I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd - Romance (2)

I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd - Romance (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum › Nairaland General › Romance › I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd (7261 Views)

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Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by healthserve(m): 2:48pm On Dec 31, 2019

TheGoodJoe:
You know, relationship issues is so confusing, especially when it comes to trust issues. Worst part is that individuals are mentally wired differently. The only true compass I believe that can direct you is how you feel.

Do not be pushy but try to take a stance when it concerns your heart. Find a tune button you can use to make him listen to you. Your friend is not the main challenge but you trying to make your man understand your happiness should be his priority.

Do not feel guilty for trying to stop it. At the end we are different and should work towards what makes us happy.

Put your happiness in front and hope he does the same for you.

I feel its best if she doesn't talk to me so it doesn't generate a spiral of bad energy but for her group friends to tell her friend to back down as it's becoming uncomfortable. She also needs to confront the friend again telling her that giving her his contact to speak with him was different from having the access to talk to him whenever that permission to speak with him once doesn't imply continous unchecked access

She also needs to act timely but maturely

1 Like

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by TheGoodJoe(m): 2:55pm On Dec 31, 2019*

healthserve:
I feel its best if she doesn't talk to me so it doesn't generate a spiral of bad energy but for her group friends to tell her friend to back down as it's becoming uncomfortable. She also needs to confront the friend again telling her that giving her his contact to speak with him was different from having the access to talk to him whenever that permission to speak with him once doesn't imply continous unchecked access

She also needs to act timely but maturely

It is a tough case and a lot of Relationships face this challenge. I am telling you, how to deal with it is dicey. A small mistake could break a lot of things. However, I feel getting a group of friends is making the circle in the know bigger, which is unhealthy.

I even feel talking to her friend was going to far. She is in a relationship and they should treat each other with respect. She was to take it up with her boyfriend and he finds a way to end it. Or just ends it by ignoring her messages. Anytime her friend asks him, he states he was too busy.

No need for him accepting she should tell her friend to stop. I see love as respect and sacrifice. Sacrificing for the happiness of the other. Now she has told her friend, I think the circle should stay small. Any other issue is with her boyfriend.

I hope the OP kills the guilt of asking for what she needs in a relationship.

A true and healthy relationship is one with a peace of mind.

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Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Nearbyproperty(m): 3:26pm On Dec 31, 2019

Happiness can never come from outside but radiates from inside,been jealous is a typical sign you love him more than he does. I will advice you to exercise some restraint because no pride price has been paid,the man is always the one holding the yam and also has the choice of who should have the biggest cut.those your warning is a typical sign of desperation and will make the guy feel over important.silent with intelligence gathering would have been a best option.my own reasoning thou.

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Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Puregold3(op): 3:35pm On Dec 31, 2019

TheGoodJoe:
You know, relationship issues is so confusing, especially when it comes to trust issues. Worst part is that individuals are mentally wired differently. The only true compass I believe that can direct you is how you feel.

Do not be pushy but try to take a stance when it concerns your heart. Find a tune button you can use to make him listen to you. Your friend is not the main challenge but you trying to make your man understand your happiness should be his priority.

Do not feel guilty for trying to stop it. At the end we are different and should work towards what makes us happy.

Put your happiness in front and hope he does the same for you.

I got.. thanks bro

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Puregold3(op): 3:39pm On Dec 31, 2019

Nearbyproperty:
Happiness can never come from outside but radiates from inside,been jealous is a typical sign you love him more than he does. I will advice you to exercise some restraint because no pride price has been paid,the man is always the one holding the yam and also has the choice of who should have the biggest cut.those your warning is a typical sign of desperation and will make the guy feel over important.silent with intelligence gathering would have been a best option.my own reasoning thou.

Thanks..

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Puregold3(op): 3:50pm On Dec 31, 2019

TheGoodJoe:
You know, relationship issues is so confusing, especially when it comes to trust issues. Worst part is that individuals are mentally wired differently. The only true compass I believe that can direct you is how you feel.

Do not be pushy but try to take a stance when it concerns your heart. Find a tune button you can use to make him listen to you. Your friend is not the main challenge but you trying to make your man understand your happiness should be his priority.

Do not feel guilty for trying to stop it. At the end we are different and should work towards what makes us happy.

Put your happiness in front and hope he does the same for you.

Should I let him know that I confronted her...
I hope he wouldn't get mad

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Goldenheart(m): 3:51pm On Dec 31, 2019

Its just a matter of time before they start Shanking each other....

You seem like a nice person...

2 Likes

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by TheGoodJoe(m): 4:08pm On Dec 31, 2019

Puregold3:
Should I let him know that I confronted her...
I hope he wouldn't get mad

I have a philosophy. A personal one. What you do in secret is open. You should not hide things from him. She will tell him and it will be better if you did instead of her.

If he is mad at you, no beef. He will get over it. Next time learn to talk to him when it concerns issues you are not comfortable with.

At the end, if the relationship works out, you guys have to learn to have a middle point with your characters and insecurities.

1 Like

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by TheGoodJoe(m): 4:12pm On Dec 31, 2019

Puregold3:
Should I let him know that I confronted her...
I hope he wouldn't get mad

He would be angry.

1. It shows you do not trust him when he said it was nothing.
2. It shows you can take action without confiding in him first.

You learn from it. At the end, he should know you are the type that likes emotional commitment. You can not feel sorry for who you are.

1 Like

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Nobody: 4:35pm On Dec 31, 2019

A good dick at hand is worth twelve in the streets....I under your pain my sister

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Liposure: 4:42pm On Dec 31, 2019

Talk 2 your boyfriend.tell him u are not comfortable with the affair. may be he might understand.

2 Likes

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by ITbomb(m): 4:45pm On Dec 31, 2019

Either the dick is good or he's a damn rich niggaa

Na dem dey confuse girls like this

2 Likes

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Nobody: 4:51pm On Dec 31, 2019

There's already a connection. Your guy wants to bleep her for the fun of it. He still likes you. Just increase your bed game and he will consider her less. I speak as a guy

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Puregold3(op): 4:55pm On Dec 31, 2019

TheGoodJoe:
He would be angry.

1. It shows you do not trust him when he said it was nothing.
2. It shows you can take action without confiding in him first.

You learn from it. At the end, he should know you are the type that likes emotional commitment. You can not feel sorry for who you are.

Of course, I do trust him even more than he has expected...He should believe I do
I was only feeling uncomfortable...

1 Like

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by isyourboy(m): 5:01pm On Dec 31, 2019

Ekemeze:
IS YOUR BOYFRIEND WORST FIGHTING FOR?

before a typical Naija girl would do what u just did, then the guy must be a rich nigga or pretty good in bedmatics

You just said what I'm about to type. Do I still need to comment?

1 Like

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Nobody: 6:07pm On Dec 31, 2019

Please let's discuss relationships topics once in a week..

The Knowledge i've acquired here is too much..

2 Likes

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by healthserve(m): 6:11pm On Dec 31, 2019

eni4real:
Please let's discuss relationships topics once in a week..

The Knowledge i've acquired here is too much..

Hahahaha my belle o

3 Likes

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Nobody: 6:14pm On Dec 31, 2019

healthserve:
Hahahaha my belle o

Overdose dey worry me cry

2 Likes

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by 400billionman: 7:54pm On Dec 31, 2019

Puregold3:
Hi nairalanders, I need your help...
I confronted my friend because I'm not comfortable with her chatting with my boyfriend all the time, cuz I cry most times I go through their chats, I feel insecure.. Although I trust my man, but I don't trust some ladies..
So I told her to back off, then she said she would stop, that she would even do beyond... have i done the right thing.. should I tell my boyfriend to stop the chat with her? Cuz this is the third time I'm going to tell him...
Your advice please...

He has ZERO respect for you.

Is that the kind of person you want to spend your life with ?

Ghost him. Make a fool of him. When he comes asking, tell him to chose between you and your friend and respect his choice.

1 Like

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Nobody: 8:35pm On Dec 31, 2019

Puregold3:
Thanks

You did good but also talk to your boyfriend before she does. So you don’t get painted as the bad person.

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Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Nobody: 8:59pm On Dec 31, 2019

If you talk to your boyfriend and friend and they lack so much respect for you and continue that disrespective attitude, kick "love" out of your head quit your relationship with both of them.

Puregold3:
Hi nairalanders, I need your help...
I confronted my friend because I'm not comfortable with her chatting with my boyfriend all the time, cuz I cry most times I go through their chats, I feel insecure.. Although I trust my man, but I don't trust some ladies..
So I told her to back off, then she said she would stop, that she would even do beyond... have i done the right thing.. should I tell my boyfriend to stop the chat with her? Cuz this is the third time I'm going to tell him...
Your advice please...

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Puregold3(op): 8:51am On Jan 01, 2020

Grayjoy:
If you talk to your boyfriend and friend and they lack so much respect for you and continue that disrespective attitude, kick "love" out of your head quit your relationship with both of them.

Thanks

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Puregold3(op): 8:53am On Jan 01, 2020

400billionman:
He has ZERO respect for you.

Is that the kind of person you want to spend your life with ?

Ghost him. Make a fool of him. When he comes asking, tell him to chose between you and your friend and respect his choice.

Thanks

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Puregold3(op): 3:25pm On Jan 05, 2020

TheGoodJoe:
He would be angry.

1. It shows you do not trust him when he said it was nothing.
2. It shows you can take action without confiding in him first.

You learn from it. At the end, he should know you are the type that likes emotional commitment. You can not feel sorry for who you are.

I guessed you skipped the part were i told him before confronting her and he asked me to go ahead. Just so as to satisfy my self.

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Puregold3(op): 3:28pm On Jan 05, 2020

I really appreciate all your advice.
I've actually learnt morr than i inquired.

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by healthserve(m): 3:31pm On Jan 05, 2020

Puregold3:
I really appreciate all your advice.
I've actually learnt morr than i inquired.

We hope the issue has been permanently resolved. Note boyfriend or girlfriend tag cheapen the value, to take the right actions depends on placing the right value on yourselves. Hence afesona or pitential/future husband/wife won't imply better treatment from friends

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by TheGoodJoe(m): 3:53pm On Jan 05, 2020

Puregold3:
I guessed you skipped the part were i told him before confronting her and he asked me to go ahead. Just so as to satisfy my self.

So how did he go? Did you tell him that you confronted your friend?

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by TheGoodJoe(m): 3:54pm On Jan 05, 2020

Puregold3:
I really appreciate all your advice.
I've actually learnt morr than i inquired.

Communicate your feelings more. Know what makes you happy and what doesn't. Communicate about it. This is most important.

Take care.

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Charleys: 4:06pm On Jan 05, 2020

Tell her you read her messages yesterday from your boyfriend's phone.

Keep reminding her.

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Puregold3(op): 9:16pm On Jan 05, 2020

healthserve:
We hope the issue has been permanently resolved. Note boyfriend or girlfriend tag cheapen the value, to take the right actions depends on placing the right value on yourselves. Hence afesona or pitential/future husband/wife won't imply better treatment from friends

It has been settled pal. We're good now..

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Puregold3(op): 9:20pm On Jan 05, 2020

TheGoodJoe:
So how did he go? Did you tell him that you confronted your friend?

Sure. He doesn't take it as anything. He's not even bothered.

1 Like

Re: I Confronted My Friend Because I'm Not Comfortable With Her Chatting My Boyfrnd by Puregold3(op): 9:22pm On Jan 05, 2020

Charleys:
Tell her you read her messages yesterday from your boyfriend's phone.

Keep reminding her.

I sure did that already. She's stopped .

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