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[story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy - Literature (2) - Nairaland

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Confessions Of A FUNAAB Yahoo Yahoo Boy; The Tales Of Gbadebo / S€X Story : My Lovely Houseboy Episode 1 To 10 / My Life As A Yahoo Boy By Iphekitan/mainland (review) (2) (3) (4)

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Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by debsonpoint(m): 8:17pm On Mar 28, 2016
next pld bro
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 8:55pm On Mar 28, 2016
yes. i dan come. . . OP. . . oya, carry go. waiter! waiter! OP u no employ waiter bah? stingy guy, bring one bottle of trophy for me jare.


Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 9:41am On Mar 29, 2016
Part 7

On a Sunday evening like that, I was sitting down outside my house, feeling the evening breeze. My phone just beep, I saw an sms from bro ola, telling me he was a viewing centre in my area. I didn't waste time, I dressed so as to block him there.

On getting there I sighted his babyboy outside, I was like wetin this bros they find here, he fi watch any match comfortably for his house na.

I entered saw some guys arguing about a football match, so I guessed there was no match today niyen, at another corner, I sighted some guys writing somethings down on Paper like person whey wan write waec exam, my guess was that they were forecasting, I then saw some guys by a table they were paying for Naira bet and lucky ball, I just shaked my head, jobless people.

I then saw bro ola sitting on bench, busy with is laptop,

Me : bros I don show o

Bro ola : boy how far now?

Me : bros I gentle oh, wetin bring una come here

Bro ola : oh boy, na eke just they follow my movements jae, they Don burst me twice for my house this week, thank God, they no find anything incriminating on me then, and my guess his they are still watching me. Am on Heat boy, so I wanna go low key for done couple of days.

Me : OK bros, so that's why you con hang out for here, but here sef no safe na, informants plenty for here, they fi come burst you for here o

Bro ola : geez from fire to frypan

Me : No worry bros, you fit they use my place anytime. And like that I fi learn those stuffs you promised to teach me

Bro ola : that's why I say make you con block me here, hotel sef no safe for me, i get one parol I dey process right now, and i no fit delay so na you go help me finish am.

Me : but bros I no sabi how you they do these things yet no worries, I go dey yarn you how you go they do the thing today, I knw you get brain and you sabi chat wella.

Me : OK bros no lele

Bro ola. : oya take this system along, I go they follow you from the back from afar, I dnt want make them link us up.

I just dey waka go home and bro ola dey trail me small small for back.

Lot of things were going on in my mind, I was like if this yahoo thing dey illegal as they say it is, why should I put myself at risk. Well sha money must be made, na that bros lifestyle dey attract police, I go dey do my own codedly by the time I sabi am wella finish.

To be continued

15 Likes 3 Shares

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 10:23am On Mar 29, 2016
Read part 8 here

1 Like 2 Shares

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 11:01am On Mar 29, 2016
hehe. lerus go

1 Like

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Dalyjay(m): 11:09am On Mar 29, 2016

Hurklan eniqurl dalyjay pinkycute Ritababe cherrybrown evathyst tunery004 yinks89 liljboy call others
. Thanks man
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by TzIphekitan(m): 3:31pm On Mar 29, 2016
I take over

Story continues.....

Part. 9

That particular parol bro ola assigned to me was an easy task, I finished it overnight and the client paid him off the next day.

Of all the different types of yahoo scams that existed I still prefered "dating"
I don’t fancy the ones involving buying and selling scams, maybe because I don’t have that OT at that moment.

Bro A.y do call me from time to time and i do help him with his editing stuff, until I failed to start turning up for hia calls, because I was starting to make little changes myself. Since bro ola never come back for his system.

I visited bro A.y on day, and revealed what have been doing to him so I can learn more from him, now that have had and idea about the whole thing. When I told him he said, " you should have told me earlier you too Don ja, no wonder you no dey show up anytime I call you again, smart guy, leme sha show you one or two things that might help".

He gave me different dating formats, tho I was already creating format then myself. But he was the one whole introduced me to the military format. He also taught he how to fake skype call.

I learned many things from that bro but yet am not making cumbersum doe. So I was like Maybe because I don't have my system yet. I just gathered the changes with me and bought one fairly used system, but. Still no much money turning up. I have no friends then. Because I do my things codedly in my area.

I would sometimes have sleepless night due to over night chatting with the help of nescafe. Chai when I was writing my waec a year ago self I wasn't as serious as this when6it comes to night reading.

Things took a new turn when I met this guy called bosun. It was one a friday evening like that, I just say make I ge small for paramount club. As i entered the club, I didn't greet anyone u just went straight to the Bar man and ordered for the winners drink #trophy.

It was obvious with my facial expression I was having problems. I was on my 7th bottle when someone tapped me. Me Wey my eyes don leri, I didn't respond. Then I felt a second tap on my shoulder, and looked at the person and it was a lady, I just hissed, "abeg leme, I no get money to carry olosho tonight"
She con talk say "elo bobo, mister Ben dey call you". I still didn't respond. As she was leaving me I decided to take a look at her behind, then I saw her walking towards a guy amidst four girls on a Vip sit.

To be continued

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Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by TzIphekitan(m): 3:34pm On Mar 29, 2016
, OloriAbefe
, Marcela04, drexel39
, Thobilobah, icym241
, edobor108
, kaysolo726, SimpleBea
, bekuechukwu, Willhill, saraphina
, fattyshaams
, Asco9ty5, TzIphekitan, TheNathan
Slendercutie, mubarakyoung, TiffanyJ
, cutediva87, ekydel09 Abbeyunique2

Report here


Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by TzIphekitan(m): 4:38pm On Mar 29, 2016
Part 10

And no be ordinary person fit sit for vip in a court like paramount, I just noticed the guy amidst them was beckoning on me with his hands.
I decided to approach him because his face looked familiar.

Me : Hey! You see me ri ?

Bosun benson : Bobo wetin do you?, you know sabi person again?

I just took a cursory look at him, then I recognized him.

Me : Bosun! Mad boy!
Na you con siddon for here like king kong. How far now?

B.B : GUY I dey oh, please give me a Minute [He turned to his girls] oya baby's, make una clear for now.

1st olosho : wetin na?
2nd olosho : shey na because of this guy you wan blow up our enjoyment.

B.B : ladies no vex, we go dey do that next time.

Na do they left, con remain I and bosun benson

B.B : ife sit down

Me : [sat down] bosun bosun bosun

B.B : alaye why you they call me repeatedly

Me : Bosun na you oh

B.B : oh boy make you leave that one jae, how you doing?

Me : lowkey oh bobo

Letme brief you about bosun
Bosun was an old classmate of mine in secondary school, he left out school then in ss2 third term, he was the ladies guy, because he was very socially inclined than the rest of us.

Bosun and i spoke for several minutes before he said he was leaving, we sha exchange contacts and he told me to call him the next day.

I got home around 11p.m, mucee and pman Don sleep. And the gate was locked, I just climbed the fence enter the compound, and went to my younger brothers window. He was still awake because he was watching film. He opened the door for me, Naso me sef enter my room, jumped for bed then sign out.

To be continued

7 Likes 2 Shares

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Ndukings92(m): 4:50pm On Mar 29, 2016
I sight u my nigga,keep it coming

2 Likes 3 Shares

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by mztubsy(f): 4:58pm On Mar 29, 2016
Nice one!

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by pinkycute(f): 5:16pm On Mar 29, 2016
Am still following cheesy

Nice write up @Op


Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Abbeyunique2(m): 5:53pm On Mar 29, 2016
Following with keen interest

1 Like

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by TzIphekitan(m): 7:25pm On Mar 29, 2016
Part 11

Waking up the very next day, I did with one powerful headache, but ain't gonna let that get in the way of my hustle, I picked up my phone, checked for notifications and saw none. I then switched on my laptop and was hustling on it till around 2pm.

I then called bosun , his number wasn't going through, in mind I was like, "shey these boy mad ni, I beg am to gimme number before ni mtxhew ". I then went to take my bath in getting back I saw two missed Calls. Guess who. Dhur not bosun. It was bro ola, I flashed him and he called back.

Bro ola : IFE how far?

Me : not too far bro, its been a while oh.

Bro ola : omo I don port go abeokuta for my gf side, make everything cool down

Me : nice decision bro, but how about your maye? How you dey contact them? Since your lappy dey here.

Bro ola : am with my gf now, so na her lappy I dey use hustle here

Me : OK bro

He sha gave me some Tips about the formats he got over there and some sites too. I was still trying to visit the sites when another call came in. This time it was bosun.

B.B : guy how far? , where you at?

Me : lowkey for my papa house oh

B.B : so what have you been engaged in all this while.
Me : I just they hustle pending admission oh
B.B : What work are you now doing

Me : nothing jae, just there

B.B : OK you fit come blocking me for that paramount side, make we flex more and talk better.

Me : nO problem, would be there in the next 1 hour. Sha bring money along cos I wan ge like nine bottles.

B.B : No lele jae mad guy, that one na small thing, catch you later then.

Naso the call end, I quickly rounded things for binu plus, got dressed and headed for paramount.

To be continued

The next part might be updated late [2moro tins] please bear with me, but it would be updated. In bulk when I am back.

12 Likes 1 Share

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Ndukings92(m): 8:07pm On Mar 29, 2016
pls no dulling my man
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by liljboy(m): 9:00am On Mar 30, 2016
Am following smiley
boo boo, sweetest, nkem, nwanyi oma.... where have you been?
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by TheNathan(m): 10:06am On Mar 30, 2016
smileyalready interested ........#following *Tziphekitan*anything for me
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Ndukings92(m): 9:19pm On Mar 30, 2016
tomorrow don de finish o
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Gabriel6(m): 12:00am On Mar 31, 2016

1 Like

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Hardmed: 3:23pm On Mar 31, 2016
Very interesting.............. continue bro
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by pinkycute(f): 7:33pm On Mar 31, 2016
Let me leave my signature here......**** cheesy

At last am here! Nice story @Op

1 Like 1 Share

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by TzIphekitan(m): 10:48am On Apr 01, 2016
Part 12

Got to paramount around 3pm, the baga of a boy never arrive there yet sef. I ordered for a trophy, and was just chatting on whatsapp. I was chatting with this new girl, that is somehow unlocking my heart, me Wey be say I neva loved any girl for real, I was now somehow attracted to this girl. She's a church member of mine sha but we met on facebook.

I was still giving her the usual format, she Don dey fall already sef, but i just like this particular girl, so I decided not to ask her out yet, I.e I put her for reserve.

So she was the one I was just chatting with. Bosun later came around 30mins after.

B.B : guy, you didn't telme you Don land here

Me : you dey craze

B.B : leave trash for Lawma, you dey fresh o

Me : na ur papa dey fresh

B.B : lol, Let's go to my place jae, my spirit no dey here today.

Me : your place, See mouth, you Don build house.

B.B : lol ife see your life, I never build house , but i don buy house.

Me: seriously you own a house?

B.B : Yeah now, not a big deal

Me : wait, where do you stay?

B.B : GRA, around that Alalubosa Estate.

Me : oh boy na you oh

B.B : na you sabi, Let's waka jae.

We went outside, I was thinking we should call a car, omo na end of disscussion i meet for outside oh.
Na so bosun enter.

B.B : oh boy enter now, why you looking life that

Me : chai bosun you don blow.
So na ur ride be this

B.B : [smiling] This one of my rides

I just sat in, we rode to his place. On the way so many things were just going through my mind, I was like, how come this guy get all this stuffs.
I must surely find out, me sef wan drive rangey.

The car stopped, bosun came out and said, "guy this were I dey lay my head oh". My mouth were opened mehn. I was like woaw, this not a house, this is a mansion.

Me : na only you they live here?

B.B : just me and my home boy.

Me : OK

We went him, mehn the interior was madantin. I just code myself, make I no appear like a learner.

Then I was like, "bosun where is your home boy?"

Guessed who came out, it was krissh another exclassmate of mine, we were really closed then mehn. He joined us in ss3 then, so bosun and him never met in school. I was suprised mehn.

Me : krissh!

Krissh : fertilizer! [my nick name in school then], dead or alive?

Me : oh boy see as you they fresh, bosun you guys Don turn boss oh

B.B : you guys even know each other?

We sha disscused, gist, drank, and i left there around 9pm, telling them I would be in there place very early the next day. Thou, to be sincere I didn't feel like leaving that premises mehn. Just felt If I didn't go home pman go dey para. Was happy to saw krissh once again thou.

Let tell you a little about krissh, like I said early he joined our school then in ss3 1st term, he was very social too, he always left school before closing hours to meet girls, that guy na confirm cassanova. I pray he never change sef so he could introduce me to girls hunting again.

To be continued

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Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by TzIphekitan(m): 10:50am On Apr 01, 2016
Part 13

I woke up around 6a.m the next day,had a quick bath, Born to hustle, get rich or die trying. Switch on my system, Getting straight to business. Loading meebo, log in daddyhunt, google language, launching notepad… Yahoo Boy mode activated.

Since it's been a while, have logged in, My inbox was overflowing with mails and IM alerts. Mails from: Congressman, Mrs. Welligton, Jamal, Modressa, Rohas, all wondering whatsup. My head is aching badly, probably due to yesterday fun.

I did parol till around 12pm, I then decided to leave tge house, I planned on visiting those mad friends I just reconnect with.

I just postponed that again, just wanna make this money, continued on my lappy, au voir.com…. AdultfriendFinder logged in. Congressman already online. He has been stalling on sending me money… I sent him some nude picture (I honestly don’t know the guy in the photo). I know he liked what he saw, becaused he promised me heaven and earth again.

Later past two that afternoon I got a call from an unknown number.

Me : Hello tz iphekitan, who am I speaking with?

Caller : lol so you fit speak english fluently like this. [male voice]

Me : who the Bleep his this?

Caller : your father, it I, kvng krissh

Me : [burtsed into laughter] mad guy, king of which kingdom.

Krissh : Bleep you, am a king in a boys body

Me: do you discover tribal mark for my face, alaye leave trash for Lawma.

Krissh : you said you were coming today and you are yet to show up.

Me : No vex jae. Money must be made, just settling some things here.
Almost through here sha, would be with you in a jiffy.

Krissh : OK no lele, sha Buy hollandia yohgurt on your way here.

Me : holland what? Alaye ko Park well jae

That's how the conversation ended, when I was through with my white magas, I headed out for GRA.

To be continued


Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by TzIphekitan(m): 10:58am On Apr 01, 2016
Part 14

I knew krissh isn't a Fan of hollandia, so I guess a girl must be with him. Got to their domot, I sighted bosun firstly in the living room, he was with his laptop and on the screen I saw a sight like binu plus. So I suspected bosun sef na working boy [code name for YY guys] .

Me : the king is here

B.B : alaye since morning, how far now?

Me : MO gentle jae, bosun none binu plus be this on your system

B.B : yes it is

Immediately his phone rang, bosun change his voice on picking the call
, I knew this boy is something else.

Bosun : [speaking Queens English] Hello good morning [I was like sho. Morning for past four]

He and the caller kept talking for about 5mins, now it was clear to me he his a working boy

Me : bosun so you be YY too

Bosun : stay there, na illegal they pay o

Me : have been doing this for a while but i never hammer

Bosun : you can't hammer because you don't know the way. There are thousands of yahoo boys out there, no be everyone dey Successful.

Me : bosun how you dey take do ya own, show me the way.....

Krissh cuts in

Krissh : What should he show you oh?

I sighted a girl by her side, smh!,

Me : were cassanova, who put your mouth for my matter.
[to the girl beside her] elo bae, how far

No reply,

Krissh : Hey, she was just going.

The stupid girl just went out, I guess krissh must have squeeze her taya, that she can't even talk again.
Now remaining the three of us at the living room.

Me : henen bosun like I was saying before cockroach entered my soup.
How una take do am, show me the way na, which format you dey use.

Guessed krissh Don sabi wetin I dey talk

Krissh : na your papa be cockroach, mad boy. No tell am anything o Bosun.

Bosun was just laughing

Me : No dey do your guy like this now, me sef wan drive rangey.

B.B : easy tiger, it's because is you I no sabi tell any how person as the thing dey go. You see na everyone sabi the thing them believe in.

Krissh : na so oh boy, runs differ he get his own source, I get my own source

Me : What are you guys saying, make it clear for me na.

Bosun told me about one white garment church he do attend, he told me the primate of the church who was a lady, help him with his parol. He talk say him dey go bath there every two weeks.

And krissh told me it his own alfa, that all he does his give out to people, and he sprays white beans and corn outside the house every morning. In other for birds to feed on it.

I then told them
. "hope say this one no be yahoo plus oh, coz I no wan do anything evil"

They said it isn't, that this get God backing.

Smile returned to my face

I just brought out the hollandia from my bag, make i cool my spirit, krissh went in and came out with. " holy spirit" its the name of a wine oh.
We mixed it with the hollandia sharply..

So they agreed to take me to those places the next day.

To be continued.

19 Likes 3 Shares

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by TzIphekitan(m): 11:00am On Apr 01, 2016
Part 15

<i>Writing isn't easy especially when close friends of yours don't appreciate your piece of art, they call you jobless story teller, but i don't give a Bleep, it's what I av passion for. And i have fans that are following me back to back, so let them say what they like. </i>

The next day I took bro ola's lappy along with me to GRA.
Met the guys watching film on their systems.
I said, "you guys eh, you don't even hustle much, me Wey dey converse with maye 247, am not making doe up to you guys, woss wobi today na today, I don set o"

They were just laughing and they continued with their movie.
That pissed me die, I was like, "no be person I just talk to?"

I just went close to them and closed the lid of their lappy, bosun now said we would go by afternoon make I no spoil his movie jae "

I approach krissh, switched on my Pc

Me : Bobo, can I see the formats you do use?

Krissh : I don't do dating, I do goods and apartments

Me : sho ! Have never been interested in dealing with goods and the likes, but i guess since I have you, now is an avenue for me to learn it

Krissh : learner ni, I no get your time jae

Me : woss if don't teach me, i go frustrate your life for here oh, na only you wan dey make money, don’t be selfish Nigga!

Krissh : OK OK. But definitely not today.

Me : now you are making sense Nigga

Time - 2pm

B.B : guy it's time, Let's move

We went to his car, and he drove me to one with garment church at the river side.

When we got there, we were told to wait that the primate would be with us soon, I just decided to look around, I noticed the SENTENCE, national head quarters world wide, I just smiled to myself, na this small church be nation head quarters shio. While looking around, I saw one woman washing the head of another woman with the local sponge, and she was holding a white candle and praying forb5he other woman, I just switched my attention back to my phone and started chatting.

Few minutes later the woman washing someone's head outside came to join us. I was like so this woman is the primate of this church hmmm.

Bosun greeted her and i follow suit z the woman was just showering us with Prayer

B.B : maami, this the guy I told you about on the phone, we are in the same line of business xender he needs your help in boosting his wealth..

Primate : hmmmmn ngbo, boy whats the name, [now refering to me]

Me : it's iphekitan MA

Primate : is that the name you gave yourself or the one your mum gave you?

Me : the one I named myself MA, actually my mum named me ifeoluwa, so I just decided to Behind it up.

Primate : hmmmmn you kids of nowadays, do you know what your mum saw before giving you the name, well sha na you sabi.

Me : OK ma

Primate : OK Bosun you can leave us now, let me have a one on one conversation with your friend [Bosun went back to the car, next thing, the woman just draw her chair close to me, i was like why the close marking]

To be continued

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Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by TzIphekitan(m): 11:01am On Apr 01, 2016
Should I really minimise the use of pidgin?
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Mekky05(m): 11:27am On Apr 01, 2016
No, but make sure its correctly spelled and typed too.. I'm enjoying your flows bro!


Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by TzIphekitan(m): 11:34am On Apr 01, 2016
No, but make sure its correctly spelled and typed too.. I'm enjoying your flows bro!



Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by nastyd(m): 12:27pm On Apr 01, 2016
na crime e go b if i no drop comment..
Enjoying ur story so far.
An eye opener it is.
jst keep d updates flowing.


Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Nobody: 2:04pm On Apr 01, 2016
Part 16

The primate looked straight into my eyes, and said Let's pray, we prayed, after some couple of minutes. She said I would have to spend seven days confined on the church premises, fasting and praying ,on my mind I was like, " for where?, what excuse would I give them at home ".

I told her to give me time to think about it. Then went back to meet bosun by the car, he didn't even ask about the outcome of what I and the primate disscussed.

When We got home, we met krissh flexing with two babes. We greeted them and have our sit in the living room. I guess the girls weren't free in our presence so krissh took them to his room and came back.

Krissh : mister, how far? How was the place you went to?

Me : woss the woman was just telling me trash jae, she said I would have a 7days fasting and Prayer and during the 7days I would be confined in the church premises, isn't that ridiculous? .

Krissh : restricted ke, oh boy Let's go to my Alfa this evening, his sure than all this while garment geeks

Me : I would prefer that, because the highest number of days I fasted for was three days ans I do break by 12pm then.

Krissh : Holla me when it's five, we would headout by then, for now which one of those babes you saw with me are you interested in.

Me : I guess the light

Krissh : you guess?

Me : the light one!

Krissh : you want her because she's light or because she's thick and loaded

Me : na u sabi, any mean is edible

Krissh : OK she's gonna be with you in a jiffy

Krissh went back in,
I turned my gaze to bosun and he was already asleep. Smh lazy ass, the girl came to meet me in the living room. She introduced herself as bridget. We were just gist for the first five minutes because am not used to physical parols with girls. Along the line she was petting my face with her hands and looking into my eye balls directly. I guess she was giving me a head on, I didn't waste time, I grabbed her face and stucked my mouth into hers our lips found each other, and we started having a French kiss, smh a girl am seeing for the first time.

We were so much in the mood that we forgot about the sleeping bosun, we were almost unclad, caressing each other, she was moaning, thou I was yet to enter the place, I guessed the noise woke bosun.

B.B : ooh, you people won't let person sleep this afternoon [ he threw a key at me] Abeg carry ya bitch go inside jawe, no mess up this place for me.

Like superman I carried the bae into one of the rooms.. Well Yeah we had a nice time sha..... Guess you understand what happened indoor.
Later someone banged the door from outside

Me : who is that please?

Krissh : alaye, your own 5pm neva reach.

I checked my wristwatch and lo and behold I was 5:30pm on dot.
I hurried to dress, chai kitty catty won't get in the way of my sucess.

Me : give me some minutes please, ain't you the one who put me in this position.

The bae was still sleeping, I guessed she must have been exhausted from the powerful match we played.
I later went to join krissh in the living room, so we rolled out to his Alfa's place.

To be continued


Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Gmekx(m): 2:53pm On Apr 01, 2016
Op nice job so far

1 Like 2 Shares

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Ifakiland(m): 5:00pm On Apr 01, 2016
Interesting,keep it coming cheesy
u fine as fvck.


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