No two people are the same, I would marry someone that has some of my father's character traits, maybe 60% of it.

In retrospect, a nagging troublesome woman could be what drives a man to drink.

This could be because he is scared of coming home to face another world war.
As much as I can, I always say that it is important to look critically at both sides and pick the truths.


I know where you are coming from. I have been there and I can feel your plight.

Learn all you need to learn so you don't fall into the same trap

mikeybrainy:
For me I wouldn't try it, I can never marry someone like my mom. If I try that I would end up in an asylum.

She is a good mother, though not perfect (nobody is).

Some of my reasons are:

Nagging (like the neigbours can narrate everything happening in our house if asked to)
Involving strangers in family issues (like she says everything)

She can't ever take the blame for anything (blames everyone for her woes, and she is never wrong)

She wants to collect back every single penny she spends in the house (which is impossible)
Incites the children against their father (never realized this until I grew up and started thinking like a man, and honestly I'm sorry for all the ways I have acted to my dad, though my own is still fair, my siblings have complete disregard for their father)

Other things too that I can't mention here (makes me feel ashamed.

I realized all these when I started looking at everything from the lens of a struggling husband and father, and I'm still contemplating if marriage is worth it after all, I might as well stay single.... (I only date and break up with girls in my mind, Lol) cos I don't think its worth all the stress. Growing up in a broken, dysfunctional home is hard (sighs).

I wouldn't put all the blame on my Mom but I have resolved not to imbibe my dad's bad habits too (I can't even drink 1% alcohol not because I can't or it's bad, but I run away from it when I think of the things dad would have achieved, if he were not addicted to it)

Sorry for the long post.

Can you marry someone like your mom/dad?

Opinions

AdaoraJoy:
I can't marry someone like my Dad

Why....?
Thought I asked you to change this profile pic?
Sha good afternoon

Bola146:
Good forbid I marry a man like my father, I pray that I marry a man so good, caring and generous like my mom

You want to marry a woman??

The only problem is that o can’t find someone like me mom. I might die single search for her doppelgänger

Ladycewhy:
I always pray for God never to give me a man like my dad ,I would rather remain unmarried than marry a man like my dad!.


A wicked philanderer,a toxic misogynist,a typical traditional man still stuck in the 1800s

a lady like my mother?? .yes, i would love to

All I know is my mum was and is still a lucky woman. It's because of her I believe it's only God that can give you a man not all these she-males around.

Amanee:
If na play, abeg stop am


A man like my dad? NEVER

But why though, if you don't mind me asking?

Iamikeokwu:
Yes i will marry some one like my mother even though she is late


My mother suffer for my dad come rain come shine she even cover my dad disgrace outside my dad don’t hv tooo much but my mom struggle a lot to provide she was the one dat is bringing money in the family and still yet she still respect my dad she can’t carry out any decision like with out my dad even though she is providing

Yes i would 1000000% marry a lady who act like mom

Of course na, a woman that will suffer and struggle to provide for the family, and put food on the table, while you sit down and not do anything, but still deserve respect abi? Nonsense

Having someone as a mother and having someone as a wife are two different experience.

Being a wife and being a mother are two different functions from two different perspective.

If you want to marry someone like your mother, you have to be like your father so that your wife will be like your mother, and your son will feel like you.

It's funny but having your mother as your wife doesn't mean you'll have the same feelings as you do being a son. Don't forget, you'll not be a son anymore but a husband. The same applies to females.

I agree, one can be tempted to make such choice if possible but that doesn't mean it's the best.

The same thing can be good for the eye and be bad for the mouth.

DukeNija:


What does this have to do with the topic? Or am I missing something?

Lol, most people on this thread are just being too sentimental and carried away because oh, it's their mom, love of their life, she gave birth to them. Fact is 90 of mother's hardly support their husbands. They put all the financial burden on him without wanting to spend their own money. Growing up, mine had a very terrible attitude I thought was normal but as I became a man and started thinking well I realised it didn't just make sense. Ordinary for we the children to eat bread, she'll never buy with her money, she'll rather be expecting our dad to come back home first so he can buy bread. She had a shop then, she ruthlessly packed all the food stuff in our home store to go and sell at her shop, there was usually nothing to eat at home because she had gone to sell them off and it's not as if she'll spend the profit on her kids, she'll rather spend it on her self. She was a salary earner too but the way she does and stingy with money, you'll begin to think she wasn't even earning anything.

Then there's another bad attitude of not being able to keep secret, she basically didn't know how to shut her mouth and hold tight to a secret. She was a kind of person that if she won $1M dollars, she'll make sure the whole world knows she just won a million dollars. When my sister traveled to Yankee back then, the person wey dey go Yankee self no tell many people . Just a few family members and about one or two friends. Na this my mum begun spread the news on her behalf even go church give testimony. When I gained admission to thw university, she made sure the whole world knew, I started getting unnecessary calls from strangers whose kids were also looking for admission. When I graduated same thing, I started getting calls from strangers congratulating me simply because she must have told the whole world as usual. I got my first job, same thing, na she go give testimony in church without my permission lol. I started getting unnecessary calls from people saying they needed financial assistance. And she would also never contribute anything but always want to enjoy the profit. We had a poultry then we run yearly, she will never use her own money to buy ordinary feed but when it's time to sell the birds , na there you go see am.

Also, she usually put herself first over her kids. She was never always ashamed to chop better food while her kids ate jargons. Those years, she did something which I can never forget. Her uncle came back from Canada and sent her some money to give to me. This woman never delivered the message, she squandered the money on God knows what. I only got to know few months later but kept quiet , I didn't say anything.

Fact is, you can't get any answers here because most people are just too sentimental. The love for their mom won't allow them the terrible side of her.

mikeybrainy fuckingmallam45 mobileboy Abbeylanre15 maximusprime2000

[quote author=Ladycewhy post=90047323]I always pray for God never to give me a man like my dad ,I would rather remain unmarried than marry a man like my dad!.


A wicked philanderer,a toxic misogynist,a typical traditional man still stuck in the 1800s

Ladycewhy:
I always pray for God never to give me a man like my dad ,I would rather remain unmarried than marry a man like my dad!.


A wicked philanderer,a toxic misogynist,a typical traditional man still stuck in the 1800s

Na Wa oh

And if she change in marriage to be someone like your mother?

adadike:
My dad, a strict disciplinarian , provides for most of our needs. A strong prayer warrior, physically strong , very hard-working . Can stand by you even when the world is against you. Love you Daddy but I honestly would love to marry someone like my mom. Gently, tall, great physique, very sweet, light skin and beautiful woman. Kind to a fault. See everyone as a member of her family. Eat in the same plate with her maids and helpers. Takes good care of them as well. No difference between outsider, maid or children. Everyone is the same to her irrespective of religion and tribe, loves and caters for all . Strong and hard-working, supports her husband, keeps my extended family together. Loved and took good care of my paternal grand mother when she was alive. My Super Woman, I don't know if I can ever be like you coz you are extraordinary but I want to marry a man that near these qualities. God bless you mom

hmm...

richeeyo:
Bastard pikin every where this days

Remember the kind of upbringing you had isn't the same with another person. Keep your mouth shut and stop insulting them or you have your silly self to blame.

My mum is a super woman, i would anytime, anyday. My mum made my dad's struggle lighter and still accord him maximum respect as the head, in turn my dad loves and respects her.

I'd say they are a tag team and a match made in heaven, little wonder why i adore marriage.

phr0nesis:
Appearance: No
Character: Absolute YES

Note: Mum is good looking and looks a lot younger than her age but mehn she is shooooort

Must you put several O's in the short

Bola146:
Good forbid I marry a man like my father, I pray that I marry a man so good, caring and generous like my mom

u must be really angry wit ur dad

softplace:
Even in my sleep i cant marry any of them

oga wetin happen now?

eni4real:

wetin happen?are you shocked that dead beat fathers is a norm among Nigerian men?nor let your eye balls fall out o

These tells you the evil women / mothers do at home, telling their children bad things about their father in-order to win them over.

I still have to blame the men for believing that things will get better or change and allowing this happen by getting married to
1. a broke girl who finds it very difficult to have a days meal.
2. a prostitute (red light, causal or corporate) and fighting to make her stop.
3. an irresponsible brat and trying to make her responsible.
4. a LovePeddler that sleeps and satisfies 15 guys a day to quench her sexual orgy and claiming she is doing that because of the money.
5. a stingy and lazy scum believing the husband is to take care of the family then die off fast so she can regularize her cheating partner.

Men, if you really want to change things to benefit you.
1. Never marry a jobless girl
2. Once she’s working, assign / divide the house responsibilities and give her 35% or 40% even more so she won’t have extra cash to cheat on you.
3. Talk less at home.
4. Never in your life trust any woman but never let her know, so your eyes will be on her illicit act anytime any day.
5. Never you eat alone, call her to eat with you. Greater percentage of woman poison their husbands food to destroy the mans body system gradually till you die and nobody will suspect her at all.
6. Never you payback or give back any money your wife spents at home, it’s part of building the family unless she will give you back all you have spent on her.

Thanks me later

Ladycewhy:
I always pray for God never to give me a man like my dad ,I would rather remain unmarried than marry a man like my dad!.


A wicked philanderer,a toxic misogynist,a typical traditional man still stuck in the 1800s

wetin happen

Partially,I'll want a woman like my mom but let her be smarter!
But I wont advice my sisters to even date a man like my father,talkless of marry sef.

i will not try it

Yes... Would want to marry a man like my father... Strict, super hardworking, loves his children and wife so much, never ever compares his children with other people's children, understanding too... He can go to any length for his family. God bless you daddy

I kon be im replica

SavageBoy:


Na Wa oh

nothing wah for here, it is common knowledge that many Nigerian men are wicked and toxic ,na our mothers dey cover their nasty attitudes because of tradition and religion.

softplace:
Even in my sleep i cant marry any of them

take ahm jeje

Most of the comments above shows the current state of many homes in Nigeria. Dysfunctional, acrimonious, hatred, pride and vices.

A lot of marriages are going through trying times. May God have mercy and mend all broken homes, strengthen couples who are facing challenges and brings peace to families. Amen

Nooil:
All I know is my mum was a lucky woman. It's because of her I believe it's only God that can give you a man not all these she-males around.

Mad oh

No he will use anger to disfigure me one day