₦airaland Forum

SingleGuy9999:
Good day guys, I'm not really too active here, but this is a 2nd account I created for this. I am 22 year old student in my final year. But I've never had a girlfriend, also I have never had sex, but that is not the major problem as I can easily get a hooker and pay. I feel I'm pretty good looking, at least average. This would be a little long, pls try to read through.

My problem is I can't seem to get a girlfriend, I have been rejected by girls like 7 times in a row or more...I don't meet that many girls but I do go out and meet sha and if I like a girl and I feel she's someone I can date I ask her out. If we aren't really vibing I just delete their numbers and forget about them. But I keep getting rejected by all the girls I've asked out, they either see me as a friend and tell me stuff like I'm a good friend or they not ready for a relationship or that they feel I have no feelings for them...like wtf

It's really frustrating so much that it's literally killed every confidence I have to ask girls out. Like the last 3 girls I wanted to ask out I ended up not bothering since I know it'll end same way...planned to ask one out today but I just couldn't stand to get rejected again...cos even tho I think what I'm getting might be green light I'm not sure about girls anymore...in fact now I'm no longer sure if the girls I think liked me before ever did (I wasn't interested in them so I didn't ask them out). Even the one who made me lose all hope was after spending so much time with a girl, I was asking her out for 4 months, I never tot I'd ever ask a girl out that long but I was blinded by love...and we spent so much time together, my friends kept wondering if we were dating but she never said yes even tho she said she liked me too but kept giving excuses...and I pretty much abandoned chasing other girls in for that while...but I still got a no at the end with story changed to she tot she liked me but was just trying to as she could see I was in love with her and didn't wanna break my heart...

That killed my confidence, and I'm not blaming her or anyone...now since then I've only asked 2 girls out, and I still got rejected...

I spend time with the girls, we hang out, flirt, chat etc but they would never date me... I've gotten so lonely as I want to date someone I truly care about and I have even questioned if it's possible for 2 people to fall in love with each other out of the billions of people on earth.

I've heard from someone that I play with girls too much so they won't take me seriously, another was that I'm nice (I don't think I'm that "nice guy" cos I won't go extra mile for any girl just cos I like her, but I'm understanding and I think I tend to make excuses for people when they disappoint). And I'm tired of girls seeing me as a friend, or being taken for granted. In fact my best female friend is one who I asked out before.

When I see people dating I wonder if they from another planet, I can't figure out what's wrong...is it that I have no luck with girls? I have gone online, read books etc. They all keep saying same thing...they talk about confidence but I had that...tho right now I just fake it cos all my confidence is gone with numerous rejections. Then I read about working on yourself, I have done that, I may not be anywhere near the freshest guy but at least I'm sure I'm okay. They talk about creating tension and stuff by making contact and I do that, I hold them around the waist etc....

So far I even read that I shouldn't blame myself or stop trying to figure out what went wrong when I face rejections, that's what I'm doing now...but nothing seems to be changing. I rarely spend time with girls again, except some good friends, and instead I've been focusing more on my hobbies cos I now see it as a waste of time when it only ends in rejection. I think of going out with a girl but I just rather sit at home or spend more time with my guys or even spend the money on them cos I'm fed up. The thought even crossed my mind to give up on girls since it never seems to work...I'm not used to multiple failure as even in other stuff I don't fail as much, but I just can't seem to get it to work with girls. Everything seems fine at first and going smoothly but it all ends with rejection.
I don't wanna give up on girls and I know there's nothing left of my confidence when it comes to girls, tho I fake it...and I will never result to insulting girls just cos of my rejection.

Pls I need real advice on what to do, I have exhausted all my options, and today I resolved to never ask any girl out till I'm 99% sure she'll say yes, but is that even possible? I know every guy gets rejected but it's not easy when u get rejected several times in a row by girls you have serious feelings for.

Should I just cut my losses and give up on girls? For months I spent time on other things and never really cared about any girl any longer but now that feeling is back with this new girl but I can't even ask her out cos I can't say for sure what her reply would be... maybe a no as I usually get...

Pls don't insult me or call me names I just need advice that would help

I'm 22.. Was once was like you tho .. Girls are not my problem Sha... My secret?.. Make money, have class, buy new wears, clothes, take care of your facial hair properly, try to grow beards (I have goatee ).. Some girls will think you are a yahoo boy but trust once you let them know who you are and how you earn for a living they will see you as one of those responsible classy young guys they can take home to meet their parent (talking from expirience)...

seriously..... My cheapest shirt is just 1500.. Make money and look classy girls love this

Wow

waywardpikin:
Lol my nigga. Why I like your thread is because of the honesty with which you communicated your pain. We have all been there, even guys that are more capable than James Bond also get rejected, whether they admit it or not.

From what you wrote, everything checks out and I think you're on the right path. But you're making one crucial mistake that is ruining your game and making a waste of all your effort. I don't even work as hard as you to get ladies.

Your mistake - STOP ASKING WOMEN OUT!

Yeah I put it in caps in hope it'll sink in. You say you hold them around the waist and stuff, that is very good. Your next move is to try and kiss her. Focus on being a flirt, go heavy on the jokes, but sometimes switch and let them see a mean side of you you really don't want them to see.

Be like a light switch, on and off, on and off, hot and cold.

I tell you bro, you will just find yourself in several relationships because the women have already started dating you in their minds. Na after the sex she go dey ask you, "What are we?"

Then you can smile and answer her in Michael Jackson's voice that, "We are the woooooorld, we are the childrennnnnnnn."

Also I think you're taking this dating thing a little too seriously which could be a turn off for some women. Have fun, bro. Have lots of fun. You're still young and the world is your oyster.

P.S. Ideally, I'd advise you to stay off women altogether and focus on building yourself but you need the experience. Men without any experience in Womanology get seriously burned sooner or later so go hard, learn your lessons and grow.

Xoxo.

comma make heaven lemme see you.. lol

SingleGuy9999:
Good day guys, I'm not really too active here, but this is a 2nd account I created for this. I am 22 year old student in my final year. But I've never had a girlfriend, also I have never had sex, but that is not the major problem as I can easily get a hooker and pay. I feel I'm pretty good looking, at least average. This would be a little long, pls try to read through.

My problem is I can't seem to get a girlfriend, I have been rejected by girls like 7 times in a row or more...I don't meet that many girls but I do go out and meet sha and if I like a girl and I feel she's someone I can date I ask her out. If we aren't really vibing I just delete their numbers and forget about them. But I keep getting rejected by all the girls I've asked out, they either see me as a friend and tell me stuff like I'm a good friend or they not ready for a relationship or that they feel I have no feelings for them...like wtf

It's really frustrating so much that it's literally killed every confidence I have to ask girls out. Like the last 3 girls I wanted to ask out I ended up not bothering since I know it'll end same way...planned to ask one out today but I just couldn't stand to get rejected again...cos even tho I think what I'm getting might be green light I'm not sure about girls anymore...in fact now I'm no longer sure if the girls I think liked me before ever did (I wasn't interested in them so I didn't ask them out). Even the one who made me lose all hope was after spending so much time with a girl, I was asking her out for 4 months, I never tot I'd ever ask a girl out that long but I was blinded by love...and we spent so much time together, my friends kept wondering if we were dating but she never said yes even tho she said she liked me too but kept giving excuses...and I pretty much abandoned chasing other girls in for that while...but I still got a no at the end with story changed to she tot she liked me but was just trying to as she could see I was in love with her and didn't wanna break my heart...

That killed my confidence, and I'm not blaming her or anyone...now since then I've only asked 2 girls out, and I still got rejected...

I spend time with the girls, we hang out, flirt, chat etc but they would never date me... I've gotten so lonely as I want to date someone I truly care about and I have even questioned if it's possible for 2 people to fall in love with each other out of the billions of people on earth.

I've heard from someone that I play with girls too much so they won't take me seriously, another was that I'm nice (I don't think I'm that "nice guy" cos I won't go extra mile for any girl just cos I like her, but I'm understanding and I think I tend to make excuses for people when they disappoint). And I'm tired of girls seeing me as a friend, or being taken for granted. In fact my best female friend is one who I asked out before.

When I see people dating I wonder if they from another planet, I can't figure out what's wrong...is it that I have no luck with girls? I have gone online, read books etc. They all keep saying same thing...they talk about confidence but I had that...tho right now I just fake it cos all my confidence is gone with numerous rejections. Then I read about working on yourself, I have done that, I may not be anywhere near the freshest guy but at least I'm sure I'm okay. They talk about creating tension and stuff by making contact and I do that, I hold them around the waist etc....

So far I even read that I shouldn't blame myself or stop trying to figure out what went wrong when I face rejections, that's what I'm doing now...but nothing seems to be changing. I rarely spend time with girls again, except some good friends, and instead I've been focusing more on my hobbies cos I now see it as a waste of time when it only ends in rejection. I think of going out with a girl but I just rather sit at home or spend more time with my guys or even spend the money on them cos I'm fed up. The thought even crossed my mind to give up on girls since it never seems to work...I'm not used to multiple failure as even in other stuff I don't fail as much, but I just can't seem to get it to work with girls. Everything seems fine at first and going smoothly but it all ends with rejection.
I don't wanna give up on girls and I know there's nothing left of my confidence when it comes to girls, tho I fake it...and I will never result to insulting girls just cos of my rejection.

Pls I need real advice on what to do, I have exhausted all my options, and today I resolved to never ask any girl out till I'm 99% sure she'll say yes, but is that even possible? I know every guy gets rejected but it's not easy when u get rejected several times in a row by girls you have serious feelings for.

Should I just cut my losses and give up on girls? For months I spent time on other things and never really cared about any girl any longer but now that feeling is back with this new girl but I can't even ask her out cos I can't say for sure what her reply would be... maybe a no as I usually get...

Pls don't insult me or call me names I just need advice that would help

Young man my own outlook will be different from many, I am a trained Astrologer with many years of experience if you would not mind, send your birth details ie, Day, month and year of birth, to crown it all if the time of birth is known, it an added advantage.I will analyze the date then give you reasons why you get rejection from ladies.

Bro, you better hustle and make money first, girls will come naturally after

satowind:
I just found my matter of the heart ❤️.. op stop asking girls out is embarrassing, just get them to ur place try kissing her , the touch her and try to finger her, she will ask u what are u doing , tell her ' u know I like you , I mean like like I'm while still touching her, some will insist on letting u explain , some will ask u after sex , just tell them u like them after 3 times wey una do this nah she go come dey ask u if u wan date her , if u have a gf or not etc. Is not as simple as this oh takes practice. But never read books for naija girls they are from another planet the package u need suppose come from another planet too. Then never verbally ask them to date u especially when u never lamuzia and protozua her womanlies they will tell u they want to be friends.

Guy i Swear na you go dey skul pass. But which one come be "Lamuzia And Protozua"� na

Try and read this ebook MR FRIENDZONE it might be of help

The reverse is the case when it comes to my brother almost all the girls he meet wants a relationship...

Like they keep bugging him.. He is even complaining about it now...

Life is just funny..

MrWTF:
Don't change a thing on your socialization with girls. The only thing you need to change is your Availability.

Never show a girl you are desperate. Always make her feel she's an option.

Never laugh like a jackal where a girl is, she's gonna take you like a pet, which means Best friend.

Always learn to Say No to a girl.


The most of all, flirt with her friends. Let's say you meet her with her friend in a library, say hello to her, then complement her friend's beauty or her hair, trust me, girls can go crazy for this.

Trust me, you don't need a 7 figure bank statement before you could rip her pant and insert your long dick from behind, thrusting her, till she reaches her peak of pleasure.

Damn u are such an animal , I too like u i swear

Jgoldie:
You wrote all this epistle ontop woman matter.....dude get a life,a job and make money.....love is so over rated.....matters of the heart happens when we don't expect it...shalom

Bravo!

That moment you started considering girls rejection as pain - thereby loosing your gut or confidence in the process - that's where you started missing things up for yourself. On your next outing with any girl, learn to be spontaneous and be witty in your flow, don't try to impress her; it's not your duty; and always bear it mind that every girl you meet on a first date, they don't have any iota of feelings for you; so with that, approach a girl with the purpose of friendship ONLY, that's where you'll start taking note how smooth you're when talking to them.. After getting your desired girl(s) as friends; learn to start zoning them, don't pay give attention, form busy and keep making friends with with more girls - that's how boss roll.... They'll take note of your "I no get time" attitude - for they are very sensitive in nature.... That's who they like to roll with.... After you've noticed a girl is craving for your attention, invite her over to your place; before she leaves that day, ensure you kiss her - don't take things farther than kissing. After she leaves, don't put emotions, in fact don't do a follow up by telling her or them that you love them. Their subsequent visits, you're free to get her laid. Follow the flow that creeps up from there... Peace.

bro, finish ur degree, try to make money and everything will take shape as u grow older...

SingleGuy9999:
Good day guys, I'm not really too active here, but this is a 2nd account I created for this. I am 22 year old student in my final year. But I've never had a girlfriend, also I have never had sex, but that is not the major problem as I can easily get a hooker and pay. I feel I'm pretty good looking, at least average. This would be a little long, pls try to read through.

My problem is I can't seem to get a girlfriend, I have been rejected by girls like 7 times in a row or more...I don't meet that many girls but I do go out and meet sha and if I like a girl and I feel she's someone I can date I ask her out. If we aren't really vibing I just delete their numbers and forget about them. But I keep getting rejected by all the girls I've asked out, they either see me as a friend and tell me stuff like I'm a good friend or they not ready for a relationship or that they feel I have no feelings for them...like wtf

It's really frustrating so much that it's literally killed every confidence I have to ask girls out. Like the last 3 girls I wanted to ask out I ended up not bothering since I know it'll end same way...planned to ask one out today but I just couldn't stand to get rejected again...cos even tho I think what I'm getting might be green light I'm not sure about girls anymore...in fact now I'm no longer sure if the girls I think liked me before ever did (I wasn't interested in them so I didn't ask them out). Even the one who made me lose all hope was after spending so much time with a girl, I was asking her out for 4 months, I never tot I'd ever ask a girl out that long but I was blinded by love...and we spent so much time together, my friends kept wondering if we were dating but she never said yes even tho she said she liked me too but kept giving excuses...and I pretty much abandoned chasing other girls in for that while...but I still got a no at the end with story changed to she tot she liked me but was just trying to as she could see I was in love with her and didn't wanna break my heart...

That killed my confidence, and I'm not blaming her or anyone...now since then I've only asked 2 girls out, and I still got rejected...

I spend time with the girls, we hang out, flirt, chat etc but they would never date me... I've gotten so lonely as I want to date someone I truly care about and I have even questioned if it's possible for 2 people to fall in love with each other out of the billions of people on earth.

I've heard from someone that I play with girls too much so they won't take me seriously, another was that I'm nice (I don't think I'm that "nice guy" cos I won't go extra mile for any girl just cos I like her, but I'm understanding and I think I tend to make excuses for people when they disappoint). And I'm tired of girls seeing me as a friend, or being taken for granted. In fact my best female friend is one who I asked out before.

When I see people dating I wonder if they from another planet, I can't figure out what's wrong...is it that I have no luck with girls? I have gone online, read books etc. They all keep saying same thing...they talk about confidence but I had that...tho right now I just fake it cos all my confidence is gone with numerous rejections. Then I read about working on yourself, I have done that, I may not be anywhere near the freshest guy but at least I'm sure I'm okay. They talk about creating tension and stuff by making contact and I do that, I hold them around the waist etc....

So far I even read that I shouldn't blame myself or stop trying to figure out what went wrong when I face rejections, that's what I'm doing now...but nothing seems to be changing. I rarely spend time with girls again, except some good friends, and instead I've been focusing more on my hobbies cos I now see it as a waste of time when it only ends in rejection. I think of going out with a girl but I just rather sit at home or spend more time with my guys or even spend the money on them cos I'm fed up. The thought even crossed my mind to give up on girls since it never seems to work...I'm not used to multiple failure as even in other stuff I don't fail as much, but I just can't seem to get it to work with girls. Everything seems fine at first and going smoothly but it all ends with rejection.
I don't wanna give up on girls and I know there's nothing left of my confidence when it comes to girls, tho I fake it...and I will never result to insulting girls just cos of my rejection.

Pls I need real advice on what to do, I have exhausted all my options, and today I resolved to never ask any girl out till I'm 99% sure she'll say yes, but is that even possible? I know every guy gets rejected but it's not easy when u get rejected several times in a row by girls you have serious feelings for.

Should I just cut my losses and give up on girls? For months I spent time on other things and never really cared about any girl any longer but now that feeling is back with this new girl but I can't even ask her out cos I can't say for sure what her reply would be... maybe a no as I usually get...

Pls don't insult me or call me names I just need advice that would help

Bro plzzzz lets swap cuz me am tired of them already.all wat i need now is money,to blow hard!!!!

SingleGuy9999:
bro... there's nothing wrong in chasing money and wanting to feel loved by a girl you like at least once in my life...
And there's guys who I know are so broke yet they get girls

Thier mouth works for them

Hi buddy, when I read your touching write up, it just reminded me of myself;years ago.
Best advice is to continue to be yourself because that is what would bring you a long lasting relationship.
It is important to start relationships with friendship so you don't overflow the other person emotionally with a long term plan they might not have thought about yet. Remember the person you seek might have other things on their minds like their education, career, family activities whilst not thinking much about relationship with a partner.

The way most ladies think about relationship changes as they grow older, it seems you might be thinking a bit long term.

Now on a personal level, I asked a few 'special' ladies out or at least started a live friendship with some and didn't get the response I wanted but I realised that I became much more comfortable amongst the ladies and had a lot of female friends that I didn't expect anything more than friendship. As it happen the next lady I was interested in happened to be the best friend of one of female friends, my friendship was instrumental to starting a relationship with that special lady.

Now looking back to over 20 years, I have had the opportunity to ask some of the ladies that said no to me about their responses, one said she didn't think I was serious about her, another said I was too nice and felt she was too young to settle down before having 'fun' but my 'special' girl said she just didn't know why she said no.

To summarise build up yourself in every way focus on your future, start a friendship - expect something but not too much and see how things go.
I am now in my 40s married to a beautiful woman whom I lost my virginity to at the age of 29 (the only woman I have slept with) with about 80% of my friends being female and now having cut back on some friendship as you become a magnet once you taken by another woman.

This life funny sha... Some Girls i do asked out don't usually give me positive feedback, same girls I'll invite over to my crib then after bleeping they will be the ones chasing. When i got admitted into the university there was this girl in my department that invited me over to her lodge and she profess her love to me and then asked me to bleep her as per sharp guy na i no dull, Same thing happened btw me and one final year girl. Now am currently in 300l second semester I've bleeped countless girls already that i don't even ask out.

My own Method is i don't ask Em out anymore just try to get close to them,Crack some jokes,Give them a call to ask how dia doing then invite them over and try to get intimate then from there everything will just fall into place.

Girls do tell me that am Cute and they love my sideburns too guess that gives me an added advantage... But I BROKE die!!

Perhaps thou hast the odour of the mouth.

pansophist:
OP, what you are passing through is exactly what most men will surely pass through, its encoded in the sand of time that what makes a man attractive and desired by the opposite sex is about being valuable. Being a man is not valuable, loving her is not valuable, but being a valuable man yourself.

Your value as a man is resource based (social status, wealth, intellects etc), it is the transformation for a boy to a man, that will make men respect you, and women attracted to you. other posters have said it all, and even though it is hard for me to believe that true love doesnt exist, as in, being loved just for being a man, all evidence points towards that direction. The mistake I see men generally do is expecting a woman to love him for who he is. No woman will love you for who you are (just being a man), because unlike men, women's value to men is physical (beauty, youthfulness, femininity), something she is born with and doesnt have to work for, yours as a man is the opposite.

When women say "real men", "man up", "be a man", it is a testament to this fact that being they separate the boy from a man, but have you ever heard men say "woman up", "real woman", ba a woman"?. Look at it this way, when you tell your friends that you met a new girl, their question will be something like, "is she beautiful", "she get yansh", "how does she look"? What all these implies is that women are valued for just being women. I remember when my sister told my parents about her boyfriend and that they wanna get married, what my parents wanna know was, "what does he do", "where does he work", how old is he", questions that reveal if he is not a boy, but a man, with a sense of responsibility, financial capability and able to lead a family.

Another example, most men usually move out from their fathers house to their own apartment, but women move from their father house to their husband house, our culture is deeply buried in this thoughts. Or male musicians showing cars and houses, to signify success (resource base), but female almost getting naked, displaying their curves (beauty/physical base value). Examples abound to prove this dynamics, but you should get the point now. Women are born, men are made. You should "made" yourself, and women will come.

So my young bro, I tell you from a place of experience, that you should focus on building yourself, and the women will come. Forget about all those nollywood true love shit, only women usually fall for it, because they operate in their own frame of being rewarded for being women, and project it on men, thinking they fell in love with you because you are you, not knowing their primal base and evolutionary hardwiring that made them skip others to be with a real man.

Goodluck

Correct narrative that is based on our current cultural values, which may shift as women become more liberal and rich without adequate number of eligible men.
Thanks.

Dizzyrascal:
hmmm! Who knows he might just fall in love with you. Take care of his heart in advance.

sure,I will

U r being too nice n gud.. girls don't fancy that.. treat dem like d b*tches they r n u will b banging a football team every week..

I see a lot of demonic advices here. Discover and fulfill your Destiny first, and see most beautiful kind of girls begging you to marry them. Nigeria is in quagmire, Youths should be focused of getting real solution. The Spiritual conttols the physical, you are supposed to treasure your virginity. There is power in Virginity. As a Virgin, David was not yet 20 when he killed Goliath and solve the Nation probelm. Stop being myopic, sex is not worth losing your great Destiny for.

Having read ur write up, my candid advise to u is u make women/girls ur priority which is pretty wrong..... Have less attention to Girls. Focus on what will enrich ur pocket first cuz 99.9% of girls in recent time like and love money more than anything . They view relationship as job opportunity. Nowadays, is pretty hard to find a genuine love.

Meanwhile, stop looking for love for now cuz u will never find cuz no matter the kind of confidence u are, being a virgin has a way affecting the feeling. just use money to attract them and break ur virginity first. Then, u got to see real confidence in u..... gudluck

please be patient.you're still very young.when you start working girls will start running after you.

i feel u my man! sorry
first of all introduction ehm ehm i mean
stop developin strong feeln b4 u askd em gals out so it wont turn sour wen dey sing d No anthem.
secondusly , stop askn dem, show dem...aswel as confidence, u need boldness (u'l stil av2ask at som point Oo, dnt geh me wrong lol).
Now, i dunno reasn for which dem dey reject u buh work on ur appearance, look gud n sharp. ee b lyk say daht go giv u upper ands
dat is my 10kobo
gudluck

Make some money and you would rule

Reading this epistle, i can envisage you must have painstakingly pen it down.
So!....I think to love is a beautiful thing really, and to be loved in return **superb right?
But then, i can sense desperacy, like you know, don't be so desperate, the right person will come, it starts slowly and afterwards steady
P.S Friendship is key, what are your prospects?, what do you guys discuss about, **short-term, long-term, etc Your level of seriousness, maturity, sincerity, also are crucial...

BUY THE ACT OF SEDUCTION AND READ

MrWTF:
Don't change a thing on your socialization with girls. The only thing you need to change is your Availability.

Never show a girl you are desperate. Always make her feel she's an option.

Never laugh like a jackal where a girl is, she's gonna take you like a pet, which means Best friend.

Always learn to Say No to a girl.

The most of all, flirt with her friends. Let's say you meet her with her friend in a library, say hello to her, then complement her friend's beauty or her hair, trust me, girls can go crazy for this.

Trust me, you don't need a 7 figure bank statement before you could rip her pant and insert your long dick from behind, thrusting her, till she reaches her peak of pleasure.

This guy issa bad guy like me

OmoAlata1:
Lol

u really mature sha,
if na some other females u go see insult throwback

Kingsuave:
Guy i Swear na you go dey skul pass. But which one come be "Lamuzia And Protozua"� na

baba nah washing of pipe oh, i mean isa pipe

micflo28:
Youngman, you don't need harem of women to feel less lonely, Make yourself soooo happy to green envy of the ladies that they will wanna be part of what gives you so much joy. Dress very well and stylishly, walk shoulder high, use very good perfumes, read books that will help you to speak eloquently. Ladies love men who are happy with themselves first. Don't be boring around them, don't be always available to loose your value. choose your ladies, don't let them choose or fall for just any lady. Be confident, grow some beards and go out more often.

so how do you magically expect him to grow some beards?