Corridon:
One of my guys recently separated from his wife of two months after spending millions during wedding.

Two months?? Haaa!! Wahala wa ooo

BigBashiru:


What are the harsh realities of marriage?

Finance

Individual differences (background/ upbringing, social status, personal preferences and ways of doing things)

Compromise

At least you got one hundred and onety one likes��]A lot of people don't know what marriage is about.

Societal pressure force people who know next to nothing about marriage to marry.

Some men think it's only to provide, have sex and have a woman to birth and raise kids that marriage is all about.

Many women get married just to be Mrs. No preparation for the journey ahead.

I remember before I got married, I attended marriage seminar, read books, listened to messages from seasoned counsellors like Bimbo Odukoya, marriage counsellors from my church and pastors whose marriages I admire.

These days, how many young people will even read books about marriage and it's preparation or listen to messages or go to seminars for intending couples?[/quote]

Blame the whorress once the men go broke they these whorres are done they will now tag it abusive relationship or marriage

Men better focus more on your finances rather than taking the ladies serious

Nonexisting1:
It's not about dating. I have seen people that dated 5yrs and their marriage still crashed. Men today marry for nyash and breast and women marry for comfort and to form for their friends with few marrying to escape their family's pressure and problems. I have said it, I can not marry in this world, maybe in the next. I have met so many women and I am yet to see one that knows the true meaning of marriage. Even me, I'm not ready for the bullshit. My father will always say that if a man is not ready to raise an infant ekuke dog, he should never talk about marriage and my mother will add that if a woman is not ready to be a mother to a grown idiot, she should never think of marriage.

Your parents are indeed wise. God bless them for such information.

Nonexisting1:
It's not about dating. I have seen people that dated 5yrs and their marriage still crashed. Men today marry for nyash and breast and women marry for comfort and to form for their friends with few marrying to escape their family's pressure and problems. I have said it, I can not marry in this world, maybe in the next. I have met so many women and I am yet to see one that knows the true meaning of marriage. Even me, I'm not ready for the bullshit. My father will always say that if a man is not ready to raise an infant ekuke dog, he should never talk about marriage and my mother will add that if a woman is not ready to be a mother to a grown idiot, she should never think of marriage.

Lol, your mum opinion about marriage dey weird.

Nonexisting1:
Why wouldn't marriages crash when women go into them for what they can get and not what they will give. You can't withdraw money from back if you don't first make a deposit.

Do Nigerian women even have anything to offer in a marriage?

The psalmist says in psalm 11:3

If the foundation is destroy what can the righteous so.

Many marriages are established on a faulty foundation.

Between them, they don't know the difference between want and choice.

madridguy:
I hope the guy worth 10x of the millions spent on the wedding to avoid funny stories?

The guy is working as a lab attendant in a private hospital in Abuja. It was his parents who are retired local government workers that sponsored the wedding as per their first son.

Romanoff:


Finance

Individual differences (background/ upbringing, social status, personal preferences and ways of doing things)

Compromise

Finances is simple...let everyone make their own money and use it to take care of themselves.... females shouldn't stress their hisbands financially....as in a woman should be able to make the money she will use to be caring for her self....tho I will feed her (basic food only).

Trottle:
The trend is very worrying to be sincere.

However, when we choose to discard the old-age wisdom of doing in-depth background check and ensuring the necessary virtues and qualities are in place, and 'true' love/lost is not the main motivation to marry this is what we'll keep getting.

As youths we should also stop marrying to 'pepper' anybody, you'll be doing your mental health a disservice and also putting undue stress in your nascent marriage because you'll keep have to try to keep measuring up and ensure that the false picture you painted is not tainted.

Marriage is not a 100x100 metres relay race, you don't have to rush or go into it for flimsy reasons. Returning to the old (gold) standard will reverse this madness.

CC: MalignantGuest

I wish this comment was in the first page.

BigBashiru:


Finances is simple...let everyone make their own money and use it to take care of themselves.... females shouldn't stress their hisbands financially....as in a woman should be able to make the money she will use to be caring for her self....tho I will feed her (basic food only).

Everyone can make their money and economic changes can hit where one or both lose their source of income?

Is this a reason for a marriage to pack up?

No.

AstraDroid:
Marriage?

Women want to escape paying bills and want someone that will take care of their desires.
Men want companionship and their very own personalised pussy.

That's why they get married these days.

Ready bachelors want children but not baby mama's way.


Real marriage is for couples that are ready to design generational wealth structure and build legacy for their present and future generations. Such marriages do not fail.

this comment should have been in front page.

truthsayer009:


This RedPill you women are always complaining about, I want to ask you a question. Offline and Outside of Nairaland, have you met any male, whether in the Gym, at work, in a public transport or in church discussing RedPill? Marriage is Nigeria is very simplistic, all you need is 4 things. Plenty Money, good sex, no Infidelity & domestic violence. If all those things are covered, the woman will stay for 400 years. Whether you did counselling or not, as long these things are intact, nothing can happen.

Not complicated at all abeg.

Yes I have met redpillers offline but that's besides the point, are we not online and on this forum right now? I don't even understand the point you are trying to make, am I suppose to complain offline about redpill to people propagating it here with a thread of close to 2000 pages on romance section specially dedicated to complain and cry about women when it is ongoing online?

Even on this thread, boys are busy faulting women ONLY as the reason for failed marriages, yet you took it upon yourself to advice and quote who? Me? Are you scared of facing your fellows? Or you have selective gender based blindness when you are itching for who to quote?

Your "plenty money, good sex, no infidelity, domestic violence" that you said is needed in Nigerian marriages is what you men constantly destroy even if you have it in abundance, so direct your BS to your fellows if you are not scared of them and fvck off.

Romanoff:
A lot of people don't know what marriage is about.

Societal pressure force people who know next to nothing about marriage to marry.

Some men think it's only to provide, have sex and have a woman to birth and raise kids that marriage is all about.

Many women get married just to be Mrs. No preparation for the journey ahead.

I remember before I got married, I attended marriage seminar, read books, listened to messages from seasoned counsellors like Bimbo Odukoya, marriage counsellors from my church and pastors whose marriages I admire.

These days, how many young people will even read books about marriage and it's preparation or listen to messages or go to seminars for intending couples?

Some other people did this too and still chop breakfast

There is no formula to life

The man don wake see her real face. Bollo young

When you don't get your dating right, compromised your qualities you wanted in a woman for beauty, class, fake love or money, what do you expect. It must surely crash.

guobe:
A trend is now occurring in our society with most marriages crashing within 2 to 3 months of getting married.

All what most young couples care about is getting married but not staying married. They go about sharing asoebis and spending millions of naira to get married but will quickly run away from the marriage within a twinkle of an eye.

Most of the girls still have someone that they love more but choose to marry the guy that is ready to get married immediately.

Most guys get their fingers burnt out of desperation to just get married without properly dating.

I know a recent case study now as the new wife just left him as he complained to me that the wife was picking the calls of her ex boyfriend in their matrimonial home.

He said she even goes to visit her ex when he is at work.

It is such a shame what marriage is turning to nowadays.

guobe:
If you have ever gotten married you will know that the first few months of the marriage is full of temptations.Your ability to withstand the pressure of the first few months makes you a man.

Just curious, what are these pressures?

ceeceeuwa:

You don't get my point then. There will be no virgins left for the guys to marry as long as they have refused to stay celibate themselves. You can't eqt you r cake and have it!

That's where you're wrong.
Not all girls fall for guys they're not married to. Only those with whor3ing tendencies do that.

BigBashiru:


No it tells on men and women equally actually.....the guys that slept around look old too and run-down.....

Read this:

https://www.nairaland.com/7292532/virgin-man-virgin-woman-same

hustla:



Some other people did this too and still chop breakfast

There is no formula to life

No one said there's a formula to life or marriage but it's best to put in some effort and let God handles the rest.

Jovialjune1:


Yes I have met redpillers offline but that's besides the point, are we not online and on this forum right now? I don't even understand the point you are trying to make, am I suppose to complain offline about redpill to people propagating it here with a thread of close to 2000 pages on romance section specially dedicated to complain and cry about women when it is ongoing online?

Even on this thread, boys are busy faulting women ONLY as the reason for failed marriages, yet you took it upon yourself to advice and quote who? Me? Are you scared of facing your fellows? Or you have selective gender based blindness when you are itching for who to quote?

Your "plenty money, good sex, no infidelity, domestic violence" that you said is needed in Nigerian marriages is what you men constantly destroy even if you have it in abundance, so direct your BS to your fellows if you are not scared of them and fvck off.

You're just displaying anger all over the place with someone not fighting with you. I hope every thing is fine.

Cheers.

I would expect my marriage to crash, I expect partner to cheat, I expect divorce, I expect stabbing with knife, poisoning, I expect all this cos I married an unfeeling creature, I would rather die than give my all in my marriage, if the nonsense won crash make e crash, A huge lot of my assets would be hidden, and if she even gets to possess anything all will be liabilities, cars that av not been paid fully, houses on mortgage plans,

Jovialjune1:


Yes I have met redpillers offline but that's besides the point, are we not online and on this forum right now? I don't even understand the point you are trying to make, am I suppose to complain offline about redpill to people propagating it here with a thread of close to 2000 pages on romance section specially dedicated to complain and cry about women when it is ongoing online?

Even on this thread, boys are busy faulting women ONLY as the reason for failed marriages, yet you took it upon yourself to advice and quote who? Me? Are you scared of facing your fellows? Or you have selective gender based blindness when you are itching for who to quote?

Your "plenty money, good sex, no infidelity, domestic violence" that you said is needed in Nigerian marriages is what you men constantly destroy even if you have it in abundance, so direct your BS to your fellows if you are not scared of them and fvck off.

u knw urslf very well that's y u describe ur self in a essay, u re apt in saying u have selective gender based blindness" nobody can do a better job of telling u who u re other than u yourself

Most marriages crash because of the wrong purposes and high expectations people have before venturing into it.

Men who think marrying a very beautiful and curvy slay queen is a step higher than the other men should be ready to dance to the tune when all she has to offer is just the big yansh and fine face.

Raalsalghul:


Even with infidelity, so far the other three terms are constant most women in Nigeria will stay.

Exactly, so I don't understand all this anger the women are showing on this thread. So far those 3 terms are there, marriage continua.

Someone says it is RedPill that causes marriages not to work. I sincerely feel these women don't have a life outside of Nairaland because wetin concern failure of marriage with RedPill. Especially Nigeria where weddings are happening every day. Once you have money in Nigeria, marriage don set be that.

Like your marriage did not work, so na RedPill cause am? LMAOOO.

zed7:


I didn't go for counselling, didn't read any books and didn't even wed in a church. Been married 10 years now and I can't remember having issues with my wife. Never reported each other to anybody. We don't even raise our voices on each other. My sister went for marriage counselling, church programmes, wed in the church and yet, I keep settling issues.

I guess I'm lucky or maybe not. What I did was to carefully screen my partner and go for personality instead of just appearance alone. Yes, my wife is good looking but good looking isn't enough.

Anyway, my submission is that a successful marriage is between two people who click. All the counselling and prayers wouldn't do much if both parties don't know what they want and don't click.

bros, you are only lucky

If u be single dis days especially guys shine ur eye well well den no dey arrest late comers 4 marriage oooo take ur time make one useless witch no force u go where u never ready to go..

This is happening because generation of today upholds sex, money and materialism above marriage sacredness. People don't have patience and everything is all about sex and satisfaction. This is not what it should be

A direct consequence of incompatibility.

Anothe game These ladies play is dey form dem fit see future, they get married to men because his future looks bright, meanwhile they wont be contributing shit to make d future bright o, den if something happens along the line, perhaps client no pay again, or business no boom or oga lost his job then wahala go start.. then you will start seeing them for who dey really are..

jeromestarks:

That's where you're wrong.
Not all girls fall for guys they're not married to. Only those with whor3ing tendencies do that.

How will anyone ever want to marry a virgin when he keeps engaging in sexual relationships. Where will he get the one he will marry. They keep shouting they want virgins. if you ask them if they are ready to remain celibate in a relationship,they will say "how will I buy a good I have not tested?"