₦airaland Forum

Nice story... Less abbreviation and for errors before posting

Iphekitan:
Part 25

12 a.m Day 1

I was awake around 5mins past 12, thanks to my
alarm. I was still putting on my shirt when I hear a
knock at the door. I opened up, i knew it was the
primate.

Me : Good morning ma

Primate : Morning, weren't you sleeping before at all.

Me : not really ma .

Primate : OK time for prayers.

Issh like I didn't know before, she led me into the
church, and for like 30 minutes she was sharing the
word from THE WORD, but my mind wasn't really
with her because am not used to being awake by such
a time. I came back to conciousness when I heard,
lets pray, sharply I bowed my head.

Primate : not here mister, come along.

I followed her, she took me to the back of the compound , I noticed we were approaching a river, In my mind I was like, this white garment churches and their attachment to rivers sha. We got there.

Primate : take off your shirt.

I rolled up my trousers, took off my shirt, I am very muscular ,because I don't joke with morning exercises, I noticed the primate's eyes widened when she saw my packs. I ignored and went to join her in the middle of the water.

She brought out two candles, and lighted them , she told me to hold them with my hands wide apart by my sides.

She then brought out a local sponge and a black soap in a white dish.

Me : ma , can I do the washing myself.

Primate : your turn would come, but at this point, it's necessary I do, just keep saying amen.

I bent down and she poured water on my head and started the washing with the sponge and black soap, she was praying along the line, and I kept saying amen.

After 10minutes of back to back washing. She handed me the soap and sponge, and took the still burning two candles from me.

Primate : you can have a complete bath now. When you are done , burn the sponge with this two candles that I would leave by the river bank and meet me inside the church with the ashes.

(She left)

I had a quick bath, did what I was told to do, and later joined her in the church, and gave the ashes to her.

Primates : ok you can go back to sleep now, that would be all for now.


+++++++++++++++++++++++


In the morning I woke up around nine , I guess my body automatically adjusted it self to make up for the hours I was denied of sleep.

I woke up feeling energetic, I did 25 push ups in my room , drank a pure, then retreated to my bed.
I was flipping through my pictures on my pc, when I heard a knock at the door.

Me : come in please.


Faith : brother ife, you want to sleep for the whole day, oga o, this would be the sixth time I would knock your door, thank God you are awake at last.

In my mind I was like, sho what's wrong with this bae, awake or not what's her own. i was yet to reply her, and she kept staring at me like person they just serve jollof rice for party.


Faith : won't you tell me to come in ?

Me : oh come in ( I paved way for her entry)

Faith : Good morning.

Me : morning.

She helped herself to sit on my bed.

Faith : I guess you just wake sef , your eyes are still swollen.

Me : not really, have been awake minutes before now, I was just flexing with my laptop.

Faith : hmmmn ok can I touch your laptop.

Me : you are free.

I noticed she was still staring at me, when I expected her to be facing the screen of the laptop.

Her stared made me realise I was putting on just boxers, mehn it was due to the heat o, I stylish put on a chase dear and my carrot jean. She must have been admiring me body all this while, I hope this bae won't get me into an issh.
I sat on the chair.

Faith : come and join me on the bed now, this your pictures are hillarious, you must be a play boy o, with different kind of girls am seeing here.

I ignored that remark. I wonder what kind off lady would be trespassing a guys room by this time of the day.

Me : sister faith where is the bathroom located please.

Faith : I would take you there when you are ready to take your bath.

Me : am ready now.

I took along my towel and she led the way. We got to the bathroom. and I closed the door in to have my bath, it wasn't up to 3minutes when I heard someone knocking th door of the bathroom.
I rolled on my towel and peeped.
Lo and behold it was sister faith again.

Faith : the primate said I should give you this soap to bath.

Geez it was another black soap. Why is their own soap always black gan sef.

Me : thank you ( I colllected it and closed it the door)

Finished up in the bathroom, and went back to my room, guess what?, I still met sister faith in my room watching movie on my system.

I was just with a towel rolled round my waist. She paused and film and she was staring right into my eye balls.

Faith : I guess I should excuse you , so you can dress.

Me : yeah

(She stood up and left)

Thank God she had manners a little.

Nice one... sister faith hmmmm...

Beta be careful. That girl may be devil's advocate o. Sha kontinu

Mainland:
in side church!!!

no mind him. Temptation be that ooo. Remember what the first lady did to you for Ola's laptop ooo.........lol

@ife,bros abeg finish this tori na..am salivating for the conclusion....kudos tho!

Oga mii... Come finish dis tin sharpsharp.... Its Educative thoooo.... If nah me I no go give ola dat pc oooo

Great storyline op,please can u send me the full story or any where i can download or read dem?

Ollyfad:
uhmmm....... frank comment bro....dis is one of d worst story presentation av had d misfortune of reading and i only took d pains to read tru bcus u gave me a mention and i will tell u y i said dat.
first, d work is totally not edited. u don't type widout editing ur typed work...no one does dat.
second, m avin a hard tym dcidin if its prose or drama.
third, ur use of d pidgin english does not even as much as portray a good grab of d language. bliv dat bcus i spend 90% of my talking tym speaking pidgin....in fact except m angry, i dont seem to be able to communicate in english.
at d beginning of ur work u gave d excuse of being a science student and to me dats no excuse. let me limit dis to nairaland....av read really great stories written by science students. bcus u av made ur passion for writing known by not jst taking d big step of putting pen to paper (sumtin av neva done) and going fuda to update regularly, i wuld give u dis piece of advise..... u cant b a writer if u are not a reader. u can only write after u must av read and even done sum research on wat u want to write and how u want to ryt. i wuld suggest sum authors wit peculiar rytin style on nairaland especially those dat ryt from d first person point of view. read authors lyk larrysun, princesa, kayemjay, frank317, repogirl, mazi omenuko and most especially, d author of african nerd....redmosquito. he also wrote in pidgin and english and he is a trained doctor in case u r wondering how he culd b so gud. u can also read flow stories too especially ibo boy wey like yoruba. it will really hlp u in improving ur writing skill i.e if u r serious abt writing. i hope ur next update will be beta constructed and articulate bcus i cwiuzly bliv ryt now, all u r doing is murdering wat suld av been a really great and adventurous story wit bad presentation.
N.B: i hope u will take dis criticism as fair enof and improve on ur writing skill for ur own gud, ur story's gud and d gud of ur audience. especially if u want literature lovers and not story by d moonlight lovers to take u cwiuzly. keep up d courage bro.....every wole soyinka or chinua achebe have a beginning story to tell

motherfucker hw many stories u don write..critic

Ollyfad:
uhmmm....... frank comment bro....dis is one of d worst story presentation av had d misfortune of reading and i only took d pains to read tru bcus u gave me a mention and i will tell u y i said dat.
first, d work is totally not edited. u don't type widout editing ur typed work...no one does dat.
second, m avin a hard tym dcidin if its prose or drama.
third, ur use of d pidgin english does not even as much as portray a good grab of d language. bliv dat bcus i spend 90% of my talking tym speaking pidgin....in fact except m angry, i dont seem to be able to communicate in english.
at d beginning of ur work u gave d excuse of being a science student and to me dats no excuse. let me limit dis to nairaland....av read really great stories written by science students. bcus u av made ur passion for writing known by not jst taking d big step of putting pen to paper (sumtin av neva done) and going fuda to update regularly, i wuld give u dis piece of advise..... u cant b a writer if u are not a reader. u can only write after u must av read and even done sum research on wat u want to write and how u want to ryt. i wuld suggest sum authors wit peculiar rytin style on nairaland especially those dat ryt from d first person point of view. read authors lyk larrysun, princesa, kayemjay, frank317, repogirl, mazi omenuko and most especially, d author of african nerd....redmosquito. he also wrote in pidgin and english and he is a trained doctor in case u r wondering how he culd b so gud. u can also read flow stories too especially ibo boy wey like yoruba. it will really hlp u in improving ur writing skill i.e if u r serious abt writing. i hope ur next update will be beta constructed and articulate bcus i cwiuzly bliv ryt now, all u r doing is murdering wat suld av been a really great and adventurous story wit bad presentation.
N.B: i hope u will take dis criticism as fair enof and improve on ur writing skill for ur own gud, ur story's gud and d gud of ur audience. especially if u want literature lovers and not story by d moonlight lovers to take u cwiuzly. keep up d courage bro.....every wole soyinka or chinua achebe have a beginning story to tell

you comment make sense; but you are ugly sha

Iphekitan:
Nairaland banned me again.

Back to my real account, would drop the next part by 9a.m, thanks for following so far.

Why are they banning you?

U must bleep DAT sister Faith.....if u no chop sister faith wats d need reading reading Dis..

No bleep faith ooo...cuz if you bleep her,you are finished...

Emmm,at this point in time we wont contiue with the story cox a company has bought this as it script so wash out for the concluding part on home video....
Thank
yours faithfully
okurin mejo ati abo
a.k.a. Oko lolosho(faith and other)
yahoo boy with backup(alfa sule and olorun cele)
but be careful efcc fit dey read your story tooo

Nice. Next chapter

Oyin93:
kwontinue

geez you are fuckin.g beautiful. Damn! Slim girls tho

holajeedayy:
Emmm,at this point in time we wont contiue with the story cox a company has bought this as it script so wash out for the concluding part on home video....
Thank
yours faithfully
okurin mejo ati abo
a.k.a. Oko lolosho(faith and other)
yahoo boy with backup(alfa sule and olorun cele)
but be careful efcc fit dey read your story tooo

Note : This is a pure work of fiction

Iphekitan:
Note : This is a pure work of fiction

we dy wait bro

Am enjoying the story @mainland kindly the rest asap.... I will always check back..

Hollawaley:
geez you are fuckin.g beautiful. Damn! Slim girls tho

thanks

Hollawaley:
geez you are fuckin.g beautiful. Damn! Slim girls tho

thanks,but can u not use d F word pls?

gabbidonb:
you comment make sense; but you are ugly sha

True true

hummm

Fiction will always be Fiction

Mainland abeg just try update, can't wait to read the concluding part. Very interesting story

I dey gbadun dis story dieeee.

Aunty "swious" u fall my hand big time o
Naso them dey give advice
Waka pass jor!

Nice piece so long a letter but intriguing and suspenseful.
Just like Nigerian movies I know sister Faith is set to play some crucial role shortly
Keep em coming bruv

Nairaland ask @ ife. To continue the conversation why is her stopping the story he should finish it now. Why is he putting us into suspense? We don't like it he should finish it now, @ife you most not start what you we not finishe oooooooo we are waiting.

hadura29:
Nice one... sister faith hmmmm...

may your suffering be as long as the post you quoted. Must you quote the whole story? Newbie alert!

Waiting for the next update tho

Gofwane:
may your suffering be as long as the post you quoted. Must you quote the whole story? Newbie alert!

guy you harsh oo

nice write up bro am really enjoying this......update asap