₦airaland Forum

Nnemuka:
very irresponsible, look at the case of our celebrity marriages. these marriages fold within one year and i don't see the trend going away soon.
when a guy enters into a date with a lady all he tells himself is that he is doing the lady a favor, with that mindset he becomes a dog immediately he puts her in the house. Women are gradually becoming wiser, so they rather prefer to pursue their dreams in life, become selfmade than using their prime to shed tears till they die of hypertension.

Why you made nice conclusion, I think you didn't start well. The poster you quoted was not being real. Guys are not becoming irresponsible and it is not fair to use the life of celebrities to judge others. Except of you don't know they are celebrities. This is their lifestyle, and that is how it will be.

what is the point getting married early without happiness simply because you want people to say you married early. there is absolutely nothing wrong with a woman waiting for her Mr Right, because that's what will give her happiness, and besides I don't think marriage is compulsory neither is it a priority so it all depends on how you want your life to be.

Nnemuka:
very irresponsible, look at the case of our celebrity marriages. these marriages fold within one year and i don't see the trend going away soon.
when a guy enters into a date with a lady all he tells himself is that he is doing the lady a favor, with that mindset he becomes a dog immediately he puts her in the house. Women are gradually becoming wiser, so they rather prefer to pursue their dreams in life, become selfmade than using their prime to shed tears till they die of hypertension.

I have looked at the case of our mothers and grand mothers critically, and come to the conclusion that what a woman needs to be happy is money and children ,except this generation changes , I see the family system going down cos this set of men are even worse when it come to irresponsibility

Cried tears of happiness reading this.

Way to go lady !

selflessmaya:
i love threads like these because while they show me how stupid some nigerians are, some comments also remind me that we have some functional thinking ppl in this country.
the reason while there are more spinsters in this generation is because nigerian women are finally realizing they can do and deserve better. most men here riding the "go and marry" brigade are the worst specimen of men out there. let's be fu<king honest, let's go there, how many nigerians want to have a marriage exactly like their parents? i grew up in a stable household with very nice parents but i can personally say that i dont want a marriage like theirs, a lot of you here talking trash wont even exist in this day and age cos your mothers wouldn't have settled with your fathers. but the differnce is that girls grow up wanting and grooming themselves for a more romantic fun marriage and guys are just more than comfortable being as uninteresting as wet bread.

most nigerians are very bitter when they see a woman who wants to do well for herself, be it a woman who strives for independence and success or a woman who wants to marry well and won't settle for less. that's why they gather like ants when celebrity marriages fail because they love to laugh at those who even had the nerve to think they can have it all and still have their happy ending and i'm using celebrities as an example because they're the only public cases we get to see. this is why successful women like genevieve and rita dominic are constantly told "go and marry" by ppl here who can't even afford 1/10th of the life they live, that's why anytime a scandal arises about adaeze yobo's marriage, they gather around to laugh and say "she never see anything" meanwhile she married at 20 and did not even get the chance to "slay mama" before marrying like most ppl like to justify their dragging with, that is why they drag female celebs who got out of unhappy marriages when they cry on camera, then drag them when they show signs of moving on with their lives. this is why they're happy whenever a new rumor rises about caroline danjuma's husband's cheating, "oh she thought fine girl will save her" "haha shey she's the one that wanted rich husband", this is why they're at the uche jumbo thread typing "ghen ghen" hoping her marriage fails so they can come again to tell women that working hard and being a boss is nahhht the way to go. this is why when an everyday case of domestic violence goes viral, they sympathize but when it's a successful woman who's a celebrity they do the most trying to attribute everything to her celebrity status, she must have been a bad wife (because she's successful in her own right and we all know women who don't need you in order to feed are just terrible and must be dragged)

the issue here is not that many women are not marrying but that many men are NOT marriage material but were raised believing "a man is never ugly" "woman education ends in kitchen" "let boys be boys"and they drank it in whole and did nothing to better themselves and are mad that girls are out here calling their bluff, getting sh!t done and not that bothered about marriage anymore with a "if it happens, it happens, if it doesnt, boo freaking hoo" mindset. basically these men are angry because they cant attract gold while being trash but in the old days of lesser female empowerment a lot of amazing women had to settle for whatever comes their way and these generation of girls are saying NO!!! no more being a maid with glorified title of wife, if men are not ready to be husbands, many girls these days are not ready to sit around wifeing for them and cleaning up after a grown man, whiny like a baby with a head full of entitlement that they dont even possess. many ppl born in the 80s-90s grew up in a world totally different from what it is now and they're refusing to stay stagnant as the times change. women are more practical these days, all the "slay mamas" are hated because girls these days are no more the breed to grow up with an impractical view of how life works, they see the harsh realities surrounding them and they know now that marriage is not a prize but a huge gamble. these men are so angry that women wayyy above them wont reduce their standards and settle for them, so mr man, why dont u reduce your own standard and find girls your own level, it's because mr man was lied to and told that a man is a prize and any girl will give an arm and a leg to have him and reality is just punching holes in the bubble he lives in. women just dont view men as a prize anymore, they view them as human beings and if u can't be the one, they're fine earning their cash, paying their bills and watching whiny threads like these from their comfortable cozy homes, live with it.

ps. lol at the one complaining that girls these days want wedding, pre-wedding pic and reception which is expensive in his opinion and they should settle for court marriage, my friend, when women were marrying a lot like u claim, the same laws applied, you're just broke.

start seeing them differently?,the truth is, even as guy, when u see a serious lady, u know immediately, u don't expect me to c a slay queen and treat her any different from d slay queen she portrays herself to be,she is meant to be slain on my bed, u raised nice points tho, but from experience, I would say, even a play boy knows his time is up when he sees "The one"

sshola:
Oh, so you all know it takes sometime to be self made. Yet you can't be patient for a man to grow, rather you want him instantly rich as if na noodles.. .#sheerdeceit

Shola you are on point.

tosyne2much:
Emusmity, this write-up is well researched and articulated

I think the reason why most ladies end up in late marriage is because they live in fantasies and view marriage from a myopic view. That is to say that they screen and discard men for ridiculous reasons in their prime just to satisfy their fantasies.

Another thing that don't make men take them serious is that some of them have nauseating characters and are fond of saying "accept me for who I am". Most of these ladies don't really work on their attitudes but are only concerned about how to bleach, enlarge their butts/bosoms and look better than other ladies. The truth of the matter is that there is no perfect lady anywhere, but any lady who doesn't want to subject herself under the control a man will surely end up chasing men away.

And when they can no longer find men that will take them serious, they automatically become feminists. They become arrogant and will start raining abusive words on men that they are worthless

You just spoke my mind. 90% of feminist falls into this category.

mrphysics:
Why you made nice conclusion, I think you didn't start well. The poster you quoted was not being real. Guys are not becoming irresponsible and it is not fair to use the life of celebrities to judge others. Except of you don't know they are celebrities. This is their lifestyle, and that is how it will be.

Well you need to carry the research yourself and your findings will justify my views.
Why not use celebrities to judge? they are human beings and they too have souls. You think Linda and Bimbo are still single because they were choosy? no pls.
The number of responsible, genuine men are declining. we are left with high number of wild, inconsiderate liars that will cheat on you, beat you up thus making you miserable.

Some reject everything that comes their way

selflessmaya:
i love threads like these because while they show me how stupid some nigerians are, some comments also remind me that we have some functional thinking ppl in this country.
the reason while there are more spinsters in this generation is because nigerian women are finally realizing they can do and deserve better. most men here riding the "go and marry" brigade are the worst specimen of men out there. let's be fu<king honest, let's go there, how many nigerians want to have a marriage exactly like their parents? i grew up in a stable household with very nice parents but i can personally say that i dont want a marriage like theirs, a lot of you here talking trash wont even exist in this day and age cos your mothers wouldn't have settled with your fathers. but the differnce is that girls grow up wanting and grooming themselves for a more romantic fun marriage and guys are just more than comfortable being as uninteresting as wet bread.

most nigerians are very bitter when they see a woman who wants to do well for herself, be it a woman who strives for independence and success or a woman who wants to marry well and won't settle for less. that's why they gather like ants when celebrity marriages fail because they love to laugh at those who even had the nerve to think they can have it all and still have their happy ending and i'm using celebrities as an example because they're the only public cases we get to see. this is why successful women like genevieve and rita dominic are constantly told "go and marry" by ppl here who can't even afford 1/10th of the life they live, that's why anytime a scandal arises about adaeze yobo's marriage, they gather around to laugh and say "she never see anything" meanwhile she married at 20 and did not even get the chance to "slay mama" before marrying like most ppl like to justify their dragging with, that is why they drag female celebs who got out of unhappy marriages when they cry on camera, then drag them when they show signs of moving on with their lives. this is why they're happy whenever a new rumor rises about caroline danjuma's husband's cheating, "oh she thought fine girl will save her" "haha shey she's the one that wanted rich husband", this is why they're at the uche jumbo thread typing "ghen ghen" hoping her marriage fails so they can come again to tell women that working hard and being a boss is nahhht the way to go. this is why when an everyday case of domestic violence goes viral, they sympathize but when it's a successful woman who's a celebrity they do the most trying to attribute everything to her celebrity status, she must have been a bad wife (because she's successful in her own right and we all know women who don't need you in order to feed are just terrible and must be dragged)

the issue here is not that many women are not marrying but that many men are NOT marriage material but were raised believing "a man is never ugly" "woman education ends in kitchen" "let boys be boys"and they drank it in whole and did nothing to better themselves and are mad that girls are out here calling their bluff, getting sh!t done and not that bothered about marriage anymore with a "if it happens, it happens, if it doesnt, boo freaking hoo" mindset. basically these men are angry because they cant attract gold while being trash but in the old days of lesser female empowerment a lot of amazing women had to settle for whatever comes their way and these generation of girls are saying NO!!! no more being a maid with glorified title of wife, if men are not ready to be husbands, many girls these days are not ready to sit around wifeing for them and cleaning up after a grown man, whiny like a baby with a head full of entitlement that they dont even possess. many ppl born in the 80s-90s grew up in a world totally different from what it is now and they're refusing to stay stagnant as the times change. women are more practical these days, all the "slay mamas" are hated because girls these days are no more the breed to grow up with an impractical view of how life works, they see the harsh realities surrounding them and they know now that marriage is not a prize but a huge gamble. these men are so angry that women wayyy above them wont reduce their standards and settle for them, so mr man, why dont u reduce your own standard and find girls your own level, it's because mr man was lied to and told that a man is a prize and any girl will give an arm and a leg to have him and reality is just punching holes in the bubble he lives in. women just dont view men as a prize anymore, they view them as human beings and if u can't be the one, they're fine earning their cash, paying their bills and watching whiny threads like these from their comfortable cozy homes, live with it.

ps. lol at the one complaining that girls these days want wedding, pre-wedding pic and reception which is expensive in his opinion and they should settle for court marriage, my friend, when women were marrying a lot like u claim, the same laws applied, you're just broke.

Nnemuka:
Well you need to carry the research yourself and your findings will justify my views.
Why not use celebrities to judge? they are human beings and they too have souls. You think Linda and Bimbo are still single because they were choosy? no pls.
The number of responsible, genuine men are declining. we are left with high number of wild, inconsiderate liars that will cheat on you, beat you up thus making you miserable.

Leave that one, maybe he lives in a hole. So, he isn't seeing all the yahoo boys, rape stories, domestic violence, rising infidelity, kidnappers, ritualists, armed robbers, drug abuse by our young men...etc. It's only slay queen they see.

Sylva2147:
what is the point getting married early without happiness simply because you want people to say you married early. there is absolutely nothing wrong with a woman waiting for her Mr Right, because that's what will give her happiness, and besides I don't think marriage is compulsory neither is it a priority so it all depends on how you want your life to be.

Who is Mr Right abeg what traits must he possess
Thanks for answering

Most of them wasted their prime years because of too much forming. That is why I don't pity them when they start looking for husbands in their latter years.

Viking007:
You will hardly see a thread about education, religion, careers, technology etc gathering such a massive traffic & attention. We tend to give a lot of attention to absolute rubbish in this part of the world. Who marriage help bikonu?

How many thread on careers, technology, religion have you opened?
Idiiot, dirty pot calling dirty plates dirty.

IamKashyBaby:


Aha...well, some of us that are still single, simply bcoz we dont go down with all the BS some men will bring on the table...

Some of us are busy chasing our own dreams..dream to be a selfmade woman..

And some of us, juz dont believe in marriage as a true happiness..Marriage is NOT for everyone anyway..

And how successful are the ladies despite this attitude of "I want to face my career". It's high time you change from this and face the obvious reality that time is really of essence.
The God's way for us to be complete is to have a life partner through marriage. May God help all single guys and ladies find the right partners that will give them the happiness they wish for.

gokuu:
Everyday a new stupid post comes up.

How did op arrive at this conclusion that there has been an increase in "Women above 28 who are not married"? What was the null hypothesis? sample size? where was this study carried out? sampling method? He probably just overhead the crazy thought in a drunken beer parlour discussion and brought it on here.

Even if more Women are choosing to join the workforce and develop careers, is that not a fantastic thing. It is sure better to have Women contributing to the absolute GDP figures as opposed to reducing per capita GDP by becoming baby factories.

All these illiterate men that only think about marriage and babies are the ones pulling preventing national development.

please I beg you, can you create a new topic on this to actually enlighten some of these miscreants that are not well informed but think they are

Vivipop:
Marriage this, marriage that, misplaced priorities everywhere.

The sooner we acknowledge that marriage isn't a do or die affair and most ladies as well as guys now know this, the better for us all.

28 is now the new Old and lonely.
Have a good morning people and quit counting time for people who don't care.

come o madam do u know what you saying, A formal
union, marriage is a social, and legal contract
between two individuals that unites their lives
legally, economically, and emotionally.

Please anybody that wants to get married should try and do that on time o., don't deliberately waste your time only to turn around and blame the innocent society or one old mamma in your village.

Where i live now i have two single ladies in their late 30s and early 40s. These ladies have this attitude of trying to flirt with younger guys and you need to see how the guys make jest of them. It is funny when a matured lady is trying to bring herself down to the level of younger guys, i mean, it can't just work!

So, don't claim you don't want marriage now only to start embarrassing yourself with small boys tomorrow. Let's set our priorities right.

RadicallyBlunt:
Well I don't scorn them. And I think the major cause is d economy.

Unlike before when unemployment wasn't as much as this and the cost of living wasn't expensive, marrying a wife wasn't burdensome. Now, the case is different...a graduate man underemployed for 8yrs after school would always be scared of marriage.

The ladies themselves aren't helping matters. The days of "my husband is financially responsible for all my needs including pants" is gone. Its not about eating up ur Hubby's money again but about adding up to him which they were created to do in d first place...as helpmeets

For example if you're going out together and the journey cost 10k, if he provides 7k, then you as a lady shd help with d remaining 3k. And not expecting him to always drop everything all because he's d man.

In other words, ladies too shd have a job no matter how little and the essence of the job is not to just replenish her purse while she keep saying "its his responsibility to provide not mine"...but rather to support him. The earlier a lady understands this, the better.

Correct

Tearless:
Stop making it seem as though Marriage is a MUST, or that single ladies are unhappy, or that it's all single ladies that WANT to get married. Being single is NOT a problem, so you people need to stop suggesting "solutions" for that and focus on more important things, directing your energy towards more productive ends. I don't see Nuns/Reverend sisters complaining of depression, or divorced single ladies falling dead. You need to snap out of the delusion and false notion that ladies who claim not to need men to make them happy have holes in their hearts. Marriage itself does NOT guarantee happiness, and you need to stop pressuring the single ladies to get married as if being single is some sort of disease. Humans are teleological animals that inhabit a wondrous world of INFINITE potentialities into which they can tap from whichever angle. There's nothing cast in stone, no one way to achieve something. Marriage is not all there is to life. There are other ways of achieving happiness - a lot of them.

Einstein was so in love with Physics that he couldn't invest his sublime passions into any other true love. That was what gave him the kick. That was for him, the bluest meth. Physics was HIS TRUE LOVE that gave him fulfillment, not a person. It was the same for Nietzsche, and a host of other people you can think of.

You're therefore completely WRONG to have asserted, with such impudence, that ladies who claim they do not need
men to be fulfilled are internally scarred. You overhype marriage and worship it like a God. Like that lady, IamKashyBaby rightfully said, MARRIAGE IS NOT FOR EVERYONE.

I wish more Nigerians couldn't think like this really

pocohantas:



Leave that one, maybe he lives in a hole. So, he isn't seeing all the yahoo boys, rape stories, domestic violence, rising infidelity, kidnappers, ritualists, armed robbers, drug abuse by our young men...etc. It's only slay queen they see.

i dont know why they hate that name "slay queen"
May be because ladies nolonger depend on men before they slay and that is what is making them upset.
Shameless people, you become selfmade its an issue, you depend on them you become a gold digger.
i have one married efulefu who has refused to let me be, i refused dating him 3years ago, the imkpi went ahead to marry another sister but will keep preaching to me about being inlove. so why get married to another woman you never loved? dude is in his mid 40's and knows his becoming too old for any lady.
Ladies you see this marriage, dont rush it. one day while slaying you will come across a man who appreciates slayers.
while you are waiting pls be very picky and choosy so you dont end up a victim like tonto, lilian, mercy aigbe and lots more. Marriage is overrated

firstking01:
3 reasons why ladies remain single for a very long time...




At their primes they were too picky/choosy



At their primes they were busy playing hard to get


At their primes they were living in the fantasy of he must be rich, tall and handsome




Funniest part of it all is, most of them end up decieving themselves into remaining single for life...i know of one like that, so, i have no pity for them

Totally false.

Or maybe u using this as a medium to console yourself ah am surprise ooo Marriage is
both a natural institution and a sacred union remember ha me nor understand u ooo,if a man was saying this I won't talk coz there are things u look at,but for a woman ta never,marriage is a most for woman but for men I think they have a choice,I did see anywere in the bible where it was said a lady never got married so it then mean's it a priority to woman,na wa o ah u baffle me oo,woman saying this??hmm

emusmithy:
The Sudden Uprise Of Single Ladies Above 28: Salvaging The Situation.

Hi all.

I'm not the kinda guy who narrates a menace with providing the solution.

I really don't give 'two rats' about the reasons why...

- Maybe she broke the heart of the son of a native doctor.
- Could it be she wasted away her prime years?
- Maybe, just maybe they stuck themselves to one guy with hopes of marriage but were later disappointed.

Look around you, there are everywhere, church, workplace, neighborhood, family etc.

Which is the way forward?

I believe it's high time we called a spade a spade and not an agricultural equipment.

The lashes fall on both genders, appropriately.

Let's observe some measures that can be taken to salvage this urgent matter;
(Forget those ladies forming, 'I don't need a man to feel fulfilled', I'm my own boss. It's deception + boldfacism. There's a scar inside.)

This thread is in Two Sections; Section A and B;

Section A - Guys :

A) Guys should start seeing ladies differently.

The average guy sees ladies as merely a *bleeping object*. With that kinda mental picture, how wan take marry? Ladies are delicate creatures of God to help you fulfil your purpose and theirs too (before feminists crucify me. )
Truth be told, very few of our ladies pose themselves as that object. Very few, I believe. Even at that, Guys, let's see ladies differently. This is a command.


B) Many Guys Don't Know What They Truly Want In A Girl

Why the make-up and break-up? It's all in this quote, "When the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable."

The reason many girls are still single is because guys have refused to propose and that's also because they're still NOT sure if she's the one. If you don't see her marriageable, don't fool her with promises thus chasing other potential suitors, hence overcrowding the 'single ladies world.' I told one lady, I can't promise you I'm gonna marry you. Today, we're still friends. I buy you lunch doesn't mean I love you. Stop arriving at asinine conclusions. Stop reading meanings into my generosity. I'm different.


C) Money and Diamond isn't all a Wife-Material needs.

The saying goes, 'if she's in love with you just because you're rich, she ain't a wife material.'
True ladies abound who want to build a home with you and your 'wretched purse'. Look out for them. Don't generalize that all girls are after the cash. Nada! That's archaic and shameful. There is more to marriage. Don't go for the uneducated girls just because you feel you can't 'afford' the educated and retty model who read Medicine. Why must you think poor before you 'die'? Infact, those other ones are not the solution. Your thinking is.
If I see what I want in any lady, your social status in inconsequential. Highest, you turn me down which all guys are used to, lol. Every setback is a setup for a superfluous comeback.



Section B (Ladies)

A) 'Clock is Ticking' ain't a delusional phrase but an obvious reality.

Many ladies don't really know that there is time for everything. Abeg open Eccl.3:1-13 and read biko. You're 21 and counting how many guys you've 'chopped' and didn't 'chop' you back. That phase of life is very brief. Birthday party after birthday parry and you are already close to 30 and your fleshy flesh ain't as inviting as they used to be. Those guys you friendzoned are now married with kids while you are there confessing, "My time is coming." Hello, wake up and smell the coffee, it's a bit cold now. Stop being repulsive and irritating when guys approach you today. Be nice and courteous. I remember LADY X who happily gave me her number, only for me to call days later and she starts forming, "call me later, I'm busy." I was like, who taught you this did a pretty awful job. So harrowing. Number Deleted, Life goes on!

Ladies, be nice to guys today. It's one of them that might marry you or recommend you to your *superman*. You mustn't stay single till 30 to learn this.


B) Having an inaccurate measurement of a successful spouse.

How do you measure a successful guy? Must he have a car? Good and fine, if he has. That's still not the yardstick.
Was once eyeing a lady when I asked about her, someone told me her REQUIREMENT. I retraced my steps. I'll be there soon, yea. Almost all the guys who asked for her hand are happily married. Do ladies have different privy parts Haba! Ladies, measure success by his dreams, prospect and daily efforts. How many ladies saw greatness in Mark Zuckerberg in Harvard dormitory? Only one gentle-looking, purpose-driven Priscilla Xang. Where were all the 'runs girls'? I'm discouraging the reason ladies wait endlessly for "Mr Right".
They look towards successful failures. They look at liabilities and demean assets. If you want to be a 'mummy' in church tomorrow, marry a pastor. Don't marry a bouncer that you would start dragging to church and forcing him to open a ministry. #yeye


C). "I DON'T CARE" attitude.

Lols, I told her, 'walk like a lady at times na. Not walking like a soldier heading for Sambisa"
She literally interrupted me with, "Any man that doesn't like the way I walk should go to *****." Okay o. I went away also. The truth is, if you don't kinda do the unusual, you might not get the unusual. Step out. Break out. Be rightly positioned. How can a guy love you for who you are? When you can't cook common egusi soup well, you aren't domesticated. You lack manners. On top all, you now joined them feminist- claiming right with you 'olowoorimi'. Who are you and what can you give him that he can't get elsewhere. Eish! He can get s*x outside from younger girls.
Get prepared! I-don't-care might be the reason no one cares about you but keep hurting you emotionally, year in, year out! Change!


Do you know? The world population is about 7.7billion and roughly 22% are young unmarried ladies. That means over 1.5 billion ladies are still single. Don't allow Amarachi do shakara for you jare!

SUMMARY; There are no general reasons why guys and ladies stay so late before choosing someone. Different strokes for different folks. If you have to go spiritual, it's okay. Shiloh 2017 is around the corner again. Meanwhile, make the work easy for God by applying any of these. Good morning.

kudos! You try and I appreciate that..(2:00am !) only the pixs that follows though..
1) This evil mentality that men do not marry ladies of their age mate is worrisome. An average Nigeria man prefer a very younger lady for marriage.
2) The economy of our land also contributed in the sense that most guys are over-aged already before they get headway in life. this predisposed them to late marriage. when they are set for marriage they go for ladies of younger generation because all the ladies of their generation are old.
my take:
to fight this menace,
1) economic must improve
2) men should marry ladies of relatively age mate. 30 years old man marrying to 22years old is uncalled for.

tosyne2much:
Emusmity, this write-up is well researched and articulated

I think the reason why most ladies end up in late marriage is because they live in fantasies and view marriage from a myopic view. That is to say that they screen and discard men for ridiculous reasons in their prime just to satisfy their fantasies.

Another thing that don't make men take them serious is that some of them have nauseating characters and are fond of saying "accept me for who I am". Most of these ladies don't really work on their attitudes but are only concerned about how to bleach, enlarge their butts/bosoms and look better than other ladies. The truth of the matter is that there is no perfect lady anywhere, but any lady who doesn't want to subject herself under the control a man will surely end up chasing men away.

And when they can no longer find men that will take them serious, they automatically become feminists. They become arrogant and will start raining abusive words on men that they are worthless

Feminism isn't as a result of ladies not getting married. It's far from it because today most feminist are what they are because of the way society treats women and that includes married women

IamKashyBaby:


Aha...well, some of us that are still single, simply bcoz we dont go down with all the BS some men will bring on the table...

Some of us are busy chasing our own dreams..dream to be a selfmade woman..

And some of us, juz dont believe in marriage as a true happiness..Marriage is NOT for everyone anyway..

this is great and I sense you really dont believe in marriage.

however, i know a lot of ladies (even guys now) who join this bandwagon without true convictions. A friend asked me and i told him i would be very miserable if i am not married. this is honesty.

guys and ladies be honest with yourselves and ask the question. Will i be ok with being unmarried? If your answer is no (that is marriage will bring you some happiness) then abeg actively work towards it rather than deciving yourselves. indeed there is a clock and this clock exists for both guys and ladies.

Olasco93:
99% of what is stopping guys from marrying most of them is because of their wrong Attitude and Bad Character.
.
Some of them are ruled completely by their emotions 100%, using Make-ups and Fashion to cover their Real sense of reasoning...
.
The painful part is that majority of them this days offer their Puna too quickly... Making themselves too cheap for guys!

Were didn't you get this statistic from because it's false

Nnemuka:
i dont know why they hate that name "slay queen"
May be because ladies no longer depend on men before they slay and that is what is making them upset.
Shameless people, you become selfmade its an issue, you depend on them you become a gold digger.
i have one married efulefu who has refused to let me be, i refused dating him 3years ago, the imkpi went ahead to marry another sister but will keep preaching to me about being inlove. so why get married to another woman you never loved? dude is in his mid 40's and knows his becoming too old for any lady.
Ladies you see this marriage, dont rush it. one day while slaying you will come across a man who appreciates slayers.
while you are waiting pls be very picky and choosy so you dont end up a victim like tonto, lilian, mercy aigbe and lots more. Marriage is overrated

I don't know what some of them want. You carry marriage for head, they will say all Nigerian girls do is marry and breed...you decide to focus on other things, they will still come threaten you with old age.

Is it their old?
Marriage is good when done right.
Everyone should take their time to make that step, that's for those that want to marry. Though in their shallow brain, every single lady is single by circumstance not choice. Look at how they celebrate at failed mariages, blaming the woman for not taking her time...whereas they are here trying to push the single ones into it.

Nigeria's population is syrocketing and our economy is failing, yet people dey try force youth to marry. Where the money?
LOL@ efulefu. Na their way.

selflessmaya:
i love threads like these because while they show me how stupid some nigerians are, some comments also remind me that we have some functional thinking ppl in this country.
the reason while there are more spinsters in this generation is because nigerian women are finally realizing they can do and deserve better. most men here riding the "go and marry" brigade are the worst specimen of men out there. let's be fu<king honest, let's go there, how many nigerians want to have a marriage exactly like their parents? i grew up in a stable household with very nice parents but i can personally say that i dont want a marriage like theirs, a lot of you here talking trash wont even exist in this day and age cos your mothers wouldn't have settled with your fathers. but the differnce is that girls grow up wanting and grooming themselves for a more romantic fun marriage and guys are just more than comfortable being as uninteresting as wet bread.

most nigerians are very bitter when they see a woman who wants to do well for herself, be it a woman who strives for independence and success or a woman who wants to marry well and won't settle for less. that's why they gather like ants when celebrity marriages fail because they love to laugh at those who even had the nerve to think they can have it all and still have their happy ending and i'm using celebrities as an example because they're the only public cases we get to see. this is why successful women like genevieve and rita dominic are constantly told "go and marry" by ppl here who can't even afford 1/10th of the life they live, that's why anytime a scandal arises about adaeze yobo's marriage, they gather around to laugh and say "she never see anything" meanwhile she married at 20 and did not even get the chance to "slay mama" before marrying like most ppl like to justify their dragging with, that is why they drag female celebs who got out of unhappy marriages when they cry on camera, then drag them when they show signs of moving on with their lives. this is why they're happy whenever a new rumor rises about caroline danjuma's husband's cheating, "oh she thought fine girl will save her" "haha shey she's the one that wanted rich husband", this is why they're at the uche jumbo thread typing "ghen ghen" hoping her marriage fails so they can come again to tell women that working hard and being a boss is nahhht the way to go. this is why when an everyday case of domestic violence goes viral, they sympathize but when it's a successful woman who's a celebrity they do the most trying to attribute everything to her celebrity status, she must have been a bad wife (because she's successful in her own right and we all know women who don't need you in order to feed are just terrible and must be dragged)

the issue here is not that many women are not marrying but that many men are NOT marriage material but were raised believing "a man is never ugly" "woman education ends in kitchen" "let boys be boys"and they drank it in whole and did nothing to better themselves and are mad that girls are out here calling their bluff, getting sh!t done and not that bothered about marriage anymore with a "if it happens, it happens, if it doesnt, boo freaking hoo" mindset. basically these men are angry because they cant attract gold while being trash but in the old days of lesser female empowerment a lot of amazing women had to settle for whatever comes their way and these generation of girls are saying NO!!! no more being a maid with glorified title of wife, if men are not ready to be husbands, many girls these days are not ready to sit around wifeing for them and cleaning up after a grown man, whiny like a baby with a head full of entitlement that they dont even possess. many ppl born in the 80s-90s grew up in a world totally different from what it is now and they're refusing to stay stagnant as the times change. women are more practical these days, all the "slay mamas" are hated because girls these days are no more the breed to grow up with an impractical view of how life works, they see the harsh realities surrounding them and they know now that marriage is not a prize but a huge gamble. these men are so angry that women wayyy above them wont reduce their standards and settle for them, so mr man, why dont u reduce your own standard and find girls your own level, it's because mr man was lied to and told that a man is a prize and any girl will give an arm and a leg to have him and reality is just punching holes in the bubble he lives in. women just dont view men as a prize anymore, they view them as human beings and if u can't be the one, they're fine earning their cash, paying their bills and watching whiny threads like these from their comfortable cozy homes, live with it.

ps. lol at the one complaining that girls these days want wedding, pre-wedding pic and reception which is expensive in his opinion and they should settle for court marriage, my friend, when women were marrying a lot like u claim, the same laws applied, you're just broke.

Brilliant! This is "The Final Answer". I'm going to save this post of yours and use it whenever I see these kinds of threads again (with royalty checks in your mail, of course)

Well done you!

Doctorfitz:
A vast majority of them have nauseating attitudes and they'd still stand on their horses claiming rights. It's so appalling, if a woman is marriage worthy my brother she won't be single at all. That's the truth.

Correct but what determines marriage material? Explain with illustrations

IamKashyBaby:


Aha...well, some of us that are still single, simply bcoz we dont go down with all the BS some men will bring on the table...

Some of us are busy chasing our own dreams..dream to be a selfmade woman..

And some of us, juz dont believe in marriage as a true happiness..Marriage is NOT for everyone anyway..

Diary of a heartbroken matured lady.