gwama:


Why this question?? I'll return the question.

I have the impression that some people use the word job and career synonymously. For me a job is regular work for which you receive payment. Having a career is more than that, involves more responsibility and oftentimes people who have careers are more passionate about them than people who have "regular" jobs and they also need to invest more time in building and maintaining their careers. Hence, it is not such a big deal to have a (part-time) job and a family but it is a big challenge for women to have a career and a family. Few women can do it and not every woman should aspire to it. It is not easy and many women who try both struggle with feelings of guilt for leaving their kids in the care of others.

There are more women in leading positions without kids than with kids in some western countries. For obvious reasons.

fatymore:
There isn't a big deal if you can have it all.

Marriage for me first...

Career is not a must. The koko is to have Money and you can still have money when married.

How do you make money without career? Abi you don’t know what a career mean

Mindfulness:


It is not that easy to have it all unless we have a different idea of what having a career means.

I don’t think the fellow you quoted understand what career means

Plead:


I don’t think the fellow you quoted understand what career means

Well, many people use the two words, career and work/job, interchangeably but I have no problem seeking for clarification.

chronique:


Haaa! That won't be needed cos I wouldn't be caught eating akpu early in the morning and it's not even my favourite food. Besides, I wouldn't want you to look haggered and worn out by excessive pounding of akpu/yam. Forever is a long way to go.

Na so

pocohantas:
Na ladies them ask question, but na guys go answer pass. Make I observe...



That is probably the only man that would ever love you truly and not be in a competition with you. The only man you will chop his money and sleep well at night. Dad; a girl's first only love. If you find a man that loves you like him, you will know no limits.

The fellow you quoted (twoclans) is a male

This is a senseless/unintelligent question


Doesn't matter which you put first, one will always come to obstruct the other. You cannot build a career before marriage, and can't have a successful marriage before a career. Like Rome, both are not built in a day. You can't be 30 and say you have a successful career. Same applies to marriage. At 30 or 35, you should shut up and let women in their 40s and 50s speak.

If you must have something before marriage, use the word "employment", "job", or some savings in your bank account.

My kind of woman .

safarigirl:
Career

Once I have established myself, I can enter marriage knowing I have something to offer my partner. It is hard to find footing in your career after marriage.

I don't want to be anyone's liability, so, I would rather I have built myself to a reasonable extent, before joining forces with anyone

As a lady, I like to leave my options open as to the one that comes first, it will not be wise to lose both all in the name of waiting for marriage.... In many men's minds, women no marry because dem dey do shakara and want a rich man, NOT TRUE...how many men these days are as good, responsible, reliable as many of our fathers....FEW.....Also, I have seen ladies who chose marriage but still come back to beg for garri, money, clothes from her family or single ladies that they sometimes mock( like they achieved a trophy via hard work when they married)....marriage to a non- supportive, jealous man will SLOW down a woman if not make her a thing of the past for another woman to take over....If a woman embraces career and she sees a man later in life, if they can't easily have kids naturally, they can AFFORD to pay to having one or having to pay a surrogate mum or adopt a baby/child/teen( this, a lady can achieve whether married or not with her blossoming career). Pls, men should note that a woman must not propose to a man which is easier for the reverse and a woman must not die if she isn't married. Life is a gift from God and not just for marriage only....Personally, I can have kids/teens I train and call my own, no qualms.

Mindfulness:


Well, many people use the two words, career and work/job, interchangeably but I have no problem seeking for clarification.

I use them interchangeably too.

no, I am not. Do you prefer marriage to career?

Is that your son on your profile? you should be a proud mom,very handsome child

mysticgal:
Basically, life has a way of putting human beings in a frying pan so I’d say career.

This is because I have always wanted to be financially stable before risking a relationship aka marriage and also considering how much and bad the country is, career is very much needed.
However, if you choose career, there is a slim chance that Mediocre Nigerian men would come by. They hate overly independent women and have a love hate feelings for ‘gold diggers and slay queens’ I.e, they love subservient women....it boosts their ‘egos’. You may even meet some who think them marrying you is a supposed blessing or people who expect you to work and serve their needs and that of their families.
But then.:::..... you have to choose a succinct path in life.

Then if you choose marriage, forget, career or better still, prepare to work twice, thrice or quadruple as hard as your career mates. Once you give birth to one, two, three or how much you want, mahn, that’s how much hardwork you’d put in .
If you have a supportive spouse, the load becomes lighter, unsupportive spouse, 10times that freaking birth, career load and May God help you.


However, life is all about balance, you can have all. It depends on how you handle it, but then balance is key


Caveat: May The odds be in your favor

Mindfulness:


I have the impression that some people use the word job and career synonymously. For me a job is regular work for which you receive payment. Having a career is more than that, involves more responsibility and oftentimes people who have careers are more passionate about them than people who have "regular" jobs and they also need to invest more time in building and maintaining their careers. Hence, it is not such a big deal to have a (part-time) job and a family but it is a big challenge for women to have a career and a family. Few women can do it and not every woman should aspire to it. It is not easy and many women who try both struggle with feelings of guilt for leaving their kids in the care of others.

There are more women in leading positions without kids than with kids in some western countries. For obvious reasons.

Career does not prevent to make children, did not say to do a dozen like our moms, but one or two was enough.

gwama:


Career does not prevent to make children, did not say to do a dozen like our moms, but one or two was enough.

Making them is not the issue

joepepsy:
Is that your son on your profile? you should be a proud mom,very handsome child

Eeeeeewwwww

Please allow God to have full control of your decision. His ways are not our ways, His thoughts are not our thoughts.

We tend to make mistake when we did not allow God to lead and in turn brings tears and bitterness most cases.

Thanks

Talk true oo,no dey form feminist Oo

Twoclans:
Career

I love to foot my bills ,the only man I have ever been a liability to is my father .

chronique:


Haaa! That won't be needed cos I wouldn't be caught eating akpu early in the morning and it's not even my favourite food. Besides, I wouldn't want you to look haggered and worn out by excessive pounding of akpu/yam. Forever is a long way to go.

I don't mind. Sebi it is me that wants to pound. Okay, what is your favourite food?

Talk true oo,you guys look alike.

mysticgal:

Eeeeeewwwww

Career! So no man can bully me. I've seen the way men patronise their wives when they are entirely dependent on them.

Mindfulness:


Making them is not the issue

Oh good? You have to make them first, joys and problems are part of a person's life.

AwkaetitiBabe:
Anyone that comes first.

the same reply i gat from ma lady when i asked her between marriage nd career which is she considering

ichidodo:
Career should come first and foremost then she can take her chances with biological clock, going to Shiloh and fighting off infertility let's not even talk about giving birth to genetically defective offspring from very low quality eggs as a result of advanced age....(pls no mentions,I am not feeling fine)

Hahahahahahaha



Ppu of naira land

The two can't go together,you need concentration ,if you are not putting the concentration needed in marriage or career,you will not succeed.

GoldenEstacy:
In my own opinion, both are important. It's better that one finds a partner while pushing a career. Both can go together, especially if you meet a partner who wants you to also grow.
I personally, will try to manage both and settle with the person.

cipslim:
I understand that when it comes to sensitive topics like marriage and career especially for women, a lot of people have different opinions. Whatever your opinion is I do respect it; different things work for different people. Without much ado, let get into it.

Women who want to have kids should make it a high priority in their early twenties – late twenties to find a “partner”, (Note, I quote a partner, not a husband, as much as I am pro-marriage, it’s just not for everyone and not all women want a husband). According to statistics, it’s harder for women in their late thirties to get married.

Another big reason is because of the pressing issues facing Generation X: infertility. We are experiencing more women having issue with getting pregnant naturally and the cost of IUI or IVF is not getting any cheaper. Honestly, you have your whole life to get a career and you can even change career at any time in life. This is not true about having a baby.

If you are already in your 30s, single and want to have kids, you need to find a partner now. Take that career drive and direct it toward mating because your career skills will outlast your ovaries.

As much as I believe women should not be pressured into getting married as most African parents or families do, the reality is the woman’s biological clock is running. However, there is lots of evidence to show that a woman’s biological clock takes a nose-dive from age 35. A huge percentage of fertility statistics get bad at 35.

Mating ke? As animals that we are na. All you people think about is marriage. This is why Nigeria keeps getting worse. Leave people to live their life the way they choose. So if a woman is getting old like you said and she is single, her priority is to be sleeping around until she gets pregnant? Well done.

As baby mama?

gwama:
I prefer Baby and Career, this is two priority for woman.

AlphaStyles:
I want my wife to support me and the home so career first but make she no go over do career come forget about me

you mean make she no too get close to her boss abi dey travel with am for official assignment

We are your future husbands,we need to partake in the discussion.

ambivert27:
Why are some guys just dumb like this? I hardly see a "mens only" topic here where girls comment, but just mention "Ladies only" and see them running up and down the thread.

Very dumb fellas

pocohantas:


I don't mind. Sebi it is me that wants to pound. Okay, what is your favourite food?

Starch and banga soup and pounded yam with any bad ass soup. But guess what, they are not everyday meals. If taken 2 or 3 times in a week, that's fine by me cos they take a little bit of time to fix(especially the banga soup). I'd eat anything served so long as it tastes nice and is hygienically prepared and served. I'm not too picky about what should be served but how it is made and served.

MrsNwaAmaikpe:



Humans whether man or woman should have their career as priority.

A woman who cannot take care of her basic needs from the proceeds of her career before going into marriage is a potential punching bag and slave when things turn sour.

This is the 21st century, do not be pressured into marriage.

If you have unquenchable conji , get a intimacy gadget or cucumber. If you can't afford it, use candle.

So we have Mrs NwaAmaikpe also? Interesting!

chronique:



There are men like that but we're almost extinct.

I think almost every man is configured to be like that till heartbreaks and other influences.