I’m a 26 years old woman married to a 37 years old man. We have been married for almost 3 years.

We don’t have kids yet and 6 months ago I ended up in hospital with sepsis. The doctors originally thought it was caused by a kidney infection but later found that it was caused by Pelvic Inflammatory disease.

They repeatedly asked about my sexual history but I have only slept with one person in the past 3 years - my husband. I ended up having to have emergency surgery as the infection would not respond to the IV antibiotics they were giving me. I was in hospital for 10 days and have potential long- term damage which will affect my ability to have children.

I recently found out that my husband has cheated on me a number of times throughout our marriage and that the Pelvic inflammation was caused by untreated Gonorrhoea.

When I was discharged from hospital, he admitted that he has been cheating on me with a single mother of 4 (unprotected sex ) And he got the gonorrhea! How irresponsible! I am completely devastated and don't want to believe that the love of my life could be so callous. I very nearly died and if it were not for the brilliant doctors who quickly recognised my symptoms.

Of course the woman my husband got the gonorrhea from denied everything and I bet she won’t go get treated and will continue to spread this nasty and dangerous disease! She is done with having kids so why would she care, right?

Well, I do want to have kids and I won’t let my fertility and health taken away! the emotional damage caused by the infidelity itself is horrible. I feel angry, dirty, and ugly. All I want to do is cry all day. I can’t talk to anyone about it because I feel so ashamed. The person I trust the most is my mother but i don't want to break her heart. I know that to her my happiness matters the most and I think she would be angry at me the rest of her life if I told her that I still love my husband.

My husband feels remorseful and said he would never cheat on me again. He said he would choose me over any lifestyle and that he would give up everything for me. I have a very hard time trusting him again and I still don't know what I want from this whole thing. I just can't understand why my husband would have sex with a disgusting, nasty woman and betray me on so many levels. My pride got hurt so badly. I feel so ugly and worthless. My libido is absolutely gone. I feel empty inside. Then all the sudden I feel horrible, horrible anger and I want to break everything in sight. On some nights I can't sleep and sometimes I want to sleep all day. Most days I'm not even hungry and I have to force myself to eat something.

I feel like I will never be happy again. I used to be a happy, confident, bubbly person, now my zest for life is gone. Is this normal? Will these feelings ever go away?

I really want to give you a hug.

Time heals everything .

I'm very very sorry, they say time is the best healer.......do try to get your joy back.
Sorrow and heartache is too much for a young, confident woman like you.
Be strong, be brave!

Sry .. I know it ain't easy but with time you would heal..

Okay nah

Its the nature of men to cheat and sleep around. The only thing a man sees in every woman is sex. The man loves with is peniss and the woman with her heart. God created us this way.
It takes a lot of maturity and self control not to cheat as a man

MANGAM:
Its the nature of men to cheat and sleep around. The only thing a man sees in every woman is sex. The man loves with is peniss and the woman with her heart. God created us this way.
It takes a lot of maturity and self control not to cheat as a man

God "created you" that way and still commands you not to commit fornication nor adultery? He created you in His own image, to be the physical and spiritual head of your home and not to sleep around like a dog.

Sorry for your experience this is not your fault in any way. Please take solace in prayer and the word. Also agree calmly with your husband.to have periodic medical checks and that if he wants to f outside he should wear a rubber.

Please dont dwell on the past.Continue to strive to improve yourself and overcome this to become a stronger person.

We are with you in thought and prayers. God doesnt just heal physical he heals emotionally too and he HAS healed you in Jesus name i pray

An individual who cheats is a liar, your husband might have multiple illicit sex partners, and might not have contacted the disease from the said woman.

Hope you plan to run more extensive tests to confirm you can still give birth. Just be strong the Lord is your strength and like someone said with time it will get better. As for your husband, I'm guessing he should be contrite enough at this point and on his toes to make things right so no need hammering on his Bleep up here but husbands if you can't zip up at least play safe, you owe your partner safe sex if not faithfulness.

Madam once more it is well with your soul

MANGAM:
Its the nature of men to cheat and sleep around. The only thing a man sees in every woman is sex. The man loves with is peniss and the woman with her heart. God created us this way.
It takes a lot of maturity and self control not to cheat as a man

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

Deal with your sins than 'normalizing' them.

This is truly sad

I feel your pain and hope you heal sooner than later. Marriage is becoming an extreme sport this days.
I won't say much about your husband. I care more about your well-being at this Time and you should too. Focus on yourself and work at healing. The truth is you can find the happiness you seem to have lost. Find activities, hobbies to keep you busy and your mind occupied.

Good luck

Please tell me you're seriously considering divorce. If not, why not?
I believe forgiving an affair is possible, but giving a spouse an STD or a mistress that ends up pregnant is a deal breaker. He willingly put your health at risk by having unprotected sex with this woman and then with you. There is no forgiving this in my opinion.

I'm sorry this is happening to you.
Maybe you need a little space, to clear your head...
Being in that house will continually infuriate you and I can see all the bitterness this is giving you especially that you have been TTC and it looks like your husband couldn't care less.
.
Take some time away to clear your head.
A little change of environment might do you some good.
.
This is also not a reflection on you. Your husband cheating on you is not your fault. He should be accountable to you for his actions. He should be accountable to your marriage. You are not to blame here. Be very clear about this.

Embrace yourself with happiness, life is too short to develop hypertension. I pray to answer all prayers in amazing way.





some men are scumbags! God will heal you

Thank you so much for your advices, I really appreciate all the positive feedback. This means so much to me to know I have this kind of support.

Two options

Get a boyfriend that looks similar to your husband and have a baby for him. Make your husband pay for the kid until the kid is grown and then tell him the truth.

Or.....you’re only 26, you have the world ahead of you. You can dump him and find someone else.

That’s on the off chance that you’re not another troll account created for sensational stories.

No hypocrite should quote me to talk nonsense please. Thanks.

She should consider divorce? Doctor says she will not be able to have kids anymore, divorce doesn't seem like the right option, except she would divorce and also sue him in court for causing her such medical harm. OP, it is no use waiting, just adopt a baby asap, forget the lies of that man, if you do not pressure him to adopt now that he is still very guilty of his actions, he will abandon you in future. If he can cheat in just 3yrs of marriage with a healthy wife at home, what makes you think he will now be faithful with a wife with a medical condition. Be wise, pray as well, a miracle may happen.

Sexyliciousbri:
Please tell me you're seriously considering divorce. If not, why not?
I believe forgiving an affair is possible, but giving a spouse an STD or a mistress that ends up pregnant is a deal breaker. He willingly put your health at risk by having unprotected sex with this woman and then with you. There is no forgiving this in my opinion.

If this is a true story, I will advise you seek professional help in terms of therapy to help you process what you are going through and give you a clearer perspective about your marriage. Repression is deadly as it pose danger to emotional and cognitive health as one may end up injuring herself or the husband. The thought and the eventual stabbing/killing of spouses in marriages do not just come up from nowhere.

God give you the strength in these trying times

Nope, I think the infertility affects only the woman, the cheating husband is free from it.

cococandy:
Two options

Get a boyfriend that looks similar to your husband and have a baby for him. Make your husband pay for the kid until the kid is grown and then tell him the truth.

Or.....you’re only 26, you have the world ahead of you. You can dump him and find someone else.

That’s on the off chance that you’re not another troll account created for sensational stories.

No hypocrite should quote me to talk nonsense please. Thanks.

Since you've decide to forgive your husband, time will heal you and make everything beautiful again.

Go on a vacation alone to anywhere of your choice, cry if you must but don't do anything nasty to yourself.

PM NEWS people them.

The only thing am particularly about is how the mod will rephrase the text when moving it to FP.
Just so you know, this is her original text.....
(Re: My Husband Gave Me An STD That Nearly Killed Me)

Dominiondominio:
Thank you so much for your advices, I really appreciate all the positive feedback. This means so much to me to know I have this kind of support.

Please don't kill yourself ...don't blame yourself . With time, you ll come out of it

Foodqueen:
The only thing am particularly about is how the mod will rephrase the text when moving it to FP.
Just so you know, this is her original test.....
(Re: My Husband Gave Me An STD That Nearly Killed Me)

She shares her pains and all that's important to you is the feminist gain in it...smh

Winneygirl:
I'm sorry this is happening to you.
Maybe you need a little space, to clear your head...
Being in that house will continually infuriate you and I can see all the bitterness this is giving you especially that you have been TTC and it looks like your husband couldn't care less.
.
Take some time away to clear your head.
A little change of environment might do you some good.
.
This is also not a reflection on you. Your husband cheating on you is not your fault. He should be accountable to you for his actions. He should be accountable to your marriage. You are not to blame here. Be very clear about this.

OP you need to read this advice all over and think about accepting it. You need to take time away from the marriage and your husband do u can heal. The more you see him you remember all that happened the more difficult.
He messed up big time and put your life at risk If you had died will you know what killed you no ? He may have even continued his escapade.

Pls if u can, take a trip to somewhere beautiful to do something you enjoy doing alone. If he wants to go round the world looking for u that's his problem. If he doesn't fine n good. U really need time to heal for the sake of your health and wellbeing as a woman.

May God be with you and save more women from irresponsible pigs that feed on public dungeons

femi4:
She shares are pains and all that's important to you is the feminist gain in it...smh

Sleeping with a narcissist.thats the result

Solution- close your legs finally and take care of the children you have

Promiscuity is not like buisciut you snatch from the hands of children and you think that settles it .its a dirty and unhealthy habit that has entered the bones of a lot of men and women


The habit wasn't formed one day so apology won't take it away

Wait till when he/ she has a conducive environment for turning his private part into a public part then you will know whether he's lying or saying the truth about his repentance

cococandy:
Two options

Get a boyfriend that looks similar to your husband and have a baby for him. Make your husband pay for the kid until the kid is grown and then tell him the truth.

Or.....you’re only 26, you have the world ahead of you. You can dump him and find someone else.

That’s on the off chance that you’re not another troll account created for sensational stories.

No hypocrite should quote me to talk nonsense please. Thanks.

You are really funny ma'am ...laughing...

Why will a married man have an affair without condom, sometimes I wonder the kind of mind some people get

That's what you get when you marry your ancestor. A friend (mostly a partner in your age group) wouldn't cheat on you with a married woman of 4 kids.