₦airaland Forum

It seems you already making things happen within you. Don't hurt yourself more by making conclusions. Just free your mind like nothing is happening. And if you cant bear it, who says its wrong for you to ask him out. Common ask him about it if you really have feelings for him..

Obviously getting stuck on a ship that may never sail is not a good way to go, and gwtting the ship to sail out of pity is even worse cos it might not withstand the temprous storm of the sea.

What I have said thus is simple. Hoping he will change his mind and do the right thing which is make his innermost intentions known to you as to wife you might not work as you might either get burnt or get him to marry you out of pity or the fear of losing the great friendship you both enjoy which might just not stand the thunderous storms marriages face cos he never really said I do with all his heart.
Having said that, I quite understand your precarious dilemma.
My advise thus is take your chance the Prophet Nathan and David way.
Tell him a well embellished story currently happening to a friend, a workmate, or anybody. Perhaps an enemy and act as if you are gloating over it and ask for his sincere advise or comments.
Be wise enough to paint it in such a way he would never understand, you sure know him better than I do.
Again, if he is the type that loves happy hour, give him a treat with a litttle bit overboard alcohol. Like its said"when alcohol goes in, truth comes out easily".
The whole essence is to know his genuine intentions without getting him to wife you out of pity when he is not sincerely convinced you are the one.
Just be careful dear. All the best and pls seek the face of the Lord in all you do. cheers

i broke up with my wife 2 different times before i eventually marry her

Malakh:
it wasn't that long i read it under five minutes, children of nowadays

[color=dodgerblue] it was Looooong[/color]

Msaza:
I think he has developed feelings for you but he is toying with you because he knows he has the upper hand. If another serious prospect appears at this very moment .... the dude will step up, i promise!!

the point is just, they are both playing with each other, and this life is not about how you wanted things, it is about accepting things the way it appears GARRY HILL

enkayhope:
What happened to "marry your friend ". I will advice u kip ur distance for sometimes n if u guys can't cope without each other,den give ur selves a try. He could be d angel in disguise u know.......

you started badly but you ended wisely, i did say brava!!!!!!!!!

Izen:
Hi guys. I'm in an emotional dilemma and I think the pressure of yet another Valentine's day without a boo is getting to me. Please as much as my write up might piss you off, please try not to insult me. I'm trying to avoid a total meltdown. Thanks in advance.

So there's this guy, we've been very close friends for six years now. There has always been romantic feelings on my part and I used to have the tiniest bit of hope that it was mutual. This was until he started dating a mutual friend. What hurt the most was that he tried to hide it from me despite our closeness. He claims it wasn't his idea though.

Let's just say I borrowed myself brain after that or so I thought. I started avoiding him as much as I could but he wouldn't let me be. He eventually asked me point blank if I liked him and after much beating about the bush, I answered in the affirmative. Apparently, other friends of ours had had to call his attention to my crush on him cos dude was clueless, "according to him". I asked him if he felt the same way and he told me that I was like a little sister to him. Alas, I was sister-zoned. Note that the age gap between us is barely more than a year. He told me he wouldn't lose me as a friend because I was special. Why wouldn't he just let me go?
Fast forward to a year+, he broke up with the mutual friend though I remained friends with both of them. I had nothing to do with the break up o. I was more comfortable rekindling our close friendship then since there was no longer a conflict of interest. It took me almost two years to get over him so at that time, my heart had moved on to other prospective guys.

Years down the line, I had to change locations to another state. It was one he was familiar with and had and still has a lot of business dealings in. Let's just say I still get to see him a lot.

We both dated other people. I got badly burnt by my ex and he was there for me. The tough love kind. As we spoke about my ex, that was when it hit me. This guy has always and probably will always have my back. I felt so comfortable sharing details with him. I knew then that I missed him a lot. I've been wondering what could have been between us ever since then. In fact, I started referring to him as my best friend. I know it's only a matter of time before it's necessary to let go of that bond tho. He's gone get married to his true bestie one day.

The thing now his, he's changed a bit. I know this because we've been friends a long time and I know him well. The calls have been more frequent, longer, etc. He always tries to see me when he can, same with me. This has got me wondering if this is the way normal friendships between the opposite sex are. He now says things like, "You're this and that and it's probably why you have an issue with XX. You do the same to me but I've come to accept it, there's nothing I can do about it". I interpreted this as him sticking with me flaws and all.
At one of our discussions, he told me he would love to marry someone he's known for a long time and he used us as an example. I went on the defensive immediately and told him I couldn't marry him. That bothered him a lot and he didn't stop until he pressed me for a reason. I threw his question back in his face and asked him if he could marry me and he said yes. I pushed harder and asked if he would marry me (not as a proposal lol), he laughed about this. I eventually told him I couldn't marry him cos he hasn't proposed to me and I cannot propose to him. When he tried to form, "so you'll marry me if I ask you to", I just asked to drop the topic totally.

I know I'm supposed to be elated but instead I'm hurt. I feel like I've been emotionally played and I'm still being played in my best years. How can he do this now? Does he know how much it cost me to try to get over him the first time? Apparently, I never fully succeeded. He's toying with my emotions again and I believe he knows that. I wanted to remind him that he sister-zoned me but I held back. I can't do this again guys. Please, I just can't.
Do you think he now has romantic feelings for me but he's deliberately holding back. Do you think he's trying to give me hints? I'm tempted to shut this friendship down totally. I can't go through this heartbreak again. It hurt the first time and I'm sure it'll hurt more this time. I know shutting down this friendship will be like a break up for me cos he's been such a huge part of my life but I think that's the only way I can truly get over him. I may or may not tell him but I plan to gradually withdraw. No calls, no texts, until he gets the memo. I really need to heal cos my relationship with him has indirectly affected other relationships I have. I'm falling madly in love with him again and I need it to stop.

So guys, please should I let go now or should I hold on to a little hope that he comes around based on his recent actions.?

My sister to be honest with you, that guy will end up been your husband. Do you think if he wants to marry he will marry any of those girls he dated? NO
Just try again to remove your mind totally from loving the guy and let faith take it's course. But I'm telling you, out of all the ladies in his life you have a higher chance.

magabounce:
You know!!!!
It's pretty simple!!!
I sister zoned a friend for 5 years!!
She came out plain and said Omang I love you!! I would like us to date!!!
We 2 years now and waxing stronger!!!
Trust ur guts!!!

this man also makes a sense too, i think i should start resting my case

Izen:
Hi guys. I'm in an emotional dilemma and I think the pressure of yet another Valentine's day without a boo is getting to me. Please as much as my write up might piss you off, please try not to insult me. I'm trying to avoid a total meltdown. Thanks in advance.

So there's this guy, we've been very close friends for six years now. There has always been romantic feelings on my part and I used to have the tiniest bit of hope that it was mutual. This was until he started dating a mutual friend. What hurt the most was that he tried to hide it from me despite our closeness. He claims it wasn't his idea though.

Let's just say I borrowed myself brain after that or so I thought. I started avoiding him as much as I could but he wouldn't let me be. He eventually asked me point blank if I liked him and after much beating about the bush, I answered in the affirmative. Apparently, other friends of ours had had to call his attention to my crush on him cos dude was clueless, "according to him". I asked him if he felt the same way and he told me that I was like a little sister to him. Alas, I was sister-zoned. Note that the age gap between us is barely more than a year. He told me he wouldn't lose me as a friend because I was special. Why wouldn't he just let me go?
Fast forward to a year+, he broke up with the mutual friend though I remained friends with both of them. I had nothing to do with the break up o. I was more comfortable rekindling our close friendship then since there was no longer a conflict of interest. It took me almost two years to get over him so at that time, my heart had moved on to other prospective guys.

Years down the line, I had to change locations to another state. It was one he was familiar with and had and still has a lot of business dealings in. Let's just say I still get to see him a lot.

We both dated other people. I got badly burnt by my ex and he was there for me. The tough love kind. As we spoke about my ex, that was when it hit me. This guy has always and probably will always have my back. I felt so comfortable sharing details with him. I knew then that I missed him a lot. I've been wondering what could have been between us ever since then. In fact, I started referring to him as my best friend. I know it's only a matter of time before it's necessary to let go of that bond tho. He's gone get married to his true bestie one day.

The thing now his, he's changed a bit. I know this because we've been friends a long time and I know him well. The calls have been more frequent, longer, etc. He always tries to see me when he can, same with me. This has got me wondering if this is the way normal friendships between the opposite sex are. He now says things like, "You're this and that and it's probably why you have an issue with XX. You do the same to me but I've come to accept it, there's nothing I can do about it". I interpreted this as him sticking with me flaws and all.
At one of our discussions, he told me he would love to marry someone he's known for a long time and he used us as an example. I went on the defensive immediately and told him I couldn't marry him. That bothered him a lot and he didn't stop until he pressed me for a reason. I threw his question back in his face and asked him if he could marry me and he said yes. I pushed harder and asked if he would marry me (not as a proposal lol), he laughed about this. I eventually told him I couldn't marry him cos he hasn't proposed to me and I cannot propose to him. When he tried to form, "so you'll marry me if I ask you to", I just asked to drop the topic totally.

I know I'm supposed to be elated but instead I'm hurt. I feel like I've been emotionally played and I'm still being played in my best years. How can he do this now? Does he know how much it cost me to try to get over him the first time? Apparently, I never fully succeeded. He's toying with my emotions again and I believe he knows that. I wanted to remind him that he sister-zoned me but I held back. I can't do this again guys. Please, I just can't.
Do you think he now has romantic feelings for me but he's deliberately holding back. Do you think he's trying to give me hints? I'm tempted to shut this friendship down totally. I can't go through this heartbreak again. It hurt the first time and I'm sure it'll hurt more this time. I know shutting down this friendship will be like a break up for me cos he's been such a huge part of my life but I think that's the only way I can truly get over him. I may or may not tell him but I plan to gradually withdraw. No calls, no texts, until he gets the memo. I really need to heal cos my relationship with him has indirectly affected other relationships I have. I'm falling madly in love with him again and I need it to stop.

So guys, please should I let go now or should I hold on to a little hope that he comes around based on his recent actions.?

The truth is: no potent guy friendzones a girl or lady he is attracted to, it doesn't happen, so think about this

Apus:
I used to fill his shoes. Maybe he was scared of ruining d friendship between u two. What if dating doesn't workout, would u still b his friend etc? He just had to calculate d risks involved. Swallow ur pride and If u still have feelings for him forget d past & d emotional-play ish, cos it's obvious it wasn't intentional. He sounds too sweet for him to do any of such to You...
Pls my sister go with d flow cos I believe love between friends is like love made in Heaven.

bravo!!!!!!!!!!! this person must have said my heart, i think i should pack my load and get out of this trend

Aaaaarghmed:
the guy is a weakling and doesnt wana Man up...he wants u to ask him out,,,its already clear dat he is toying with your emotions and when u futher ask him out that wud be the end cos he wud toy with ur emotions completely.if he sees a serious toaster around u i swear he wud man up and ask u out.dont allow pple toy with u all in d name of love.

what are you saying, is this a point, i think this man should be given

sunshyne20:
@OP, don't give him any distance, I can relate to all you wrote because I AM EXACTLY like him, I think it's scientific, because I also have someone I love so much but can't tell her, Because I presumed; I am shy, she is too good, I am not good enough or just trying to become the best I can be for her(before engaging her), I could tell you I did same in my 200L 2011, I had a lady I loved so much but helped her date someone while I went ahead too to date someone else.
Until this day I am still in communication with her and she is even about to get married which I am not comfortable with, but those points keep playing in my mind.
But all I need from her is to reassure me of her love, and make me comfortable working with her.
All he needs is reassurance, a guy wouldnt spend time with you if he doesn't want something from you, and I am sure he doesn't want sex, so keep at him, give him you heart and make him believe you are there for him.
#bestwishes

you got 60% i think, nice comment though, try more

Try to be yourself when you're with him, this guys loves you to death and the feeling is mutual. Wonder why the both of you were foolish enough to toy with other relationships when what you have between you is a love affair made in heaven.

Izen:
He's always known how I feel. That's the problem I have with him. And trust me, hot is an understatement. He keeps getting hotter by the day sef and he's always been a ladies' man.

...Awww you are smitten!!...I know its hard but give him space and mean it!!..Say and act it like you mean it..This guy is toying with your feelings so cut him loose..Please dont make yourself a charity case or someone he can fall back on because he has no choice.

....You need a healthy relationship my dear and this right here is not one.

...And finally stay away from 'hot and spicy guys' abeg..they are usually shallow and spoilt for choice.

webninja:
Lol typical nigerian girl. Just tell him how you feel kid, if he doesn't feel the same way, tell him you can't remain friends with him anymore because you'll never feel comfortable having a friendship with him ever again... he'll respect you more and if he had any feelings for you, it'll be even stronger since you make life easy for him by shooting the gun on target... if you want something, take it! Supposing he is a super hot/handsome guy, you wouldn't be asking such a stupíd question in the first place. this is the 21st century baby.. grow up.

exactly, you got 70% i think you made nice comment, try more

The guy is trying to play double game... using u as extra tyre, immediately he loses any of his propose girlfriend he runs back to you.... to make sure that atleast even if my new tyre busted I have extra tyre...... my advise is, I see the guy as stumbling block, is not ready to do and is preventing you from moving forward....you better cutoff d relationship... and let God choose for you.

@Izen...

I hope you get to see this... Our stories are similar... Just that i'm a guy and you a girl...

Long story short... I wasn't sure for 8-9 years until one of her toasters called her my wife in front of me... It was that day i told her how i truly felt...

We prolly would be doing sister and brother from another mother this year if something didn't trigger my feelings that i tried hard not to show...

She's my best friend and future wife and by God's grace our introduction is this year...

Long and short of it... Jealousy can be put to good use if channelled correctly...

An alomo popper found love... It's unbelieveable... Yeah... But i did...

Hope you read this and know what to do.

Izen:
Hi guys. I'm in an emotional dilemma and I think the pressure of yet another Valentine's day without a boo is getting to me. Please as much as my write up might piss you off, please try not to insult me. I'm trying to avoid a total meltdown. Thanks in advance.

So there's this guy, we've been very close friends for six years now. There has always been romantic feelings on my part and I used to have the tiniest bit of hope that it was mutual. This was until he started dating a mutual friend. What hurt the most was that he tried to hide it from me despite our closeness. He claims it wasn't his idea though.

Let's just say I borrowed myself brain after that or so I thought. I started avoiding him as much as I could but he wouldn't let me be. He eventually asked me point blank if I liked him and after much beating about the bush, I answered in the affirmative. Apparently, other friends of ours had had to call his attention to my crush on him cos dude was clueless, "according to him". I asked him if he felt the same way and he told me that I was like a little sister to him. Alas, I was sister-zoned. Note that the age gap between us is barely more than a year. He told me he wouldn't lose me as a friend because I was special. Why wouldn't he just let me go?
Fast forward to a year+, he broke up with the mutual friend though I remained friends with both of them. I had nothing to do with the break up o. I was more comfortable rekindling our close friendship then since there was no longer a conflict of interest. It took me almost two years to get over him so at that time, my heart had moved on to other prospective guys.

Years down the line, I had to change locations to another state. It was one he was familiar with and had and still has a lot of business dealings in. Let's just say I still get to see him a lot.

We both dated other people. I got badly burnt by my ex and he was there for me. The tough love kind. As we spoke about my ex, that was when it hit me. This guy has always and probably will always have my back. I felt so comfortable sharing details with him. I knew then that I missed him a lot. I've been wondering what could have been between us ever since then. In fact, I started referring to him as my best friend. I know it's only a matter of time before it's necessary to let go of that bond tho. He's gone get married to his true bestie one day.

The thing now his, he's changed a bit. I know this because we've been friends a long time and I know him well. The calls have been more frequent, longer, etc. He always tries to see me when he can, same with me. This has got me wondering if this is the way normal friendships between the opposite sex are. He now says things like, "You're this and that and it's probably why you have an issue with XX. You do the same to me but I've come to accept it, there's nothing I can do about it". I interpreted this as him sticking with me flaws and all.
At one of our discussions, he told me he would love to marry someone he's known for a long time and he used us as an example. I went on the defensive immediately and told him I couldn't marry him. That bothered him a lot and he didn't stop until he pressed me for a reason. I threw his question back in his face and asked him if he could marry me and he said yes. I pushed harder and asked if he would marry me (not as a proposal lol), he laughed about this. I eventually told him I couldn't marry him cos he hasn't proposed to me and I cannot propose to him. When he tried to form, "so you'll marry me if I ask you to", I just asked to drop the topic totally.

I know I'm supposed to be elated but instead I'm hurt. I feel like I've been emotionally played and I'm still being played in my best years. How can he do this now? Does he know how much it cost me to try to get over him the first time? Apparently, I never fully succeeded. He's toying with my emotions again and I believe he knows that. I wanted to remind him that he sister-zoned me but I held back. I can't do this again guys. Please, I just can't.
Do you think he now has romantic feelings for me but he's deliberately holding back. Do you think he's trying to give me hints? I'm tempted to shut this friendship down totally. I can't go through this heartbreak again. It hurt the first time and I'm sure it'll hurt more this time. I know shutting down this friendship will be like a break up for me cos he's been such a huge part of my life but I think that's the only way I can truly get over him. I may or may not tell him but I plan to gradually withdraw. No calls, no texts, until he gets the memo. I really need to heal cos my relationship with him has indirectly affected other relationships I have. I'm falling madly in love with him again and I need it to stop.

So guys, please should I let go now or should I hold on to a little hope that he comes around based on his recent actions.?

first things first, you are sounding desperate. if you are looking for a valentine boo, there are loads of single guys out there(not because they can't date, but because of low finance and they do not want insult from any girl). you also need to stop making yourself constantly available to this your so called bestie.. i read your previous posts and it appears you crush on nearly all your male besties... that being said, i am available if your available(#justsaying... no one knows where his/her soulmate is. now, permit me to say this, in my limited wisdom i do not think it is advisable to date a bestie you have had for many years, this is because i feel he will take you for granted, since you already know everything or nearly everything about him he will expect you to handle his baggage without making any effort to work on his baggage, afterall you knew he was this and that and yet you accepted to date him. but there are always exceptions to the case, but you should make him work real hard in getting you to be his woman, that way when you finally say yes he will see you as a trophy and treat you as such. if you are open to my proposal send me an email, its in my bio. #peace.... oh... feb 14th is 7 days away, time is tick ticking

showmeurpenis:
Blah blah bah

Have you seen his _penis

Wait, did I jus read that?

summary:they were friends, he dated her bestie, she got heartbroken, took two years to get over him, now he wants to get back with her, she's still in love but she doesn't wanna get hurt the second time....so she is seeking counsel

DeepFriedPuff:
[color=dodgerblue] it was Looooong[/color]

Izen:
Hi guys. I'm in an emotional dilemma and I think the pressure of yet another Valentine's day without a boo is getting to me. Please as much as my write up might piss you off, please try not to insult me. I'm trying to avoid a total meltdown. Thanks in advance.

So there's this guy, we've been very close friends for six years now. There has always been romantic feelings on my part and I used to have the tiniest bit of hope that it was mutual. This was until he started dating a mutual friend. What hurt the most was that he tried to hide it from me despite our closeness. He claims it wasn't his idea though.

Let's just say I borrowed myself brain after that or so I thought. I started avoiding him as much as I could but he wouldn't let me be. He eventually asked me point blank if I liked him and after much beating about the bush, I answered in the affirmative. Apparently, other friends of ours had had to call his attention to my crush on him cos dude was clueless, "according to him". I asked him if he felt the same way and he told me that I was like a little sister to him. Alas, I was sister-zoned. Note that the age gap between us is barely more than a year. He told me he wouldn't lose me as a friend because I was special. Why wouldn't he just let me go?
Fast forward to a year+, he broke up with the mutual friend though I remained friends with both of them. I had nothing to do with the break up o. I was more comfortable rekindling our close friendship then since there was no longer a conflict of interest. It took me almost two years to get over him so at that time, my heart had moved on to other prospective guys.

Years down the line, I had to change locations to another state. It was one he was familiar with and had and still has a lot of business dealings in. Let's just say I still get to see him a lot.

We both dated other people. I got badly burnt by my ex and he was there for me. The tough love kind. As we spoke about my ex, that was when it hit me. This guy has always and probably will always have my back. I felt so comfortable sharing details with him. I knew then that I missed him a lot. I've been wondering what could have been between us ever since then. In fact, I started referring to him as my best friend. I know it's only a matter of time before it's necessary to let go of that bond tho. He's gone get married to his true bestie one day.

The thing now his, he's changed a bit. I know this because we've been friends a long time and I know him well. The calls have been more frequent, longer, etc. He always tries to see me when he can, same with me. This has got me wondering if this is the way normal friendships between the opposite sex are. He now says things like, "You're this and that and it's probably why you have an issue with XX. You do the same to me but I've come to accept it, there's nothing I can do about it". I interpreted this as him sticking with me flaws and all.
At one of our discussions, he told me he would love to marry someone he's known for a long time and he used us as an example. I went on the defensive immediately and told him I couldn't marry him. That bothered him a lot and he didn't stop until he pressed me for a reason. I threw his question back in his face and asked him if he could marry me and he said yes. I pushed harder and asked if he would marry me (not as a proposal lol), he laughed about this. I eventually told him I couldn't marry him cos he hasn't proposed to me and I cannot propose to him. When he tried to form, "so you'll marry me if I ask you to", I just asked to drop the topic totally.

I know I'm supposed to be elated but instead I'm hurt. I feel like I've been emotionally played and I'm still being played in my best years. How can he do this now? Does he know how much it cost me to try to get over him the first time? Apparently, I never fully succeeded. He's toying with my emotions again and I believe he knows that. I wanted to remind him that he sister-zoned me but I held back. I can't do this again guys. Please, I just can't.
Do you think he now has romantic feelings for me but he's deliberately holding back. Do you think he's trying to give me hints? I'm tempted to shut this friendship down totally. I can't go through this heartbreak again. It hurt the first time and I'm sure it'll hurt more this time. I know shutting down this friendship will be like a break up for me cos he's been such a huge part of my life but I think that's the only way I can truly get over him. I may or may not tell him but I plan to gradually withdraw. No calls, no texts, until he gets the memo. I really need to heal cos my relationship with him has indirectly affected other relationships I have. I'm falling madly in love with him again and I need it to stop.

So guys, please should I let go now or should I hold on to a little hope that he comes around based on his recent actions.?

From what I can read into this, you love this guy. He is more of the your better half, but he has no clue about it. I also infer that he likes you (or He loves you) , but one thing or another is holding him back or maybe he has no clue.


I'm giving this suggestion as a guy, something I would like if I were in his position and you were the girl. This is my suggestion, "try let him see this post", yes, you can claim it's not from you, but it can be your story and you feel associated with it.

After letting him see this post!

See his response. And one more thing, to really know what to do with your life, confess your feelings for him. Its not a crime, Let him know how you feel, ask him about his feeling towards you. Let him explain his true self to you. Let him know how it felt the first time, how long it got you to get over him.

Yes, it may appear awkward and you may not like the idea, but, truthfully, you will know your position after this conversation. And, if I were the guy, and I have no clue about your feelings about me, I would appreciate it if you let me know. You can never tell what may happen next

Omooniya1:
The guy is trying to play double game... using u as extra tyre, immediately he loses any of his propose girlfriend he runs back to you.... to make sure that atleast even if my new tyre busted I have extra tyre...... my advise is, I see the guy as stumbling block, is not ready to do and is preventing you from moving forward....you better cutoff d relationship... and let God choose for you.

well said, couldn't have said it better.

Confess your love to him, let him know how you feel... His rejection may make it easier for you to get over him, or, you could get what you really want...


Playing the long game will only be to your detriment... Biological clock and all.

LeView:
Life is simple we just complicate things.

Instead of having a relationship with him in your head you could just speak to him. All this we are so close crap yet you can't tell him what's important. Lol! Us women are soo crazy! I love where you blamed him for doing something he doesn't even know he is doing! When will we quit this victim card we pull out whenever we are emotionally confused! Tell the man what's eating you up! Tell him with a smile that you need a little space to clear your head because your friendship is making you feel a connection that might not be there.


Ps for future reference! Men and women who are attracted to each other can never be friends! Maybe If there were no feelings especially from you because you are the one who complicated things here by befriending a man you love.

Stop being a coward if he's such a great friend he will understand. Although your relationship /friendship sounds a bit fake. Anyway, do the right thing and not the easy thing that's my advice to you.

God bless u jare... u took d words right out of my mouth.

i can feel ur pain and i know it is not easy
becos exactly same happen with my ex while we were dating and finally lead to our breaking up...
telling the guy everything, including her most darkest deepest secret...
she always brings up the marriage issue with him...(those are wat i read from her whatsapp)

as a man i knew the guy didn't love her anymore.
{i talk to her and advice her like a sister, and told her she could just date the guy instead of them talking about how they are fucking/treating other... She told me he was her secondary bf and she obviously still hard feelings for him but not sure how he feels}..
i went to the extend of meeting n talking with the guy becos i really wanted to settle down with her... and ask him if he was going to marry or even date her...

Just like someone said, a guy that is attracted to you will not leave you on a friendzone especially after knowing about your feeling.
i wonder how you guys talk about fucking other people n other dirty talk...in the name of love/friendship with no secret,, n still expect the guy to b crazy about u...(i mean isn't that suppose to be guys talk...girls talk)

at the end i let her go, no matter how much i loved her....

what i learnt from situation like this is that, the truth will be staring you in the face but your feelings would not let you accept it..

Moral lesson: Love is not an excuse to be foolish,

#MyTwoCent
and

showmeurpenis:
Blah blah bah

Have you seen his _penis

biko what has penis got to do with diz

This lady got it wrong at first. To have told him u loved him was wrong and childish. The art of seduction is a game in actual fact. U don't give ur attacker d feeling that he's got u... Else d game is up and d chase is over. Men and women are very intriguing creatures, and interest has to be sustained at all cost.
But d goodnews is dat u're getting it right now... Admitting u won't marry him made u look like a treasure... Some priceless asset which he suddenly started craving for. U must strive to keep up dis game. At times, give him d feeling that he's caught u and let him bask in d momentary happpiness. Then slip off thru his finger and d game up again. Tell me u don't have d strength for dis game and die with d dilemma of being sister-zoned. U must fan d flames of his desire with manipulative withdrawal and watch him copme all out for u. U know what? At d end, even if he doesn't get to put d ring on ur 4th finger, he'll live with ur memories forever and u'll be glad u won urself a soul.

babe as a guy will advice u to run, if he wants you he will come all out, or he culd just be playing with your feelings and acting like he dosnt knw. ..give him enough space, it will help him one wat he wants! probably he likes ure person but ure not his spec

Izen:
It's in this kind of atmosphere that all this marriage talk and all comes up. He's had the chance to tell me how he feels several times, if he truly feels something. You're kinda right about the different levels lol. That part is a little complicated. In fact, I believe both of us feel we're advancing faster than the other only that it's from different perspectives.

i just think he is afraid of hurting you, dats is you guys might date nt end up marrying each other.

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Izen:
Give him space temporarily or permanently?

Please give him a long space and keep yourself very busy and occupied.

Izen:
He's always known how I feel. That's the problem I have with him. And trust me, hot is an understatement. He keeps getting hotter by the day sef and he's always been a ladies' man.

I think you should stop making that assumption/ excuse. He might know you have feelings for him but nothing is better than being explicit therefore You really really need to talk to him about your feelings again. Just tell him you still have feelings for him no matter how much the outcome scares you and if he still doesn't return your feelings, tell him you can't be friends anymore and cut off all contact with him. You should stop languishing in the emotional prison you put yourself in and set your soul free.