₦airaland Forum

Sikay19:

This is too much for me to read this morning. I will comment when i get the summary of the whole story from the comments section. Btw, try to proofread your post next time, too many typo errors herein, good morning.

ultimate77:
Egbon, sebi I thought Overtaking is allowed. May be she sees better potentials in me.

oloriLFC:
na that type dey play along with you as a man until the abroad guy comes. Dem go done finalize their wedding plans sef, maybe na IV our bobo go see, he go come run to Nairaland again for advise. Shior!

CashDiMkpa:
Why did i even open this thread. You sound like someone with low self esteem.

uninspired07:
You can be sure that she didn’t complete it. Can’t you see how in love OP is?

Kirinwa:
You have 2 choices.

1. Reconcile her to her abroad boyfriend and get an iv hopefully and come here and post it so that we will wish you get get your own queen.

2. Go and see her parents and do official introduction if you are serious. At this stage, you need to come out open with her people.
I hope you don't open another thread in the future cos ...

noziz:
Op u nor well o! Na dis kind epistle u want make I read dis 2020? Ur head dey shake!

Aarenasbaba:
love in d air

Erediauwa:
"She had told me she has a guy outside the
country who she said want to marry her, she
loves him but then, she doesn't know what is
going on because she can't seem to get over
me and she said she knows it's not infatuation."
















[color=#ff9999]This is simply the "betrayal of trust" and a bitchy attitude from her.

Didn't she know that the dude hustling abroad was uneducated before saying "yes" to him?

And you Op, you're still putting your big head into another man's compound with the hope of chasing him out?

Damn dude, she sees you as the assistant technology boyfriend.

"Commot your hand for soldier man salary"[/color]

Erediauwa:
"She had told me she has a guy outside the
country who she said want to marry her, she
loves him but then, she doesn't know what is
going on because she can't seem to get over
me and she said she knows it's not infatuation."
















[color=#ff9999]This is simply the "betrayal of trust" and a bitchy attitude from her.

Didn't she know that the dude hustling abroad was uneducated before saying "yes" to him?

And you Op, you're still putting your big head into another man's compound with the hope of chasing him out?

Damn dude, she sees you as the assistant technology boyfriend.

"Commot your hand for soldier man salary"[/color]

ultimate77:
Hi guys... It's been a while. I hope y'all enjoying the new year and the winter. I practically sleep with my fan on and without cloth, I bath with cold water as well. Before you say I should go to jos and try it, I was born in Jos, plateau state and lived most of my life all in the north.

THIS WILL BE A LONG READ SO BUCKLE UP AND ENJOY THEN PUT MOUTH.

To my story. So I was able to do away with my ex as you guys advised me to, 2 years ago. After 3 months of the break-up, I got a good job and left the city. I wasn't posting any picture on my WhatsApp status neither do I post on Facebook. She was always viewing my status which are usually my poetry write ups. After a year, she called to apologise saying how I am the only best guy for her in the whole world, how I am the only guy who knows how to treat her well. Well, truth of the matter is I tolerated a her excesses and my guy just asked me to so I can learn how to handle any other woman.

I was celibate for the whole year before she came back begging and my guy asked me not to be rude, I should tell her it's ok, let's try again but I should just watch her for a month. Men and brethren, I was cautious enough not to allow us meet because she not someone you can easily come by and you will go without your JT responding to stimulus.... She had a way of getting my pants down. So I did everything so we don't meet.

So she told me how she had missed me, the love, the care, the outings, the foods I make for her and the sex most of all. She admitted she has within the year dated 2 other guys and still broke up with them.

Note: the longest relationship she has had was the one I and she had which lasted for 3 miserable years... But I learnt much lessons so I do not regret.

Refusing to meet her after we agreed, I was giving her excuses that I was busy with work this made her start showing that her attitude again.. I already had become immune to all those behaviours of her. I just ignored her and that was how it slid. I was happy we went silent on each other again.

So, mid last year, I was at work and one of my bosses brought this young beautiful lady to my office and requested that I help connect her to the company's wireless. I didn't even act as if he was talking to me neither did I respond to any of them, on that day, I was so furious about the job I gave my boys to do which they did not complete. So the man asked my colleague to help her do that. I was really not interested in connecting anyone to the network until I resolve the downtime. However, I really don't give face to female young chaps at the company because I know myself.. Someone might just fall in love with me and I can't even deal.

Fast-forward a month later, my colleague has started taking and chatting with the new lady, she actually Came for her industrial attachment. They were always chatting and she'll come visit him in my office during break hours. All the while, I only respond to her greetings but sometimes, I listened to their conversations while working on my system. She seemed to be a great personality as I noticed she barely get angry, each time she speaks, she made sense. She responds to any question you ask her. After 2 months, I asked my guy where the girl is from. He told me. I kept quiet. 2 days later, my colleague told me that the girl said she wanted to learn Java and he told her he doesn't know how to but that I can help her. He brought her to my table and I told her she was going to pay me 50k so I'll teach her all she needs to know. She bargained and we agreed on 40k. She came the first day during break period, I had to interview her and I was amazed at her responses.

Work wouldn't let her concentrate so we cancelled classes till when she's done. A day Came she just came to my office and that was a day for just chats. I led through the conversations and she clearly opened up to me to say.. In her words "you know what? The day that man asked you to connect me to the network, the moment I saw you, I had a very strong feelings for you and since that day I couldn't help it but I was scared you might bounce me. But I said to myself 2 things must happen. It's either I make this guy fall in love with me by my actions or I tell it to him... But you were not just interested." I was smiling. She told me everything she feels... I already had within two days thought of asking to date her and marry her because she possess 80% of all I want in a woman especially her common sense and love for technology.

She had told me she has a guy outside the country who she said want to marry her, she loves him but then, she doesn't know what is going on because she can't seem to get over me and she said she knows it's not infatuation. I knew it wasn't either. I loved the girl like mad within 3 days. I knew I would. After 2 weeks, I told her I want us to date and I want to marry her I know she will too. She couldn't say a word so I let her.. Fact is, she can't stay off my path. I developed strong feelings for her that I could just do anything for her. As the days go bye, it was becoming stronger and stronger.

She decided to start acting weird to see if she's really fooling herself at that point I realised and decided to take a chill pill and have a break.. But after 2 days, we hooked again. Things happened and we finally decided to stay with each other and marry when the time comes. I know I shouldn't beg a woman to marry me as a man but guys, marrying that girl is in my own interest because she will preserve my home and everything that has to do with me. She marrying me too is in her own best interest because she will have a man who is worthy to be called a husband.

Now the challenge is... This guy outside the country is younger than I am and just 2 years older than she is.. She is 23..and I am 7 years older than she is. The guy has built houses, has cars and has a business but not educated as I am, not sensitised as I am.. Just anything academics and social and otherwise.. Most especially I have a profession and yea, he has a business but has achieved more than me.. The lady Has weighed the both of us and is still very confused as she keeps saying both of us are just perfect for her. On her list of 8 guys, she had deleted 6 it's just left the two of us and that she really wish she can delete him but the guy is too good to be deleted like that. She hadn't had sex with him because she said "the guy said they should skip sex till marriage because of how much he loves her" and me in the other hand, I don't have a house built yet, my business is in it's pitching stage and I don't own a car or cars too but that isn't my biggest worries now.

I had told her, before the year ends before she wraps up her 500 level, my business should have been set up and running and since she loves my profession, that will be a plus for her and she will as well know and be proud that she was and is a part of my/our success story. She was sick about the whole thing and finally decided she'll settle for me and I advised she shouldn't tell the guy until he comes back to the country so you guys can talk and you can kindly tell him. Though I feel the pains this guy will go through receiving this news.. But it has to be done.

We now talk more often, as I am planning to marry her this year hopefully after her studies because I am certain the money will be available even to buy her all she needs. She had read my vision and seen a headway and how I strive to make them come alive. She has been quiet supportive with her advice and love. However, at some point, I fear she might just change her mind and return to the guy. You know how inconsistent some ladies can be na. She told me the guy had visited her mum and her elder sister who is married and they all liked him but her father hasn't seen him yet.

My aunt rarely accepts girls I show her but then moment all my family members saw her picture, they all accepted her and asked that I bring her. Me on the other hand, I had only spoken to her mum just ones and that was because I needed to help them do a payment and we've not met. Most of the men at the company are asking the girl to marry them as she shows me the whole conversation.

Guys, at some point I feel she won't leave me at a point I feel threatened by the communications between her and the guy though it doesn't last longer than 5 minutes but we speak like 40minuites over the phone. On free days 2 hours sometimes. And I am not scared that she might leave or maybe that I can't get another. Nada! There are many options but she's number one and I know I love her more than any one else. She has other options too but I can't speak for her.

Guys, anything I can do to secure this girl? Even though I know I got her at angle 90° for now not even 45° because @45° there won't be much distractions. I hope no body comes to tell me to go acquire what the other guy has acquired because I'm in the process.

I just need a few words guys.

Please help

victorian:
Overtaking is allowed if she loves you and if she can stay faithful to you.

The other guy abroad may just be stringing her along. He may not even have serious plans in marrying her. His having houses and cars does not mean, immediately he comes back to Nigeria, he will marry her. He may not marry her.

So don't be fooled by it.

Most abroad guys are really not ready to settle down, but they know how to waste their gfs time in Nigeria.
. If she was so sure the abroad guy will marry her, she wouldn't even allow romantic feelings to get to this extent. But she wants backup just incase and her backup plan is you.

I see her as an Oliver Twist, her eyes her on the first guy cars and houses, which she's not sure may marry her.

And I bet you even after marrying her and if the guy comes back to Nigeria, she will visit him, he will fucvk her several times before delivering her back to you then travel back abroad. Or he May pressured her for marriage and that's when she will definitely leave you, if uv not gotten your own car and house by then.

So my friend, she is not the ideal woman for u.

Her eyes is still roving back and forth . May God help u sha. You are dating the wrong girl.

MartinsD12:
The way guys dey Mumu eeh is so foolish, you Wan live your life on competition with the other bigger guy, you on a gamble thing, girls will always go for the highest bidder

Auladimeji:
All of you advising these man are just wasting your time.

Those that are in love are hard to give advice because they won't listening, it's only heartbreak that can reset their brain

MrHighSea:
Guy wan marry.
Girl get 8 men on list.
Guy kw se im na no. 7 and e no too gada money.
Guy dy compete with abroad based young money bag.
Girl is 23 n undergraduate.

Is guy mad or not?

ehmmy11:
Mr Op when you marry this girl along the line when you guys have an argument she will always compare you to the opportunity she missed it will drive you crazy... Like someone said marriage don't last if the girl is stolen

She will always compare you to him and wish/think what would have been.. This opens the door for her to cheat with him...

NB: when you meet a new girl pls and pls find out if she is dating someone .. Serious or not factor it in your decision making