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Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! - Family - Nairaland

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Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Nobody: 10:04pm On Sep 02, 2020
For over 20 years, my dad has being a chronic drunkard. drinking alcohol despite all my mom's effort to try and stop him. 2 years ago, he stopped drinking and he was beginning to look better, speak more coherently and not socially awkward, but now, he has gone back to his past behavior just earlier this year when he started making friends with another guy who drinks alcohol.

All these behavior leads to him not able to work and a lot of behaviors he exhibits that is totally nasty, behaving like a kid.

My mom and I have called him and talked to him on several occasions about it but he still always goes back to drink after he leaves home.

I'm totally fed up, even my mum is very sad about the situation.

How can I deal with this situation..

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Nobody: 10:14pm On Sep 02, 2020
the alcohol he takes has made to look very old.. he's always coughing now and has this nasty alcohol smell always trailing him wherever he is. to enter into the toilet immediately he's done is 100% impossible because of the strong alcohol smell

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Whitecoal711: 10:14pm On Sep 02, 2020
Hmm
this will really be hard oo
Sha don't give up
make I wait for elders of the house first

Keep discussing with him
don't give up
Also pray about it

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Nobody: 10:15pm On Sep 02, 2020
things haven't gone out of hand recently just because of the students who haven't resumed for school, or else, school fee would have been a problem, and so many other responsibilities would have been unattended to

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Bola146(f): 10:20pm On Sep 02, 2020
All of you need to show him love and pray for him

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Nobody: 10:20pm On Sep 02, 2020
he's the eldest of all his siblings and yet, the same alcohol trend run In the family. all his male siblings are chronic drunkards.

I'm his eldest son and I'm totally confused on what to do. right now, we're not on talking terms because his presence alone annoys me. I don't know what to do to make him just focus on his life and get on with his family. take care of himself. and stop being a nuisance to everyone.

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by shamsin6300(m): 10:21pm On Sep 02, 2020
Slawormir (Damn niggar)
Your alcoholic/weedy advice is fucking needed here. grin

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by PlayerMeji: 10:22pm On Sep 02, 2020
Wait for Righeousness99... He will soon be here.
He's our resident Apostle

91 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Nobody: 10:23pm On Sep 02, 2020
Bola146:
All of you need to show him love and pray for him

my mom prayed a lot.

love. we've been doing that since, he just find solace in sitting with those drunkards and discussing about "God knows what".

he never comes home early so that we can sit together as a family and talk about the day. it's just so tiring !!!

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Nobody: 10:26pm On Sep 02, 2020
I'm just scared of losing him because, he has a lot of responsibilities unattended to. and again, he's my only father

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by daddytime(m): 10:26pm On Sep 02, 2020
drunkdad:


my mom prayed a lot.

love. we've been doing that since, he just find solace in sitting with those drunkards and discussing "God knows what".

he never comes home early so that we can sit together as a family and talk about the day. it's just so tiring !!!

Very sorry about this situation you are faced with.

However, my earnest prayer for you is that whatever it is, even if it's a generational curse, the chains, and the cycle shall be halted and broken at your juncture.

It won't be passed on to you, your siblings, and lineage going forward.

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Bola146(f): 10:26pm On Sep 02, 2020
drunkdad:


my mom prayed a lot.

love. we've been doing that since, he just find solace in sitting with those drunkards and discussing about "God knows what".

he never comes home early so that we can sit together as a family and talk about the day. it's just so tiring !!!

Continue praying, don't be disturbed, have faith

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by MrOjay1(m): 10:27pm On Sep 02, 2020
This is sad.
I suggest you begin to flog your father with cane since he's stubborn.

Cane is the only language a drunkard understands.
It's no use advising him against it because he will surely do otherwise.

If you can't cane him,you can trail him to the bar where he drinks and embarass him and his friends.

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Nobody: 10:31pm On Sep 02, 2020
Bola146:


Continue praying, don't be disturbed, have faith

I just wish there's a proactive step I can take to just bring everything to a stop because if it's prayer. my mom has been doing that for over 20 years

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Franzinni: 10:33pm On Sep 02, 2020
There is a reason for his behavior find the problem and the cure won't be far off...

Get closer to him do your research on quitting alcohol and try and hold his hands through the steps ... May God give you the strength ...addiction is one scary demon

Thoughts become action and repeated action becomes habit and then becomes behavior ...

Reverse engineer till you find the thoughts and then break the triggers for those thoughts that lead to the action of drinking .. Research further if you are not clear .

18 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Shinny1: 10:45pm On Sep 02, 2020
Op you guy's shouldn't stop praying for him o nothing prayer can't change

No matter how annoying he can be get close to him and find out the problem and also tell your mum to still show him love

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by PureGoldh(m): 10:50pm On Sep 02, 2020
Just show him love bro....don't forget to always pray for him.

Get his best friend to talk to him....(Someone he listens to) that way he will get along with the advice(s) you people have being giving to him.

***Please Note *** Don't ever call him a drunkard or any abusive name as it will make him to take more bottles

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Nobody: 10:52pm On Sep 02, 2020
MrOjay1:
This is sad.
I suggest you begin to flog your father with cane since he's stubborn.

Cane is the only language a drunkard understands.
It's no use advising him against it because he will surely do otherwise.

If you can't cane him,you can trail him to the bar where he drinks and embarass he and his friends.

it's not possible flogging him... but the embarrassment part.... he's not embarrassed at all. My mom has done that many times and still didn't yield anything.

8 Likes

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Nobody: 10:53pm On Sep 02, 2020
PureGoldh:
Just show him love bro....don't forgot to always pray for him.

Get his best friend to talk to him....(Someone he listens to) that way he will get along with the advice(s) you people have being giving to him.

***Please Note *** Don't ever call him a drunkard or any abusive name as it will make him to take more bottles

friend...? he doesn't have any! all the people I know with him drinks alcohol too

18 Likes

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Nobody: 10:56pm On Sep 02, 2020
Franzinni:
There is a reason for his behavior find the problem and the cure won't be far off...

Get closer to him do your research on quitting alcohol and try and hold his hands through the steps ... May God give you the strength ...addiction is one scary demon

Thoughts become action and repeated action becomes habit and then becomes behavior ...

Reverse engineer till you find the thoughts and then break the triggers for those thoughts that lead to the action of drinking .. Research further if you are not clear .

the day I talked to him, he never said anything tangible being the reason for his sudden drinking attitude. what he usually say is that "your mom is not being submissive" and the only way my mom will be submissive to him is by not questioning him whether he drinks or not.

18 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by ChemicalReaction(f): 11:31pm On Sep 02, 2020
drunkdad:
he's the eldest of all his siblings and yet, the same alcohol trend run In the family. all his male siblings are chronic drunkards.

I'm his eldest son and I'm totally confused on what to do. right now, we're not on talking terms because his presence alone annoys me. I don't know what to do to make him just focus on his life and get on with his family. take care of himself. and stop being a nuisance to everyone.

There is a pattern. Young man, watch out for yourself.

29 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by duduade: 1:22am On Sep 03, 2020
Liver/Kidney problems approaching.

Don't worry he will soon be humbled

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Liftmaster: 2:02am On Sep 03, 2020
drunkdad:


I just wish there's a proactive step I can take to just bring everything to a stop because if it's prayer. my mom has been doing that for over 20 years

First, you need to recognize that he has a disease called alcohol addiction, then prepare to spend some money. Best case solution is to check him into an in house rehab program. I know there a some in Lagos and Abuja that do a good job. Next best solution is to get him away from his current environment to someplace else. Excessive drinking of alcohol is a social vice. Nobody likes to drink alone. Get him far away from his drinking buddies to another location, to a far away state if possible for a period of time. There is a high likely hood that he may have a change of heart when away from the bad influence of his buddies.
Finally, addictions are extremely difficult to overcome unless the addicted person is really reallly ready to change. Nothing will work until your Dad is convinced that he needs to change his life.

28 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Sage161(m): 5:57am On Sep 03, 2020
Very sad. Always remind him the effects of alcohol of excessive alcohol consumption never forgetting to use people as case study and keep praying for him. Who knows? He might dump those friends of his and quit that addiction
Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by mutter(f): 6:13am On Sep 03, 2020
If you want to help your dad send him to a rehabilitation center.
He can't come out of this alone.

22 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Nobody: 6:23am On Sep 03, 2020
Liftmaster:


First, you need to recognize that he has a disease called alcohol addiction, then prepare to spend some money. Best case solution is to check him into an in house rehab program. I know there a some in Lagos and Abuja that do a good job. Next best solution is to get him away from his current environment to someplace else. Excessive drinking of alcohol is a social vice. Nobody likes to drink alone. Get him far away from his drinking buddies to another location, to a far away state if possible for a period of time. There is a high likely hood that he may have a change of heart when away from the bad influence of his buddies.
Finally, addictions are extremely difficult to overcome unless the addicted person is really reallly ready to change. Nothing will work until your Dad is convinced that he needs to change his life.

thank you Sir

3 Likes

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Nobody: 6:26am On Sep 03, 2020
Sage161:
Very sad. Always remind him the effects of alcohol of excessive alcohol consumption never forgetting to use people as case study and keep praying for him. Who knows? He might dump those friends of his and quit that addiction

sadly, about 3 of his "friends" are already dead since he stopped about 3 years ago before he resumed again this year. I reminded him of all these, he just has stopped taking everything "right" thing as nothing serious.
Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Nobody: 6:29am On Sep 03, 2020
duduade:
Liver/Kidney problems approaching.

Don't worry he will soon be humbled

at the end of it all, his deteriorating health condition will be on my mom and me. All of his family members are nothing to write home about. set of very irresponsible and unserious people

16 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by Sage161(m): 6:33am On Sep 03, 2020
drunkdad:


sadly, about 3 of his "friends" are already dead since he stopped about 3 years ago before he resumed again this year. I reminded him of all these, he just has stopped taking everything "right" thing as nothing serious.
A loved one who experiences addiction usually understands that his experiences doesn't make sense. Trying to argue with obsessions or compulsions doesn’t help him nor change him. If he is to change, it must come from him. You should just keep praying and urging him to change then hope for the best

10 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by MANNABBQGRILLS: 6:33am On Sep 03, 2020
2 years ago, he stopped drinking and he was beginning to look better, speak more coherently and not socially awkward, but now, he has gone back to his past behavior just earlier this year when he started making friends with another guy who drinks alcohol.

An average Nairalander would have told you to kill the guy!!
But in this case, it is obvious there is nothing you can tell him to change his mind.
The only advice we can give you is to tell mom to let the elder ones in both family talk to him, this may not really change him anyways, cos you are talking about your dad here and not your elder brother!

All the very best to your dad.

Btw,
ALCOHOL KILLS!!
PRINT that out in Bold, RED LETTERS and paste it at your front door!

Again, All the very best.

ALCOHOLKILLS:
indeed it does
Baba has spoken! grin cheesy smiley

We Rise!


drunkdad:

hmm, his family is nothing to write home about. my dad is the most stubborn person I ever know and will take everyone's word with a pinch of salt whenever he's still drinking. He only comes to his senses whenever he stops drinking for like a week.
Hmmmmm, short of words at this point!

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Re: Help My Drunk Dad Before He Kills Himself..!!! by LadySarah: 6:44am On Sep 03, 2020
Is he the breadwinner?

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