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Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. - Family (8) - Nairaland

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When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. / Boy's Converstaion With His 'Deadbeat' Dad About Christmas Gift Sparks Debate / Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by marvelous000: 1:59pm On Sep 08, 2019
Regiomontanus:
shocked shocked shocked grin Even if you don't like MariaLavina, why roast her to suya? E no good o. grin
you funny thogrin
Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by doitforyou(f): 2:18pm On Sep 08, 2019
So this post finally made front page.

The new replies since this post made front page are hilarious. Most guys that comment on the romance/family sections are very immature. They don't want or know how to handle opposing views, anybody with an "f" moniker with an opposing view is "dumb" "emotional" "thinking like a woman" an opposing "m" moniker is an "ass-licker" "weak man". These men shoot down alternative views/ideas in order to confirm and reinforce their existing myopic views. People that can't stick to topic because they don't have anything intelligent to add to the thread resort to sexist tropes to mask their deficiencies. An empty barrel makes the most noise.

Ironically, a moniker mentioned Quora, that's a very civilized forum where you seldom see people insult or attack a moniker simply because they disagree with their comment(s). I have also noticed people carry over beef they have with a moniker on previous threads to a new irrelevant thread. It seems to survive on NL you have to get in the gutter with these people, unfortunately I have been dragged down there sometimes. I have seen intelligent/insightful men and women leave these sections or don't post as often as they normally would.

I read this post almost immediately it went up and it was very one sided and it put ALL the blame on women, after he got 1 or 2 replies he went back and sanitized the post and then he added the little disclaimer on top. Anyone that isn't biased or misogynistic understood the post for what it was, even the sanitized version couldn't mask the sexist undertones. Why come to a public forum with diverse members if what you want is an echo chamber? If you think a woman's viewpoint is dumb and emotional, why not be confident enough to share your intelligent and rational viewpoint? Why hide behind offensive and derogatory words? Even if you want to use offensive words, why not use words that describe your OWN viewpoint. This section is now a joke, a cesspool of individuals that get their relevance on Nairaland.

6 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by DevilhimseIf: 2:21pm On Sep 08, 2019
[s]
KanuSE:


Lol cheesy
[/s]
Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by nams77: 2:25pm On Sep 08, 2019
CAPSLOCKED:


SADLY, THAT'S HOW MOST PEOPLE WERE RAISED TO SEE THEIR PARENTS.

THAT'S WHY YOU'LL FIND 50 MOTHER'S DAY CELEBRATIONS IN A YEAR, WHILE YOU HAVE JUST 1 CHILDREN'S DAY AND 1 DAD'S DAY.

THEY GUILT TRIP YOUNG ONES WHO THEN GROW INTO MATURED MEN WITH THE "I CARRIED YOU FOR A DIFFICULT 9 MONTHS", AS IF WE OWE THEM FOR WHAT NATURE BESTOWED UPON THEM.
AS IF THEY'RE THE ONLY SPECIES THAT BEAR KIDS. I DON'T THINK ELEPHANTS AND OTHER MAMMALS NAG ABOUT THAT SUBJECT LIKE HUMAN MOTHERS. IF MEN COULD GIVE BIRTH, WE WOULD DO IT EVERY TIME AND GET OVER IT WITH A BOTTLE OF BEER, WITHOUT SEEING ANY BIG DEAL IN THE SIMPLE THINGS OF LIFE.

A GIRL WHO DOESN'T RESPECT ANYBODY FEELS SHE HAS TO BE RESPECTED BECAUSE SHE'S A WOMAN, A POTENTIAL MOTHER OF MEN.

AND THEY ALWAYS HAVE CROCODILE TEARS TO ENFORCE THEIR WEAK IDEAS AND PRETEND THEY'RE BEING FRUSTRATED.
MEAN WHILE IT IS THEIR SYSTEM OF MANIPULATING EVERY LIVING THING ON EARTH.
Very apt. I have chatted several single moms and they all keep saying their Ex are oafs. The last one i was chatting with was also berating the Ex until i pressed harder and she opened up that the man is abroad and pays for the boy's tuition with out fail. He pays directly to the school.

My advice to men. Try and do financial transaction online. Pay school fees and other stuffs directly from your account. That way, there is evidence.

I remembered how a lady when online a while ago berating her Ex. She cried that the man doesn't even drop a dime or cater for the kids education. The man replied by posting carefully documented copies of school fees receipts

10 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by Regiomontanus(m): 2:28pm On Sep 08, 2019
doitforyou:
So this post finally made front page.

[s]The new replies since this post made front page are hilarious. Most guys that comment on the romance/family sections are very immature. They don't want or know how to handle opposing views, anybody with an "f" moniker with an opposing view is "dumb" "emotional" "thinking like a woman" an opposing "m" moniker is an "ass-licker" "weak man". These men shoot down alternative views/ideas in order to confirm and reinforce their existing myopic views. People that can't stick to topic because they don't have anything intelligent to add to the thread resort to sexist tropes to mask their deficiencies. An empty barrel makes the most noise.[/s]

[s]Ironically, a moniker mentioned Quora, that's a very civilized forum where you seldom see people insult or attack a moniker simply because they disagree with their comment(s). I have also noticed people carry over beef they have with a moniker on previous threads to a new irrelevant thread. It seems to survive on NL you have to get in the gutter with these people, unfortunately I have been dragged down there sometimes. I have seen intelligent/insightful men and women leave these sections or don't post as often as they normally would.[/s]

[s]I read this post almost immediately it went up and it was very one sided and it put ALL the blame on women, after he got 1 or 2 replies he went back and sanitized the post and then he added the little disclaimer on top. Anyone that isn't biased or misogynistic understood the post for what it was, even the sanitized version couldn't mask the sexist undertones. Why come to a public forum with diverse members if what you want is an echo chamber? If you think a woman's viewpoint is dumb and emotional, why not be confident enough to share your intelligent and rational viewpoint? Why hide behind offensive and derogatory words? Even if you want to use offensive words, why not use words that describe your OWN viewpoint. This section is now a joke, a cesspool of individuals that get their relevance on Nairaland.[/s]


Lol. The deception and emotional whining are ineffective. Say all you like, no one is falling for your trash. OYO. grin

5 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by doitforyou(f): 2:39pm On Sep 08, 2019
What have we here folks? A prime specimen. So what value do you want to add to this thread? You should be able to use your words to communicate your thoughts. You are really on a roll on this thread, I am sure this thread has been the best thing to happen to you in your life. You are not deceiving people though, we understand why you always have to be brash in all of your replies.

Regiomontanus:
Lol. The deception and emotional whining are ineffective. Say all you like, no one is falling for your trash. OYO. grin

9 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by Regiomontanus(m): 2:47pm On Sep 08, 2019
doitforyou:
What have we here folks? A prime specimen. So what value do you want to add to this thread? You should be able to use your words to communicate your thoughts. You are really on a roll on this thread, I am sure this thread has been the best thing to happen to you in your life. You are not deceiving people though, we understand why you always have to be brash in all of your replies.

Lol. Try harder. Men are beginning to see women for what they are and no one has time to address you guys' silly opinions. Real men don't make too much exchanges with women. There is a time to draw the line and leave you people with your deception. Martinez39 has done a great job that resonated with many. If you like, maintain your deception and manipulation but just know that they are ineffective. Good bye forever as far as this thread is concerned. grin

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by liberalchick(f): 3:07pm On Sep 08, 2019
I read the whole post and in MY opinion the OP generalized women, his add on clarifications didn’t change my opinion. No matter how many sexist, ageist or derogatory words you throw at me, I said what I said. You probably shouldn’t engage anybody until you know how to conduct yourself on a forum.

Regiomontanus:
I did not any part of his post instead I pointed you out for ignoring certain parts of his post. Keep playing dumb. If at this stage you don't know that read a write up completely before attacking the writer, you can't be helped. If you can't understand such a simple write up by Martinez39, you can't be helped. At your age, you call a clarification the addition of "some"? Do you know what it means to clarify?

When Martinez39 said he can't expect reasoning from the female gender on certain issues, he seemed like a misogynist but now I can see where the wise guy is coming from. Good day and from henceforth, I won't engage you. Rot in your foolishness.

7 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by CAPSLOCKED: 3:35pm On Sep 08, 2019
nams77:

Very apt. I have chatted several single moms and they all keep saying their Ex are oafs. The last one i was chatting with was also berating the Ex until i pressed harder and she opened up that the man is abroad and pays for the boy's tuition with out fail. He pays directly to the school.

My advice to men. Try and do financial transaction online. Pay school fees and other stuffs directly from your account. That way, there is evidence.

I remembered how a lady when online a while ago berating her Ex. She cried that the man doesn't even drop a dime or cater for the kids education.
The man replied by posting carefully documented copies of school fees receipts

THESE WOMEN ARE SOMETHING ELSE.

4 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by CAPSLOCKED: 3:42pm On Sep 08, 2019
doitforyou:
So this post finally made front page.

The new replies since this post made front page are hilarious. Most guys that comment on the romance/family sections are very immature. They don't want or know how to handle opposing views, anybody with an "f" moniker with an opposing view is "dumb" "emotional" "thinking like a woman" an opposing "m" moniker is an "ass-licker" "weak man". These men shoot down alternative views/ideas in order to confirm and reinforce their existing myopic views. People that can't stick to topic because they don't have anything intelligent to add to the thread resort to sexist tropes to mask their deficiencies. An empty barrel makes the most noise.

Ironically, a moniker mentioned Quora, that's a very civilized forum where you seldom see people insult or attack a moniker simply because they disagree with their comment(s). I have also noticed people carry over beef they have with a moniker on previous threads to a new irrelevant thread. It seems to survive on NL you have to get in the gutter with these people, unfortunately I have been dragged down there sometimes. I have seen intelligent/insightful men and women leave these sections or don't post as often as they normally would.

I read this post almost immediately it went up and it was very one sided and it put ALL the blame on women, after he got 1 or 2 replies he went back and sanitized the post and then he added the little disclaimer on top. Anyone that isn't biased or misogynistic understood the post for what it was, even the sanitized version couldn't mask the sexist undertones. Why come to a public forum with diverse members if what you want is an echo chamber? If you think a woman's viewpoint is dumb and emotional, why not be confident enough to share your intelligent and rational viewpoint? Why hide behind offensive and derogatory words? Even if you want to use offensive words, why not use words that describe your OWN viewpoint. This section is now a joke, a cesspool of individuals that get their relevance on Nairaland.




TEARS.
LOL.

5 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by doitforyou(f): 3:43pm On Sep 08, 2019
Predictable. You have over extended your shtick and you've nothing else to offer. Run along now... you won't be missed.

Regiomontanus:
Lol. Try harder. Men are beginning to see women for what they are and no one has time to address you guys' silly opinions. Real men don't make too much exchanges with women. There is a time to draw the line and leave you people with your deception. Martinez39 has done a great job that resonated with many. If you like, maintain your deception and manipulation but just know that they are ineffective. Good bye forever as far as this thread is concerned. grin

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by ImaIma1(f): 3:49pm On Sep 08, 2019
addictiv:
OP has raised valid points, a lot of children have been fed lies about their fathers by their mothers, who did so out for selfish gains. The ultimate looser is the child who is deprived of a father figure.


The fathers should get close to their children and stop using the excuse of "their mother is poisoning their minds" to cover their negligence.

3 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by ImaIma1(f): 4:00pm On Sep 08, 2019
The problem with this thread is that it takes another form of a female bashing thread which has become a norm on NL.

It's only a man that is not actively involved in his child's life that will be a victim of such a woman's influence on the child.

2 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by Regiomontanus(m): 4:04pm On Sep 08, 2019
ImaIma1:


The fathers should get close to their children and stop using the excuse of "their mother is poisoning their minds" to cover their negligence.
Are you trying to say that there are no mothers who poison their children's mind and alienate them from their fathers? Anyway, let me not waste my time arguing with a woman. Forget I asked. grin

4 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by ImaIma1(f): 4:14pm On Sep 08, 2019
Regiomontanus:
Are you trying to say that there are no mothers who poison their children's mind and alienate them from their fathers? Anyway, let me not waste my time arguing with a woman. Forget I asked. grin


Now this here is a major problem on Nairaland.

If you cannot be sensible and civil in your communication, please don't quote me.

4 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by Regiomontanus(m): 4:17pm On Sep 08, 2019
ImaIma1:
The problem with this thread is that it takes another form of a female bashing thread which has become a norm on NL.

It's only a man that is not actively involved in his child's life that will be a victim of such a woman's influence on the child.
1) Most fathers are away from home most of the time hustling to cater for their families.
2) Mothers therefore have all the time in the world with the children.
3) Never underestimate the power of brain washing. In addition, most mothers subtly make it known to kids that "it's either your father or me."
4) During marital dispute and in the case of separation in which the mother keeps the kids, the father is helpless against the brainwashing because the father will usually have to go through the mother to see the kids. The mother then has the privilege to regulate and manipulate the conversation between father and kids and the mindset of the children towards the father.
5) When the mother forbids the kids from giving the father their contacts and only permit calls through her phone, what can the father do? When a brainwashed child is blinded by hate and doesn't want to see the father, what can the father do?

More deception from ladies. Martinez39, the critical thinker and red piller, has exposed these wicked and petty mothers. Good day.

4 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by JONNYSPUTE(m): 4:18pm On Sep 08, 2019
ImaIma1:
The problem with this thread is that it takes another form of a female bashing thread which has become a norm on NL.

It's only a man that is not actively involved in his child's life that will be a victim of such a woman's influence on the child.
.. Lies.I disagree with you. For you to term or see the thread as a female bashing one speaks a lot. You are already biased.

5 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by Regiomontanus(m): 4:20pm On Sep 08, 2019
ImaIma1:


Now this here is a major problem on Nairaland.

If you cannot be sensible and civil in your communication, please don't quote me.
Lol. Face the truth. Martinez39 was right, having the expectation of females being reasonable on an issue like this is unrealistic. Like ubunja said, don't expect the sun to rise from the... grin

Good day.

2 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by Regiomontanus(m): 4:23pm On Sep 08, 2019
JONNYSPUTE:
.. Lies.I disagree with you. For you to term or see the thread as a female bashing one speaks a lot. You are already biased.
A woman is already biased and emotional once the cunning ways of the female nature has been exposed. Reasoning with them on issues like this is like expecting to see an alien spaceship in Nigeria. grin

7 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by ImaIma1(f): 4:24pm On Sep 08, 2019
Regiomontanus:

1) Most fathers are away from home most of the time hustling to cater for their families.
2) Mothers therefore have all the time in the world with the children.
3) Never underestimate the power of brain washing. In addition, most mothers subtly make it known to kids that "it's either your father or me."
4) During marital dispute and in the case of separation in which the mother keeps the kids, the father is helpless against the brainwashing because the father will usually have to go through the mother to see the kids. The mother then has the privilege to regulate and manipulate the conversation between father and kids and the mindset of the children towards the father.
5) When the mother forbids the kids from giving the father their contacts and only permit calls through her phone, what can the father do? When a brainwashed child blindly by hate doesn't want to see the father, what can the father do?

More deception from ladies. Martinez39, the critical thinker and red piller, has exposed these wicked and petty mothers. Good day.


I understand all this. My husband is away at work a lot and even travels. But the time he gets to spend with his daughter is very important to him. It's a joy to watch them. If I were to be the kind of wife that badmouths people, it will be hard to make her hate her dad. That's what I mean.

This kind of comment up here from you is why I say this thread is another female bashing thread.

3 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by CAPSLOCKED: 4:27pm On Sep 08, 2019
Starboytwo:
Ok, heres my story...

I was in 300 level, when my dad died in 2016, yeah i was there when he died, I mean literally, I was the last person he saw before he went beyond... I still remember how the nurses urshered me out, then I went by the window, I saw him took his last breath, I saw the nurse covering his face... I already knew before my brother's who were outside...

I didn't cry, when my eldest bro burst into tears, I just looked away, but I didn't cry... Why cry I didn't know the man... Apart from a few holidays, some visits, a long boring, very awkward (now most cherished) road trip, where we left Lagos in his car to our Homeland, azin our village "gan gan".... This old man took me home... Damn... I still didn't grab I needed my certificate of origin, cuz I just got admission...

You know the drill, polygamous family, 4 wives, 11 children... We the last, last wife, me and my little brother... Blah blah, she left, took us along, was five, bro was 3... Didn't see my old man again... Till he appeared when I was in pry 5... Coupla holidays, blah blah, my little bro decided to stay and live with him... So 50/50... All his children had some piece of him, except me... mummy's boy, all through... So I grew up on mummy stories, few times I spent with him were always awkward at best... Mummy's side was home, all the people I knew and loved ...

Looking back now, I think he tried to know me, he asked many questions, he bought me soccer boots, met my coach blah blah, drove me to my school, on my first day as a jss1 students( they still rep me till date, my old classmates)...

He was old, sick, yet still drove me home, I thought it'd be a day but we we're on day4 when I got real sick, I already told my mom and she made him bring me back....

all those quality times I could have spent with him, enjoy my father, his company, his last days Let's just say I was not a very good company.....


Something happened last week in my family and after 3 years since he gone, I cried uncontrollable in the bathroom, I cried so much my eyes were swollen,my girlfriend asked what's wrong with my eyes, they we're red with sorrow, I finally understood everything, it all came together, all the pieces,finally I know and understood the kind of man my father was, I finally understood the sacrifices he made, how hard his choices were... He was a good man, and for the first time in my life on Monday, I missed my dad...

For a minute I hated my mother for denying me the opportunity to know this man, my very own father... My beloved father... Damn...

I want to apologise dad, for being so stupid all this while, for not figuring things out soon enough, for frustrating you when you tried to connect, I'm sorry PAPA.... I will never Forget the look in your eye, the first day I came at the hospital, it's the most purest form of happiness I have ever seen, he held on to me and would not let go, he recognizes me after so many years and spoke so many things with his eyes, that now I fully understood....


Damn, i miss you Pop.... I miss you so much... I wish I could have that road trip again... Damn

Rest in piece sir....



YOU'RE A SEXIST AND MISOGYNIST. ALL NAIRALAND WOMEN ARE UNCOMFORTABLE AND UNHAPPY WITH THIS POST.

YOU SHOULD LEARN TO PLACE WOMEN'S HAPPINESS ABOVE ALL THINGS. NO MATTER HOW WRONG THEY ARE, NO MATTER HOW BADLY THEY DO THINGS, COMPLIMENT THEM POSITIVELY, RUB THEIR BACKS, AND CHEER THEM ON. ANYTHING YOU DO OR SAY THAT DOESN'T RHYME WITH THE AVERAGE WOMAN'S IDEAS IS HATE AGAINST WOMEN.

BE A "REAL MAN" HENCEFORTH.

10 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by ImaIma1(f): 4:29pm On Sep 08, 2019
Regiomontanus:
Lol. Face the truth. Martinez39 was right, having the expectation of females being reasonable on an issue like this is unrealistic. Like ubunja said, don't expect the sun to rise from the... grin

Good day.


As I said if you can't be sensible, please don't quote me.

You are already being emotional and unrealistic. You that don't have a mind of your own..you have to call Ubunja's name first. Please I am not ready for Ubunja's boys today.

3 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by Regiomontanus(m): 4:30pm On Sep 08, 2019
ImaIma1:


I understand all this. My husband is away at work a lot and even travels. But the time he gets to spend with his daughter is very important to him. It's a joy to watch them. If I were to be the kind of wife that badmouths people, it will be hard to make her hate her dad. That's what I mean.

This kind of comment up here from you is why I say this thread is another female bashing thread.
For showing small signs of calm at my truths, let me reply.

Never underestimate the power of brainwashing and female manipulation. As far as the mother has turned the heart of the child away from the husband, the little time the father spends with the child won't count because the child hates the father and won't open up to the father. You won't understand this because, by your own admission(that's if you telling the truth), you are not the kind of mother that brainwashes the child against the father.

2 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by CAPSLOCKED: 4:31pm On Sep 08, 2019
ImaIma1:


I understand all this. My husband is away at work a lot and even travels. But the time he gets to spend with his daughter is very important to him. It's a joy to watch them. If I were to be the kind of wife that badmouths people, it will be hard to make her hate her dad. That's what I mean.

This kind of comment up here from you is why I say this thread is another female bashing thread.


EVERY THREAD DISCUSSING THE EVILS OF MEN.. IS A GOOD MOVE TO SET THE SOCIETY RIGHT.
ANY THREAD ABOUT THE EVILS OF WOMEN SUDDENLY BECOME ABOUT WOMEN HATING, WOMEN BASHING, ALPHA MALES, STORIES UPON STORIES.

YOUR QUADRUPLE STANDARD IS ONE OF THE REASONS FOR THESE THREADS. MANY YOUNG BOYS HAVE TO WAKE UP AND GROW UP TO AVOID SUCH EVIL MANIPULATIONS.

11 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by Regiomontanus(m): 4:34pm On Sep 08, 2019
ImaIma1:


As I said if you can't be sensible, please don't quote me.

You are already being emotional and unrealistic. You that don't have a mind of your own..you have to call Ubunja's name first. Please I am not ready for Ubunja's boys today.
So if I write the following :
As Albert Einstein said "imagination is more important than knowledge", does it mean that I don't have a mind of my own and I am emotional and unrealistic? Does it mean that I am Einstein's boy?

Sorry to say, you are not bright and you are a bit daft. Maybe it's genetic or you are being emotional. Good bye and this time, I mean it.

3 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by Regiomontanus(m): 4:38pm On Sep 08, 2019
CAPSLOCKED:



EVERY THREAD DISCUSSING THE EVILS OF MEN.. IS A GOOD MOVE TO SET THE SOCIETY RIGHT.
ANY THREAD ABOUT THE EVILS OF WOMEN SUDDENLY BECOME ABOUT WOMEN HATING, WOMEN BASHING, ALPHA MALES, STORIES UPON STORIES.

YOUR QUADRUPLE STANDARD IS ONE OF THE REASONS FOR THESE THREADS. MANY YOUNG BOYS HAVE TO WAKE UP AND GROW UP TO AVOID SUCH EVIL MANIPULATIONS.
She is not bright. When Martinez39 said it's a waste of time to argue with women on certain issues, I thought he was a bit misogynistic. Beta me. Now I can see for myself given the bullcrap I have had to swallow from these females. They are full of deception, emotions and manipulation. grin

I promise myself as from henceforth to never argue with any female on issues like this. grin

4 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by ImaIma1(f): 4:39pm On Sep 08, 2019
Regiomontanus:
So if I write the following :
As Albert Einstein said "imagination is more important than knowledge", does it mean that I don't have a mind of my own and I am emotional and unrealistic? Does it mean that I am Einstein's boy?

Sorry to say, you are not bright and you are a bit daft. Maybe it's genetic or you are being emotional. Good bye and this time, I mean it.


See who is saying someone is not bright cheesy. You are so petty and touchy. And things trigger you easily. You are quick to throw jabs and insults. Is that your definition of being bright. Remove the plank in your eye.

It seems this is one of the teachings of Ubunja. His followers always call everyone daft and they see themselves as the brightest. Sorry to break it to you...you are blindly daft.

2 Likes

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by CAPSLOCKED: 4:41pm On Sep 08, 2019
addictiv:
OP has raised valid points, a lot of children have been fed lies about their fathers by their mothers, who did so out for selfish gains. The ultimate looser is the child who is deprived of a father figure.

THE CHILD, ESPECIALLY IF FEMALE GROWS UP WITH REASONINGS INHERITED FROM HER MOTHER. SHE PROCEEDS TO HATE ALL MEN THE WAY HER MOTHER TAUGHT HER TO HATE HER DAD.

THE OUTCOME IS WHAT WE HAVE IN THE GUISE OF "FEMINISTS" AND WOMEN LEADERS.

1 Like

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by Regiomontanus(m): 4:41pm On Sep 08, 2019
In our society, when someone is daft and you call them daft, they accuse you of bad manners. Oh, the irony. grin

1 Like

Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by Regiomontanus(m): 4:43pm On Sep 08, 2019
CAPSLOCKED:


THE CHILD, ESPECIALLY IF FEMALE GROWS UP WITH REASONINGS INHERITED FROM HER MOTHER. SHE PROCEEDS TO HATE ALL MEN THE WAY HER MOTHER TAUGHT HER TO HATE HER DAD.

THE OUTCOME IS WHAT WE HAVE IN THE GUISE OF "FEMINISTS" AND WOMEN LEADERS.
Funny enough, the stupid feminist will still make the same mistake her mother made.
Re: Children Of "Deadbeat" Fathers. Time To Think. by bukatyne(f): 4:45pm On Sep 08, 2019
Martinez39:


Due to the fact that fathers instill harsh discipline and are usually away working to feed the family, children are usually close to their mothers. Mothers usually spoil and pamper their children hence another reason children are close to their mothers. One advantage of this is that the mothers have a huge influence on the minds of the children. grin During parental dispute and irrespective of whether the wife is at fault or not, women are usually fond of brainwashing and poisoning the minds of their children against their fathers. Even if there is no dispute, some women still control the minds of their kids in order to get the upper hand in the childish game of power they started and are playing in the home.

Most men usually settle matters amicably and are willing to own their mistakes but women, whether or not they are wrong, will always want to "win" the dispute and would go any length to achieve such. Brainwashing and poisoning the minds of the kids against the father is one of the ways of achieving such. In such brainwashing, the children see the father as the bad person while the mum is the angel. Some children later grow up to see that it was the other way around while some never grow out of the brainwashing for many years. As the woman is brainwashing the kids, she keeps the kids distant from the father so that she can successfully fuel the narrative that father is a bad and was never there. She wouldn't even let the father visit instead she always give one excuse or the other or even avoid the father. The woman would even make sure that the contacts of the children are not available to the father. The woman might even put the children in a situation whereby either they are for her or for the father. You can't blame the children for falling for the lies because the mother has appeared so nice and caring to them. grin

Some mothers would be communicating to the fathers behind the children's back looking for up keeps yet they won't tell the children. They will exploit the kind hearted nature of the father to get money from him by making up stories that children are sick blah blah blah. They will then make it out to be that they are the ones making the money while the father doesn't care. Sometimes when the father wants to see his children, they will charge the fathers money in one form or the other. If they fulfill their promise of let the kids see the children, which many don't, the visit would be short. Afterall, she still let the father see his children, right? She might even post the visit with the pics on her social media so that everyone can see that "she let the kids visit and spend quality time with their papa". grin

If you are the child of a deadbeat dad who thinks father is evil and mom is good, you have to start asking questions. Here are some of the questions you should ask :
1) Do I believe my father is horrible because I really know him or it's what my mother told me? Have I heard both sides of the story?
2) Does my mother allow free and open access for me to communicate and build a relationship with my father? Is she always monitoring my conversations with my father and asking what we discussed?
3) Has my father been providing money but my mum doesn't tell me?
4) Does my father have my contact number or did my mum make it that my father can only communicate with me through her phone so that she can monitor and regulate the conversation? She could do so to fuel the narrative that mum is good and dad is bad.
5) Nairalanders can make their suggestions.

By asking these questions and making analysis, you would figure out if mum has skeletons in her cupboard or not. It's also possible that your dad could be the one at fault. Check things for yourself. There are good and bad fathers and there are good and bad mothers. Women who do these things are wicked and can't be said to really care about the children. Why are such women reducing their children to properties/pawn to help them get the upper hand in a parental dispute or childish game of power dynamics for their own selfish reasons? grin Why make their children live a lie that could stay with them forever for their own selfish reasons? This is immoral. Why deprive their children of fatherly love for their own selfish reasons? Why can't they leave their children out of their dispute with their father? Why can't these women have the maturity to admit to their wrongs? Some women even publicly smear the father's reputation with lies to fuel the narrative that mum is good, dad is bad. The worse is when some of the crazies among them murder or maltreat their children to get back at the father. grin



wink


No matter how you try to twist it, it is the responsibility of the father to ensure his children see him as he really is.

If all the children have to judge his persona is the feedback from their mother, he is still a failed father.

I know a father who visited his kids despite the fact that his wife left him when he lost his job.

He couldn't give the kids anything yet whenever he visited, he prayed for them, re-assured them of his love and dropped one or two nuggets.

Did I also mention that the wife was trying to poison the kids against their father so they had to meet outside?

If you a man enough to father kids, be man enough to nurture them and stop blaming your wife for their perception of you.

I know kids whose father disciplined them well yet they do not doubt his love. Some of these men were poor, others were not even good husbands so it was not like they were perfect.

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