he cannot speak up when he's not okay with their decision abi.

He can speak up ofcourse but being rude about it is another thing entirely.

By the way, did OP reveal exactly what decision it was that the man supposedly spoke up against?

.

Candidlady:



You rang him back after two weeks for two weeks... good two weeks he didn't call. His mum didn't call.. His siblings didn't call


You had to ring him.. so if he had agreed on pushing through with the wedding you would have said yes


Iswear dawadawa expensive pass you (pissed)


You should be jubilating... get heaven dust, four cans of budweiser, a pack of dunhil and if you can afford captain Morgan... make yourself happy.. heaven just saved/liberated you from a curse

Be letting single to stupor ladies and bitter feminist without man in their lives give you advice.They would snatch at any man they get

You just dodged a bullet. Thank your God.

Move on.