₦airaland Forum

🔟lessons I learnt in my 10years in marriage🥂

#1. Men crave honor, not just respect. He could get respect from his neighbor, colleagues, even a stranger.

#2. Lower your expectations from the start. Fairytales are fiction and doesn't last longer than a novel or movie length, marriage is a lifetime reality.

#3. You would both hurt yourselves more than you could ever imagine, and your capacities to forgive and love again would be tested. A lot of people don't survive the test.

#4. The likelihood that one spouse would be unfaithful at some point is higher than the statistics... Also It's more likely to be the man. These categories of women would cheat (a) the unrepented slot (b) the unattended or neglected (c) the scorned. The second category are lonely, and the last category just want to get even. Try not to break the trust, it's so difficult to repair.

#5. Children are a blessing from God, but always remember they are the icing and not the cake. They would grow, leave and cleave. Let them be your common interest and love binder, not your escape. May God bless you with your own children 🙏

#6. Be intentional about fanning the flame of your love. It naturally goes out if you don't make the effort to keep it burning.

#7. If you two don't care about each other more than you care about yourselves, you are just flat mates.

#8. Women pls marry men you look up to. Women are drawn to some form of leadership and power. Dear man if you do not possess the one that fascinates the woman you are going for, you will share her eventually.

#9. Man, the only way you can remain the leader in that home is to be the provider. A woman can at best be a contributor, and if she provides it can only be temporary. Hustle my man!

#10. Most matters you take out to outsiders could have been resolved within yourselves. The people you are going out to don't have it any better. Your pastor is not a marriage counselor. Your friends are not the ones you got married to. Your parents have finished their job. Learn to communicate with each other, and resolve your issues.

In summary marriage can be Heaven on earth, or Hell. The way you lay your bed, so you must lie on it. Wish you well 🥂

Chux Nnodim

You couldn't be more apt. 👌

Marriage is way overrated. As time goes on more and more men and women are going to stay away from getting married

Best post I've seen on this forum this morning
Too good!

Marriage is overated and a scam.

Marriage isn't for everybody... and marriage has no special book or manual that guides it.... .the earlier you realize that,the better for you....

My brother, sorry to be honest with you. If you haven't divorce your wife, you didn't learn anything in that marriage.

Women aren't capable of love/marriage. They are manipulators, using love/marriage as a trap. Kindly, get sense and stay away from love/marriage.

If you are married, divorce her immediately. The fact that she hasn't show you pepper/shege now doesn't means she wouldn't show you pepper.

Women are very pretentious in nature. They can pretend for 20, 30 or even 40years. But one thing is certain, that shege they are cooking for you, you must eat it when the time is right.

I want to advise you with all humidity, kindly divorce your wife, no matter how hard it is or how emotional you are. It's for your own good. Later you will understand.

If you aren't married, God is on your side. Never, ever allow any girl or your emotion to deceive you into marriage. If you want children, have baby mama or better still, adopt or use IVF if you can afford it.

Peace!

A word is enough for the wise.

SweetBuns:
Best post I've seen on this forum this morning
Too good!

How are those two buns of yours doing?

how about the meat pie?

As a man, if God gives you a good wife who can manage your home; then God has buttered your bread. The children of jezebels I see around dis days, dey make me over fear o

Most people that will comment here are not even married and struggling managing a relationship yet they will never learn from experienced couples.

Nice points

11. Find something doing, don’t relax to answer Oga wife, do something, bring something to the table

12. I learnt to keep quiet during argument because I know if I talk and he talks back, I’ll feel more hurt…
It’s not every fight I should fight.
later on, I walk up to him and present my case, we resolve.

Marriage isn’t work, it’s commitment jare
Mine is 9 years in marriage

Men crave honor, not just respect. He could get respect from his neighbor, colleagues, even a stranger.

Lol. It is no more respect, now honour.

Before it is was men crave RESPECT, not LOVE.

Soon it would be WORSHIP.

Then same men would complain that women don't marry who they LOVE.

Tallesty1 and his brothers matter done tire me .

pocohantas:
Lol. It is no more respect, now honour.

Goalpost don shift.

Marriage na big biggest scam ..

More fruitful years ahead

Stay off marriage if you are not ready to say "SORRY" even when you are right.

folake4u:
Goalpost don shift.

That was a new one to me. But I am taking notes and updating my OS. Hahaha!

Balablue64:
Marriage is overated and a scam.

Okwu aghuola ibuo na ito

Some people did more than you wrote up there but still got letter of divorce.
Marriage just like Many other things isn’t for everybody.
There’s no manual or self help book because whatever works for me may actually destroy yours.

Balablue64:
Marriage is overated and a scam.

Dey shout "marriage na scam like rabid dog"😂 Instead make you pray make Baba God give you better wife. If u don already marry, nobody send you to marry wetin go choke you. Y u know ask Baba God in the first place?🙄

Men and women are different animals, not meant to live together.

Marriage is a charade, don't fall for it.

This is 60% trash talk.

The problem of many Nigerians is bt living by the OP standard.
My advice to men is, when you're getting married please marry a lady you can control to some large extent if you're willing to also be faithful in deeds.

Don't forgive an unfaithful partner if you've been faithful.

Marriage is give and take, don't give when you're not getting and don't give what you can't afford to loose.

Don't marry a lady from a single mother, if you should do be careful, they have a crazy ideology about life.

You're the provider doesn't mean you should kill yourself. Number 1 important thing in life is food. Once you can feed yourself, your parent and children and other billing are not compulsory but try attend to some

“Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you” (Exodus 20:12).

Na respect your wife owe you no be honour, na her parents get dat one.

Hmmmm

interesting.


The best marriage is not between two romantic people neither is it between two compatible people.


The best marriage is the one between two forgivers.

Sonnobax15:

Marriage isn't for everybody... and marriage has no special book or manual that guides it.... .the earlier you realize that,the better for you....

The way money isn't for everyone and in which it has no special book to guard it.



But I can tell you Marriage has its own rules and if the 2 couples follow the rules strictly, there is 90% chance they will succeed.

Marriage is life

For any marriage to work, what is required is
1. Kindness
2. Both partners have to be deliberate and intentional with their commitment.

All those love fantasies are just fictions.

SweetBuns:
Best post I've seen on this forum this morning
Too good!

Nothing sweet una pass relationship and marriage talk