AmazingM:
Good evening my dear nairalanders. Please I need your honest opinion on this issue because I am very confused now that I don't know what to do.

I have been dating a guy for about three years now. Every thing has been going well. He claims he loves me but he doesn't spend on me. He knows I am still job hunting that I don't have any means of income of my own but he doesn't care at all. How I feed, cloth, recharge my phone, he doesn't know. He doesn't even ask how I cope with all my basic needs as a woman. He doesn't recharge my phone and when I manage to recharge with the little money I have and call him, he won't even reject or ignore the call and call me back knowing well that I don't work. He will make sure he exhausts the little airtime.

It is not as I he doesn't have the money, he has it. In fact he is very comfortable but he doesn't spend on me. I am a type of lady that doesn't know how to ask for money but I expect him to know that since I am not working yet, he should assist me with some of my needs but if I don't ask, he will do nothing.

I am thinking of leaving him because of this attitude I feel he is taking advantage of my nature. Please help me out. I want to know your take on this issue before I take action.

Thank you.

iit's a matter of choice

Divay22:
Just be contented with what you have,live as if he doesn't exist...
I pray you get a job soon...

You have talked like me. I tell my friends this even girls.

Create value for yourself.

AmazingM:
Good evening my dear nairalanders. Please I need your honest opinion on this issue because I am very confused now that I don't know what to do.

I have been dating a guy for about three years now. Every thing has been going well. He claims he loves me but he doesn't spend on me. He knows I am still job hunting that I don't have any means of income of my own but he doesn't care at all. How I feed, cloth, recharge my phone, he doesn't know. He doesn't even ask how I cope with all my basic needs as a woman. He doesn't recharge my phone and when I manage to recharge with the little money I have and call him, he won't even reject or ignore the call and call me back knowing well that I don't work. He will make sure he exhausts the little airtime.

It is not as I he doesn't have the money, he has it. In fact he is very comfortable but he doesn't spend on me. I am a type of lady that doesn't know how to ask for money but I expect him to know that since I am not working yet, he should assist me with some of my needs but if I don't ask, he will do nothing.

I am thinking of leaving him because of this attitude I feel he is taking advantage of my nature. Please help me out. I want to know your take on this issue before I take action.

Thank you.

what have you contributed to his life.? Why are most girls liabilities to men? You are not his wife hence not his responsibility. It's not all about money but what value have you added to his life?

As girls dislike broke guys, guys despise broke girls as well, worst of all liabilities that add no values to them

Adaumunocha:
Marrying a stingy man has it pros and cons.

Adaumunocha hi,relate with me ,let's take it from there biko

kimbraa:
You don't need a soothsayer to tell you he doesn't love you. You're dating yourself in this relationship.






#Sad!.

@ dating yourself in the relationship which is very true

AmazingM:
I didn't pray to be in this condition. That I am broke today doesn't mean I will be broke for ever. There's time for everything and I know that when the time comes, God will take me to where I ought to be financially. Thanks for your contribution and God bless you.

He is not helping you but he is sleeping with you whenever he wants? Hmm

Ifakiland:

You ain't married to him yet, ure still ure parents responsibility...u Shuld be angry at ur parent for been broke not ur bf...relationship isn't a paid job.

As in, these girls cases tire person oo. Until their thinking mentality is changed, girls can do great things, but the mentality to always receive limit their potentials in life. The thirst to be successful and fear of being left behind bring out the best in people

Lawlahdey:
He's testing your resilience

ha! For three years? Iyen Na da

AmazingM:
At least you spend something. He doesn't even spend on me at all.

do you have other people asking you out?

cristianisraeli:


the thing taya me

nigerian girls too like money

once you have money like this..they will be around you like flies

once money go,they go as well

when i see them outside nigeria,i cross to the other side of the road..make them no carry their nigerian package come

i prefer to run things with the local women

hahaaaA

OrestesDante:


From what OP said it's like the guy is not spending at all for her

And you believe the OP

Ifakiland:
All this chew gum gals wey u go spend on them finish them go go marry anoda guy, them go come open mouth say "how much did u spend on me sef?" Na Thunder go fire una...come and collect money from my account na....

Kai. This guy, you wan kee me with laugh, be like girl don do you strong thing before o

tosyne2much:
Don't let anybody fool you or justify stinginess by telling you that you shouldn't be bothered whether he spends a kobo on you or not since he's not married to you.

I mean, how then do you express love when the person that claims to love you is not sensitive to your needs? What kind of a man will watch his lady go stranded when he's financially buoyant to bail her out but will keep claiming that money does not equate love?

Even as a guy, I can't keep friends with a guy who is capable of helping me in times of need but acts like it's none of his business

I will advise you to thread carefully cos love is not expressed with stinginess.. The worst that can ever happen to a lady is to marry a stingy man.

Marry such a man at your own peril

Boss,

The man might be acting it... There abounds many fair-wealther friends - males or females. The experience he had might have changed how he think about 21st-century Nigerian girls which men's love are measured by how much they spend on them. There are many other things the lady should take into cognizance apart from spending on her.

Spending is not a strong determining factor of love...

Adaumunocha:
Marrying a stingy man has it pros and cons.

Nice dp.

Oya explain your post.

is he the only guy after you?are you saying that you dont have other gentle men ready to spend the cash on you , even asking you out ,,,i think you enjoy it? why complain? ladies like bad guys ,,so thats why you dont feel like letting go even with all the caring ,,,,,,,,just my opinion though dont hang me yet.

Slayer2:


He is not helping you but he is sleeping with you whenever he wants? Hmm

Isn't she sleeping with him? If she was the one with the job and he was in her position, will she bear his financial burden.
I do not believe he doesn't spend at all... She probably just wants more

Ifakiland:
Broke ass biitch....u still have the nerves to threaten to break up, please break up fast and move on Abeg.....help his life and move on....mr eazi doesn't have two head....may God never bring a broke gf like u into my life o....#spits#

come on bro. You and your likers are horrible. I am a guy and I know that a girl I don't spend means I don't love her. Simple.

don4real18:

Isn't she sleeping with him? If she was the one with the job and he was in her position, will she bear his financial burden.
I do not believe he doesn't spend at all... She probably just wants more

That's why I always tell my niggaz. Date working class ladies, bankers, nurses, female docs, most of the ladies you see working and living comfortable have no man in their life, you know why? They spent the last years working and didn't really put much into relationship so it didn't pay off for them, now they are single, they need love. Not all these Nigerian girls wey no get job, join this harsh naija economy, you go just turn her father.

jashar:
Concentrate on having a source of income and not bother yourself with what your boyfriend does with his money.


No man you're not married to owes you anything....

But, don't marry someone that isn't caring.

The Most sensible comment i have seen on nairaland.

Divay22:
Just be contented with what you have,live as if he doesn't exist...
I pray you get a job soon...

Are u sure this is ur real face sorry i mean is this ur real self?

It's ok if he doesn't spend on you as long as you guys don't have premarital sex. Anytime he asks for that, remind him to accept you the way you are just as you have accepted that he is Silas Marner. Also, stop performing other widely duties.

Dillusionist:

he will exhaust your airtime but can't do the same for you? ?and he's probably doing all that for another lady
I hate stingy rats occupying space in my life and when it comes to marriage better pick race.

start thinking with your brain intact.

I can see u are only 15

jashar:
Concentrate on having a source of income and not bother yourself with what your boyfriend does with his money.


No man you're not married to owes you anything....

But, don't marry someone that isn't caring.

God bless you. I wish nigerian ladies will understand this

but he dey give u cassava and cucumber

AmazingM:
Good evening my dear nairalanders. Please I need your honest opinion on this issue because I am very confused now that I don't know what to do.

I have been dating a guy for about three years now. Every thing has been going well. He claims he loves me but he doesn't spend on me. He knows I am still job hunting that I don't have any means of income of my own but he doesn't care at all. How I feed, cloth, recharge my phone, he doesn't know. He doesn't even ask how I cope with all my basic needs as a woman. He doesn't recharge my phone and when I manage to recharge with the little money I have and call him, he won't even reject or ignore the call and call me back knowing well that I don't work. He will make sure he exhausts the little airtime.

It is not as I he doesn't have the money, he has it. In fact he is very comfortable but he doesn't spend on me. I am a type of lady that doesn't know how to ask for money but I expect him to know that since I am not working yet, he should assist me with some of my needs but if I don't ask, he will do nothing.

I am thinking of leaving him because of this attitude I feel he taking advantage of my nature. Please help me out. I want to know your take on this issue before I take action.

Thank you.

he taking advantage of my nature. What nature if I may ask

put it in mind that you are not marrying him because of his money.He don't need to buy something as cheap as recharge card and in case he did who will you call with the card,is it him or another friend? But just a minute if the guy is stingy naturally, don't consider him for marriage because you will suffer with your children.Study the guy the way you did to A,B,C and find out if really he is spending on himself,if he owe people debt or people owe him debt,is he the type that doesn't want to pay back his debt? if he is not paying, back, having querrel with people cos of it then the guy must be stingy.Run away from the pending nemesis that may later befalls you in the future.minus money and recharge card has he ever buy you gift or offered good things or an opportunity for your job hunting, helping you to search for one?I mean put something like this into consideration and you will find out his real colours to decide either to run away or not.Pls don't ask money for recharge card from your man.Show him that little affection with the small one you have and do not expect anything in return if you don't want to be considered as cheap and broke because 95% of guys hate buying card for a lady. I am one of the example but I can opt to buy something more expensive and lasting than recharge card..E.g undies like pants, bra,cosmetics and any good clothing material she may desire. Finally, if a guy cannot comfortably do some small stuff for you then you have to be very careful

A lot of young men these days are just trying to Dodge their responsibility, shebi our grand dads and even some of our dads were sole providers, if you check, most of such marriages are still intact.

Young men want women who are not "liabilities" mostly because they want to eat their cake and have it.

I'm all for financial independence as a woman, but be sure you're not dating or planning to marry a man who sees a lottery ticket in you.

Such men will abandon their financial obligations to you after marriage. My aunty dey suffer am now.

You want a woman to submit to you, love you, Cook for you, get pregnant, give birth, raise your kids and yet, you are demanding she shares ur financial obligations with you.

If a woman decides to help out in a marriage financially, its a choice, its not an obligation.

It is the man who is obligated to provide financially.

If the man is not married to you yet, pls look out for signs that he'd be able to take care of you and your kids when you're married.

Its when you're dating or courting that you should be able to enjoy the money and gifts of your partner because marriage is financially demanding.

Love is giving, i ain't saying women should be gold diggers, heck, women make their own money these days, I'm just saying just cause you have your money as a woman doesn't mean you should marry a stingy man.

You'd go broke marrying such a man.

I believe the reason there is a high rate of divorce these days is because women have become financially independent and can walk away from a marriage they are no longer tolerant of.

In the past, because woman no get means of training her kids, she go manage the marriage.

Dillusionist:

he will exhaust your airtime but can't do the same for you? ?and he's probably doing all that for another lady
I hate stingy rats occupying space in my life and when it comes to marriage better pick race.

start thinking with your brain intact.

The OP said boyfriend and you are saying marrige,look for your eyeglass jor,besides which man will be stingy to his wife? the guy may not be as buoyant as she thinks ,it cud be packaging

AmazingM:
Good evening my dear nairalanders. Please I need your honest opinion on this issue because I am very confused now that I don't know what to do.

I have been dating a guy for about three years now. Every thing has been going well. He claims he loves me but he doesn't spend on me. He knows I am still job hunting that I don't have any means of income of my own but he doesn't care at all. How I feed, cloth, recharge my phone, he doesn't know. He doesn't even ask how I cope with all my basic needs as a woman. He doesn't recharge my phone and when I manage to recharge with the little money I have and call him, he won't even reject or ignore the call and call me back knowing well that I don't work. He will make sure he exhausts the little airtime.

It is not as I he doesn't have the money, he has it. In fact he is very comfortable but he doesn't spend on me. I am a type of lady that doesn't know how to ask for money but I expect him to know that since I am not working yet, he should assist me with some of my needs but if I don't ask, he will do nothing.

I am thinking of leaving him because of this attitude I feel he is taking advantage of my nature. Please help me out. I want to know your take on this issue before I take action.

Thank you.

my dear,every man has his own testing method,nd I fall into the category of nt giving a woman money,for me I don't do that because iam stingy but to know her ability to cope with me when iam broke nd her ability to manage situations,most ladies have failed this test,even d one gainfully employed.(thou mine started with a bad experience I had while growing up)a man most times love to marry a lady who love is greater than his.if a lady loves a man more,she will tolerate his short comings ndd d marriage will last till eternity.believe me,most men that do it even d rich re nt. Doing because they re stingy but the ability to knw if u can manage d whealth when u see them,cos if money doesn't thrill u,when u see plenty of it,it won't still change u or ur personality.am nt saying for sure that he is testing u but thatz what happens in most cases.the girl iam dating currently,i don't give her money,neither is she gainfully employed yet.still job hunting.but I don't spend on her either,i jst do it once in a blue moon.nd it's jst little ones I do.nd she have proved beyond reasonable doubt that she is a wonderful creature.iam gonna propose to her very soon.i promised myself that am gonna buy her a car on the wedding day.like I said,most guys do it but must have their reasons like I have mine,nd d few guys I encountered have d same mentality as I do.

public class RELEVANCE
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Run for ur dear life nne.Even if he marries u,he's not gonna change

OrestesDante:

Women! Firstly, Money.
secondly, money.
Third money.



Finally, money!

Well he might be testing you. Or might be a

mostly this shits happening within Nigeria lady's a lots all there life is moment money money