OKOATA:
me and that BF met in sec school, went to the same UNI, lived in the same house and knows my family. We shared things together. I have moved on. I never let an heart break hurt me no more.

Hmmmm.. This is deep.
Was actually telling my aunt this evening that it's someone who knows you that can actually kill you without flinching(this saying depicts what your bf just did to you)
I'm glad you've moved on.. There's no need holding unto those that ain't worth it.

Vincent88:

Thanks i will tell my wife but im not sure when is the right time to speak with her maybe early morning or very late at night i just dont know and i hope she will not leave me after hearing this

no time is good no time is bad. the most important thing is you create the right atmosphere and ambience for this.
truth is this is difficult, I will confess but it is the simples and best way out.
the most important thing here is the truth and genuineness of heart and make them realize this.

This is deep. May we never find ourselves in terrible situations.

You owe it to your brother and your wife to report yourself.

Your Brother might kill you, though.

I'll suggest you rather tell non of them. since you claimed you weren't interested in having the child stays with you, it would be better if you keep it a secret.
as for your brother ; he might still forgive you been his bro but can never regain your trust.
he's been through a lot already and revealing this to him might destabilize and get him depress which is worse.
its easy to forgive but not forget.
i have a similar issue sometime a go despite how much I love the person
he didn't even know that I was already aware of the stuff
but for peace to reign and for the family not to scatter I just hold my peace by keeping mute
it remains a top secret between both of them
non of them knew i was aware i just pretended as if nothing happened though both parties later retrace their steps.
if not for the fact that I was able to keep mute and pretend as if nothing happened family go don' scatter
it will now be;if I had known I would have kept it a secret
later on people would blame you that why did you say it despite knowing his present condition

some things are rather left unsaid. that's my precious advice.
you want to put him in more pains all because you want to be conscience free.
its not as easy as you think.
you just have to live with it
bro
pls try and take care of him
don't let him go into depression

You are in a very tricky situation but my advise to you is this, i believe you have genuinely repented of this evil. If a catholic please go confess to your priest and get spiritual restitution for your wrong. Now once this is spiritually settled, i do not see the need for you to confess to your brother and wife. One, you have already seen how he is unable to handle the break of trust from a once trusted partner, think of what such will do to him from a blood, i assure you he might breakdown and eventually commit suicide but not before telling everyone especially his kids how you betrayed him and you will be shocked even the one u believe is your child might hate you for life and that's how generational seed of discord is sown cos your children will grow to inherit the bitterness for you. As for your wife, this happened way into your past and once she hears this, be rest assured the whole family will hear it and the love and bond will forever be broken. Like someone advised earlier, take ur wife to the hospital when next she is pregnant, most ladies with such history always have similar cause and the solution is always a simple surgical procedure where i think the passage to the uterus is reduced so the baby can comfortably stay and develop. May God help you

Modupetemmy1:
I'll suggest you rather tell non of them. since you claimed you weren't interested in having the child stays with you, it would be better if you keep it a secret.
as for your brother ; he might still forgive you been his bro but can never regain your trust.
he's been through a lot already and revealing this to him might destabilize and get him depress which is worse.
its easy to forgive but not forget.
i have a similar issue sometime a go despite how much I love the person
he didn't even know that I was already aware of the stuff
but for peace to reign and for the family not to scatter I just hold my peace by keeping mute
it remains a top secret between both of them
non of them knew i was aware i just pretended as if nothing happened though both parties later retrace their steps.
if not for the fact that I was able to keep mute and pretend as if nothing happened family go don' scatter
it will now be;if I had known I would have kept it a secret
later on people would blame you that why did you say it despite knowing his present condition

some things are rather left unsaid. that's my precious advice.
you want to put him in more pains all because you want to be conscience free.
its not as easy as you think.
you just have to live with it
bro
pls try and take care of him
don't let him go into depression

My guy sincerely, listen to what this woman has said above.
Reasons:
1. Your relationship with your brother will never remain the same even if he forgives you. You stand the chance of losing your only brother who is around you, the other is in dubai.
2. You do not want your daughter back, so! let sleeping dogs lie
3. With the present state your brother is, he most likely will kill himself
4. You spoke of Conscience; take it as a punishment for what you did and find peace with God.
5. Your wife accepted your daughter as your brother's child, your wife might not be so nice to her knowing she is your daughter. The attitude of an average Nigerian woman.
6. What you did might not be the cause of your wife miscarriage. like someone suggested on the trend, go to the hospital, it could be the issue of Rhesus.

Know that the overall decision lies with you, but how will you feel if, all I have listed above happens after confessing to your brother? You chances of been forgiven are very slim, and chances of worsen your brothers condition are high.

Open up to your wife! As long as that child is yours your wife needs and must to know. Then you both should pray fervently in togetherness that you won't loose another child. That's the first step!
The second step is more tasking! Concerning this, you should involve a respected elder who can conveniently talk to your brother on your behalf! You both will go and seek the forgiveness of your brother. There's nothing hidden that won't be shown to light, whether here in this life or hereafter after death, so it's better you let your brother know now so you can gain his forgiveness and God's mercy can shine upon you and your wife and she will conceive and bear you a child safely!!! You've wronged your brother, you need his forgiveness, go and get it! God is giving you a chance to do so, and thats the reason for your wife's predicament, don't hesitate, don't tarry long, may you find God's favor in the face of your brother. Grace!!

Tosinex:
Open up to your wife! As long as that child is yours your wife needs and must to know. Then you both should pray fervently in togetherness that you won't loose another child. That's the first step!
The second step is more tasking! Concerning this, you should involve a respected elder who can conveniently talk to your brother on your behalf! You both will go and seek the forgiveness of your brother. There's nothing hidden that won't be shown to light, whether here in this life or hereafter after death, so it's better you let your brother know now so you can gain his forgiveness and God's mercy can shine upon you and your wife and she will conceive and bear you a child safely!!! You've wronged your brother, you need his forgiveness, go and get it! God is giving you a chance to do so, and thats the reason for your wife's predicament, don't hesitate, don't tarry long, may you find God's favor in the face of your brother. Grace!!

Thanks for the advice i really appreciate it and i will do as u said

Kerosene:



My guy sincerely, listen to what this woman has said above.
Reasons:
1. Your relationship with your brother will never remain the same even if he forgives you. You stand the chance of losing your only brother who is around you, the other is in dubai.
2. You do not want your daughter back, so! let sleeping dogs lie
3. With the present state your brother is, he most likely will kill himself
4. You spoke of Conscience; take it as a punishment for what you did and find peace with God.
5. Your wife accepted your daughter as your brother's child, your wife might not be so nice to her knowing she is your daughter. The attitude of an average Nigerian woman.
6. What you did might not be the cause of your wife miscarriage. like someone suggested on the trend, go to the hospital, it could be the issue of Rhesus.

Know that the overall decision lies with you, but how will you feel if, all I have listed above happens after confessing to your brother? You chances of been forgiven are very slim, and chances of worsen your brothers condition are high.

Thank you

kross01:
You are in a very tricky situation but my advise to you is this, i believe you have genuinely repented of this evil. If a catholic please go confess to your priest and get spiritual restitution for your wrong. Now once this is spiritually settled, i do not see the need for you to confess to your brother and wife. One, you have already seen how he is unable to handle the break of trust from a once trusted partner, think of what such will do to him from a blood, i assure you he might breakdown and eventually commit suicide but not before telling everyone especially his kids how you betrayed him and you will be shocked even the one u believe is your child might hate you for life and that's how generational seed of discord is sown cos your children will grow to inherit the bitterness for you. As for your wife, this happened way into your past and once she hears this, be rest assured the whole family will hear it and the love and bond will forever be broken. Like someone advised earlier, take ur wife to the hospital when next she is pregnant, most ladies with such history always have similar cause and the solution is always a simple surgical procedure where i think the passage to the uterus is reduced so the baby can comfortably stay and develop. May God help you

Thank you so much for the advice i really appreciate it

I will advise you use wisdom to handle this issue not emotions. Some things are better left unsaid, some secrets are meant to die with you. Your brothers and wife knowing about this will cause more harm than good. Your brother may not recover from the shock, he's already a shattered man.

I advise you seek alternative penance for your sin.Go and meet a mature Catholic Priest and confess for your peace of mind (even though you may not be a Catholic, my reason is that Catholic priests are more balanced in reasoning).Use WISDOM.
Shalom..

IAMBlesssed:
I will advise you use wisdom to handle this issue not emotions. Some things are better left unsaid, some secrets are meant to die with you. Your brothers and wife knowing about this will cause more harm than good. Your brother may not recover from the shock, he's already a shattered man.

I advise you seek alternative penance for your sin.Go and meet a mature Catholic Priest and confess for your peace of mind (even though you may not be a Catholic, my reason is that Catholic priests are more balanced in reasoning).Use WISDOM.
Shalom..

Thank you im not catholic but i will do as you said , there is a catholic church not far from my workplace i will visit it tommorow after work to get more information .

IAMBlesssed:
I will advise you use wisdom to handle this issue not emotions. Some things are better left unsaid, some secrets are meant to die with you. Your brothers and wife knowing about this will cause more harm than good. Your brother may not recover from the shock, he's already a shattered man.

I advise you seek alternative penance for your sin.Go and meet a mature Catholic Priest and confess for your peace of mind (even though you may not be a Catholic, my reason is that Catholic priests are more balanced in reasoning).Use WISDOM.
Shalom..

you made a lot of sense in the first paragraph,but i stopped reading when you started talking about the whole God bullshit

Vincent88:

We have been to many good hospitals and she is very okey in herslef and the doctors cannot find the exact cause of her miscarriage all they been saying she is fine which is true because she get pregnant easily but it doesnt stays. It is like a spiritual things . Thank you

I'm also not English speaker. So If I'm misunderstanding, I'm sorry.
Is that not Recurrent Pregnancy losses or Intrauterine Growth Restriction(IUGR) ?
That is can get pregnant. But keep a baby is little bit difficult. Need assist from doctor when get pregnant.

nwanneniressure:
you made a lot of sense in the first paragraph,but i stopped reading when you started talking about the whole God bullshit

nigerians Christians scream God the most but commit the most hideous crimes.

peacefull:


I'm also not English speaker. So If I'm misunderstanding, I'm sorry.
Is that not Recurrent Pregnancy losses or Intrauterine Growth Restriction(IUGR) ?
That is can get pregnant. But keep a baby is little bit difficult. Need assist from doctor when get pregnant.

We have done all the test to find out the exact cause but all the results came back clear with no causes found which it is strange and worrying.

Vincent88:

We have done all the test to find out the exact cause but all the results came back clear with no causes found which it is strange and worrying.

Ok.
I'm sorry for If I'm rude to you and made you feel bad asked you about that.
I really hope you and your wife will have kids soon in safe.

peacefull:


Ok.
I'm sorry for If I'm rude to you and made you feel bad asked you about that.
I really hope you and your wife will have kids soon in safe.

Please dont apologise i did not take your comment as rude , i was just informing you about the tests we have we were expecting for a result so we can find solution to her problem but with everything coming clear it makes things more stressful. Thank you so much hopefully God will remember us this year and blessed us with triplets

Indomie story

TOO MUCH SICK FOLKS IN NAIRALAND


SAI BABA BUHARI

Look at this one.
In this day and age when I want to have fun with my friend’s baby mama you’re typing rubbish.
Na you know.
Sort your issue.

abeg carry your family matter comonth from here

Vincent88:
Hello everyone im new to this forum this is my fidst post.

Please pardon my english it is not fluent because im french speaken but im married to your nigerian sister (my wife).

Im vincent by name 30 years old married for 2 years with no child yet. I come from a family of 3 brothers and im the last born. Our dad passed away 20 years ago so it was our mom took care of us she fought so hard for us to have a better life unfortunatly she also passed away 13 years ago i was only 17 , my senior brother, our first born was married with a son 4 years old at that time, my middle brother was studying at the university and i went to stay with my elder brother.

His wife started seducing me anytime my brother is away in a business trips , she will try all her power but i was rejecting her by reminding her that she is my brother wife i will never deceiving him by sleeping with her and she started maltreating me by no giving me foods and giving me lots of housework to do, i never disrespected her and i will do as she said.

I was scared to tell my brother because he is a short tempered man he had so much love for his wife and he wouldnt even believe me. So she carry on with her mission after 2 years later i was just 19 years old she was 27 i gave in by sleeping with her (worst mistake ever) we started doing it lots of times when my brother is away on business or when the son is at school. She was then pregnant by me i have begged her to abort it but she went ahead with the pregnancy , all my brother knew that he was the father and she had a baby girl who is my carbon copy but people cant see it because they will always says she is looking like me but no one had suspect that she is mine even my brother.

After the baby i could not continue sleeping with her she was angry at me , threatened me that she will send me to prìson but i made my mind no to do it again so after 2 years of supporting her madness i had enough that made me leave the house for goods i went to stay with a friend and i was still in good relationship with my brother even he try to find out what was my reason for leaving the house. Imade up some lies he accepted it.

So he and his wife had 2 more children that makes them four 2 boys and 2 girls but he caught her with another man on their matrimonial bed and he went for DNA for their last child because she is very fair like a mixed race compare to her other siblings who are dark skin and the result come up that he was not the biological father so he divorce her but kept the child because he love the child


After the divorce my brother's life is not the same how it used to be , he is broke and he is a alcoholic and womaniser , i have given him money several times to start business but he still spending the money on women and alcohol. I stop giving him money but i do provide foods and school fees for all 4 children.

My problem is that since i got married my wife had three miscarriages, by 4 months she will loose the pregnancy it really broke her hearts and im in so much pain too but i believed that im being punished for having a child with my ex sister in law and my poor wife is paying for something she never did.

I love her so much and i dont want to loose her . No one else knows about this is only me and ex sister in law who knows about this. I really want to Confess and be free but i dont know how to tell this to my wife and brother . My wife adore my brother's child, they spend holidays in our house and my brother has never question the other 3 DNA because he has a strong believe that they are all his except the youngest girl. My daughter, she is now 10 years .

Please advice me on how to bring this matter to him please no insult i regrets my mistake i sometime wish it was a dream . Sorry for the long post

Dear brother, it was good you had shared your problem, at least any other person who is in your situation can find a solution. First of all, I'll say your elder brother needs prayers and perhaps in worldly terms a rehab, but prayers to God is very very very important.
Then when that's done, you tell your wife, she has the right to know. Make her understand, she loves you and you love her. If you do this the burden or perhaps the bondage from the devil would be loosed. Then you guys can pray to God and I assure you, you'll have your child.
Then lastly, when your brother is recovered tell him also, he also has the right to know and tell him it's all our children and he can keep them, but you had just wanted confessing to him. Then pray pray to God for forgiveness.
When you follow all this. God would tell the devil to GET OUT from your life that his now the boss of your life.
God bless you as you begin your new life of glory.

Vincent88:

Thanks i will tell my wife but im not sure when is the right time to speak with her maybe early morning or very late at night i just dont know and i hope she will not leave me after hearing this

Ehm if I may ask?? how are you sure the child is yours??

U need Christ

SEGLIZ:

no time is good no time is bad. the most important thing is you create the right atmosphere and ambience for this.
truth is this is difficult, I will confess but it is the simples and best way out.
the most important thing here is the truth and genuineness of heart and make them realize this.

I pity you...somebody is telling you to talk out,and you thought it's a great idea?
you think that your brother will actually forgive you?
your life and your family will never be the same again, damaged relationship forever..u don't know the mind of a man is so deep..
apart from that dna has proved he is not the owner of one child and you want to bring another huge heanrtbreak for him? goodluck with that ooo.
better keep this a secret for life and accept it as your own cross and burden...

U need Christ

Vincent88:
Hello everyone im new to this forum this is my fidst post.

Please pardon my english it is not fluent because im french speaken but im married to your nigerian sister (my wife).

Im vincent by name 30 years old married for 2 years with no child yet. I come from a family of 3 brothers and im the last born. Our dad passed away 20 years ago so it was our mom took care of us she fought so hard for us to have a better life unfortunatly she also passed away 13 years ago i was only 17 , my senior brother, our first born was married with a son 4 years old at that time, my middle brother was studying at the university and i went to stay with my elder brother.

His wife started seducing me anytime my brother is away in a business trips , she will try all her power but i was rejecting her by reminding her that she is my brother wife i will never deceiving him by sleeping with her and she started maltreating me by no giving me foods and giving me lots of housework to do, i never disrespected her and i will do as she said.

I was scared to tell my brother because he is a short tempered man he had so much love for his wife and he wouldnt even believe me. So she carry on with her mission after 2 years later i was just 19 years old she was 27 i gave in by sleeping with her (worst mistake ever) we started doing it lots of times when my brother is away on business or when the son is at school. She was then pregnant by me i have begged her to abort it but she went ahead with the pregnancy , all my brother knew that he was the father and she had a baby girl who is my carbon copy but people cant see it because they will always says she is looking like me but no one had suspect that she is mine even my brother.

After the baby i could not continue sleeping with her she was angry at me , threatened me that she will send me to prìson but i made my mind no to do it again so after 2 years of supporting her madness i had enough that made me leave the house for goods i went to stay with a friend and i was still in good relationship with my brother even he try to find out what was my reason for leaving the house. Imade up some lies he accepted it.

So he and his wife had 2 more children that makes them four 2 boys and 2 girls but he caught her with another man on their matrimonial bed and he went for DNA for their last child because she is very fair like a mixed race compare to her other siblings who are dark skin and the result come up that he was not the biological father so he divorce her but kept the child because he love the child


After the divorce my brother's life is not the same how it used to be , he is broke and he is a alcoholic and womaniser , i have given him money several times to start business but he still spending the money on women and alcohol. I stop giving him money but i do provide foods and school fees for all 4 children.

My problem is that since i got married my wife had three miscarriages, by 4 months she will loose the pregnancy it really broke her hearts and im in so much pain too but i believed that im being punished for having a child with my ex sister in law and my poor wife is paying for something she never did.

I love her so much and i dont want to loose her . No one else knows about this is only me and ex sister in law who knows about this. I really want to Confess and be free but i dont know how to tell this to my wife and brother . My wife adore my brother's child, they spend holidays in our house and my brother has never question the other 3 DNA because he has a strong believe that they are all his except the youngest girl. My daughter, she is now 10 years .

Please advice me on how to bring this matter to him please no insult i regrets my mistake i sometime wish it was a dream . Sorry for the long post

Oga That's your Problem oh.
Nobody Gives a Fvck!

SEGLIZ:

no time is good no time is bad. the most important thing is you create the right atmosphere and ambience for this.
truth is this is difficult, I will confess but it is the simples and best way out.
the most important thing here is the truth and genuineness of heart and make them realize this.

look at this one ooo...what sort of advise is this?
easier said than done!

Marriage is scary single 4 life