₦airaland Forum

daddytime:
Bursting your bubble niccur...

You need a lot to impress papas like us who abound here...

Stupid boy.

You'll get on front page to understand how far.

Ewu

sirdouglas:
You don't want to be mention yet you commented knowing fully well that I reply both to insult and advice.
You are funny. Really funny.

Now read through your comment and tell what you said a person in my shoe should do??

You said nothing but insult me but afraid to be mentioned. That's guilty conscience dear.

I don't have anything to say to you anyway. The decision is mine at the end of the day and whatever comes out of it is mine to bear.

grossintel:
Bro, I won't insult you. But what you're doing to that girl is very wicked and inhuman. Before you enter any relationship, I repeat, look very well and observe the lady first! Take her out, spend sometime talking to her, while she's talking observe how she speaks, her sense of reasoning, ask her intelligent questions, I didn't say you should conduct an interview but be reasonable. You're doing this to cause you need to know if this person is good enough for you.

You turned that kid to a sex mate, because she's inexperienced, young and vulnerable! Now you get her pregnant and forming you don't want to marry out of pitty, who are you leaving her for! You dey Yankee now, so the naija hustling guys can marry the girl you wrecked her pvssy while you chop thight oyibo there?

Guy you're very insensitive and selfish and very proud! Go and claim your property, if you want her to speak well invest in her education. She sounds like a homely girl that can do anything to please you, she can learn to be the best of herself but only if you give her a chance.

sirdouglas:
You don't want to be mention yet you commented knowing fully well that I reply both to insult and advice.
You are funny. Really funny.

Now read through your comment and tell what you said a person in my shoe should do??

You said nothing but insult me but afraid to be mentioned. That's guilty conscience dear.

I don't have anything to say to you anyway. The decision is mine at the end of the day and whatever comes out of it is mine to bear.

Phenomenal16:
...excuse me ..how old were u when u started sleeping with her?..like old ...my mind tells me that u should be in ur 30s..or late 20s....
U should av gotten am matured lady n leave her In peace like u said.
That gal was carried away by euphoria of love...
After scattering someboris life n future ..u r still contemplating on marrying her
If am in her shoes ..I will collect ur child support... Eat clean mouth,,go back to school ....work on my self .....and poison the hearts of those kids against... Shebi u smart

sirdouglas:

You mean I should keep paying child support if the child is not mine??

After all I have spent already and the abuse I have passed through? It's better be a joke.

Just imagine the kind of nonsense that is coming out of some worthless fools here to imagine the feeling when it was all over the place that I impregnated a girl. It can't be for nothing or hell will let loose. That's more or less character assassination. I don't want to talk about the emotional trauma.

sirdouglas:
Of course there is. And I stated some and also gave reason why I don't think it's best for me to marry her.

sirdouglas:
I appreciate the constructive criticism though all you said is not how it happened or the intention behind it but it's all good. That's why I am here. I need to know where exactly I am getting it wrong and the way forward.

sirdouglas:
What if I had given her money to do abortion or helped her with it and travel then few years down the line she couldn't conceive or complications from tje abortion claims her life later. Will it be better?? With the kind of condenmination that I am getting from my fellow guys, now I understand why others always choose the easy way out. I hope you know accepting this pregnancy has cost me a great deal? Financially, emotionally, socially and every f*cking part of my being?

Why I don't want to marry from Anambra? I have some personal reasons for that. I didn't just wake up one morning and made that decision.

Keep your mouth lashing to youself. I know your life is perfect but allow me to sort mine in peace. I am not begging for money remember. And don't for a minute that you are more civilized than me. Sh*t do happen and you are suppose to understand that.

If you can't. Mpa nyem efe dia.

sirdouglas:

You mean I should keep paying child support if the child is not mine??

After all I have spent already and the abuse I have passed through? It's better be a joke.

Just imagine the kind of nonsense that is coming out of some worthless fools here to imagine the feeling when it was all over the place that I impregnated a girl. It can't be for nothing or hell will let loose. That's more or less character assassination. I don't want to talk about the emotional trauma.

AstroG:
What's you point now??

sisisioge:
Hmmm...No to paying child support if you aren't the father but yes to helping her with cash every now and then for contributing to her stupidityyy. The onus of responsibility is on you as you ought to have:

1. Completely let her go without continually forrrrking her each time she purported came back to you, after you decision about not marrying her.

2. Even where your flesh was to weak @ 1 above, you should have wore CDs. Those tiny rubbers used to prevent pregnancies/STDs. You didn't...you blissfully enjoyed the whole thing the way most of us love it...don't bounce now vicar!

3. You should have let her aborrrt the pregnancy when she wanted to knowing fully well that you won't help bring up the child(ren). Oga, the sanctimonious thought of not being a murderer will not raise a child, you know? Since you helped her made decision keep it, dont bail on her biko.


Now baby is almost here...you guys are in it together fa. That's the right thing to do even if its not yours...help her clean up the mess biko. How much more if it is yours. Imagine if she were your sister , daughter or even you!

To all gullible/sensible girls out there...always remember that your body is yours to carry alone and pregnancy decisions should be made with very clear terms as they grow in your body. Cheers.

sirdouglas:


You see how offended you are?? I haven't started yet. I am just judging based on what you said. Maybe if you give me an insight about what you did to the girl you impregnated at 14 maybe It can help me figure out this.

This is to tell how much of a hypocrite you are. Tell the world how you handled the baby a perverted fellow like you impregnated at the age of 14 that I am still struggling for my junior waec and class position. I am interested and I am sure a lot of people here will like to know.

ImaIma1:
Good thing you are not the op.

Are you expecting me to tell him to marry her or not to marry her?

That decision should be left to him to make. I only painted the picture clearly for him to see how whatever choice he makes will impact on her.

sirdouglas:
In as much as you are trying to be mean. I understand your point. For the record, I am not a boy. I will appreciate if you address me with more respect.

Marrying her will not be such a bad idea but we may not enjoy the marriage. Especially her. She has said it over time that she knows that I don't love her. In as much as that is not entirely true, it is not far from it. She doesn't fit my profile for a wife and that is why I have been trying to end the relationship.

If this is coming from a woman I will understand but coming from a guy makes me want to ask you how old you are. Sorry but that's so insensitive of you and immature.

I never meant ill for her and I have been as reasonable and honest I can be with the situation. Judging me won't solve the problem.
What about a girl that a guy rejected for good three times and told her that he doesn't like her for marriage and she is still insisting and keep coming back? It's a two way thingb ro and I am expecting you to be more reasonable with your replies.

daddytime:
Monkey...you no go fit siddon where my children siddon trust me.

You deceiving and lying son of a gun.

I'diot

You see family wey you fit manipulate and oppress that's why body dey shack you.

Dem suppose rearrange that smelly mouth wey you take utter those rubbish wey you spew to dem after impregnating their daughter.

You go collect believe me.

seanwilliam:
dnt mind the op jare. but sir wetin u do to the pregnant wey u gv person wen u were 14? pls tell me sir so dat i go sabi

victorian:
Na WA o



Such arrogance!

Men like yourself are so horrible!

I wonder what she saw in you anyways.

What a pity. You've ended up messing up her life!

God forbid!!!!!!

Phenomenal16:
How did u expect a 19 yr old to behave ....when I was 19 I behave so childish.... I talk a lot ...but now am now getting matured as the Day passes by
.
U see that girl lacks exposure,,,, just like me the moment I entered sch... My eyes just tear open like their....u won't believe it
No woman is perfect... U can marry an educated woman today and she won't give u Peace of mind...my brother marriage is not a joke.....coach her! Educate her! ..send her back to school shey u get money ...u will be amazed....talking out of experience....
But wait how do u expect a teenager to behave ...like how?
U get mind shaa....for crying out loud she's not yet an adult.....I doubt if she has entered higher institution...

U want a Behind lady? ....get lady for Behind problems

Phenomenal16:
..I kind of pity this gal....cos in few years time to come ...she will regret ever meeting u
By then she must av discovered what u av done to her trmw
U think na only u get future abi.....
I bet as time goes she won't even see any reason to be with u
I pray she doesn't poison the hearts of ur kids
Op u know wat twins Are genetic..... Possibility that they Are u kids are high

daddytime:


Be a good boy...

Anybody wey I tell say...see my pikin or children...dem dey relook me well...

Na God jare

grossintel:
Bro, I won't insult you. But what you're doing to that girl is very wicked and inhuman. Before you enter any relationship, I repeat, look very well and observe the lady first! Take her out, spend sometime talking to her, while she's talking observe how she speaks, her sense of reasoning, ask her intelligent questions, I didn't say you should conduct an interview but be reasonable. You're doing this to cause you need to know if this person is good enough for you.

You turned that kid to a sex mate, because she's inexperienced, young and vulnerable! Now you get her pregnant and forming you don't want to marry out of pitty, who are you leaving her for! You dey Yankee now, so the naija hustling guys can marry the girl you wrecked her pvssy while you chop thight oyibo there?

Guy you're very insensitive and selfish and very proud! Go and claim your property, if you want her to speak well invest in her education. She sounds like a homely girl that can do anything to please you, she can learn to be the best of herself but only if you give her a chance.

nnamdiosu:
Before I even say anything, its amazing to see someone in this times and age, (a guy for that matter), with a strong conscience, sincerity and noble intentions. You really are the real MVP .

Now straight to the matter

1. Forget abt marriage. If you tow that line,it will transform you to a monster. You know why? the reaction of a sincere conscience would haunt you and make you take it out on her. You would loath her, you, and even the baby because you aren't sure its yours.

2. Don't try number 1, again I warn you.

Solution ?
1. When the baby is out , do a DNA test. That's the first thing first. Because in as much as you don't believe its yours, IT COULD STILL BE YOURS. ITS A 50-50. No one knows for sure yet.

2. If its yours, Set her up in a business if you can. Rent an accomdation too her them. Pregnancy doesn't mandate marriage ok?. Mandate her to save constantly because you won't always be available to dish out money that will set her on her toes. From time to time, check them out, get gifts ,ensure you stay in important times in the children's life. Bdays, first days at school etc.get photos and videos as evidences and proof (that's another story I don't want to get to). Pay kids bills or needs. Not necessary hers. You can pay directly into their school account etc. But ensure the mom pays some aspect. Don't foot all, I repeat don't foot all.

3. Set up an account where you pay in something no matter how small for them.
At an age you deem them matured, roll it over to them. In essence keep the kids in your life.


Now, if the kids aren't yours after testing,
1. Laugh out loud
2. Come and inform me here, quote this message and I promise to laugh on your behalf too.it's a promise

3. Give her some funds to set up a biz (optional, you're not mandatated too, but for Gods sake, and mercy for the kids. Cos in that house, they will kill her)

4. Rent a small apartment, even if its one room (optional as before)

5. Be careful.
6. Be careful.
7. Be careful again.

God help and bless you. Amen

daddytime:
Go and sit your nonsense ass down.

Go look for oyibo or slay queen marry, when your eye clear na double knee you go take cry come look for this mgbeke.

You are a cunning, deceptive and self-centered predator who fed fat on the naive girls innocence.

You dey look for people wey wan tell you wetin you want hear to justify your actions.

Nonsense an ingredients.

sirdouglas:
Now before you judge me, I beg you to hear my side of the story.
I said my side of the story cos if she is here, she may not agree with everything I have to say.
This is a lengthy one but I will try to make it as short as possible.
I it is important to note that I am not writing this to be judged or ridiculed. I want matured and reasonable people to help out.

I met this girl in 2017. Can't really remember the month but it should be getting to 2years now. We started dating. As at the time I met her I wasn't struggling, I have my own business and apartment so I wouldn't say she met me when I had nothing. I was a big boy then if I can use that word.
She was just 19 or so then. I am this kind of guy that really really take relationship serious and always looking out to see if things can work out. I don't spend on her, I don't do much for her then. I wanted to see the kind of person she is. She doesn't care or even ask of anything. She might ask for something once in a while but I will pretend I didn't hearw her and to my amazement, she will never talk about it again.
With time I started noticing something about her that I don't like. First is she is really not smart and educated. I noticed that she doesn't have her own say. She listens to gossip and always bore me with what this person said or that person. I really hate that shit.
She is a mama's girl too. Sometimes I wonder if she gives her mom details of our sex life.
She won't sweep the house or do anything for me even while the relationship progressed. I started taking care of her and helping out with her needs. I constantly keep wondering if I can settle down with her but I am always stuck with that question.

I ended the relationship when it was clear to me that I can't live with her. I am an ambitious young man and I am not there yet. I want a woman who will be more than a sex mate. I want someone who can confidently handle my business and manage my home when I am not there. She is to naive to my liking. I am tired trying to build her into the kind of woman I want.

There is only one main reason why I wasn't really hard on her. She was one girl who accepted me from her heart and I know it and I respected that too. I suck when it comes to women and I respect women a lot. You know what they say about guys that respect women. They are mostly single �
She came back few months later. She wasn't ready to let go. Being that I am a loner. My defence wasn't strong enough. We started dating. I got hold of myself and ask her to go again because I couldn't see a future with her and I can't bring myself to be wasting her time.

She wanted to stay, I told her in plain words that I don't want to marry her and that's why I am setting her free.

She left and came back the third time. We had sex and all that but this time I was determined to let her go. I went to a lab for a test with to make sure I didn't infect her with anything because I treated staph before I met her and I was afraid it may still be there or something. To my utmost surprise, she was the one who infected me with gonorrhea. I treated mine and hers and ask her to go.

I noticed that she haven't seen her period and asked her and she confirmed it. She left and came back few weeks later that she is pregnant. She insisted that she wanted to have an abortion but I wasn't interested. I told her to keep the child. Besides, she has been the one telling me that my sperm us not working. I laughed over it. I became afraid that she will try something stupid so I took her to a pharmacist friend of mine to discourage her.

Her mother got to know and ask her to call me. I went with a friend and told her mother everything. I started suspecting that the child might not be mine because I treated her of an infection she possibly contacted from another person. In fact, I was shocked when she confessed about the infection. She said it is the toilet they use at home but I never believed her.

I told her mother that I am not sure about the paternity but however, I will take care of her. I told her family that I don't want to marry her and I have told her that severely.

We had a long discussion that day and I left. I started taking care if her the more. I made sure that I made my stand clear on the matter. I don't want to be a murderer so I got to do what is necessary. She started complaining about abuse from her siblings and war started. They beat her almost all the time and I wanted to take it personal. Shit do happen at times but that is not enough reason to kill their sister.

When all this is happening, I was processing my papers. In fact, I started processing my papers before she got pregnant and she is full aware of that. I took another group of friends to their home to help beg the brothers to stop beating her so they don't kill her and the child.

My visa took time so she was almost due for delivery before I left. I sent money to her account and bought some things I felt she would need even the unnecessary ones and left.

My problem now is that she contacted me few days ago to tell me that the scan said she is having twins now not a boy. I can't explain in details because I don't know but the bottom line is that she is now having a twins. I feel for her like I always do.

I don't want to marry out of pity. I don't want to live a promiscuous life. I don't want to marry this girl honestly and having a twins for me just complicated the matter the more.

She said the doctor said she will be delivering this month. I am thinking of sending my uncle and younger brother to her family house to do the iku aka or whatever that is called so I can lay claims to my kids.

Her family is so messed up that I will never want to do anything with them on a normal day. They are from onitsha in anambra and I swore never to marry from that state. That's one of the reason I kept chasing her away. When I say messed up, I am really not that good with English to find the right word to define how disorganized it is.

I am feeling like a monster already. I need all the help that I can get. I never expected this to happen. I never wanted to complicate her life but here I am in the middle of all this.

Should I marry her out of pity and save her the embarrassment or give her money and make sure she comfortable and go ahead with my life. Honestly I don't know what to do.

sirdouglas:
Now before you judge me, I beg you to hear my side of the story.
I said my side of the story cos if she is here, she may not agree with everything I have to say.
This is a lengthy one but I will try to make it as short as possible.
I it is important to note that I am not writing this to be judged or ridiculed. I want matured and reasonable people to help out.

I met this girl in 2017. Can't really remember the month but it should be getting to 2years now. We started dating. As at the time I met her I wasn't struggling, I have my own business and apartment so I wouldn't say she met me when I had nothing. I was a big boy then if I can use that word.
She was just 19 or so then. I am this kind of guy that really really take relationship serious and always looking out to see if things can work out. I don't spend on her, I don't do much for her then. I wanted to see the kind of person she is. She doesn't care or even ask of anything. She might ask for something once in a while but I will pretend I didn't hearw her and to my amazement, she will never talk about it again.
With time I started noticing something about her that I don't like. First is she is really not smart and educated. I noticed that she doesn't have her own say. She listens to gossip and always bore me with what this person said or that person. I really hate that shit.
She is a mama's girl too. Sometimes I wonder if she gives her mom details of our sex life.
She won't sweep the house or do anything for me even while the relationship progressed. I started taking care of her and helping out with her needs. I constantly keep wondering if I can settle down with her but I am always stuck with that question.

I ended the relationship when it was clear to me that I can't live with her. I am an ambitious young man and I am not there yet. I want a woman who will be more than a sex mate. I want someone who can confidently handle my business and manage my home when I am not there. She is to naive to my liking. I am tired trying to build her into the kind of woman I want.

There is only one main reason why I wasn't really hard on her. She was one girl who accepted me from her heart and I know it and I respected that too. I suck when it comes to women and I respect women a lot. You know what they say about guys that respect women. They are mostly single �
She came back few months later. She wasn't ready to let go. Being that I am a loner. My defence wasn't strong enough. We started dating. I got hold of myself and ask her to go again because I couldn't see a future with her and I can't bring myself to be wasting her time.

She wanted to stay, I told her in plain words that I don't want to marry her and that's why I am setting her free.

She left and came back the third time. We had sex and all that but this time I was determined to let her go. I went to a lab for a test with to make sure I didn't infect her with anything because I treated staph before I met her and I was afraid it may still be there or something. To my utmost surprise, she was the one who infected me with gonorrhea. I treated mine and hers and ask her to go.

I noticed that she haven't seen her period and asked her and she confirmed it. She left and came back few weeks later that she is pregnant. She insisted that she wanted to have an abortion but I wasn't interested. I told her to keep the child. Besides, she has been the one telling me that my sperm us not working. I laughed over it. I became afraid that she will try something stupid so I took her to a pharmacist friend of mine to discourage her.

Her mother got to know and ask her to call me. I went with a friend and told her mother everything. I started suspecting that the child might not be mine because I treated her of an infection she possibly contacted from another person. In fact, I was shocked when she confessed about the infection. She said it is the toilet they use at home but I never believed her.

I told her mother that I am not sure about the paternity but however, I will take care of her. I told her family that I don't want to marry her and I have told her that severely.

We had a long discussion that day and I left. I started taking care if her the more. I made sure that I made my stand clear on the matter. I don't want to be a murderer so I got to do what is necessary. She started complaining about abuse from her siblings and war started. They beat her almost all the time and I wanted to take it personal. Shit do happen at times but that is not enough reason to kill their sister.

When all this is happening, I was processing my papers. In fact, I started processing my papers before she got pregnant and she is full aware of that. I took another group of friends to their home to help beg the brothers to stop beating her so they don't kill her and the child.

My visa took time so she was almost due for delivery before I left. I sent money to her account and bought some things I felt she would need even the unnecessary ones and left.

My problem now is that she contacted me few days ago to tell me that the scan said she is having twins now not a boy. I can't explain in details because I don't know but the bottom line is that she is now having a twins. I feel for her like I always do.

I don't want to marry out of pity. I don't want to live a promiscuous life. I don't want to marry this girl honestly and having a twins for me just complicated the matter the more.

She said the doctor said she will be delivering this month. I am thinking of sending my uncle and younger brother to her family house to do the iku aka or whatever that is called so I can lay claims to my kids.

Her family is so messed up that I will never want to do anything with them on a normal day. They are from onitsha in anambra and I swore never to marry from that state. That's one of the reason I kept chasing her away. When I say messed up, I am really not that good with English to find the right word to define how disorganized it is.

I am feeling like a monster already. I need all the help that I can get. I never expected this to happen. I never wanted to complicate her life but here I am in the middle of all this.

Should I marry her out of pity and save her the embarrassment or give her money and make sure she comfortable and go ahead with my life. Honestly I don't know what to do.