lilwetdick:


since he didnt cosign it, he is free but when they start filling tax together then he is in trouble

lereinter:
Very funny
Who told you you will be the one to pay, did she tell you to pay for her

Maybe your intention is to be collecting money from her

Chicastle:
Bro, my advise, you are lucky if I may ask. white women are not like Nigeria slay queues. Let me tell you how they behave, for example if you invite the girl to come and see you in Naija, believe you me, she won't ask you if you have money to take care of her. She would put her money in her pocket. She would bring money for her accommodation and feeding. That's how they do. Talkess of asking you to come and pay $150k. Hmm lie you won't pay anything. Do you think she wants you to come and help her pay her dept? No! She is just looking for love. They are not like the oloshos here oo.. If you no wan go bro let me know MA get ready

idonhammer:
Run for your life, she is not a woman. He is a fraudstar disguising as a American babe to scam you. Don't even think you have won a jackpot,no American woman will be interested in marrying a jobless Nigerian man in this 2019. Open your eyes, na scam.

byrron:


Sir, he is not in any trouble.
I have been filing joint taxes with my wife for 5 years now and she also has student loan debts.

Student loan debt is not a crime for heaven sake, it is what it is, a loan that is payable and you can reach an agreement on how much you can be paying on a monthly basis.

Ugosample:


You know how we are in naija

we are always suspicious of everything

I won't blame him tho

He is a victim of his environment

I think the OP should tread carefully tho

byrron:


The sad part of it all is when people that have zero knowledge or experiences on these issues goes about making categorical assertions that are false.

lilwetdick:


nobody said student loan was a crime, she is going to study further meaning that he could also be liable to pay for her student loan if he cosign it when they are married together, so she cant just take the loan without his permission, so it means he will be liable to pay this loan for the duration of the loans

also taking student loans during marriage when living in a community property state like Louisiana, Arizona, California, Texas, Washington, Idaho, Nevada, New Mexico, and Wisconsin he his also liable for her debt.

Community property states follow the rule that all assets acquired during the marriage are considered "community property."

Blastedholligan:
There's this sweet Akata I met on fb, we are getting along well and she's thinking we could spend our lives together. She's a single mother of one, older than me with one year and a medical assistant.

Now the problem is, she doesn't really earn too much and she has accumulated alot of loans that could amount to 50k dols and she wants to acquire another to study at the University for 4years, calculating all these could amount to like 150k dols and I've not even talked about my own cos I'll have to sponsor myself through school.

Another issue is that I don't think I'm really ready to settle down cos I really need to hustle and make money to help my family if I eventually travel before marrying and I intend on doing a course here in Nigeria for Digital Marketing to help me secure a nice job.

My problem now is, I'm scared of marrying someone who has acquired these loans cos Las Las na me go still follow pay wetin I no sabi.

Please, I need a clear guide on what I should do cos I don't wanna be selfish here with her by using her to get to the USA, I'm very willing to let go of her if I have very good reasons to.

Pardon my scattered words.

Nemesis0147:
she might be testing your love for her
..all this Yankee women ba

kroger:


I wont advice my enemy Marry Akata.. If you eventually move to the US and marry her u will be responsible for paying all her igbese.. You will work your as.s off to make ends meet. My advice for you is once u got your Visa divert to another state.

byrron:


Sir, not all student or those furthering their education leaves on community properties which is a new dimension you have added to the ongoing conversation.

Yes, each state has their own rules and those rules only applies when you are a habitual defaulter.

Paying an agreed monthly repayment for your student loan does not put anyone in jeopardy.

Remember, you only start paying back student loan once you are done with the program for which the loan was acquired.

byrron:


That's a generalization that is not backed up with facts, just like most foreigners sees all Nigerians as criminals which is also a foolish generalization.

My younger brother is married to an Akata that is Heading the HR department of her organization and my brother that just came here barely 3 years ago has gone all over the world courtesy of his akata wife compared to me that has been here before he came.

There are good and bad people everywhere my brother.

It is most preferable to marry the educated and enlightened one's amongst them though.

lilwetdick:


are you trying to deny the facts that this student loans she has taken will not have an impact on the finances of the family, paying an agreed monthly repayment is still a minus on the income of the family, dont forget they also have mortgage to pay, rent to pay, feeding and the child school fees, this is some real expenses that can basically destroy the family finance and maybe the marriage, what she is looking for, is a man that can help her reduce the burden with his own cash, in a more logical way, that is a bad bargain for marriage, just because, i am not going to pay the loan doesnt mean, i wont support her in paying back the loan.

if he is going to marry her, we shouldnt forget he is a young immigrant and his pay wont be that much,meaning their household income will be less, so lot of financial troubles on the way.

byrron:


Let's not digress by creating imaginary scenarios.
Advising the young man not marry someone simple because the person has a student loan debt is so cynical and that is my whole point.

Marriage is not a scholarship where you abdicate your responsibilities nor a place where you won't shoulder any responsibility.

Once you are married, it is no longer all about you but about the family. He shouldn't even bother himself with a student loan that is not his because he will be actively involved in paying part of the monthly house rent, utility Bill's, providing for family needs or will he be immuned to that too?

In conclusion, marriage is a partnership and if you don't see it from that perspective then you have no business getting married.

If they eventually get married, their are turns of financial obligations that will show up that will definitely be a drain on the family's income and not just student loan of which has nothing to do with him but other family financial responsibilities will definitely be obligatory on him and he can't run away from it.

Iogobenz:

This one never still know whatsup.
You never even reach America you don dey behave like white already.
Don't travel and help your family you hear?stay here dey ask annoying questions.
There are 2 things you can do;
-propose a business to her in oil and gas that has very high yield that she will use to clear her debts and sponsor her education,collect like $30k from her and kupu
Or
-travel to meet her jejely,manage whichever attitude she give you till you fix your immigration status and get small bread of your own,then you bounce.
Don't impregnate her o before child support kill you!
My guy use your upper

RDPMAN:
You think oyinbo women are like the black woman, she doesn't need you to pay her loan, how much do you have, after her course she will get a better paid job and the loan will be removed in her salary ... Common, leave the fucking country.

cheeseballs:
bros i dont get it. She wants you to impregnate her before anything? What are you waiting for, abi she ugly?

lilwetdick:


i am not creating any scenarios but that is the reality of life. [s]marriage starting off on paying off debt is the route to poverty.[/s]

This is blatant falsehood and you keep spewing it.

i personally wont marry a woman with that much debt, are you going to deny the facts that there are women looking for rich men to marry to reduce or pay off their student loans.

This is hypothetical and that is not the subject in discuss.


also how do i try to keep my own financial obligations when i have to support debts i was never involved in the first place.

Once you are married, it becomes obligatory to provide for your family not just about you.

anyway, everyman for himself, whatever the op want is his choice but i forsee lot of problems financially in that marriage.

Sure, everyman for himself and there are no one cap fits all solution.

the only reason she opened up about her loan is because she believes she is doing a favour for the man in respect to bringing him to america and filling up papers for him, all because of the stereotype that Nigerian men are hard working, it is a trap for the man, he is going to work his life to death and nothing to show in his bank account all because of her self-fish interest.

Your opinion but definitely not the reason since you weren't a part of their ongoing conversations which could have led to her talking about it except if you are now possessed with powers to read the minds of people

kroger:


I was refering to the OP particular situation.. The said lady is a medical assistant earning Approximately $15 to $18 an hour, with a kid and debts. I have witnessed scenarios like this, she will so depend on the guy financially. Your brother is a lucky man cos ita rare to find the educated and more financially stable ones.

lilwetdick:


before you read with joy

byrron:

byrron:


Do you realize the fact that this guy will be jobless for a while and will be housed and fed by this same lady in question pending on when he gets a job?

She is paying her Bill's and catering for needs and that of her child even when she is not yet married to our NL brother so are you now saying one's they get married then she will suddenly stop working and become a full blown housewife while transferring all the family financial obligations to a JJC that just landed?

Hell no.

byrron:


That's a generalization that is not backed up with facts, just like most foreigners sees all Nigerians as criminals which is also a foolish generalization.

My younger brother is married to an Akata that is Heading the HR department of her organization and my brother that just came here barely 3 years ago has gone all over the world courtesy of his akata wife compared to me that has been here before he came.

There are good and bad people everywhere my brother.

It is most preferable to marry the educated and enlightened one's amongst them though.

kroger:


Hell yeah.. She will cater for him till he settles down and get a job, once he gets a job gradually she becomes dependent on him. Bro I have been there done that I know how these akata behave. A good friend of mine is in this dilemma..

Ugosample:


yesso

you marry ratchet one

you suffer for it

byrron:


I'm not holding brief for akata and I'm sorry for your experiences but generalization is the issue here.

This attitude is more pronounced when dealing with some of the ones amongst them that feels so entitled but definitely not all of them of which my younger brothers wife is a case study I will always make reference to and the ones that are my colleagues that are married to some Nigerians I know off.

There are exceptions to every situation which is why we can't just generalize simple because of our personal experiences or that of others.

Ugosample:


yesso

you marry ratchet one

you suffer for it

Offpoint:
Some advice people seek online makes me wonder what happens to natural sense...


Let me know who you voted for in the last presidential election, that's the only way I'll know the kinda advice I'll offer.