₦airaland Forum

UyaiIncomparabl:
April 10th, 2017 — a day I shall never forget in a hurry.

While eating my sumptuous rice together with my supposed date, then came the time to devour the chicken. At that time, I could not use cutleries so I devised other means (my hands). This chicken was so juicy and sweet that while eating and dragging it back and forth, it fell off my hand to the ground because I been dey drag bone.

I didn't know if to disappear or pick up the chicken. A whole fine girl like me. My date was just looking at me like a dunce. In his mind, he would have been thinking “werey ni girl yii sha”. That was one of the most embarrassing days of my life. I still cringe anytime I think about it. That day sha, the kind hunger wey been dey sama me ehn. I took no mercy on the chicken. Thankfully, bobo understood and we still laugh it out whenever I bring up the topic.

Adebisi0070:
Omo! this reminds me of a faithful day I had taken my crush out for lunch.

It was a sunday evening and we had gone to this newly opened fast-food joint to chill - Bills on me!

When we got there, she ordered jollof rice, chicken and moi-moi, and so did i. We also had a pack of hollandia yogurt each to step down our meal.

I did a rough calculation of everything in my head and it summed up to about 10k. I had 15k with me so no problem.

So we were busy eating and chatting when I overheard a customer complaining with raised voice. He had just been served his bill and he couldn't hide his anger at the exorbitant cost of his meal.

"10k for a plate of moi-moi? wetin una put inside!!"? He barked

When I heard moi-moi, I turned to his direction.

"This is corr.uption!" He yelled "Ordinary moi-moi 10k!"

When I looked at his table, I realized his moi-moi was even the small size, meanwhile we ordered the jumbo size.

I called one of the waitresses.

"Nne, biko how much is the moi-moi?" I whispered to her ear

"25k sir" She snapped

"No, I mean just the moi-moi, not the total bill" I voiced

"That's what am saying, sir" She reiterated "This is the jumbo pack and it's 25k for one"

At that moment the moi-moi in my mouth began tasting like agidi.

"Bia Nne" I leaned towards my crush "Can you run?"

"Run? why?" She asked in a confused tone

"Just answer, Yes or No?"

"Okay, Yes I can run. What's the problem?"

"Very good. See, when you hear, on your mark.. set.. Go! You will run outside with speed and take left while I take right"

"Nnamdi, i understand what you are saying, running to where?"

"Nne shut up first! When you reach house, you'll understand"

What's your experience?

abdulskulboy:
I am 26, I have never been on a date. Infact, I have ask any girl out. I come across many of those whom I admire in my university right now, but can't just out, not even on WhatsApp.

ashewoboy:
A picture of the fine girl.

UyaiIncomparabl:
If you can't spot her, don't bother. 🙄

DARLINGTON869:
Op is fucking lying. Moi moi 25k??
No be me you fit bobo abeg

purples25:
You are a very serious person and may God take you to the peak of success for not focusing on outings, women, and constant premarital sex.

Adebisi0070:
Omo! this reminds me of a faithful day I had taken my crush out for lunch.

It was a sunday evening and we had gone to this newly opened fast-food joint to chill - Bills on me!

When we got there, she ordered jollof rice, chicken and moi-moi, and so did i. We also had a pack of hollandia yogurt each to step down our meal.

I did a rough calculation of everything in my head and it summed up to about 10k. I had 15k with me so no problem.

So we were busy eating and chatting when I overheard a customer complaining with raised voice. He had just been served his bill and he couldn't hide his anger at the exorbitant cost of his meal.

"10k for a plate of moi-moi? wetin una put inside!!"? He barked

When I heard moi-moi, I turned to his direction.

"This is corr.uption!" He yelled "Ordinary moi-moi 10k!"

When I looked at his table, I realized his moi-moi was even the small size, meanwhile we ordered the jumbo size.

I called one of the waitresses.

"Nne, biko how much is the moi-moi?" I whispered to her ear

"25k sir" She snapped

"No, I mean just the moi-moi, not the total bill" I voiced

"That's what am saying, sir" She reiterated "This is the jumbo pack and it's 25k for one"

At that moment the moi-moi in my mouth began tasting like agidi.

"Bia Nne" I leaned towards my crush "Can you run?"

"Run? why?" She asked in a confused tone

"Just answer, Yes or No?"

"Okay, Yes I can run. What's the problem?"

"Very good. See, when you hear, on your mark.. set.. Go! You will run outside with speed and take left while I take right"

"Nnamdi, i understand what you are saying, running to where?"

"Nne shut up first! When you reach house, you'll understand"

What's your experience?

CarlosTheJackal:
OP started with Lies

ogwuche4u:
How does a date equates premarital sex bayi? I am shocked this is even coming from a lady. He is missing a very important part of his life. He needs to go on a date les he regrets in later time. What makes you think he is serious? Because he doesn't go on a date...lol... The guy is a stunch introvert. He needs help. He is dying in silence.

SultanOfAbia:
Mehnnn one of my top most embarrising date. Say no to drugs

I lived with my classmate in a 3 bedroom house. The guy usually smokes weed once in a while.
I had a date with my new babe that ive been toasting for months,
That day i came back late from lectures, was so hungry and she called that she is waiting for me to pick her up, cuz time is going
I open fridge to drink water then rush to pick her up but as i open fridge i saw chocolate brownie cake wrapped with foil
I knew it was my classmates own
In my mind i said let me just bite half due to hunger then later Replace it for him

Minutes later i dey chill with my babe
All of a sudden she called that her dad is in hospital and they called her to buy drug for him. No wahala i carry her go pharmacy buy the drug then come drop her for the hospital.
Instead of me to wait outside, i say make i do boyfriend duties
Use the oppurtunity and meet her parents for the first time and introduce myself to them. Show dem say i be responsible boyfriend

As i enter i see many family members praying in the hospital bed. So as per courtesy i decided to join them in prayers

That was when i began to feel weird higness creeping in
My head started swelling
I noticed i started slurrping my speech
If they shout AMEN it will he sounding like slow motion sound

I didnt know that what i ate was pschedilc weed brownie.
The highness from that brownie i ate started kicking in full time in the middle of prayers.

It hit me unawares and i tried so much to compot myself and not cast myself.
They started clapping and singing praise song
I tried to clap but my hands were moving like slow motion, so i respect myself and fold my hands and started nodding my head

The girl looked at me and gave me sign that i should clap, she no even know say i don goooo since..
I Put hand for head come squat for ground.
I think that was the final straw
My babe immediately sensed that something is wrong with me
She then stylishly took me outside
That when i vomit for hospital staircase people just dey look me

I imagine her family looking at me like
Nkechi who is this possessed man that you brought here

UyaiIncomparabl:
If you can't spot her, don't bother. 🙄

UyaiIncomparabl:
April 10th, 2017 — a day I shall never forget in a hurry.

While eating my sumptuous rice together with my supposed date, then came the time to devour the chicken. At that time, I could not use cutleries so I devised other means (my hands). This chicken was so juicy and sweet that while eating and dragging it back and forth, it fell off my hand to the ground because I been dey drag bone.

I didn't know if to disappear or pick up the chicken. A whole fine girl like me. My date was just looking at me like a dunce. In his mind, he would have been thinking “werey ni girl yii sha”. That was one of the most embarrassing days of my life. I still cringe anytime I think about it. That day sha, the kind hunger wey been dey sama me ehn. I took no mercy on the chicken. Thankfully, bobo understood and we still laugh it out whenever I bring up the topic.

purples25:
Well, I never said a date equates premarital sex.

EriMma1:
That would be when a nairalander took me out and bought me children sized citrus burst drink and the smallest cup of ice cream.
I was looking at those tiny stuff on the table Ike gosh wetin be this??!!! And the lady behind us was stretching her neck to look at our table. Hm! ( Though he later bought me a bigger thing sha).

Another one was way back in 2004. I went on a blind date with one man. When he showed up, I nearly hid but he already caught me as my phone was ringing so loud while he approached me. As if that was not enough, after ordering our food, he held my hands across the table and started praying so loud that one yuppie guy sitting next to us started giggling. The prayer was not the problem but the way he made it so loud. Chai! Blind date cancel since then.

ashewoboy:
Wow! You are not looking bad. Clear skin.

WorldRichest:
From 2017, are you still dating?

1Dray:
So what's the problem? The prayer?

UyaiIncomparabl:
April 10th, 2017 — a day I shall never forget in a hurry.

While eating my sumptuous rice together with my supposed date, then came the time to devour the chicken. At that time, I could not use cutleries so I devised other means (my hands). This chicken was so juicy and sweet that while eating and dragging it back and forth, it fell off my hand to the ground because I been dey drag bone.

I didn't know if I was to disappear or pick up the chicken. A whole fine girl like me. My date was just looking at me like a dunce. In his mind, he would have been thinking “werey ni girl yii sha”. That was one of the most embarrassing days of my life. I still cringe anytime I think about it. That day sha, the kind hunger wey been dey sama me ehn. I took no mercy on the chicken. Thankfully, bobo understood and we still laugh it out whenever I bring up the topic.

Persephone1:
But it wasn't intentional nah. Why feel bad?

Alonso91:
The day my mobile app network failed me inside Mr Biggs,,,,,
I don dey shake inside before my date later pay with the cash she hold n i later refund her

Adebisi0070:
Omo! this reminds me of a faithful day I had taken my crush out for lunch.

It was a sunday evening and we had gone to this newly opened fast-food joint to chill - Bills on me!

When we got there, she ordered jollof rice, chicken and moi-moi, and so did i. We also had a pack of hollandia yogurt each to step down our meal.

I did a rough calculation of everything in my head and it summed up to about 10k. I had 15k with me so no problem.

So we were busy eating and chatting when I overheard a customer complaining with raised voice. He had just been served his bill and he couldn't hide his anger at the exorbitant cost of his meal.

"10k for a plate of moi-moi? wetin una put inside!!"? He barked

When I heard moi-moi, I turned to his direction.

"This is corr.uption!" He yelled "Ordinary moi-moi 10k!"

When I looked at his table, I realized his moi-moi was even the small size, meanwhile we ordered the jumbo size.

I called one of the waitresses.

"Nne, biko how much is the moi-moi?" I whispered to her ear

"25k sir" She snapped

"No, I mean just the moi-moi, not the total bill" I voiced

"That's what am saying, sir" She reiterated "This is the jumbo pack and it's 25k for one"

At that moment the moi-moi in my mouth began tasting like agidi.

"Bia Nne" I leaned towards my crush "Can you run?"

"Run? why?" She asked in a confused tone

"Just answer, Yes or No?"

"Okay, Yes I can run. What's the problem?"

"Very good. See, when you hear, on your mark.. set.. Go! You will run outside with speed and take left while I take right"

"Nnamdi, i understand what you are saying, running to where?"

"Nne shut up first! When you reach house, you'll understand"

What's your experience?

Adebisi0070:
Omo! this reminds me of a faithful day I had taken my crush out for lunch.

It was a sunday evening and we had gone to this newly opened fast-food joint to chill - Bills on me!

When we got there, she ordered jollof rice, chicken and moi-moi, and so did i. We also had a pack of hollandia yogurt each to step down our meal.

I did a rough calculation of everything in my head and it summed up to about 10k. I had 15k with me so no problem.

So we were busy eating and chatting when I overheard a customer complaining with raised voice. He had just been served his bill and he couldn't hide his anger at the exorbitant cost of his meal.

"10k for a plate of moi-moi? wetin una put inside!!"? He barked

When I heard moi-moi, I turned to his direction.

"This is corr.uption!" He yelled "Ordinary moi-moi 10k!"

When I looked at his table, I realized his moi-moi was even the small size, meanwhile we ordered the jumbo size.

I called one of the waitresses.

"Nne, biko how much is the moi-moi?" I whispered to her ear

"25k sir" She snapped

"No, I mean just the moi-moi, not the total bill" I voiced

"That's what am saying, sir" She reiterated "This is the jumbo pack and it's 25k for one"

At that moment the moi-moi in my mouth began tasting like agidi.

"Bia Nne" I leaned towards my crush "Can you run?"

"Run? why?" She asked in a confused tone

"Just answer, Yes or No?"

"Okay, Yes I can run. What's the problem?"

"Very good. See, when you hear, on your mark.. set.. Go! You will run outside with speed and take left while I take right"

"Nnamdi, i understand what you are saying, running to where?"

"Nne shut up first! When you reach house, you'll understand"

What's your experience?

SultanOfAbia:
Mehnnn one of my top most embarrising date. Say no to drugs

I lived with my classmate in a 3 bedroom house. The guy usually smokes weed once in a while.
I had a date with my new babe that ive been toasting for months,
That day i came back late from lectures, was so hungry and she called that she is waiting for me to pick her up, cuz time is going
I open fridge to drink water then rush to pick her up but as i open fridge i saw chocolate brownie cake wrapped with foil
I knew it was my classmates own
In my mind i said let me just bite half due to hunger then later Replace it for him

Minutes later i dey chill with my babe
All of a sudden she called that her dad is in hospital and they called her to buy drug for him. No wahala i carry her go pharmacy buy the drug then come drop her for the hospital.
Instead of me to wait outside, i say make i do boyfriend duties
Use the oppurtunity and meet her parents for the first time and introduce myself to them. Show dem say i be responsible boyfriend

As i enter i see many family members praying in the hospital bed. So as per courtesy i decided to join them in prayers

That was when i began to feel weird higness creeping in
My head started swelling
I noticed i started slurrping my speech
If they shout AMEN it will he sounding like slow motion sound

I didnt know that what i ate was pschedilc weed brownie.
The highness from that brownie i ate started kicking in full time in the middle of prayers.

It hit me unawares and i tried so much to compot myself and not cast myself.
They started clapping and singing praise song
I tried to clap but my hands were moving like slow motion, so i respect myself and fold my hands and started nodding my head

The girl looked at me and gave me sign that i should clap, she no even know say i don goooo since.. As I put hand for head come squat for ground.
I think that was the final straw
My babe immediately sensed that something is wrong with me
She then stylishly took me outside
That when i vomit for hospital staircase people just dey look me

I imagine her family looking at me like
Nkechi who is this possessed man that you brought here