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Stats: 2,191,092 members, 4,777,447 topics. Date: Saturday, 23 February 2019 at 10:33 AM
|[story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 5:39pm On Mar 27, 2016|
I just have the passion for writing but I know that I'm not that good. Who cares anyway? Besides I'm not a literature student that needs to perfect his/her writing skills: not that we (science students) don't write report to perfection. We only do it well when the need arises. So if you are thinking of bashing or correcting my grammatical blunder...... Hmnnnnnn ; like I have rightly said "who cares anyway?". The choice is yours. Thanks Guys!
Let us make it more formal (Smiling).
PLEASE NOTE: This story was in no way written to promote fraudulent activities or a lifestyle of vanity, rather it was inspired by the urge to entertain and enlighten the youths and society at large on the perils of the get-rich-quick syndrome and to promote a reading culture.
DISCLAIMER: All characters contained in this story are totally fictional.
All right reserved
Any part of this story could be rebrocasted any where or shared anywhere as long as reference is made to the writer.
My name is iphekitan meaning endless love. This is my first story/write up; Appreciation is needed in terms of likes and comments.
Thanks for your time. Smiling face!
I was privillege to attend one of the best secondary school’s in Ibadan then. Was a boys only school tho. But i was happy I attended such a school. I was 17 years old then when I started having this experience.
Every guy of my age would be chasing admission into an higher institution or learning a trade but that's not the case for me. I was just too obsessed with E - dating
Sit back and Read every part of this story carefully and i bet you would enjoy it.
Whatsapp >> 09034368823
Ss3 third Term >> V. S Things
It was at that period of our v.s that girls from other schools do attend our schools v.s . I was a very popular guy On the various social app then, 2go and whatsapp, among my peeps. We created various group chat, where we connect with girls from other school. Since I was good with words, girls do add me privately to chat with me, they are all fond of me mehn, they always try to let us meet up but i always turn them down, tho. I wasn't the shy type but i just don't fancy meeting this girls physically, I have less than 16 gf's Online that have never set my eyes on physically. Those girls were caring mehn, they do send me Recharge cards ocassionally then, without me even asking them to.
Thanks to camera 360 am very photogenic, so my display pix do the asking out, I just chat with a girl for 2days and the third day I would. Have gotten a yes, I even do hear rumour that those girls do fight themselves over me. A guy they have never met.
On the D-day of our V.s. It's normal for girls and guys from other schools to visit. Prior to that day have been writing status about the v.s on my status. Unknowingly to me I was given them an invite.
Few minutes to the end of the programme I just excused myself to leave the boring program.
Stepping out I swear girls and guys from other schools hanging around in groups sha.
I just saw a classmate of mine talking to some set of girls I approached the guy,
Me : guy how far now?
My frnd : I dey oh
1st girl : Hey guy am shola by name, are u not iphekitan.
Me : Yeah I am, how may I help you please?
Five of the girls chorused "iphekitan! "
1st girl : am pweedyshally21 on 2go
2nd girl : am mreb16
3rd girl : am goldengirl2500
They just kept beating inteoducing themselves
I was like Jesus I don enter am today. I just said nice meeting you girls and was about turning back when I saw lyk 6 girls approaching, they were like "iphekitan" another was like "hifemi" [meaning my love], I was lyk chai I don enter am today. They sha boxed me up in their midst. Throwing questions at me
Girl one : guy you are really cute as you look on your dp
Girl two: am bimpe your darling
Girl three : What! Bimpe ke! Iphe itz me titi your love.
In my mind I was like I don enter one chance.
My other friends just came around. Talking to the girls one by one I was like tank God. Some were even making jest of me, they were like at last we met you.
We sha took pictures with each other and eventually I settled with one of the girls', taiwo by name, she was tall thou not taller than I am,nice hips, thick girl, small waist, she was just the one u selected to go to the after party with me.
Leme not bore you with the details
Thats just how I knew I have a talent in chatting with girls Online, lol I do call it coding girls Online thou.
The taiwo of a girl followed me home on that fateful day, we smooched, kiss but not more than that because I never jah much then.
To be continued
27 Likes 4 Shares
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 5:45pm On Mar 27, 2016|
Few days at home after graduating from the secondary school, I was starting to get bored at home. Therefore, my one and only companion was my phone.
I do chat day and night, 24/7 on my phone until that couldn't satisfy my boredom, because asking a girl out Online became my easiest hobby.
So n a fateful day I decided to switch my tactics.
Prior to the switching, I do have problem with data, I wasn't getting enough doe for my monthly sub, so I switched tactics by created a female 2go account. I checked in to Facebook and saw one portharcourt girl profie, stolesome couple of pix of hers, do use them as my display picture for that account. I added most of my old school mates to the account. I used the username "maryjane".
All my life I thought asking a girl out was easy but sincerely making a guy ask you out is easier.
I just chat with them for 2 hours, and the next thing you notice is them chatting nicely, caringly, chai guys mehn, greater mumu, during those duration, i'd get up to #3000 Naira Worth Of Recharge card from those guys, all I took was a yes.
On a fateful day I was in the saloon normal normal to have my hair cut, it wasn't my turn yet so I sat on one of the chairs pressing my phone, I just saw some older guys typing hard on their laptops like a person preparing a project report, I sha looked away until the phone of one one them ringed and guess what, the guy changed voice ni sharply on picking up the call, I had no choice but to take a look at them again, the guy faked his voice to that of a girlish type, and he was speaking fast English, I was like. Sho in this place na
To be continued
31 Likes 4 Shares
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 5:57pm On Mar 27, 2016|
2 Likes 5 Shares
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:10pm On Mar 27, 2016|
God. Are you the one on your dp?
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:12pm On Mar 27, 2016|
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:14pm On Mar 27, 2016|
Oyin93:You are too slim like you don't eat at all!
8 Likes 2 Shares
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:18pm On Mar 27, 2016|
Sugarhugs:lol,I hear that a lot...say something else pls!
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:23pm On Mar 27, 2016|
Try to add up weight for your own sake, you don't look good at all.
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:24pm On Mar 27, 2016|
Sugarhugs:n u think u are in d right position to tell me that?
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:25pm On Mar 27, 2016|
Take it or leave it.
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:27pm On Mar 27, 2016|
Sugarhugs:why not mind ur business n stop criticising a fellow human like u...u privileged to be on the meaty side does not mean u av the right to wash mouth on my BODY o,now swerve make I c road
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:29pm On Mar 27, 2016|
Sugarhugs:this is how people cause problems into their life o,u feel u cannot just mind Ur business n leave her alone,na Ur body?
12 Likes 1 Share
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:30pm On Mar 27, 2016|
The guy was now trying to explain a stuff to the white man on the other line, and is voice was changing somehow, so he told the white man to hold on that he had to visit the larvatory, he put the call on hold and was like, "chai my voice is having problem who can help me with this maga? " , he was directing that at his friends, but not could because there voice were too tough to fake it to that of a girl.
Have been taking a peep at them from the start of the whole thing, as i look at them one last time, the eyes of the bro and i just clashed, he just signaled at me to come, I didn't hesitate, he explained that he needs my help to talk to his uncle, I was smiling, I was like, why his he framing tge thing up, i understand, and i heard all you have been saying since bro, the bro said, "smart nigga", he told me what to tell the white maga on the next line, and sincerely my voice is very girlish on the phone, so I didn't have to fake it, he unhold the call ans passed the phone to me.
Me : hi dear, I'm sorry for holding you for that long
White maga: No problem I understand you.
Me : so dear, what about the iphone you promised to send
White maga : Am still working on it girl, I have plans to send other things along that to you. And don’t be permissive.
Me: am sorry dear, it's just that have been looking forward to having that phone for a while, you such a darling, never knew you had other plans.
As the conversation was going on and on, everyone was looking at me mehn, coz I was just flowing with the white maga, they don't know am experienced some how, after about 5mins conversation the white maga and i ended the conversation.
And he promised to send the stuffs the following day.
The bro who gave the phone was the first to comment.
Bro : champ you be bastard, gimme five, have been tasking these maga for two weeks and he never yield, and you just control am in few minutes. O boy I hail o
I just sat there blushing the bro gave me 5k that day mehn and we exchange numbers, other friends of his also collected my number.
I had my hair cut sharply and left there for home smiling, lol that how my YY life was kicking off
To be continued
22 Likes 2 Shares
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:31pm On Mar 27, 2016|
Oyin93:n stop derailing the thread,aproko
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:56pm On Mar 27, 2016|
Everyone should sit down to read this. You'd learn a thing or two how guys on nairaland use female monikers to deceive unsuspecting males.
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 8:15pm On Mar 27, 2016|
The next day, the bro whose name I later got to knowas bro ola, messaged me on whatsapp, he thanked me for yesterday, he said, he would like me to visit him in the evening but i insisted it should be the next day.
Another bro, who was part of his friends who I gave my number to the day before, called me and introduced himself as bro A.y, he asked to know more about myself , i told him I passed put of secondary school recently and that am just flexing at home , I told him of my computer abilities also, that I can edit, type, etc, ...
When he heard the word "edit", he was like you can edit pictures and document, I answered yes.
He was also like he would like to see me the next day,
I said no qualms .
He gave me his address that i should try to come to his area tge next day, He even sent me 1k Worth Of recharge that day when I told him I don't have a call Card to inform him when am coming.
Later in the day I was just smiling to myself, listening to karishika by Falz, I kept repeating the line "money and the fame coming quicker".
I was like now my smart work is begining to pay.
I could edit pictures not because I learned it but because I was restless, it was what i do just for Fun on my elder brother’s laptop, is now whats connecting me.
The next day, I had my bath, dressed casual, popped in to my female 2go account to check latest mugu, I saw like 6 Friend requests, all males, I chatted with them wella..
One of the maga's that has been sending me recharge cards every now and them, pressured me that morning for my number, which I don't wanna give out to any of them, because I knw they might check me up on whatsapp and see am a guy.
So after much persuassion I gave him my digits, he was like he would call me asap, since it was early momo, my voice was still baritone, so I changed my phone voice settings to female, since he was a small boy he can't detect it was a programmed voice, he called me we spoke for like 2 minutes, because I Love keeping conversations with those mugu very short, so as not to raise any doubt.
We continued our disscussion Online , he was now like, he wants to meet me physically.
he stays in Lagos, i told him my family has relocated to Ib.
He then proposed that I should visit him,
In my mind I was like, lol oya kip falling,
I told him I can only visit him if he could send me tfare to and fro, he was like that's not a problem,
[me Wey love money die] I just told him 8k oh, he asked for my bank account, I told him I don't have one but i could get him an account to send it to. Few minutes later I forwarded my bank account details to him, thanks to mobile banking, he did transfer, when I saw the 8k alert, I just msg him " tnkz u such a darling, ttyl"
Then I prepared to step out to visit bro A.y and bro ola
To be continued
17 Likes 1 Share
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Missmossy(f): 8:57pm On Mar 27, 2016|
Interesting,keep it coming
5 Likes 2 Shares
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 11:13pm On Mar 27, 2016|
I decided I would goto bro ola's domot first because it was in the street next to mine, I gave him a call before leaving home.
Got to his domot around 11 a.m, mehn his House was dope, he lived in a storey building, I met the Security man at the gate, he gave me free access in, its like his boss had told him I was coming, i went in and i met some other guys playing p.s 2, in the living room .
One of them told me to have my sit, that his going to be with me in a jiffy.
I was just relaxing my head under the cool AC, and was almost dosing out of been too comfortable, when I heard my name, looked up and saw the bros. Immediately he came around, the other guys playing game just clear.
He asked if i'd love to take anything which I declined, he thanked me for the other day again. Then he was like, "ife, I av a businesss proposal for you oh, since you are always around, i'd like you to br spending your day flexing here assisting me with some stuffs"
I looked at him and smiled and said,
"bro, t depends oh, I no fit dey spend my day here, when you need me you fit holla me, i go they show up anytime, as long as money is involved"
Bro ola : OK the thing is you would be helping speak with my Clients and i would be giving you figo per day
[in my mind I was like see me see trouble this bros stingy oh figure ke]
Me : bros, make am 1k na
Bro ola : ah no b ordinary phone call conversation I need your help for.
Me: bros I sabi how to use computer wella o, I can edit pictures and documents perfectly o
Bro ola : you sure?
Me : 100% bro
Bro ola : OK let me give you a test
He went in and came back with his laptop
Bro ola : oya I want you to place the passport photograph on this driver's liscense and change the name.
I collected the tge system sharply,
Went to google, downloaded adobe photoshop, and finished edited tge stuff within fifteen minutes.
Me: bros come check
Bro ola : yaaga, this what I want exactly. Nice one you make sense boy, OK no qualms 1k per day.
I later helped him with some Calls with his white magas, when I was. taking my leave, he handed mean 1k, and i left there around 2pm.
Sharply I called bro A.y
To be continued
10 Likes 4 Shares
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Remyboyhefty(m): 11:35pm On Mar 27, 2016|
to all ma g boys out dere keep hustling ooo,efcc go soon drink kunu fr una head
17 Likes 1 Share
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Remyboyhefty(m): 11:47pm On Mar 27, 2016|
Oya kwatinue na
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by hfinest1(m): 12:19am On Mar 28, 2016|
Hurklan eniqurl dalyjay pinkycute Ritababe cherrybrown evathyst tunery004 yinks89 liljboy call others
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by YINKS89(m): 6:57am On Mar 28, 2016|
I don show..... Oya knack mi more ritababe darling ur sit is reserved wif mi.
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Eniqurl(f): 7:09am On Mar 28, 2016|
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by pinkycute(f): 7:52am On Mar 28, 2016|
Am here too.... Thanks
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by cherrybrown(f): 8:59am On Mar 28, 2016|
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Hurklan(m): 9:58am On Mar 28, 2016|
Thanks hfinest1... Oga G boy kwontinue..
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 5:28pm On Mar 28, 2016|
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by tunery004(m): 5:37pm On Mar 28, 2016|
Present fire on
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:00pm On Mar 28, 2016|
The story is fictional. WTF! Why didn't I see that since?! *Unfollowing* Good story so far though.
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 6:30pm On Mar 28, 2016|
Got to bro A.y's crib around 2pm, he was living in a bungalow.
I got to his door and knocked, he came out sweating like person wey just finish playing match, I was now hearing a feminine voice underneath, he was like I should come inside, he then led me to another room, passing through I saw two girls at the living room half Unclad, in my mind I was like, "chai see wetin this bro dey enjoy".
He led me to his system,he showed me the picture of a girl holding a plate of rice, sitting in a restaurant , he said, "ife I need you to change the background of this picture and and change her carrying that food to her carrying a paper, with the inscription I Love gorgio".
I replied no problem, I told him I would need a data connection, he gave me his modem, and said he would be back in a jiffy, i guess he wanted to go and finish his business with his olosho's, so I set to work.
Firstly I went to download adobe photoshop, then search for nice bedroom pix online, downloaded it also, then I launched my photoshop, straight I traced out the girl, went ahead and paste her on the pix with the bedroom with her sitting on the bed, I then sketched out drawing of an A4 Paper, and placed it over the food, it fitted perfectly mehn. I was like oti set. Then i wrote the words 'I Love gorgio' on it with blue color and hand writing font. That it looked perfect like it was the girl that wrote it with pen.
Since the bro was yet to come around, I just switched to videos, I just saw the movie Teen wolf season 1 and 2, I quickly send it to my phone . And i continue watching it on his system.
Few minutes later, I heard the main door closed, I guess the olosho's yaff clear, he then came to were I was, I showed him the stuff I edited, he said, "damn, this is what I want exactly, guy we go do alot together o".
Me : [smiling] no problem bro
He took over the system, login straight to his binu plus and sent the stuff to his maye. It's like the guy responded wella, he went out and came back with two bottles of trophy, we sha shayo at that moment.
Later we now started this discussion
Bro A.y : you see ife, if you roll with me, i will show you how to make your own money o
Me : I wanna be rich also bro, i'd like to learn how to make my own doe
Bro A.y : I would show you the way, day by day as long as you Keep working for me, i would be giving you some changes by the side, but you have to be very calm o and careful.
Me : careful as how bro?
Bro ola : you see, this thing we are into is illegal, and so if eke catch una, na OYO you dey oh
Me wey be learner
Me : wetin be ake bayi
Bro A.y : ahah u no sabi anything sha, na police we dey call eke, coded tins now
Me: OK bro I dey grab
We sha kept conversing till around 5pm when I Left his place with another 1k.
With my earpiece in my ears, I just bounced home.
To be continued
9 Likes 1 Share
|Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Hurklan(m): 7:20pm On Mar 28, 2016|
And u think say, na update u drop abi...
5 Likes 3 Shares
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