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My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. - Romance (6) - Nairaland

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Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by AuwalYusuf812(m): 10:42pm On Jun 10, 2020
We are still looking forward on how we can settle the matter here before we get to you.

The fear of marriage this days has increase much
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by kenfarm(m): 10:42pm On Jun 10, 2020
Boredasf:
So you want him to sacrifice his freedom by marrying you abi
Abeg shift!!!

That young man is wise for not wifeing you up.
Marriage benefits Women not men.

I sincerely hope more men adopt this philosophy.
You women don't deserve marriage.
Any man that decides to marry any woman in this 21st century should know that he is doing her a HUGE favor!

U made a point

5 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Confusedgirl869: 10:42pm On Jun 10, 2020
victorian:








My dear, use your brains


Don't end like other baby mama's with different kids from different dads.

With all the true life stories u hear around u. Increasing number of ladies in their 20s with kids Upandan without father or husband figure in their lives and kids lifes, do u still want to open. Your eyes wide and fall into that category?

Sho fe gbo!


Any child born without the parents married is labelled as ILLEGITIMATE CHILD!


is that what u want for. Your kids?

Your parents didn't get married, you remember what u faced growing up. So
Why do this sacrilege to your unborn kids.

Jeez!

Thanks Vic, our Nigerian chinese. I don receive sense this night.
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by loswhite(m): 10:44pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.
please be a baby mama for your boyfriend....lol.
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Dewisedick: 10:45pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.


Girls this days don't want to settle down. They want to flesh till they get old maybe 30 before the man they gave birth to will come and Mary them. I wondered why you want another marriage when he is already married to you - do he not do u like he is doing to his wife. That is what fit girls now a days so give it to him because soon, that is going to be the general trend and is already everywhere. 9 out of 10 girls I have gotten that close to have baby(ies) for men who dump them after the pregnancy.

Don't say I am wicked. Na wetting girls don turn to dry make me the talk the truth so ooo

4 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Nobody: 10:46pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.
Aunty, walk.

I repeat. Walk.

It is not by force. He will never marry you, cos he doesn't love you.he just wants to see how much BS you can tolerate from him.


He is afraid of marriage, yet he's sleeping with you, what type of fuckery is that. Hope he is using condoms, and you are on contraception.

He doesn't see you as his dream girl. He has fuckboy written all over him. So if dangote's daughter date him, he won't marry her?

Before you know you will receive wedding invite from him and his materialistic babe. You better start learning to ask.
Ignore all these people telling you to become a baby mama. You will cry

5 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Saintmary(f): 10:46pm On Jun 10, 2020
KenBen217:

so I'm not the only one who doesn't want to marry and just want kids
Get them from an orphanage. Is a simple sturvs

7 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by NiCurious: 10:47pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

If this is even a real post. His good points that I see, are only that he is calm and peaceful. "Not hitting you" is not a good point, it's the absence of a negative one! Nobody should hit you!
You take care of yourself, and never bother him financially--that is an excellent quality in you. But that same good quality becomes problematic when he sees that because you can take care of yourself, there is less burden of guilt on him when he decides to go his own way, leaving you bearing the cost of catering for his kids.
What exactly are this guy's good qualities besides calm and peaceful? He's uncommunicative about his plans with you until now, he seems emotionally unavailable, he doesn't support you in any way, and is therefore unlikely to support his children with you either, and just wants to use your body for his own procreation.
Sorry sister, but you can do much better than this guy. You can and will get over him. He is blocking your view of better guys.

13 Likes 4 Shares

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by melaxy: 10:47pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

If that's what he wants then he wasn't meant for you. Trust me, God never wanted that for you. You should be glad it came out now. You are 26. You are independent. Carry your self. You are a real prize to be won. Define it to Him that you are not ready to be his baby Mama and if he insists, opt out. ALL THINGS WORK TOGETHER FOR GOOD FOR THEM THAT LOVE GOD AND ARE CALLED ACCORDING TO HIS PURPOSE.

4 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Olojesamaga: 10:48pm On Jun 10, 2020
If he is good as portrayed he will know the importance of a house wife especially children upbringing.
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Nobody: 10:48pm On Jun 10, 2020
Dididrumz:
You sef be scared of His D too
exactly
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Confusedgirl869: 10:49pm On Jun 10, 2020
NiCurious:


If this is even a real post. His good points that I see, are only that he is calm and peaceful. "Not hitting you" is not a good point, it's the absence of a negative one! Nobody should hit you!
You take care of yourself, and never bother him financially--that is an excellent quality in you. But that same good quality becomes problematic when he sees that because you can take care of yourself, there is less burden of guilt on him when he decides to go his own way, leaving you bearing the cost of catering for his kids.
What exactly are this guy's good qualities besides calm and peaceful? He's uncommunicative about his plans with you until now, he seems emotionally unavailable, he doesn't support you in any way, and is therefore unlikely to support his children with you either, and just wants to use your body for his own procreation.
Sorry sister, but you can do much better than this guy. You can and will get over him. He is blocking your view of better guys.
Hmmm. Thanks

3 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Heavensent01(m): 10:49pm On Jun 10, 2020
you're emboldened with love and destruction. would you sacrifice your bright future for love that envelope with destruction? your response will answer your post



you even buttress this to be how you came to this earth yet you're still inconsiderate and wicked to want your kids come in the same line


how can you called someone that you spent 2years with and want you for just babymama a good man? are you this dumb? please don't use your naivety to bring full regret to the innocent kids you will birth to



I beg you confused girl, don't ever settle for less, there are many good men out there who want blissful togetherness, you've no reason to rush with that your age

5 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by barrypro: 10:49pm On Jun 10, 2020
shawnfamous:
I would suggest u become the baby mama that he craves for.. and stop crying over it.

Since u people don't have sense to think about what u want for ur lives.. I will keep on giving you mumu responses.
Bro, Get sense...
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by rosalieene(f): 10:50pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
Hmmm bae, what about my parents? Especially mum after all the home trainings she gave, wouldn't she think I disgraced her? Being the first daughter, you know how our parents think na.
You're the only one to suffer the stigma of being a baby mama not him.
dont let him coerce you because of love. dont deliberately become a baby mama to please a man.
indeed, if you try it, you will disgrace your family.
Its not about now but future. in future, he might marry someone else while leaving you his baby mama and ofcourse give excuses.
love yourself first.... sheybi its love? most of us have at one Time loved someone so much but today, we have no iota of feelings for them as we broke up with them. Leave the confused young man, soon you would meet someone else you would love as much, who loves you in return and ready to walk down the aisle with you.

3 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Confusedgirl869: 10:50pm On Jun 10, 2020
funmisticqueen2:
Aunty, walk.

I repeat. Walk.

It is not by force. He will never marry you, cos he doesn't love you.he just wants to see how much BS you can tolerate from him.


He is afraid of marriage, yet he's sleeping with you, what type of fuckery is that. Hope he is using condoms, and you are on contraception.

He doesn't see you as his dream girl. He has fuckboy written all over him. So if dangote's daughter date him, he won't marry her?

Before you know you will receive wedding invite from him and his materialistic babe. You better start learning to ask.
Ignore all these people telling you to become a baby mama. You will cry
The cry have been happening self, thanks dear. I had so much hope in this. Well, I thank God I even asked him earlier enough.

2 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Saintmary(f): 10:51pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
It's not uyail. My main is quite popular, I don't want this nairaland boys trolling me with my problem, you know how they are.
Sorry darling, just want you to know that some people care about you.
Please don't allow one selfish guy to rob you of long term happiness. At least, you have a chance of finding love if you're single and without this guy on your neck.
Cheers.

1 Like

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by lekbel09(m): 10:51pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.
My sister if you know what's good for you better run away because when you force this guy to marry you he will make marry a living hell for you cos he'd say you were the one who instigated it and he wasn't interested from the outset.

This is your opportunity to get out there and look for a guy that looks at life from your own point of view ,at least based on the issues of marriage which is the bone of contention here

All the best

1 Like

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Tbasicme: 10:51pm On Jun 10, 2020
Tadeknkeepcalm:

The older generation also faced some kind of stress. Maybe not this exact kind. But they faced one unique to their generation and they persevered.

Yeah it's true but the kind of emotional stress and trauma faced by youths of today makes them to be psychologically imbalance, vulnerable and a victim of a failed system. The youths are not even sure if themselves. You see a grown up young adult who can't take decision especially on some critical issues of life like marriage, career etc

4 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by pauladeboye(m): 10:52pm On Jun 10, 2020
Leave the guy and move on. There are still good men outside. You will find your own

1 Like

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by victorian(f): 10:53pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
Thanks Vic, our Nigerian chinese. I don receive sense this night.




Thank God.

And please cut off from him. He doesn't deserve you. There are good men out there who desires marriage and family.. Forget what guys here on nairaland talk about not getting married and debasing women. Most of them are broke and jobless with no hope in sight.
So they pour their frustrations talking trash about women.

Your unborn kids will love, adore And always pray for you, if you can give them a home with a complete family circuit.
You are still young. I'm in my 30s and no way will I settle for less and become baby mama! God forbid.

Dont dull for any man.. Pls.

May God see you through your life decisions successfully in Jesus name Amen.



Lol @ the Nigerian Chinese .

6 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by chinnasa: 10:54pm On Jun 10, 2020
You are lucky he told you the truth and you cant change him even if you force him after marriage he wants his space good. Marriage is for men not for boys. In marriage there is no my space it now our space. Infact nothing belongs to him. My dear take a break and think through this.

1 Like

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Nobody: 10:56pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
The cry have been happening self, thanks dear. I had so much hope in this. Well, I thank God I even asked him earlier enough.
please, don't accept men that do the barest minimum, get some standards and men with standards will follow.

You will cry for maximum of one week, then life will continue, you will wear heels, apply makeup, reply DMs, have fun and go on dates with better, richer men who know how to provide for and treat women with respect.

he may try to come back but don't accept him and if you do, tell him that he's on probation while you see other people.

Put yourself first and believe that you only deserve the best, not some boy's crumbs.

5 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Autogduru411: 10:56pm On Jun 10, 2020
He's not alone, they're many of us in this circle.

14 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by jaxxy(m): 10:58pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

I’m sure if u told him u don’t want kids he wud get up and leave or atleast not take it funny. So I believe he shud put himself in ur shoes. If he wants u, he will do the necessary. What is the meaning of babymama?? Is davido his role model?

I’m sure u know what to do, he’s definitely not the only man on earth. Marriage isn’t bad, it’s the people who come Into it that are bad or good and marriage only reflects that.
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Nobody: 10:58pm On Jun 10, 2020
May GOD bless that GUY of Yours.
How I wish I could make out time to see him.
He had nothing to lose being a BABY FATHER provided he has MONEY to foot their BILLS at Infancy and School Level

But marrying someone that will likely MURDER him is a BIG TURN Off.
NIGERIAN LADIES have insulted MEN so much.
Go to other Countries and see how they revere Nigerian Men.
Because when a NIGERIAN MAN is dating you, he spends on you and your entire family.
He marries you, he continues spending on your relatives who may end up relocating to live with their sisters in their husband houses.
Try that in EUROPE and AMERICA and see if that union would continue.
No BLACK AMERICAN, Mexican or Spanish will marry you and entertain your entire Family.
But a NIGERIAN MAN does it with free will, yet he is insulted by the Nigerian Ladies.

Other MEN should join.
If you must marry don't rush.
Wait and locate ABROAD BASED LADIES who work and share responsibilities with the man.
NIGERIAN LADIES heap responsibilities and age rooted family burdens on the husband.

13 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by joseph1832(m): 10:58pm On Jun 10, 2020
Ishilove:

You do know that kids born outside wedlock are bastards? However, we live in an age of political correctness where such words are considered offensive; it isn't the innocent kids fault that their parents chose to be senseless.

You haven't met your man, when you do, your goals will align and you will have peace of mind. Right now you're more confused than a cockroach confronted by the dazzling beam of a flashlight. Take a break from this guy. He is not yours.
now the bolded sound like a Game of Throne line. grin

1 Like

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Olayetan(m): 10:59pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

That man is scared of what you will become if he eventually marries you,

He's scared of you in particular.

7 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by bluefilm: 10:59pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
[s]Hello everyone. This account is created for thisThis issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.I need your opinions please[/s].

So, something I told you in secret, you had to bring it here to nairaland for what?

So that these punks can shame me or what?

Nonsense. angry
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Okwyjesus(m): 11:00pm On Jun 10, 2020
Ningen:
This is a man that doesn't want to marry you.
But you want to coerce him into it.

Are you that desperate for a ring?
A superficial deception to paddle a lie??

You talk about wanting a good home;
But here you are, ready to build one on a straw.

If you have to BEG and CONVINCE him to marry you, then surely he DOESN'T see your worth. It's all a facade; He will never be committed to you.

Your goals do not align. Find a new path.
There are men out there that'll tick your box.

Women can be funny....


Please settle with a man that see you precious enough to be his wife.
Let the young man look for his type.

2 Likes

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